I was so nervous for the two days before and was totally preparing myself for no heartbeat, no baby, or maybe twins! Turns out, baby is there, bouncing around, with a strong heartbeat and growing exactly on schedule. I can't tell you how relieved I felt. Suddenly this pregnancy felt real. My daughter watched her little brother or sister bouncing around on the screen and, for the first time in the last 10 weeks, I felt able to be excited about this.
Then, just as we were about to leave the room the doctor stopped us and said, "you know, you are only 10 weeks along and at the moment the chance of miscarriage is still very great, 20%. Not until 11 weeks does the chance drop to 2%."
Boom, there went my feelings of elation. My husband told me it was ridiculous Surely, if everything is right on track now then the chances can't change that dramatically in just one week can they?
Why do doctors use this scare tactic? Man, this is why I am with a lovely midwife!
Anyway, does anyone know whether I can start to relax a bit, or whether the chance of miscarriage really is still that high?
I hope you can, as you said, start to relax a bit, and enjoy the pregnancy! The statistic I do know is that the greatest odds are still that this baby will be just fine.
Boys: 12/94, 1/99, 11/03, 6/11. Girls: 11/06, 10/09, 12/12
Blah to doctors and their twisted around statistics!
I think what you should take away from the visit is that you have a beautiful, healthy, thriving little person growing inside of you and that the doctor not only has atrocious bedside manner but is most likely a sadist.
Just thought I'd DDC crash to say that MY doctor, who is wonderful, and who in the past has been very cautious about giving false hope, told me that after seeing a healthy pregnancy w/heartbeat at 8 weeks, the chance of miscarriage dropped to around 3%. Online, I see 3% and 5% come up frequently as the risk after healthy heartbeat. She also told me that most miscarriages happen by 8 weeks.
I know it's so, so hard to stay calm.
Fiction writer by training, writer/editor of anything anyone will hire me for by trade. Me + D=my girls E (4/2011) and little N, 1/2014.
The more doctors I go to, the more I realize that doctors sometimes talk out of their asses and don't always know as much as a well-informed patient.
SAHM to Bird (6/07) and Bear (7/09), and now enjoying our newest addition, born June 1, 2011!
I am 13 weeks pregnant and have felt the SAME as you did and was so stressed about the possibility of miscarriage that I wasn't sleeping at night. Mine was more along the lines of I can't *possibly* be lucky enough to have 3 healthy children so fate must be planning on kicking me in the rear at some point soon. Anyways, I had a great ultrasound at 8 weeks (actually the DR was fear-mongering too) and had a midwives appt. at 12 weeks where we again heard the heartbeat so I'm starting to accept that maybe I will be lucky again this time to bring a healthy child into this world. Remember, odds our definitely in our favor that everything is normal, healthy, and fine.
Thank you so much for sharing this. I think this is how I have been feeling. How can I possibly be this lucky again!?!? Something must go wrong this time!?!?! I think I am accepting that maybe it will all be ok though....well, I think I need to believe that everything will be ok. It is just so hard though isn't it!
Mama to a 5.5 yr old boy and a 2.5 yr old girl. Expecting baby 3 (another girl!) late June
I would think that seeing a moving baby with a strong heartbeat at 10 weeks is pretty much an ALL CLEAR for first trimester dangers.
I'm with you though. At 10 weeks myself, I have not heard a heartbeat or seen my baby on a sonogram. I just pray that in a week and a half when I go in to see my midwife, she can pick up a heartbeat on dopplar. If she doesn't, I think I will be in your exact same shoes of wanting to see a healthy baby so badly that I will do or pay whatever I have to so I can see that little person I'm carrying.
Enjoy those precious images of your own little one! I'm so happy for you!
Happy Wife since 12/31/05 ~ Blessed Mama to 2/8/09 and 6/11/11, with on the way due 2/24/14
if you cruise over to the may 2011 club there is a pretty identical post over there with a lot of reassuring things being said
mama to 9 year old h 3 year old z and brand spanking new baby m