How much help did you need after first baby? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 42 Old 04-06-2011, 01:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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At my midwife checkup yesterday, she mentioned that at our next appointment we'd be discussing what kind of help we're arranging for after the birth. I haven't really thought about this much...except that my Mom will probably fly down and visit for a week or two. She won't be staying with us since we only have 1 bedroom and I'm not sure how much work she can actually do since she has MS.


I was wondering if any of you had specific plans laid out for help before you delivered? Is this really necessary? My husband should be home with us for most of the first few weeks. I know we'll be tired and we'll probably ask a few people to cook some meals, but do we need to plan more help than that?


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#2 of 42 Old 04-06-2011, 01:50 PM
 
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DDCC.  We had no help with any of ours.  My parents came to visit for 2 days the week after my dd was born but all they did was take us out to eat.  With #3 a few people from church brought us meals for a week.

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#3 of 42 Old 04-06-2011, 02:16 PM
 
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I haven't had any help with any of mine and don't plan on it being any different this time around.  Dh stays home for anywhere from a few days to a week and then we just fall back into a routine.  Yes, I do take it more easy than normal and he has to work harder at nights and on the weekends for that first month, but I haven't ever felt the need for help.

 

HOWEVER, I did go to a doula meeting the other night and they were talking about post partum doulas.  It honestly sounded like a dream.  A really nice person that would come to your house, make you some food, and hold your baby while you showered and slept.  I can't even imagine getting pampered like that!!!  My mom and my MIL are both MIA when babies arrive and always have been so I have never had anyone step in to help.  I have also never had friends that were willing to bring food, etc.  So, if you do have that kind of support around you, you will probably be fine.  If you don't, you might consider hiring a post partum doula to start coming in a few hours a day when your dh goes back to work - probably just for a few weeks.


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#4 of 42 Old 04-06-2011, 02:43 PM
 
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I didn't have much help after my babies were born. This time around my kids are bigger so they'll be able to help out and we share a house with my mom so she will help out too. The main thing is meals for me. Especially with big kids. I'll be doing a shopping trip to stock up on as much stuff as possible, but people bringing meals is so great!

 

I'm going to be totally shameless and sign up on mealtrain.com and then email the link to everyone I know. Then they can either sign up to bring meals or not, as they prefer. Even a few meals would be better than nothing.


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#5 of 42 Old 04-06-2011, 03:19 PM
 
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Count me in the No Help club.  

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#6 of 42 Old 04-06-2011, 06:42 PM
 
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It's my first, and a friend of mine is organizing this for me through facebook.  She created an event and invited me, then i invited all the people i thought would be willing to join with the caveat "no obligation to join!!!". SO incredible and it's reminding me that people really do care!

 

it's hard for people to know exactly what to do but lots of people really do want to help, so that list or mealtrain is such a great idea. i know i would be so down if a pg friend asked me to sign up - i would feel like i actually helped!


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#7 of 42 Old 04-06-2011, 06:56 PM
 
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Well, in some ways I needed no help when #1 was born, but in some ways it was good to have my mom staying with us.  My ds had to be hospitalized for jaundice and I was kind of an emotional mess--I had to learn how to pump while he was in the hospital, and I had to get to the hospital when I wasn't supposed to be driving yet.  And then when he did come home, he was still very sleepy and not so interested in nursing, and I had no experience, so it was helpful to get some advice from my mom (who had breastfed two kids).  On the other hand, newborns sleep a lot, so I was able to sleep while he slept, and I was able to shower while he slept, and in many ways life was easier than commuting 1+ hours by train into NYC while 9 months pregnant (as I had been doing just a few weeks before).  I think it might have been nice to have someone visit around 2-3 months, when I was starting to get really exhausted from getting up in the night so much, and baby was awake more during the day.  After the excitement of the birth, the new baby had worn off, but things still hadn't settled into a good routine. 


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#8 of 42 Old 04-06-2011, 06:57 PM
 
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Well, in some ways I needed no help when #1 was born, but in some ways it was good to have my mom staying with us.  My ds had to be hospitalized for jaundice and I was kind of an emotional mess--I had to learn how to pump while he was in the hospital, and I had to get to the hospital when I wasn't supposed to be driving yet.  And then when he did come home, he was still very sleepy and not so interested in nursing, and I had no experience, so it was helpful to get some advice from my mom (who had breastfed two kids).  On the other hand, newborns sleep a lot, so I was able to sleep while he slept, and I was able to shower while he slept, and in many ways life was easier than commuting 1+ hours by train into NYC while 9 months pregnant (as I had been doing just a few weeks before).  I think it might have been nice to have someone visit around 2-3 months, when I was starting to get really exhausted from getting up in the night so much, and baby was awake more during the day.  After the excitement of the birth, the new baby had worn off, but things still hadn't settled into a good routine. 


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#9 of 42 Old 04-06-2011, 07:02 PM
 
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It can depend on your relationship with your parents/in-laws.  I've seen situations where it looks like parents have been great helps - whether emotional or physical.  Personally, I prefer for the help to be my husband (especially with #1 - with subsequent kids I kinda wished I had more help with dealing with the older children).  If anyone offers to help, don't turn them down, though!  Suggest specific tasks like laundry, food, grocery shopping, etc . . . 

 

 

 

 

 

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#10 of 42 Old 04-06-2011, 07:10 PM
 
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I had a child last March and was fortunate that my DH was laid off/in between jobs because I was a complete mess for months.  I had an emergency C-section, so I was physically laid up for quite awhile, also.  If he had not been around, I would have had to have relied on MIL and that would have been really, really bad for many reasons.  I don't have anyone alive from my family of origin (no mom to count on, that kind of thing).  All I can say is, it was rough and DH was a saint and I sure count my blessings that he was available and willing and loving.  'Nuff said for me.  Good luck for you.


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#11 of 42 Old 04-07-2011, 05:04 AM
 
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The first baby changes you in ways you could never imagine. It is so hard to say what an appropriate amount of help would be, simply because everyone is so different. For me, I had my MIL and cousin come by for a few hours every day the first week, then tapering off in the weeks after. I had a c section and had a very hard time recovering so any help I could get was much appreciated. *But* - I was also fiercely protective of my DS and had a very hard time letting anyone else hold or change him, so mostly their "help" was just cooking and keeping me company.

I found that the first few weeks is kind of like a baby fog - once reality sets in, that's when you need the help!! When DS was about 4-5 months old, I found myself really needing a few hours here and there to myself, so that's when MIL came in very handy. I never left for him with her for more than 3 hours until he was well over a year old, but the time I did have was pure bliss. Even if it was just spent taking a nice, long hot shower and shaving my legs!

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#12 of 42 Old 04-07-2011, 07:57 AM
 
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I didn't need any help after my first born twins. I kind of got help as in MIL came and then my mom came after. In hindsight they weren't all that helpful in what I really needed. I could have used help, dishes, laundry, but got none of that. Now I have a slew of big kids to help so I am set and dh will take off for 7 weeks or so.


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#13 of 42 Old 04-07-2011, 09:42 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks Ladies! It sounds like you really can't plan ahead for what you'll need. We'll probably set up a list or mealtrain of friends to call on for food. ...and if someone gifts us a PPD we'll obviously take her! winky.gif ...I think now I"m more concerned about my husband leaving the country for 3 weeks when she's 2 months old. I guess we'll deal with that when we get there.

 


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#14 of 42 Old 04-07-2011, 10:02 AM
 
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Unless your family is nearby (or you have a very strong friend network) and able to help as much as needed I think hiring a postpartum doula on a part-time basis for the first few weeks is the ideal situation. Post-partum doulas can often be found locally at a reduced price if you are willing to use one that is less experienced. Most post-partum doulas will help the new family adjust to their new reality, pamper the new mom while helping with some light household chores. Heaven sent help for a new mother allowing her to relax and bond with her newborn without worrying about the dishes that haven't been done yet. The doula will take care of those for the family. Got challenges with breastfeeding a good post-partum doula can help with minor problems and will know who to refer you to for bigger issues.

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#15 of 42 Old 04-07-2011, 10:18 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kawa kamuri View Post

Count me in the No Help club.  



Same here.  DH was home a week (he wanted more but his position said no).  I enjoyed being on my own with DS.  It allowed me to settle in a bit with him and find our vibe together.


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#16 of 42 Old 04-07-2011, 11:11 AM
 
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Same.  My family is willing but I want to babymoon with just DH at least for 3 weeks.  Maybe after a month or 2 (whenever sleep deprivation starts to set in) I'll be more open to "helpers" staying in house but until then I'll just direct people to drop off food if they want to do something.  By then I think I will have my own parenting style & routines in place without feeling like people are meddling more than helping.  I'm not worried about the house or laundry, DH is amazing when it comes to that stuff.
 

Quote:
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Count me in the No Help club.  



 


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#17 of 42 Old 04-08-2011, 03:22 PM
 
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I wholeheartedly agree! I think hiring a postpartum doula is a great idea! After my first last March my husband was back at work 3 days after our son's birth - he could not take more time off. We were living in a new city and really didn't know a lot of people yet. My mom did come up and stay with me for a week, which was nice but not long enough and really she wasn't able to help me as much as I needed since she is heavily medicated for her illness. Because we knew this was going to be the situation we interviewed a few postpartum doulas and ended up hiring one that was recommended to me by my midwife. 

 

She was wonderful!!! I have very fond memories of the days she came to help. After rough nights of no sleep, she would come in the morning, wrap my little guy into a moby, and cook some fantastic meals for us as well as some sweet treats for me. She did light house cleaning too. I got to snooze, or if I wasn't tired we chatted while she worked and I tended to my baby. It's so true that she really helped me adjust to the new reality of being a parent. We had so many wonderful conversations, and she had so much great advice. We had great "chemistry" so to speak. She had a lot of experience with a lot of different babies, as well as with her own child. I loved having her so much we ended up using her services for 2.5 months! She came 3 days a week for 3 to 4 hours each time, until we weaned down to 2 days a week 2-3 hours at a time. 

 

My recommendation would be that if you do want to hire a postpartum doula make sure to interview a few and pick the one you feel the best with. Maybe in your situation, since your husband will be home the first few weeks, I would have a doula start when he started working again. 

 

At the time I was living in Santa Cruz, CA so if anyone is looking for a postpartum doula recommendation PM me and I'd be happy to give you her contact information. thumb.gif
 

Quote:
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Unless your family is nearby (or you have a very strong friend network) and able to help as much as needed I think hiring a postpartum doula on a part-time basis for the first few weeks is the ideal situation. Post-partum doulas can often be found locally at a reduced price if you are willing to use one that is less experienced. Most post-partum doulas will help the new family adjust to their new reality, pamper the new mom while helping with some light household chores. Heaven sent help for a new mother allowing her to relax and bond with her newborn without worrying about the dishes that haven't been done yet. The doula will take care of those for the family. Got challenges with breastfeeding a good post-partum doula can help with minor problems and will know who to refer you to for bigger issues.



 

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#18 of 42 Old 04-08-2011, 07:22 PM
 
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We had a 7 year old foster son and 2 year old foster daughter when I had my first 2 years ago.  We live a days plane ride away from family.  My parents came up 2 weeks early, I was 2 weeks over due and they stayed 4 weeks after that.

 

I had a c-section.  Every morning DH would take DD downstairs after I feed her and my stepmom would rock her for a couple of hours while I slept and until she needed to eat again.  I would then come downstairs to breakfast, coffee and a freshly changed baby.  It was awesome.  I really would not have been able to take care of the other kids if it wasn't for them.  

 

Having good help is important.  Having bad help is terrible.

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#19 of 42 Old 04-08-2011, 09:58 PM
 
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DDC crashing.  My dh went back to work after the weekend (DD1 was born on Thursday night).  My mom was with us for almost 2 weeks.  I freaked out when she left.  I was so scared to be left alone with this little baby.  #2 was easier emotionally, but she actually stayed almost a month, so it was super nice to have her play with DD2.  

 

I think with your DH's help, it should be pretty good.


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#20 of 42 Old 04-09-2011, 05:23 AM
 
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I had zero help. DH went back to work 3 days after ds was born (he was teaching at the time). We both had no family anywhere close by, and our parents are still working themselves. I had a really hard time recovering and although I had stocked up on freezer meals, I wish I would have found more ways to get help. The hospital told me not to drive for 2 weeks, so I was housebound and lonely with the changing hormones, breastfeeding being an extremely tormenting experience (timewise and painwise), I wish I would have organized a postpartum doula or at least someone to come and clean our home once per week or so, plus I had to go back to work at 4 weeks and felt the pressure building and was exhausted with our high needs baby.

 

So my advice - get help, any help you can get, will be useful. Ask friends and neighbours to bring food, or take the baby for even just an hour at a time, so you can get some rest, and take a shower.

 

Given, not every situation is as ours, but one just does not know how easy recovery will be, how easy breastfeeding will come (start looking for 2-3 good Lactation Consultants in your area now, or go to an LLL meeting), or there may be a high needs baby on the way. And even if things are easier, any help will make your life easier and allow for more time for the parents as well.


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#21 of 42 Old 04-09-2011, 08:09 AM
 
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My husband had to go back to class the afternoon after we got home so I was really glad that my parents were visiting (though not staying with us in our one bedroom apartment). I really appreciated that I could nap when I needed more sleep and know that the baby would be snuggled (and photographed in natural light). My parents are the kind of people who do not make a fuss, but somehow clean up and make your favourite dinner. I was also glad for the company. Our church really took care of us in terms of food and it was wonderful to not even have to think about that. It took me about a month or 6 weeks to get back into the swing of cooking dinner every night.

All that said I had an easy birth on my body and if I had been more physically limited I would have needed more concrete help.

 

 


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#22 of 42 Old 04-09-2011, 09:40 AM
 
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I haven't read all the other responses you got, but I wanted to say that any and all help was very welcome in our case, and it still wasn't easy adjusting.

 

I had a super easy home birth - hardly any pain at all. However, my tailbone must have moved because it took me a full month before I could sit up at all and even then it was quite painful for a few more weeks. For the first weeks, I could barely turn over or get out of bed without help because my tailbone hurt so badly.

 

My husband was very helpful. He took four weeks off of work, and they flew by. He did all the diaper changes and also rocked, bounced, danced, etc. I nursed a LOT. Our little one was rather colicky, and he wanted to be on the breast pretty much non stop for the first three months. It was quite an adjustment for me and I needed someone to spell me every few hours so my nipples and I could get a few minutes rest. It took me at least three weeks to learn to sleep at all while nursing, and our little one really did not sleep at all without my nipple in his mouth! (We tried, believe me!) It was all my husband could do to keep him from screaming when he was not on the breast. Our sweet little baby also hated slings, car seats, and swaddles with an incredible passion. 

 

My Mother came to help us for the first 2 weeks. She cooked, cleaned, and took turns holding the little guy for us.

My Mother in Law came to help us for the next 6 weeks. This really helped with the transition when my husband had to go back to work. She cooked, cleaned, and kept me company while my husband was working. She helped with diaper changes and kept our spirits up with new ideas to try and enduring confidence.

My Sister and Father came at the 8 week mark to help us move from our one bedroom apartment into our new house across country. That took a little over a week to accomplish. They also helped out some with holding the baby, etc.

 

I would say we averaged about 2-4 hours of sleep a night for the first few months, and that slowly increased over the first year. We probably averaged 5-7 hours of sleep (although always with many interruptions) through the second year. My husband and my relationship struggled, especially in the early months. We had been together for 7 years before having a baby, and were extremely close and supportive of each other. It was still a rocky adjustment. We really felt like we had no time to talk with each other, even with all the help we had. 

 

Our family has continued to come visit us about once a month and sometimes my MIL stays for a week. It's been so helpful. We really look forward to their visits as times when my husband and I will get some help with our little guy and a chance to get some other things done. He's now three, and I have to say that we've had a really easy second year - no real tantrums, potty trained smoothly, and is a happy and easy-going little three year old. He still needs a lot of attention though, and we have a lot on our plates with full time jobs, evening graduate classes, home ownership, etc.

 

I don't know how people manage to do things on their own with no help!

 

 

 

 

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#23 of 42 Old 04-09-2011, 11:16 AM
 
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My mom stayed with us for three days after the birth and then my doula (who attended the birth) come over several hours/day for the next four days.  I loved having the extra help and emotional support.  My doula is also a certified LC, which was SO helpful as I had trouble getting the hang of breastfeeding.  

 

I made tentative plans before Liam was born with mom and doula and knew they were available if I wanted the help, but I waited until he arrived to decide what I needed exactly.  I would recommend playing it by ear if you can.  


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#24 of 42 Old 04-09-2011, 01:14 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JoyFilled View Post

We had a 7 year old foster son and 2 year old foster daughter when I had my first 2 years ago.  We live a days plane ride away from family.  My parents came up 2 weeks early, I was 2 weeks over due and they stayed 4 weeks after that.

 

I had a c-section.  Every morning DH would take DD downstairs after I feed her and my stepmom would rock her for a couple of hours while I slept and until she needed to eat again.  I would then come downstairs to breakfast, coffee and a freshly changed baby.  It was awesome.  I really would not have been able to take care of the other kids if it wasn't for them.  

 

Having good help is important.  Having bad help is terrible.


I second this, very much. I needed a lot of help, but I blessed to live in the same town as my mother. So she could come over whenever, and didn't need to stay with us. We have a very good relationship and she was one hundred percent on board with the type of parenting i wanted to do and didn't bug or question my judgement. We even would read together on what to do in certain situations. But, if my mom would come over and told me what to do, how to do things, and made me doubt my choices, it would have been a toxic environment and bad for my very insecure parenting confidence.

 

I found that I could easily take care of the baby, but needed help with taking care of myself. I had a fourth degree tear and significant blood loss, so I was very sore and had very little energy. Throw in the normal sleep deprivation and the massive amounts of time spent nursing, and I would easily let my self care slip, The best thing my mom did when she was here was provide me with nutritious meals and keep me hydrated as I nursed. Since I was getting such little sleep, things such as good meals and showers really helped me feel more rested. My mom also kept my house clean, which made me feel more at ease. My husband went back to work very early, so if my mom wouldn't have been here, it would have been just me.

 

I am someone that couldn't have done it alone. I would have had a very difficult time. If you don't have a good relationship with your mom or she isn't able to help, I would greatly suggest a post-partum doula, just based on my experience. You might be able to do it on your own, though. In my opinion, those first couple of weeks are such a special time. It is so nice to just focus on sleeping, nursing and baby bonding and nothing else. If you have the $$, I would think it is well worth it. Also, this is such a unique time when it's your first. Since you don't have any other little one, you would be able to just focus on her, somethign that you will not be able to do if you have anymore.

 

I also had church friends bring meals for the first week. That was helpful because as my husband came homee from work, my mom would leave. He wouldn't have to worry about dinner, and we could both spend time with baby or he could give attention to the baby without having to worry about dinner. Plus a fed husband equals a much, much happier husband :)

 


Mama femalesling.GIF of a sweet little daughter diaper.gif , born 7/10/2010. Married to my dream boat of a hubby partners.gif, 8/20/2009.

 
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#25 of 42 Old 04-09-2011, 03:02 PM
 
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Ideally, you should spend the first 4 weeks doing nothing but resting and nursing your baby, to recover and build a great milk supply. (And with your first, there is slightly more of a chance of this than when you have other small kiddos running around, so try to!!). So if you can arrange for help with basically everything else, that would be best - whether it is pet care, housekeeping, gardening, errand running etc. I say arrange for as much help with these things as you can either afford, or can arrange with helpful friends. Right now, it might be helpful for you to make a list of all of the things you do around the house, so that there is no excuse for hubby to not know what he can be doing. And if a friend asks "what can I do" you don't have to think, you can just look at your list and say - can you go fold all of that laundry, or can you run to the cleaners ? I had the "top 10" list of things I needed my husband to take care for the first couple of months - the things I just couldn't bring my tired self to do - like empty all trash, containers in and out on trash day, scoop the dog poo in yard, and walk them whenever he was home, do not leave even one dish in the sink or I will freak, etc.

I totally agree about "good" help, too. My mom came, but didn't want to do anything but hold the baby, and that was all I wanted to do, too (and what mama SHOULD be doing!), so I would be so angry when I would doze off in the afternoon and come down at 6 and she would say "what do you want to do about dinner?" I plan on making my expectations a lot clearer with the next one.

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#26 of 42 Old 04-09-2011, 04:01 PM
 
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Good help vs any help is certainly another factor. My mother came for 10 days when ds was 8 weeks old. She never changed a diaper (did not want to do modern cloth diapers), she never tried bouncing, rocking ds, he was always handed back to me when he started crying, she cooked once, but I had to chop vegetables, and do the shopping, she never cleaned. I don't mind having guest, I love having guests, but she promised help and I got a houseguest that entertained me and critized most of my parenting and lifestyle choices "you sleep on the floor????" "you co-sleep?" "you clothdiaper?" " you don't have a dryer?"  And that from a person, that clothdiapered her first 2 kids and didn't have a washer until the third... Anyhow, I am still a bit disappointed.


Mom since Oct'09. Wife to a loving husband. Expecting a little bean in May'12

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#27 of 42 Old 04-10-2011, 12:07 AM
 
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Agreeing with most of the experienced moms here and adding again that it totally depends on your birth and your baby's disposition. I had a c-section so I was in the hospital for 4 days and when I came back home all I did was take care of DD for 2 months as she would just cry as soon as she was off the nipple. I faced a tough recover but the adrenaline rush makes me think now that I was really superhuman. My mom religiuosly took care of the kitchen and I didnt have to worry about cooking at all. DD on the other hand was very high needs and as later we found out has special needs and underlying health issues as well.SO, yeah really be prepared and have backups ready in any case.some newborns ( like DD) just didnt sleep much and had her sleep cycles reversed and stayed awake all night.:-( I am quite traumatised with my first experience.

This time around we dont have my mom coming in so I am going to seek help from a postpartum doula or mothers helpers from craigslist.

 

 


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#28 of 42 Old 04-10-2011, 11:20 AM
 
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Specific tasks are definitely a terrific idea.  I posted a link to this list earlier in the thread but think I buried it in my text:

 

http://www.glorialemay.com/blog/?p=34

 

It is v. close to what caemommy is describing. A friend of mine is organizing it for me, even though my partner and mother will be with me for the first 2 weeks.  We sent it out to a group of friends and already at least a dozen people have signed on. It's really touching to know people really want to help and by listing specific tasks, it will be more than just a nice thought.

 

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by caemommy View Post

Ideally, you should spend the first 4 weeks doing nothing but resting and nursing your baby, to recover and build a great milk supply. (And with your first, there is slightly more of a chance of this than when you have other small kiddos running around, so try to!!). So if you can arrange for help with basically everything else, that would be best - whether it is pet care, housekeeping, gardening, errand running etc. I say arrange for as much help with these things as you can either afford, or can arrange with helpful friends. Right now, it might be helpful for you to make a list of all of the things you do around the house, so that there is no excuse for hubby to not know what he can be doing. And if a friend asks "what can I do" you don't have to think, you can just look at your list and say - can you go fold all of that laundry, or can you run to the cleaners ? I had the "top 10" list of things I needed my husband to take care for the first couple of months - the things I just couldn't bring my tired self to do - like empty all trash, containers in and out on trash day, scoop the dog poo in yard, and walk them whenever he was home, do not leave even one dish in the sink or I will freak, etc.

I totally agree about "good" help, too. My mom came, but didn't want to do anything but hold the baby, and that was all I wanted to do, too (and what mama SHOULD be doing!), so I would be so angry when I would doze off in the afternoon and come down at 6 and she would say "what do you want to do about dinner?" I plan on making my expectations a lot clearer with the next one.



 


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#29 of 42 Old 04-10-2011, 12:32 PM
 
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that's an awesome list! I would have cried to have a friend volunteer to do any of those! As it is, the friends I had who brought food in those dark post partum days remain like bright stars in my memory (7 yrs and 5 yrs ago!) ! I remember each meal, too - as simple but thoughtful as they are! 

The great thing about having a baby yourself, is you realize who to be an even better friend to those around you having babies! :)
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by LLtheTinkerbell View Post

Specific tasks are definitely a terrific idea.  I posted a link to this list earlier in the thread but think I buried it in my text:

 

http://www.glorialemay.com/blog/?p=34

 

It is v. close to what caemommy is describing. A friend of mine is organizing it for me, even though my partner and mother will be with me for the first 2 weeks.  We sent it out to a group of friends and already at least a dozen people have signed on. It's really touching to know people really want to help and by listing specific tasks, it will be more than just a nice thought.

 

 



 



 

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#30 of 42 Old 04-10-2011, 01:12 PM
 
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Well I had my daughter 2 wks early and so she was small and my midwife made sure of no tears etc. I was fine to do everything but my tummy felt a little weak so bending was not fun for a few days. I was back with hubby within a month but ok really two weeks after. My mom helped a bit so did my ma in law. They walked the dogs and cleaned. That was about it.Plan for more help than u need and then you can alway ssend someone home if necessary.:)

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