Hypnobabies Failure - Mothering Forums
June 2011 > Hypnobabies Failure
swimming-duck's Avatar swimming-duck 06:12 AM 05-11-2011

Anyone else doing hypnobabies? I'm really struggling with it. I've been having a touch of RLS this time around and that's not helping. Ever since I hit week two with the light switch, I've found hypnobabies extremely difficult. I can't relax at all. When I start to feel my anesthesia, my nerves go nuts and it worsens until I finally give in, flip my switch on and move. The problem is that I'm having to do this pretty much constantly throughout each session. It was so bad last night during the Deepening track that I finally just flipped my switch on and listened to the rest without even attempting to flip my switch back off. I'm frustrated because I really wanted this to work for me, but the relaxation is just not happening. I've read that RLS peaks at 7 or 8 months in pregnancy and then gradually goes away and is usually gone by the time labor hits. I'm hoping that this is the case, but in the meantime I feel like it's ruining all of my hypnobabies practice.

 

Anyone else struggling with it at all?



tracymom1's Avatar tracymom1 06:51 AM 05-11-2011
I am not doing any birth prep this time around, but last time I gave up on Hypnobabies around the 7 month mark. I can't force myself into relaxation - for me it is something that is either there or it isn't. And since I didn't really have any fear or anxiety about the pain of childbirth, it was nearly impossible to get into the right frame of mind to successfully complete the program.

I have heard from a few of my friends (who swear by the Hypnobabies method) that it gets kind of annoying towards the end, but if you stick it out it is totally worth it. A good friend of mine had a 40 hour labor and completely natural childbirth and says that she would have never gotten through it without the program - everyone who was with her was convinced she would end up with an epidural and possibly a c-section (she was *lucky* that her OB let her labor as long as she wanted without really pushing any interventions).

Good luck!
coharmony's Avatar coharmony 10:31 AM 05-11-2011

oh my gosh yes! As soon as I got to the light switch I feel like a big failure. So I have just been doing what you do, leaving the switch on.  The second I turn it off I feel like my whole body gets twitchy so I'm just not going to stress it. I think I'll move on to the third week today. Don't know what else to do.


veganyogamomma's Avatar veganyogamomma 12:38 PM 05-11-2011

I know exactly what you mean! Just a thought, but have you tried practicing at a different time of day?

 

I've found that sometimes at night, I get restless exactly like you said. If I practice at other times of the day, it's usually better.

 

And there's no reason why you can't just keep flipping your switch to on and moving when you feel like you need to. You'll still get the benefit of the program because your subconscious is still hearing the messages. Try not to be so hard on yourself, let yourself move, and accept that the program will work anyway. It's not like you're going to be staying completely frozen stiff during labor either!!

 

Are you doing the home study course? I am so I don't have an instructor to talk to, but they do give you a number to call if you have questions. Maybe they would have some other suggestions for you as well?

 

I hope that helps! And if you're still frustrated by it, remember that not all programs are right for all people. Just stick with whatever feels best to you!


kalamos23's Avatar kalamos23 12:59 PM 05-11-2011
are you anemic? I get horrible rls at that point with both pregnancies bc my iron drops, irlt is a common time for your iron to be at its lowest point. Anyway, if you can raise your iron levels, you mighty find that the rls doesn't bother the relaxation. I was recommended vitanicas iron builder pills and got.my levels from 9.5 to 11.6 in 3 weeks. Hth!
Bald_Bull's_Mama's Avatar Bald_Bull's_Mama 08:52 PM 05-11-2011

I JUST had this conversation with my friend who had her baby 3 weeks ago. This is the one  who's homebirth I attended and she was so calm with her Hypnobaby-ing. Ask Brande about her thoughts on Hypnobabies, Crystal! At any rate, she had the same thing towards the end. I'm getting it, too. Like, as soon as I flip my switch, I'm itchy, I'm fidgety, it's weird and annoying. It doesn't happen when I do my practice, just with the CDs. I've heard a cal-mag supplement can help. Thinking of looking into it. It certainly is distracting, constantly turning my switch to center. Now, I was doing a little while I was getting my massage tonight and I didn't feel twitchy at all. So, maybe I need some sort of physical sensory input to stay relaxed and still? Hmmmm. At any rate, I'm just plugging along doing the best I can. After seeing how amazing M's birth was, I am so inspired to have HB work for me. Keep at it, mama!


swimming-duck's Avatar swimming-duck 09:19 PM 05-11-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by tracymom1 View Post

. A good friend of mine had a 40 hour labor and completely natural childbirth and says that she would have never gotten through it without the program - everyone who was with her was convinced she would end up with an epidural and possibly a c-section (she was *lucky* that her OB let her labor as long as she wanted without really pushing any interventions).


Yay for your friend! Thank you for this story. This gives me hope!



Quote:
Originally Posted by coharmony View Post

oh my gosh yes! As soon as I got to the light switch I feel like a big failure. So I have just been doing what you do, leaving the switch on.  The second I turn it off I feel like my whole body gets twitchy so I'm just not going to stress it. I think I'll move on to the third week today. Don't know what else to do.


That's what I'm trying to do - keep trudging through it even if my actual sessions kind of suck. I mean, I'm 33 weeks. I can't exactly hold out for perfection here!

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by veganyogamomma View Post

I know exactly what you mean! Just a thought, but have you tried practicing at a different time of day?

 

I've found that sometimes at night, I get restless exactly like you said. If I practice at other times of the day, it's usually better.

 


I do think my practice could be better if I could do it earlier in the day, but there's no time. I start my day early with daycare and there's no way I'm going to be able to get up any earlier than I do. Right now I have an infant enrolled who's only 13 weeks, so she's carried a lot. So even during nap time when all of the older ones are sleeping, I'm usually wearing her. I obviously can't practice my hypnobabies while wearing her. Then in the evening it's honestly go go go until my DS's nap time. So it's a struggle to even just want to do it at bedtime as I'm exhausted. But I do think I'd be less twitchy if I could do it earlier...but it just can't be helped right now. :(


Quote:

Originally Posted by kalamos23 View Post

are you anemic? I get horrible rls at that point with both pregnancies bc my iron drops, irlt is a common time for your iron to be at its lowest point. Anyway, if you can raise your iron levels, you mighty find that the rls doesn't bother the relaxation. I was recommended vitanicas iron builder pills and got.my levels from 9.5 to 11.6 in 3 weeks. Hth!


Not that I'm aware of. But I've wondered about my iron levels since I've developed RLS. I didn't have it during my pregnancy with my DS.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bald_Bull's_Mama View Post

I JUST had this conversation with my friend who had her baby 3 weeks ago. This is the one  who's homebirth I attended and she was so calm with her Hypnobaby-ing. Ask Brande about her thoughts on Hypnobabies, Crystal! At any rate, she had the same thing towards the end. I'm getting it, too. Like, as soon as I flip my switch, I'm itchy, I'm fidgety, it's weird and annoying. It doesn't happen when I do my practice, just with the CDs. I've heard a cal-mag supplement can help. Thinking of looking into it. It certainly is distracting, constantly turning my switch to center. Now, I was doing a little while I was getting my massage tonight and I didn't feel twitchy at all. So, maybe I need some sort of physical sensory input to stay relaxed and still? Hmmmm. At any rate, I'm just plugging along doing the best I can. After seeing how amazing M's birth was, I am so inspired to have HB work for me. Keep at it, mama!

 

THIS is very encouraging. Brande and I talked about a possible cal-mag supplement at my last appt. I may try it if the RLS persists. I don't get restless usually during my short practices either, although I'm not at all consistent with doing them. I really need to find time to get better with this. But the CD practice I'm so restless that it's practically painful to do it. But I'm kind of hoping that if I just plug along, my body will know what to do during labor even if all of my practice up until then absolutely sucks!
 

 


Smokering's Avatar Smokering 10:44 PM 05-11-2011

I don't have RLS, but for several weeks (before the weather got colder) the FLIES were making all my sessions miserable! It's very hard to visualise being deeply anaesthetised when you can feel a fly crawling on your leg. :p Luckily most of them have gone by now, and I think I'm pretty much over the hump in terms of rebelling against relaxation during my sessions... or maybe I'm just too tired to move! Occasionally I have a restless day on which I have to flip my switch to centre many times and shift around, but I think that's OK - it just gives me more practice at flipping my switch on and off, and that's not a bad thing! If I don't make a big (mental) deal about it, it doesn't seem to affect my concentration level too much.


swimming-duck's Avatar swimming-duck 05:36 AM 05-12-2011


Quote:
Originally Posted by Smokering View Post

I don't have RLS, but for several weeks (before the weather got colder) the FLIES were making all my sessions miserable! It's very hard to visualise being deeply anaesthetised when you can feel a fly crawling on your leg. :p Luckily most of them have gone by now, and I think I'm pretty much over the hump in terms of rebelling against relaxation during my sessions... or maybe I'm just too tired to move! Occasionally I have a restless day on which I have to flip my switch to centre many times and shift around, but I think that's OK - it just gives me more practice at flipping my switch on and off, and that's not a bad thing! If I don't make a big (mental) deal about it, it doesn't seem to affect my concentration level too much.


This might be part of my problem. Once I get the slightest bit twitchy, I just start getting irritated and that makes it worse!

 

Well, I don't want to jinx it or anything, but last night's practice was better. I still got twitchy, but I made it much longer before the twitchiness started. I also tried hard to let myself be okay with the twitchiness and just turn my switch on and off as needed. I'm on week 3 where I'm learning eyes open hypnosis. This is a bit hard for me. I do need to practice it more though. It's hard to find the time during the day to do my practices. I really do want to stick with it though and make it work. I've watched some youtube hynobabies births and they look amazing!

 


jshannyn519's Avatar jshannyn519 12:53 PM 05-12-2011

I have zero Hypnobabies experience, but I do have RLS. I take a 400 mg mag supplement at bedtime every couple of nights and it makes a world of difference. I was taking it every night, but I found that I could take it once every 2 or 3 nights and the effects would last. Plus with the mag supplement I don't get those horrific pregnancy leg cramps either.


swimming-duck's Avatar swimming-duck 07:18 AM 05-16-2011

I read an amazing birth story of a mama in my area who did a home birth using hypnobabies. She had RLS and had trouble with her practice just like I am right now...and went on to have a lovely birth. She was able to use her hypnobabies in the  moment of labor even though her practices weren't great. This was so reassuring for me to read. I think I'll just keep plugging away at it and trust the process and know that it will all be filed in my subconscious when I need it!


artekah's Avatar artekah 07:45 AM 05-16-2011
DDCC. Don't think of it as a failure! I get the twitchy thing too, and I try to think of it as my body releasing built-up nervous tension. I usually need to switch to center to fidget, swallow, scratch, etc. many, many times, and sometimes it's easier to just keep it in center. I feel like center switch totally counts as being "off" with the only difference being that you're allowed to move, so it's a good compromise when you can't relax fully but you don't want to go all the way "on."

Just stick with it and re-read reminder 1. It'll work for you in whatever way is best for you, and you don't have to worry about how you are experiencing it--all you have to do is listen to the tracks faithfully. Thinking of it this way takes the pressure off.
swimming-duck's Avatar swimming-duck 06:12 AM 05-18-2011

Thanks for that radicaleel! I do feel that as I've pressed on with it, I feel much more okay just switching to center repeatedly and/or staying in center. I know I'm still getting the practice in and reality wise I highly doubt that I'm going to be staying completely still during labor anyways. I imagine that center is where I will most often find myself. I'm actually really loving the hypnobabies despite my original frustrations!


Mosaic's Avatar Mosaic 06:31 AM 05-18-2011
DDCC because I saw this under New Posts and totally remember that driving me crazy with my first!! I can't remember now how/when/if that went away, but I think I tried to use that in my practice sessions... like, if I could ignore or relax through the annoying RLS, then I could relax during the birthing! I ended up having 2 fabulous hypnobirths, btw, and FWIW I did stay on center pretty much the entire time.

It sounds like you're all doing great, so just keep it up! thumb.gif
Bald_Bull's_Mama's Avatar Bald_Bull's_Mama 08:44 AM 05-18-2011

It seems to be getting better/easier for me to be still, though I don't feel like I'm as into the tracks. I do feel like I'm calmer and more relaxed overall, though. Maybe that's the difference. I was crabby yesterday and put on Joyful Pregnancy Affirmations while DS and I made pizza dough. It did help me mellow out and feel better.


cdeato's Avatar cdeato 09:05 AM 05-18-2011

I just did hypnobabies with my 2nd baby...she's now 10 weeks old. I used it because I had a very long labor with my first (65 hours) due to irritable uterus (which I know now, but my doc at the time didn't call it anything, so I wasn't able to research it). I had a lot of trouble with the hypnobabies practice too. At least you are turning your switch off! I would just move, and then be like, oh, I'm not supposed to be able to move...which really made me doubt the whole thing. And also, when they insist that you test your hypnosis by moving a finger or something, which I was always able to do. It all made me have serious doubt about how it would work for labor, which made it harder to practice....I would also fall asleep listening to the tracks, almost every time, so I guess relaxing wasn't my problem....but I would scratch my nose or whatever without thinking about it. I'm not sure it was entirely successful for me, but it did really help me with labor. I had a long labor like i did the first time (in the middle of it I figured out I probably should have been taking calcium supplements for the irritable uterus, but it was too late) and using hypnobabies really helped with that. I hired a doula who was training for HB and we practiced together, but in the end, I labored so long at home that by the time we got to the hospital everything went really quickly...the doula didn't do any scripts with me...I was like, "can someone play the hypnobabies CD or something" when I was pushing, but it kind of all went out the window. I did have an all natural birth. I did wish that there was a script for encouraging the placenta to deliver, because I requested no pitocin after delivery (which is pretty much standard...the docs want to get out of there) and my doc was pretty annoyed, waiting 1 1/2 hours for it to deliver. Good luck.


kawa kamuri's Avatar kawa kamuri 11:14 AM 05-18-2011

Honestly, unless my RLS is really bad that night and I end up bailing on the track I just move. I go with it. I don't fiddle with imaginary lightswitches much. I'm surely not a picture perfect Hypnobabies student but so far have benefited greatly from my practice throughout this pregnancy and the two previous pregnancies and births. 


Sudonk's Avatar Sudonk 01:04 PM 05-18-2011

I know this may sound odd, but what you are experiencing is actually a really good sign.  It is also the second most common question people ask about practicing Hypnobabies (after "Is it ok to fall asleep?").  I call it the "itching and twitching" stage of preparation, and am always glad to hear that my Hypnobabies students have reached that point, because it means they're doing their practice regularly and correctly.  Here is an FAQ link that explains more about why it happens and ways to handle it:

 

http://www.enjoybirth.com/faq-itchy.html

 

It happens almost every time for awhile in some cases, or only with a certain script for other people.  As long as you continue listening to the script all the way through, it won't interfere with your preparation at all.  That's the nice thing about using a self-hypnosis class instead of a guided relaxation class.  If you weren't able to relax while doing relaxation practice, that would be a bad sign.  But since you're listening to the scripts to allow your subconscious mind to absorb all the great post-hypnotic suggestions about birth, you can have a very successful practice session even on days when you're too tense or tired or fidgety to relax well. 


lahancock27's Avatar lahancock27 01:09 PM 05-18-2011

I would get very twitchy too when listening to the scripts, although I did not have RLS.  I agree with those that you might want to get your iron levels checked.  That seems to help a lot of people with RLS.

 

For me, once I had created my center switch, I just told myself that it was okay if I needed to move or itch...after a certain point while listening to the scripts, I would just fall asleep.  I always listened to my scripts at night time when I was going to bed because I work full time and had a two year old at the time.  I think once you are in your birthing time, if you choose to use the hypnosis, it will work very well. 


swimming-duck's Avatar swimming-duck 01:33 PM 05-18-2011


 

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sudonk View Post

I know this may sound odd, but what you are experiencing is actually a really good sign.  It is also the second most common question people ask about practicing Hypnobabies (after "Is it ok to fall asleep?").  I call it the "itching and twitching" stage of preparation, and am always glad to hear that my Hypnobabies students have reached that point, because it means they're doing their practice regularly and correctly.  Here is an FAQ link that explains more about why it happens and ways to handle it:

 

http://www.enjoybirth.com/faq-itchy.html

 

It happens almost every time for awhile in some cases, or only with a certain script for other people.  As long as you continue listening to the script all the way through, it won't interfere with your preparation at all.  That's the nice thing about using a self-hypnosis class instead of a guided relaxation class.  If you weren't able to relax while doing relaxation practice, that would be a bad sign.  But since you're listening to the scripts to allow your subconscious mind to absorb all the great post-hypnotic suggestions about birth, you can have a very successful practice session even on days when you're too tense or tired or fidgety to relax well. 



Wow. Thanks for that. The link was really interesting and made a lot of sense to me. It especially makes sense that it's a sign of deeper hypnosis as my worst restlessness occurs during the "Deepening" track. I pretty much have to stay in center during the entire track. But I now feel okay with that!


Bald_Bull's_Mama's Avatar Bald_Bull's_Mama 04:20 PM 05-18-2011

Wow, yes, that was a super helpful link! Off to poke around the faqs more.


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