need advice re: job interview - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 10 Old 11-19-2010, 03:31 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I have a job interview this morning.  I am laid off from my current job and my unemployment pay is almost nothing ($66/week).  I need to get out of the house before I go crazy and earn some money. I am about 6 weeks 3 days along and I usually start showing at about 4 months. Do I need to disclose that I am pregnant right now? I would feel kinda... dishonest I guess.  I would want to know if I was hiring someone who was pregnant- I know they can't discriminate but I would still feel like I was pulling a fast one on them.  Or shoudl I wait till I am 12 weeks? 

 


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#2 of 10 Old 11-19-2010, 03:59 AM
 
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I wouldn't tell them. Not until you're 12 weeks. They can't discriminate legally, but that doesn't mean they won't find excuses not to hire you over someone else.

 

I know what you mean about it feeling dishonest, though. I started a new job on October 25th (which was about 10 days into my cycle). DH and I had been trying to conceive for 6 months already. Turns out, I conceived that month (November 2nd would be my conception date). So I know when I tell them that I'm pregnant, there will be a bit of wondering whether I was already pregnant when I started. But I don't intend to tell them until I'm either 12 weeks or start to show, whichever comes first.


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#3 of 10 Old 11-19-2010, 06:51 AM
 
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I wouldn't.  Would you disclose another medical condition?  It's really none of their business, so long as you will be able to do the job. 

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#4 of 10 Old 11-19-2010, 07:05 AM
 
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forum crashing here..

 

Don't tell them.  Just because they can't discriminate doesn't mean they won't.  All they have to say is that another candidate seemed to be a better fit.  And, even if the hiring manager wouldn't conciously discriminate, that doesn't mean that it wouldn't subconsiously play into his/her decision. 

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#5 of 10 Old 11-19-2010, 07:12 AM
 
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Are you planning to continue working after maternity leave?

If you plan on taking your basic leave and returning right away then no need to tell them But if you plan on taking a really long time off or not returning or need special arrangements like bringing the baby then it might be best to disclose it to them.


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#6 of 10 Old 11-19-2010, 08:59 AM
 
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I would not tell during an interview.  Especially this early in the pregnancy!  After you get a job offer would be an appropriate time to disclose this news and discuss your plans for maternity leave/coming back to work.  (But even so I would wait till after the first trimester to bring ANYTHING up).

I understand that you don't want to be hiding anything, but there is absolutely no reason your pregnancy status should play into their decision to give you a job offer (unless some aspect of the job depends on your ability to get pregnant?  Nope, I didn't think sosmile.gif).

 

One thing to consider is that the FMLA act doesn't apply unless you've been employed for a year with a company.  So if you start work now, and then have a baby in July, they are not legally required to hold your job for you.

 

I was doing job interviews at 4 months pregnant with my son.  I actually started a new job 6 weeks before he was born!  Even though I was starting to show during the interviews I did not bring up the pregnancy until I got the job offer.


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#7 of 10 Old 11-19-2010, 09:29 AM
 
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I am a lawyer and dealt with the hiring process of a very pregnant woman when I worked in CHicago. We hired a law firm to tell us how to deal with her and they said: treat her like a man. So if they can not ask you, you do not need to tell!

I am in a situation that is quite embarrassing as well. I have been on 3 maternity leaves, each about one year long and told every one a month ago that we were so done having kids. Even though I have a great boss I am worried about the reaction. 

Besides that I was promised a raise and am afraid to disclose it before I have it in writing!

 

But my advice: do not tell them! There is no reason to!


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#8 of 10 Old 11-19-2010, 01:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you all!  The good news is, it is at a college and I woudl be off in the summer anyways- the bad news is, it doesn't pay enough for me to justify $90/day to put two kids in daycare, never mind a third when s/he comes along. Oh well, jobs are like streetcars.  another one will be along- maybe one that will allow me to work around my husband's schedule!

 


Thanks again!  And I agree- if they can't ask, no reason to bring it up. 


Kerri, mom to Doran  angel2.gif  (born still 7/6/05 at 33 weeks), Mairaed (11/16/07),  angel1.gif 11/15/08 at 10 weeks,  Kieran (11/2/09).   angel1.gif 1/11/11 at 15 weeks
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#9 of 10 Old 11-19-2010, 06:29 PM
 
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They definitely cannot ask.  It just depends if you can deal with quitting on them when you're ready to take maternity leave.  You must be realistic if you have to answer the "can you fulfill the obligations of this position" question (if it comes up).  I was at a company that hired someone & was asked if they would be able to work overtime regularly.  She said yes & was already pregnant at the time, though we did not know it.  She ended up being fired b/c she could not work overtime even though she otherwise did her job well.  You should definitely go for the interview & do your best. 


"Unthinking respect for authority is the greatest enemy of truth."- Albert Einstein

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#10 of 10 Old 11-20-2010, 06:48 AM
 
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I wouldn't tell :) It's basically none of their business. Even if I was huge and round, are they going to be *that* person and ask a lady "Are you pregnant?"

 

It's none of their business. period. (pregnancy hormones + raging feminism = following comment) Women get the shaft in the workplace. Because we have kids, if Men had children too, it would be an expected event to take a year off after the baby was born. But it's easier to just not hire women, keep them in lower paying positions etc, That way when the eventually pop out 7 or 8 kids, they will just stay at home, and let the men go to work.

 

I am a nanny and my 'kid' is going to FT school next year and I should be looking for another job in JUNE, when I am due in mid July. I really don't know what I am going to do about all that. Except ask DH to work more, so I can stay home with my kids rant.gif


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