Anyone else tired of being told "Oh you don't look pregnant!"?
Every single time I talk about being pregnant to someone new it's the same reaction. Oh I can't tell you are pregnant, or where's your belly? Or 22 weeks, really you look like you just a had a big lunch. THE WORST (possibly triggering): You should ask for another ultrasound because what if the baby is dead. WHO THE HELL SAYS THAT?!!!!
I have a belly. I do! I'm in maternity jeans because my pants don't fit. The baby is measuring large for goodness sakes! Two or three times when this has happened I was wearing a bikini, so I know it's not because my clothes are too voluminous. I swear if it weren't for my mom and hubby who keep me sane by exclaiming how much I've popped I'd go kooky! I am obsessive about making sure I can feel him squirm around inside me, just because that dang seed of doubt has been planted in my head. ARRRGH
Is anyone else in this boat with me?
Ignore it, don't worry. Everyone carries differently and some people just don't get that and can't keep their comments to themselves! It is never respectful to comment on anyone's body, and most people have that basic filter in place...but pregnant women just seem to bring out the verbal diarrhea in some people.
Um...I could have written your post! I'm 24w 3d with my 5th child and exactly one week ago I had someone tell me she would never have known I was pregnant. Really! I can't tell you how many people have said "how tiny" I am or that I don't even look pregnant. So, what...I just look fat! And the worst is when I say that, yes, I've gained 14 lbs. now and they say, "you don't look like you've gained anything". But yes, I do, please don't say things that aren't true! Otherwise I'll assume you think you thought I looked this fat before I got pregnant and gosh darn it, I actually thought I looked pretty good before I got pregnant. Not that I don't look good now, but if I wasn't pregnant, then NO, I wouldn't be looking good, I'd be looking very fat. I have a nice round belly and I'm getting tired of hearing that I don't look pregnant.
DDCC - YES! (Though, srsly, WHO in their right mind says to go get an u/s??? Really?) I work in scrubs and I look totally pg. I mean, it's obvious. The last few clients I've had though, when I tell them I'm almost 5 months along, they're like, whaaa? I couldn't even tell! No really, thanks for telling me I just look fat. Srsly. Thanks. UGH!
Carrie SAHM to Nora Caitlyn ('08) and Finnley Dax ('11) homebirthing, breastfeeding, babywearing, intactivist, doula mama!
Holy crap! Who says that? That is seriously effed up. I'm sorry that happened to you- I am sure you look fantastic and whoever said that is just awful.
Lisa, Mama to two 2-26-09 and 6-15-11
"Hey baby, do you like trains?"
That is SOOOOOO crazy!!!! Cannot believe that someone would say that! Honestly though, I get the opposite. Someone said to me, "are you SURE you're only 20 weeks? You look a lot bigger than that!" Ummmmm, thank you very much. And during my last pregnancy, I was preggo along with my bosses daughter and she was 2 months ahead of me. She'd constantly say, "Erica is teeny compared to you!" uh... wow, really?
I think people need to say nothing but, "you look absolutely amazing". End of story.
Tracy, mama to Mia Elizabeth10~4~06 and Baby Ava Elise 8~6~11
Some people just feel the need to say something hurtful in oder to hurt somebody else (I think to gain power over that person). I really try hard (and it is HARD) to think that this person has probably not made many friends, a painful life and a lot of anger in them.
Sometimes I just go off on people, too, if a rude fellow gets me at the wrong moment.
People have told me a lot of times that the vaccines did not cause the death of my baby, without knowing the circumstances, that something must have been wrong with him, or that they support that the police and the courts investigated. They must know that this hurts me.
Anyway, I am in the exact opposite situation. I get the: you must deliver tomorrow or you will burst!
Feel good about your belly, you might have a chance to look decent in a bikini afterwards whereas I am forever in a bathing suit!
Barbara, Mama to Isabel (06/2004), Jake (08/2006-03/2007), Noah (01/2008), and Matteo (07/2011)
Please always research the safety of vaccines even if your doctor tells you they are harmless!
Yes, I get told I don't look pregnant quite often but, I know in all honesty, people really don't pay that much attention to me! I think they're just looking for ways to start a conversation with me and really suck at it!!! This is the most weight I've gain with any of my 5 children and my last child was 9lbs, 4ozs. Most times people are really just comparing you to themselves, anyways!
Wow! That is crazy! I can't imagine what I would say if someone said that to me. I would probably just cry. How horrible.
Is this your first pregnancy? I didn't show until I was around 25 weeks or so with my first. It just looked like I was getting chubby. Now I have the opposite problem. I look huge by 10 weeks. By 20 weeks I hear "any day now" which makes me want to jump off a bridge. It's like I know I'm huge okay! Leave me alone!
Mom to (12), (7), (5), (4), (born 7/8/11), , and
I am with you! I have gained 20 lb. at least at 24 weeks and I am normally on the smaller side. I have a big belly. Two people the other day said they had no idea I was pregnant. I wanted to say "so you think I have just gotten fat?" I was at a training with two pregnant women that people were gushing over and asking all sorts of pregnancy questions. No one said a thing to me. Again, can't see that my belly is round and big?