Things to expect after you give birth, for the new mom - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 57 Old 07-13-2011, 03:56 PM
 
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Oh man, I had forgotten so many of these things! And my DS is only 14 months old! The sweating... ugh. I also remember literally feeling like my insides were going to fall out post partum. I'd hold my stomach when I was walking around. Binding really helped. Did anyone mention blood clots? I remember peeing a few hours after the birth and a clot the size of a tennis ball came out.

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#32 of 57 Old 07-13-2011, 08:25 PM
 
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Oh man, my youngest is 5. I have forgotten about so much of this... the sweating, my god, the sweating! The clots that come out after wards are epic. I remember the doctor saying to call if they were larger than a lemon. I passed one the size of a large lemon and called and they said it was in the range of normal. So be prepared. 

 

I am pretty sure that my abs have separated this time and from you ladies who have been through this, I am wondering what is the best belly binder? From what I have seen they are pretty pricey so, I am hoping to get a good one on the first purchase. 


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#33 of 57 Old 07-14-2011, 07:11 AM
 
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I was totally unprepared for the hormones.  I had a c-section and about two days after, it was the middle of the night and I was in the rocking chair nursing but I still needed help to get up when I was holding the baby.  I was calling for DH in the bed but he was so exhausted he just wouldn't wake up.  I'm stuck in the chair, exhausted and DH is sleeping like an angel right through it all.  I started to cry and scream at him.  I was telling him to get out because if I had to do this as a single mom then I might as well be a single mom.  I was completely irrational.  He just didn't hear me because he had also not slept in days. Having never experienced really strong PMS symptoms I didn't realize that it wasn't me talking but the hormones.  Needless to say he stuck around and we are expecting number two but I was an absolute wreck.  It took a few weeks to calm down. It wasn't PPD but the mood swings were crazy!  

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#34 of 57 Old 07-14-2011, 08:25 AM
 
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I am pretty sure that my abs have separated this time and from you ladies who have been through this, I am wondering what is the best belly binder? From what I have seen they are pretty pricey so, I am hoping to get a good one on the first purchase.


I haven't done belly binding yet, but...My understanding is that they all work about the same, so IMO the pricey ones are not worth the money. I've heard of people using large Ace bandages from the drugstore and it working just fine. Lots of people use a rebozo, which is basically just a long sheet. You just want something to wrap tightly around your belly that is soft and preferably stretchy. I got a cheap abdominal binder ($19 I think) and if that's uncomfortable I'll probably just tie a piece of fabric around me. Come to think of it, a
Moby baby wrap would probably work great. lol.gif
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#35 of 57 Old 07-14-2011, 10:49 AM
 
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Oh man, my youngest is 5. I have forgotten about so much of this... the sweating, my god, the sweating! The clots that come out after wards are epic. I remember the doctor saying to call if they were larger than a lemon. I passed one the size of a large lemon and called and they said it was in the range of normal. So be prepared. 

 

I am pretty sure that my abs have separated this time and from you ladies who have been through this, I am wondering what is the best belly binder? From what I have seen they are pretty pricey so, I am hoping to get a good one on the first purchase. 


This is the one I got: http://www.amazon.com/Gabrialla-Breathable-Elastic-Abdominal-Binder/dp/B000WFT3II/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1310665638&sr=8-1

 

Honestly, it was aweful. I got it because I didn't want to spend a bunch. It was impossible to velcro it in a way where the corner of the velcro didn't rub on me and cause red marks. It was very irritating. This time I'll just wrap tightly with something soft (like a piece of a sheet), or invest in a more expensive binder.

 

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#36 of 57 Old 07-14-2011, 05:04 PM
 
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I had a diastasis too, and when I got pregnant again I still had a 1-finger gap despite being in really great shape and having really strong abs! This time I'm doing some belly binding for sure (did not last time) and as for exercises, look up the Tupler Technique--it is what helped me get the muscles *almost* back together before I got pregnant again. (This time I also hope to not get pregnant again so soon--lol!)

I also thought of one more thing for this thread-- around 3-4 months postpartum, your hair might start falling out in huge clumps in the shower! This is because during pregnancy, you stop producing the hormone that makes your hair fall out at a normal rate, even though your hair keeps growing. Which is why your hair gets so thick and lustrous. But once your hormones all start going back to normal, all that extra hair you grew starts falling out. I've heard for some people it's a more gradual thing, so they don't really notice, but for me it all started falling out at once and kind of freaked me out! But don't worry if it happens to you--eventually your hair will even out and be normal again. Here's an article about it: http://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancyhealth/hairloss.html


Just butting in here wink1.gif ~ I wanted to mention that with my 1st, it seemed like ALL of my extra pregnancy hair fell out in one weekend about 3 months after ds was born. I was devastated. I thought I was going bald. Handfuls of hair fell out at a time. I made an appointment with my doctor and was crying in the waiting room (crazy pp hormones!) and a nurse had to come and comfort me and assure me that it was normal and I wasn't going to go completely bald. I was prepared to have a jiggly belly and mood swings, but I never expected the hair loss. It wasn't quite as bad with ds#2 - more of a gradual thing. Interestingly, my doctor gave me B12 vitamins at that appointment. Not sure if that was to help the hair loss or just to give me something so I'd stop crying, haha! 

 

Crazy what we go through for our little ones, eh?

 

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#37 of 57 Old 07-14-2011, 08:41 PM
 
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Speaking of baby poops, the 1st BM for you postpartum can be quite an event as well.

Make sure to drink lot's of water and eat fiber to help with an easier 1st BM.

It's not just a physical event, but it can be mentally trying too. I remember I was a bit scared that I was going to hurt something.

 

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#38 of 57 Old 07-14-2011, 10:25 PM
 
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I agree with the pad over the c-sections incision site!  Nobody told me that, so I had to figure it out on my own.  And, boy, does it help, so the stitches/steri strips do not rub on the waste of your pants or underwear.

 

Also, the most important thing I learned that I did not know ahead of time, is that, for the first three days, you cannot put that baby down because it it nursing the entire time!  Especially day 3, when the milk is starting to come in, that baby will nurse constantly!  Do not give up, keep on keeping on, and drink a full glass of fluids every time you nurse!

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#39 of 57 Old 07-15-2011, 11:26 AM
 
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Great idea for a post, though I would imagine it could be pretty scary to those who haven't "been there, done that" just yet.

 

My son is 19 months and I still have joint pain (wrists, hips, knees, and ankles) that started in my third trimester.  I didn't realize the aches and pains you endure while pregnant might last for years (or, dare I say, forever?).

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#40 of 57 Old 07-15-2011, 01:45 PM
 
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Great idea for a post, though I would imagine it could be pretty scary to those who haven't "been there, done that" just yet.

 

My son is 19 months and I still have joint pain (wrists, hips, knees, and ankles) that started in my third trimester.  I didn't realize the aches and pains you endure while pregnant might last for years (or, dare I say, forever?).



Oh yeah! (It's amazing how quickly we forget...)

 

I had severe pain and I could hardly walk straight. A chiropractor fixed it, though! 


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#41 of 57 Old 07-15-2011, 06:29 PM
 
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I still have a sick-to-my-stomach feeling every time DS nurses. It used to last for longer but now it's just a few seconds. I don't know how common this is, but I could hardly eat for the first month or so postpartum. I had lots of fruit and little meals. 

 

 

 

D-MER! I had this with my first two babies but not with my third...I felt so alone but I was relieved when DS2 was born I found many others on Mothering with the same "issue". Before that all anybody would say is "you're probably depressed" and that just didn't sit well with me as to the reason. Anyway, just thought I'd chime in!! 

 

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#42 of 57 Old 07-17-2011, 02:07 PM
 
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Oh man the night sweats!!! For about 3 months there was a ME shaped wet spot on the bed every morning I woke up.


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#43 of 57 Old 07-18-2011, 02:24 PM
 
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The most shocking things no one told me was... I think the pelvic floor muscles weakening and having less bladder control, leaking and not being able to control gas for a while. It took pelvic floor exercise to get some muscle tone and strength back 'down there'. Yes, it got better but almost a year later now those muscles still feel weak and if I have a full bladder or have eaten less fiber then I can still feel pressure there. I remember watching Dr Oz on TV and the topic was something like 'secrets most women never tell' and this postpartum pelvic floor issue was one of them. And I was most shocked with the repair surgery option... that the results are TEMPORARY... and similar to the upkeep of a face lift in that it only lasts for a few years and then it's necessary to get 'the repair' again. My Dr said it's like a screen that gradually sags and needs to be tightened after a few years. And the other shocking thing I never knew was the possibility of abdominal muscle separation... my tummy that was once flat and had a cute "inny-button" now has a saggy look to the muscles no matter how much I exercise. I thought being petite pre-pregnancy and not gaining more than the recommended weight in pregnancy also meant I'd for sure return to my pre-pregnant barbie shape with diet and exercise... WRONG! While I regained my petite frame and physique, my tummy refuses to pull those separated muscles back together, the belly button pouches OUT and when I laugh I still piddle and it's a year postpartum. But so worth it and I'd totally do it all over again for my sweet pea! 

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#44 of 57 Old 07-18-2011, 09:18 PM
 
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It is possible to feel "touched out" after a full night, day, night, day of baby loves and smuggles. So when your DP gets home and wants a hug, you don't really want one. What you really want is ten minutes with nobody touching you, preferably in a hot bath or a soft bed. It is okay to want to set baby down for a minute or two.

Also, it can be hard to adjust to your "mama body". Certain parts, like your belly, hips, and boobs, may never be quite the same. But if you save a little money to buy some new clothing post partum, you will feel just as fabulous as you did before. The big secret is never try to get into your pre pregnancy clothing imedatly post partum. Buy new stuff and wait a few months before you give it a shot. Consignment shops are your friend!

Some boobs leak a lot. Like a drippy faucet. Patterned clothing hides nursing pads. And when you feel ready to DTD have a towel handy. The big O triggers a letdown for some women, and your DP may not be prepared to be squirted or dripped on.

If you get stitches for tears, they itch like fire when they start to heal. Ice and sitz baths are your friends.

Your feet may be a bit bigger PP. Like a half size. Or a little wider. Some shoes you loved before may not fit correctly anymore.

Those prenatals you are tired of taking? If you are nursing you will be taking them for awhile more. If you do extended nursing your friends will wonder if you are TTC when they see the giant bottle of prenatals in the cabinet. Buy good ones, they really do help how well you feel.

Finally, in addition to changing your hair thickness, babies can affect your hair texture and style. Before my first, my hair was wavy. After my first, it was straight as a board. My second has turned my hair curly. Crazy!

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#45 of 57 Old 07-19-2011, 05:33 PM
 
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how do you know pre-birth whether or not your abs have separated?

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#46 of 57 Old 07-19-2011, 05:49 PM
 
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The absolute WORST for me was the pain while urinating. that has really got to be the worst thing out of the whole experience IMO. I would just sit on the toilet crying because it hurt so bad.. stuck inbetween having to pee extremely bad and not peeing just so I wouldn't feel the pain. aghhhh!! Thinking about it almost makes me not want another one. ALMOST. lol eyesroll.gif


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#47 of 57 Old 07-19-2011, 08:02 PM
 
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Hmmmm... This is a great thread.
Surprises I was hit with:
A milky mess every night so had to sleep on towels.
Crazy night sweats for a couple of weeks... One way that your body eliminates excess water.
Healing meant constantly changing frozen witch hazel saturated pads and walking slowly.
Feeling the annoying tickle and tug of the stitches.
Soreness when I laughed too hard or sneezed.
The anxt about my first bm.

I guess I was surprised by many things! smile.gif. Good reflecting.
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#48 of 57 Old 07-19-2011, 09:06 PM
 
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Great idea for a post, though I would imagine it could be pretty scary to those who haven't "been there, done that" just yet.


I just wanted to point out, before anyone gets totally freaked out about this thread, that not everything listed here is going to happen to any one person! Most of the experiences listed here did not happen to me. Everyone's got different issues, so don't let this whole cumulative collection of things worry you!
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#49 of 57 Old 07-19-2011, 09:15 PM
 
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how do you know pre-birth whether or not your abs have separated?


I don't think there is any way to really tell once you're this far along and your belly is just big and hard and full of baby. But when you're not pregnant (and for me, up until about the second trimester of this pregnancy I could tell) the way you feel the separation is to lie on your back with your knees bent, take a deep breath and as you exhale, pull your belly button to your spine and lift just your head off the ground. If there's a separation you can clearly feel it in that position, and actually stick your fingers between the muscles into your abdomen!

If you do end up with a separation, it's very important after you give birth to use your breathing to pull things back together--always pull your abs in towards your spine when you exhale, especially when lifting anything, and never ever do a sit-up type of "jackknife" motion until you're sure the separation is healed. Sit-ups can make a separation much worse! I really can't recommend the Tupler Technique enough--there's a book called "Losing Your Mummy Tummy" that's full of great exercises and info.
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#50 of 57 Old 07-20-2011, 05:51 AM
 
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I just wanted to point out, before anyone gets totally freaked out about this thread, that not everything listed here is going to happen to any one person! Most of the experiences listed here did not happen to me. Everyone's got different issues, so don't let this whole cumulative collection of things worry you!


Very true.  I didn't experience sweating this time, which I thought was really weird because I was retaining so much water at the end.

 


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#51 of 57 Old 07-20-2011, 10:57 AM
 
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I just wanted to point out, before anyone gets totally freaked out about this thread, that not everything listed here is going to happen to any one person! Most of the experiences listed here did not happen to me. Everyone's got different issues, so don't let this whole cumulative collection of things worry you!


Thanks for saying that. Pre birth I avoided this thread as to not get freaked out... But now... post birth... hahaha I feel like I've got a few thoughts on the matter!!! :) I guess I'll just throw out there I'm a little surprised at how swollen I am, while it is not that painful really, it's just a really odd sensation. Poor vagina got a helluva workout.


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#52 of 57 Old 07-20-2011, 11:58 AM
 
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Blood. Lots of it. And clots. I wear Depends for the first 3-4 days because overnight pads just don't cut it. I also put a plastic $1 shower curtain liner on the bed with an old sheet on top, and it comes off 2 days postpartum when I stop leaking out of everything.

Pee. You really need to pee regularly for the uterus to shrink down well. If you have stitches, something like a toilet paper roll or guitar slide works well to keep the stream away.

You need a peri bottle. Everyone needs a peri bottle. So much better than wiping, and it cleans the whole area which can get kind of messy.

As for postpartum belly binding, I tried a surgical wrap, bandages, etc... And then I found an old tank top in my drawer. It was from Walmart, and it was just one of those that makes your waist skinnier. It fit at three days postpartum and felt great.

Afterpains get worse with each child. This time around I started 800mg Rx ibuprofin as soon as the placenta was out. If I missed a dose, contractions were worse than labor and lasted 2+ minutes.

I also start generic stool softeners as soon as I give birth, for the first week or so. No one wants to cook, so we eat a lot of fast food or whatever is easy the first week...

I think everything else has been covered smile.gif

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#53 of 57 Old 07-20-2011, 02:04 PM
 
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Thanks for saying that. Pre birth I avoided this thread as to not get freaked out... But now... post birth... hahaha I feel like I've got a few thoughts on the matter!!! :) I guess I'll just throw out there I'm a little surprised at how swollen I am, while it is not that painful really, it's just a really odd sensation. Poor vagina got a helluva workout.


This is EXACTLY what I was going to say. I can't believe how swollen I was! I had heard people talk about swelling but I don't think it really sunk in that everything would swell down there - labia and all.

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#54 of 57 Old 07-20-2011, 06:43 PM
 
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If you have stitches, something like a toilet paper roll or guitar slide works well to keep the stream away.
 


Holy crap you are like a post partum Mcguyver. lol.gif That is genius! I wish I had known that!

 

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#55 of 57 Old 07-21-2011, 09:00 AM
 
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This is EXACTLY what I was going to say. I can't believe how swollen I was! I had heard people talk about swelling but I don't think it really sunk in that everything would swell down there - labia and all.


So speaking of this swelling.... how long is it supposed to last? It's been 3 days here and it feels the same. Never had such a swell-a-thon.


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#56 of 57 Old 07-22-2011, 12:15 PM
 
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This is EXACTLY what I was going to say. I can't believe how swollen I was! I had heard people talk about swelling but I don't think it really sunk in that everything would swell down there - labia and all.


So speaking of this swelling.... how long is it supposed to last? It's been 3 days here and it feels the same. Never had such a swell-a-thon.


Mine went down after six days... Even with ice. Went down faster with the other two kids even though they were bigger (go figure).

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#57 of 57 Old 07-29-2011, 03:41 PM
 
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I wanted to mention that I just took a class relating to both of these issues and how to exercies these muscles.  You can look it up online.  I think it's called the tummy team with the tupler technique (should pop up on google search).  Anyway, some of the ladies in the class were having great results with getting the two sides of the abdomen to come back to the center again, and they talked about techniques to exercise the pelvic floor.  There were a couple ladies that had incontinence issue that were resolved.  One lady had a lot of back pain and couldn't lay flat and she said that was resolved, I didn't notice too much difference but mine wasn't so bad. 

The more interesting things I learned was that crunches and exercises were your guts are being pressed into the back of your abdominal wall stretch those sides apart and don't help mummy tummy.  (and they showed pictures of peoples with six packs that had the same issues from there workouts).  The best exercises they taught in the class are too difficult to describe (have to do mostly with breathing techniques) I think but they involve tightening the muscles that go around your front which will help your back muscles not do as much.  And they also showed proper ways of picking things off the floor, getting out of bed, all the things that you do without thinking about.

Anyway , you might want to check it out.  I'm going to try to stay on top of it with this next LO.. Congrats on your LO!
 

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Originally Posted by JoieB View Post

The most shocking things no one told me was... I think the pelvic floor muscles weakening and having less bladder control, leaking and not being able to control gas for a while. It took pelvic floor exercise to get some muscle tone and strength back 'down there'. Yes, it got better but almost a year later now those muscles still feel weak and if I have a full bladder or have eaten less fiber then I can still feel pressure there. I remember watching Dr Oz on TV and the topic was something like 'secrets most women never tell' and this postpartum pelvic floor issue was one of them. And I was most shocked with the repair surgery option... that the results are TEMPORARY... and similar to the upkeep of a face lift in that it only lasts for a few years and then it's necessary to get 'the repair' again. My Dr said it's like a screen that gradually sags and needs to be tightened after a few years. And the other shocking thing I never knew was the possibility of abdominal muscle separation... my tummy that was once flat and had a cute "inny-button" now has a saggy look to the muscles no matter how much I exercise. I thought being petite pre-pregnancy and not gaining more than the recommended weight in pregnancy also meant I'd for sure return to my pre-pregnant barbie shape with diet and exercise... WRONG! While I regained my petite frame and physique, my tummy refuses to pull those separated muscles back together, the belly button pouches OUT and when I laugh I still piddle and it's a year postpartum. But so worth it and I'd totally do it all over again for my sweet pea! 



 

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