Thanks, everyone. It's true what Trabot said, I am surprised by how sad I am about her dying. That sounds horrible to say, but it's the degree of sadness I am surprised about, not that I am sad. I find myself really wishing that she were alive right now. I feel like it's really not right that she is dead, and it was all a big, cosmic mistake, but it's too late to fix it. I know I'm not explaining it very well.
Anyway, the wake is tomorrow - I hate wakes, but there's no way I can go to the funeral because it's on Monday and I have nobody to watch Cole while I'm there. So, I guess I should go to the wake. I am the only one from the bookstore (besides the owner and his wife, who are out of town) who even knew her, so I kind of have to go, now that I think about it.
Sorry to ramble on. I just keep thinking about her, though. I know what I am feeling is nothing compared to what her parents and fiance are feeling. I am just having a hard time getting my head around it. No reply necessary - thanks for reading this far.