Friend/employee in a coma/on life support - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 7 Old 08-27-2010, 01:28 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I need advice on how to handle this. I usually trust fate and instinct to guide me through, and in this case I feel that I might should just let fate take care of it. MD is 21, she was shot in the neck Tuesday afternoon while sitting in her car in a not so good neighborhood. She and her boyfriend, also M, have been together since high school, roughly 6 years. They have had a rocky time the last few months, he took all the furniture and left, there may have been violence from both sides, lots of screaming arguments, cell phones thrown from cars and more than a few reconciliations. They have worked for us off and on over the last 3 years, she was to resume nursing school next week. They also have their own "business" on the side, selling pot. Anyway, her family is not happy with him right now, due to their crazy break ups and make ups over the last few months, and as well, they believe that the bullets were meant for him, not her. We don't live in a crazy, gang ridden city where people are killing each other left and right over territory or anything, BTW, so this was kind of shocking. My issue is this, her family will not let him up to see her, and it is breaking my heart, because I am absolutely sure, that though she is in a coma and on life support- she would want him there more than anyone. I don't know the family that well, I talked to the grandmother today and suggested we consider a reward fund to get information. These people want information and they think the boyfriend has it. I am thinking that if they let him see her, then maybe he will be more forthright w/ any info he might have- I mean that when he sees the state that she's in, he will also want there to be justice. Or should I just leave it alone and see if it works out on it's own. I don't know for how long they will keep her on life support, I don't know if the coma is induced. An EMT who was on the scene told a friend of ours that he really did not think she would make it. She is going to go and M will never see her again. Should I gently suggest that they let him see her and that maybe it will help get some answers? Or is it out of my hands? I am heartbroken.

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#2 of 7 Old 08-27-2010, 01:35 AM
 
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no answers for you, but

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and my sweet baby, born July 12  babygirl.gif

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#3 of 7 Old 08-27-2010, 04:15 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I've decided to call the family and make a plea for him.

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#4 of 7 Old 08-31-2010, 04:36 PM
 
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How is your friend doing? s
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#5 of 7 Old 09-04-2010, 12:55 PM
 
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I am a 40 year old unschooling, belly dancing, artist-mama of one almost 8 year old. I just had brain surgery and blogging.jpg about it a bit because it's just so surreal.
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#6 of 7 Old 09-04-2010, 04:15 PM - Thread Starter
 
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She passed away when they removed life support. I am having a hard time with this, we missed both the calling hours and the funeral. However the boyfriend did get to see her a few times before she passed. and that was most important. My (stbx) H should have been there. But I think he couldn't handle it and did what he had to do to avoid it. I am going to go to the cemetery during the week and say good bye. With out with out him.

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#7 of 7 Old 09-04-2010, 06:31 PM
 
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I'm so sorry Samantha
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