I also, could not read this without posting. Guilt is a dangerous and scary thing. I can not claim to know how you feel, and I would never tell you to feel differently. I've lost two to miscarriage, but I know it does not compare. I wanted to thank you for sharing your story. I want to thank you for being the strong woman that you are, even if you may not always feel that way. I know I will think of you and your family often, both now and in the future. I just wanted to reach out to you and say, maybe, instead of feeling like you don't deserve another child, maybe, this baby girl you are bringing into the world is a GIFT from your daughter and son, because they love you, because they see your pain, and because they want to give you hope. Perhaps, it is their way of telling you that they are okay, and they'd like you to live with as much happiness as you possibly can.
Hugs to you.