I don't even know what to write here. My very very dear friend ended her life Thursday. We met on here and spent a lot of time together with our very tight knit MDC mama group. We did play dates and moms night out and joint birthday parties. Her, another friend, and I all had babies born within a 2 week period. We had a birthday party for our "3 musketeers" for their 1st, 2nd, and 3rd birthdays. We were super close often spending time on the phone or emailing about any issues. She was so so brilliant and always done up and put together. She was funny and a true friend.
She took her life less then a week after her baby turned 3 and a few weeks before her firstborn turns 6. I have no idea the horrible pain she must have been in to do this. That is the worst of it.
I am so so very sad for her children. She was a good mama.
I am wondering if anyone has gone through this, a mother leaving like this. I can't wrap my brain around it. I just wish i could hug her one more time and i wish us loving her had been enough to quell her pain.
Thank you for your prayers and good thoughts. Our little group is so close and has had much trauma the last year. I am so glad we have each other.
Every time i hold my son that is the same age as hers i feel such a pain in my heart. :(
I am so sorry for your loss. May I suggest writing a letter about all of your wonderful memories of her, and giving it to the children when they are adults.
I think this is a great idea. I'm so sorry for your loss and will keep her family and your group of friends in my thoughts and prayers in the coming weeks.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost one of my best friends to suicide last summer and it is so immensely painful. One friend advised me to try take some time to myself every day to think about it....like to try to go for a walk in the woods for 15 minutes, or take a bath. It is so hard to grieve while caring for young children, and if you don't spend some time processing your emotions they can really boil over.
My heart goes out to you and to her poor family.
SAHM to 6.5yo DS and 4yo DD. PCOS with two early m/cs. Married 8 yrs. Certified birth doula, writer, editor.
Some stuff I like:
We are all getting the pics we have of her together to make a photobook for her kids. I was also thinking of printing all the comments on her FB and the memorial page to make a little book with too.
that is terribly sad. i'm so sorry. (i don't know if it's in poor taste to forum crash but i clicked the thread from the main page and then i couldn't read and not post.) i think your ideas for honoring her and helping her kids remember her are very generous and also sound like a good way to spend time with your memories of her. i will keep you, rach & the family in my prayers.
Thank you. The memorial is tomorrow. I just wish i could see her and hug her one more time. I keep remembering all these things we were supposed to do together in the next few weeks/months.
I don't know if I'll be coherent or say anything useful but one of my bff's committed suicide in October. She had a 5 month old baby and was suffering from severe postpartum depression. I really don't even know what to say. I scrolled through her facebook page today just searching for something. Some sign. Some note that she'd written that would remind me her. Let me hear her "voice" again. I have struggled and struggled to make sense of this. I suffer from severe depression (have all my life) so I know the kind of the pain she must have been in. It doesn't really help. I wish I knew what to say to you. I'm so sorry. I'm so so so sorry. I know it doesn't really help but I'm sorry. Feel free to PM me or reply if you think it would help. I wish I could think of something better to say. Tonight has been really hard for me.
It is really hard. I am sorry for your loss too :( The good thing is, we have a tight knit group of friends who all loved her and we can get through this together. I miss her so much and think of her daily.
I am truly sorry. This May was the 5 year anniversary of the suicide of one of our good friends, a parent of two aged 7 and 11 at the time of death. My heart still hurts for the pain she was in and the pain her children have gone through since her death.
Honor her by being honest, doing the things she couldn't, reaching out. She isn't hurting anymore but her actions have caused so many others to hurt but you knew her to be a good mother, she had to have thought you would all be better without her. It isn't true, but she didn't know that else she wouldn't have done what she did. She couldn't see reality and she didn't show any of you the one hell she was living in inside her. You now have to forgive her. Forgive yourself for not being a mind reader as didn't show you the pain, she didn't, and you have to believe that truth.
Be honest when your hurting. It is a brave and hard thing to do. If others see you doing it, they might be able to and that might save more mothers from the lies that they are alone in this.
Your not alone. I am sorry for your pain.
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