Lost our twin boys at 22 weeks- Delivering tonight - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 13 Old 03-23-2012, 10:55 AM - Thread Starter
 
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We found out at our follow-up anatomy scan yesterday that our identical twin boys passed away. I will be delivering them sometime tonight. I don't have much else to say right now. I am still in a fog, but thought this would be a good place for support.


Mama to my twin butterfly boys, Alan and Bruce, who passed away at 22 weeks gestation (3/24/12): Forever in Our Hearts. Our rainbow baby girl, my little bud of Hope,  joined our butterfly boys and Grandma Jan 1/31/13 at 9 weeks gestation. Love you so much. Next step: triadadopt.jpg
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#2 of 13 Old 03-23-2012, 11:14 AM
 
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I'm so sorry Deborah. Hugs and strength.


Mama to one 9yo Dancing Boy

My Blog - http://luminousfire.blogspot.com/

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#3 of 13 Old 03-23-2012, 11:17 AM
 
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So very, very sorry for your loss. :(

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#4 of 13 Old 03-24-2012, 06:44 AM
 
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Thinking of you!

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#5 of 13 Old 03-24-2012, 05:40 PM
 
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Much love and prayers coming your way.

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#6 of 13 Old 03-27-2012, 06:24 AM
 
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I am also thinking of you.  We also lost twins, at the end of the first trimester.  Come back or PM if you want to talk.


Mom to DS, born fall 05 after ,,, wife/best friend to DH We have
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#7 of 13 Old 03-27-2012, 06:30 AM
 
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thinking of you hug2.gif


Mama to DD(4) energy.gif&  DS baby.gif

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#8 of 13 Old 03-27-2012, 07:30 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi- I am home now. I got home Sunday night after a long labor that included a very high fever and 2 episodes of vomiting. The boys were delivered Saturday at 1:00 p.m. and approximately 2:30 p.m. (I don't have the records yet- this is just what my mom told me). We named them post-mortem: Alan for Baby A and Bruce for Baby B. Alan came first and I held him for a while. I had a short break between the boys and then I held Bruce for a while. He had clearly passed first and was well under-developed. That night when my husband went to pick up my brother, I held the boys together while my mom took some pictures. Earlier, the grief and loss coordinator had arranged for many pictures that she will put together in an album for us. The hospital did all they could to keep me comfortable and to help us memorialize them. I will probably check in again in a few days, but am only going online a little bit right now.


Mama to my twin butterfly boys, Alan and Bruce, who passed away at 22 weeks gestation (3/24/12): Forever in Our Hearts. Our rainbow baby girl, my little bud of Hope,  joined our butterfly boys and Grandma Jan 1/31/13 at 9 weeks gestation. Love you so much. Next step: triadadopt.jpg
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#9 of 13 Old 03-27-2012, 08:28 AM
 
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Deborah - I am glad to hear you could hold your boys and get pictures to remember them by. I'm still so sad that they aren't still in you, growing and kicking. I tear up just thinking about you and your boys. I hope you are doing okay with the physical recovery - it sounds like it was pretty rough on your body. If you don't mind, I'll probably link to this thread on the IF threads, in case people haven't seen your updates over here. I think we all understand you don't want to have to repeat this story over and over. hug.gif


Monkey (30) + Pirate (28) = a forever family (5/10) - Baby Bird (8/12), our long-awaited first, and one (9/13 @ 7w 6d); PCOS
*4***8***12***16***20***24******32***36***40** Oct 2014
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#10 of 13 Old 03-27-2012, 09:46 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Monkey- That would be just fine. Thank you.


Mama to my twin butterfly boys, Alan and Bruce, who passed away at 22 weeks gestation (3/24/12): Forever in Our Hearts. Our rainbow baby girl, my little bud of Hope,  joined our butterfly boys and Grandma Jan 1/31/13 at 9 weeks gestation. Love you so much. Next step: triadadopt.jpg
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#11 of 13 Old 03-27-2012, 07:22 PM
 
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Deborah, I'm so terribly heartbroken for you. I can't imagine your suffering. I'm sure you were grateful for the chance to hold Alan and Bruce. And, the photos will be so important as you go through this grieving process. I hope the loss counselor will be available to you and your DH when needed over the next few weeks/months. Sending you lots of love and peace.
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#12 of 13 Old 03-28-2012, 06:54 PM
 
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Deborah - I'm glad you got to spend time w/ both of your boys and that you will have some pictures to remember them by!!!!  I've been thinking of you and your DH a lot this past week and praying that you both are healing together.  All I can say is that time does help w/ the healing processes even though it is very hard at first.  Those boys will always be a part of your heart!!!!!!  With our boys lost they gave us hand/foot prints and a memory box to keep all their special things in.  We also had pictures, but they really didn't turn out very good b/c I think they waited too long to take them, so I was a little bummed by that.  I hope your pictures turn out better than ours.  I went and spoke w/ a counselor a while after our loss and even though I really hated going, it really made me feel better after I'd leave.  PM me if i can help you in any way.  Thinking of you!!!!


After 5 failed IUI's & 6 failed IVF's we threw in the towel w/ ART and then got a NATURAL miracle BFP! Hoping and praying it is finally our take home baby!  Mother to our twins boys in heaven -lost at 22.5wks on 6/20/09 and 1 other little angel in heaven.

Our Miracle has arrived... Caden James...

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#13 of 13 Old 04-21-2012, 10:24 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Ugh. I know people mean well, but this is really frustrating for me when people say it (and presumptuous). "So sorry...I believe it is God's way of telling you all was not well." In fact, we have no evidence that anything was wrong other than size so far. Absolutely no explanation for the loss.


Mama to my twin butterfly boys, Alan and Bruce, who passed away at 22 weeks gestation (3/24/12): Forever in Our Hearts. Our rainbow baby girl, my little bud of Hope,  joined our butterfly boys and Grandma Jan 1/31/13 at 9 weeks gestation. Love you so much. Next step: triadadopt.jpg
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