No one really died when I was growing up. I didn't know any that had something tragic happen. Some really really old family members died with I was really little. When I was 16 a great grandma died. And then no one until last year at 25. A great (life-long) friend/friends son died at 18 and then a friend died from HELLP syndrome. My cousins' dad just passed away today and the friend who's son died last year, her mom is in the hospital passing at any moment.
Death just scares me so much. Even if I *know* what happens when we die and I have my beliefs and I am comfortable with them it does make it better. I terrified to leave my kids behind and maybe even more scared to ever have to watch my kids die. It kind of feels like life is just one sad horrible goodbye :'(
Does anyone understand this? Have any ideas for dealing with it?