My Baby Died - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 07:22 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi there,

I'm new here. My baby died last Sunday and I am at a loss as to what to do. I gave birth to him at 14 weeks gestation and saw his little, lifeless body as it was happening. I was in shock and can't beleive how much I feel like dying.

I was wondering if there are any good books to help me, or any good resources. I feel empty and hollow.

Angel
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#2 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 07:59 AM
 
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I am so sorry Angel... it is a horrible loss. I don't have book recc. I know I spent a lot of time on threads talking about the loss and processing the feelings. I'm sorry this is how you are coming to Mothering, but welcome.
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#3 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 08:50 AM
 
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I just want to offer a big and hope you can work through this process of grieving peacefully and well. Know your little angel is in a good place.
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#4 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 09:57 AM
 
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Love, mama.
I wish I did but I Know there are many mamas here who will have very good recommendations for you. Also in the pregnancy loss forum.
Much love to you and your little one lost. hugs, mama.
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#5 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 10:12 AM
 
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My thoughts and hugs go out to you. I am very sorry for your loss.. I am sorry I do not have any ideas for books, but I wanted to say I was sorry, and I am sure there are many many woman here who will have an answer to your ?.
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#6 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 10:20 AM
 
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Oh Mama,
I'm so very sorry. I read books from the library don't remember names and it seemed to make it worse for me. I lost 5~i~'s total and each one hurt worse than the last. Talk to your family talk to your friends and if you have someone who's gone through it talk to them too. They'll be most likely the ones who understand the most. I'm so very sorry mama. Hugs. PM me if you need to talk more about it at all.

notes2.gifDina sahm to geek.gif, bikenew.gif, and joy.gif. I'm always computergeek2.gif, dishes.gif andhang.gif.
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#7 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 11:17 AM
 
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I am so sorry. I wanted you to know that we do have a Pregnancy and Birth Loss Board http://69.20.14.30/discussions/forum...aysprune=&f=22 that might be helpful to you, as well as this forum. Here is a list of resources that also might be helpful: http://69.20.14.30/discussions/showthread.php?t=66927 It lists books as well as poetry.

Welcome to MDC and please know that we are here to listen and support you during this difficult time.

Warmly~

Lisa

Lisa, Todd, Dane and Amber: & :::
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#8 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 11:19 AM
 
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#9 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 11:21 AM
 
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Angel, I am so sorry. I hope you are able to weep when you feel like it, get angry, and sit in silence when you want. Please take time to yourself.

I am so sorry for your loss.
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#10 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 12:20 PM
 
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I'm so sorry for your loss.



(((((((hugs)))))))))) & ~~~~~~~~~prayers~~~~~~~ sent to all of you

Me & DH hug2.gif , adult DD lips.gif & 7 yo DS guitar.gif . 2 GSDs, 6 rescue kitties, 4 birds & a gerbil.
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#11 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 12:20 PM
 
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Grief Songs: Stories Letters and Poems that Chronicle the Recovery and Survival of a Community After the Sudden Death of a Baby.

And The SIDS Survival Guide

Let me know if you want these. They are Free for Shipping. PM me with your address, and I can send them on Monday.
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#12 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 12:35 PM
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PhDin' mama to dd (Oct. 2005)
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#13 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 02:08 PM
 
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I am so sorry. Check out www.aplacetoremember.com They have lots of resources, and a whole shop of books on pregnancy and birth loss. Also please join us over on the pregnancy and birth loss board. There are many of us who have had similar experiences, you don't have to go through this alone.
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#14 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 02:42 PM
 
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I'm so sorry.
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#15 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 03:26 PM
 
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~Marie : Mom to DS(11), DS(10), DD(8), DD(4), DD(2), & Happily Married to DH 12 yrs.!
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#16 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 11:17 PM
 
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I am so sorry
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#17 of 41 Old 04-28-2006, 11:22 PM
 
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Honey, I'm so sorry.....
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#18 of 41 Old 04-29-2006, 04:13 AM
 
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Sending you peace, love & strength...

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#19 of 41 Old 04-29-2006, 10:14 PM
 
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I'm so sorry mama, I wish you peace.

A little bit grasshopper a little bit ant   energy.gifom.gif

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#20 of 41 Old 04-29-2006, 10:20 PM
 
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There are many of us here who know exactly what you are feeling - from our own experience. Please keep tucked away somewhere in your heart that many many women have gone through the same sad, overpowering feelings you are having. And we are standing on the other side of it helping you through.

Also remember your body is going through a hormonal shift.

Once I got to the other side of my grief, I looked at the whole experience as "cleaning out the nest", so I could grow a new baby down the road. And I did: I had two more big, chunky, happy healthy babies. And you will too. You will too.

Let yourself feel, let yourself grieve and be inside your feelings. Get them out and experience them fully. Ask for help, and do not let yourself get isolated. Ask a friend to throw a blessingway for you to nurture you and heal your heart.

Spirit is all around us. We are surrounded by love.
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#21 of 41 Old 05-01-2006, 10:04 AM
 
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I'm so sorry! I feel your pain! I lost my first daughter at 28 weeks, she was born alive and died shortly after.

The funeral home where we had her service gave me some good pamphlets, and offered a service to help us over come our sadness and to help us deal with our feelings.
Maybe yours offers the same.

It does get a little easier as time goes on, my dd has been gone 11 years.

It helps to talk about it, it really does. Don't keep in bottled up inside!

s
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#22 of 41 Old 05-06-2006, 04:07 PM
 
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when i miscarried i bought a tiny ornament of an angel, it gave me something solid to hold ion to an pick up and kiss, it helped me to have something to hold

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#23 of 41 Old 05-08-2006, 02:12 PM
 
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Angel,
I am so sorry to hear about your baby. I know words are meaningless, but I wanted you to hear that I'm thinking of you and I'm so very sorry for your loss.

Empty Cradle, Broken Heart is a good book on this kind of loss. You can also check out A Silent Sorrow: Pregnancy Loss - Guidance and Support for You and Your Family by Ingrid Kohn. I thought Life Touches Life was helpful, although it's the story of a woman that lost her fullterm baby, so the situation was different than what you've experienced.

Please hang in there. I'm sending positive energy your way.

Shelby
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#24 of 41 Old 05-08-2006, 03:24 PM
 
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I am so sorry.
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#25 of 41 Old 05-09-2006, 01:52 AM
 
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#26 of 41 Old 05-28-2006, 10:42 PM
 
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Big time hugs to you, I am so sorry for your loss and I hope you get the help you need. Lots of love is being sent thru your computer right now
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#27 of 41 Old 05-28-2006, 10:46 PM
 
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I am so very sorry


Mama to 9 so far:Mother of Joey (20), Dominick (13), Abigail (11), Angelo (8), Mylee (6), Delainey (3), Colton (2) and Baby 8 and Baby 9 coming sometime in July 2013.   If evolution were true, mothers would have three arms!

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#28 of 41 Old 05-29-2006, 12:48 AM
 
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I am a 40 year old unschooling, belly dancing, artist-mama of one almost 8 year old. I just had brain surgery and blogging.jpg about it a bit because it's just so surreal.
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#29 of 41 Old 05-31-2006, 05:10 PM
 
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I'm so sorry.
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#30 of 41 Old 06-02-2006, 06:47 PM
 
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As the mother of a SIDS baby (Zach was 2 months and 6 days old when he didn't wake up from his nap) all I can tell you is that the pain does lessen. It never goes away completely. Not ever. But it does get better.

If you don't have a good RL support system, find one. Surround yourself with people who love you, because that is seriously what will keep you going day to day.

If you need to talk, pm me. I know how hard this is for you. Just remember that you really are NOT alone.
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