How to talk to 3yo about death?- x-posted - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 2 Old 05-16-2007, 11:42 AM - Thread Starter
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I x-posted this in childhood years

If this subject has been posted before, please let me know, or could someone please send me the archive link?

We have a close family friend, J (MIL's best friend) who has known and been a part of our lives forever. My dd (3.5 yo) knows her really well. She is currently in the hospital and is not expected to make it through the week (liver infection). She has been sickly since about 7 or 8 years ago, and has been in and out of hospitals, but it looks like this time she will pass. In fact, today, they took out her IV so it looks like it will be within a few days.

I haven't even talked to my dd about this. She doesn't even J is in the hospital (we have never told her before) I have no idea how to tell dd about death. No one she has ever known has died. Her aunt and grandma's dogs both died, so I think we'll use that as an example, but no people. I am not even going to say anything to her until after it happens.

What have any of you done in this situation? How did it go.

BTW, my dd is extremely intuitive and verbal. She understands many advanced concepts. But her emotions are entirely age appropriate.


Julieknit.gif, DP to modifiedartist.gif, mama to DD (7)dust.gif , and DS (5)joy.gif

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#2 of 2 Old 05-17-2007, 01:12 AM
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I hope this link provides you with some answers. When my dh died, my ds was 3 years old. We kept things very basic and talked about how his body died, but how his soul continued to live on. Recently, we had to put down our 17 year old golden retriever and at the time, my dd was 3 years old. At first she didn't grasp the concept of death. But after a month, the grief set in and the emotions really arose for her. We continued to talk and read books about the loss and she really had to process the emotions.

There are some great kids books listed in the Grief and Loss Resource list that you might be able to find at the library. Please keep us posted on things and know that my thoughts are with you.



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