Hiney issues - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 8 Old 04-14-2002, 11:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Ok....This is something I think is strange. I have asked a few people and they all laugh....no help there. Anyone elses kid do something like this? (note...this is over the course of about 6 weeks now, the last was last week)

Ds is coloring nicely, I go to retrieve Dd from impending doom and return to find Ds not at the table anymore. He is in his room, pants and undies down, coloring furiously with the markers on his butt! "What ARE you DOING!?!" I ask. (Stupid question mom....coloring on my butt...duh.) He says "I dunno". Wash him.

Ds is in the bathroom making pee pees. I wonder if he is making more t.p./soap sculptures, so go to check on him......He's got handfulls of soap and is rubbing it on his butt. Wash him.

Ds in the bath......poking himself in the butt w/ various bath toys. I tell him he could hurt himself, and to please stop.

And the last.....Ds is again in Bathroom...taking forever. I pry nursing baby off me to go check on him. He greats me in the hall with a funny look on his face and pants around ankles. I say "What's up, Ds?". He says "There was an ant in the bathroom and he squirted toothpaste all over my heiney". I look...sure enough, blue toothpaste all over his butt....his lower back, his hands and arms. Also all over the toilet and bathroom rug. V angry! Yell...lecture on cost of toothpaste, time it will take me to clean up this mess...wash the boy.

What is going on? He is 4.....Is this some sort of "feel good" thing? I guess it would feel good to have something smooth rubbed on your butt.....: . I don't have any idea on how to curb this behavior. What do I say? Don't rub toothpaste, markers, soap, bathtoys on yourself? Do I have to gaurd the cooking oil? *sigh* I TIA for any suggestions, similar stories, or advice.

The Tabbie Family; DH , DS , DD , a few :, a couple : and me.
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#2 of 8 Old 04-15-2002, 12:19 AM
 
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I don't have any suggestions, but with respect, are we allowed laugh? I thought it was quite funny, but its not my kid! My dd just grinds.
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#3 of 8 Old 04-15-2002, 08:19 AM
 
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I'm sure your concerned (because your a mom). It sounds like he's just discovering things. Have you asked him about it? Not 'why are you', but maybe something like "do you like drawing on you hiney?" Or "did the ant squirt it on you hiney for a reason?" "Does it feel good to rub soap on your Hiney".

Ok, now stop laughing. Really, I always ask questions like this with my kids and usually they have an odd response and the odd behavior stops there! It's like 'ok, mom acknowledged me, she didn't make me feel bad, I'm done now'.

let us know how things go...
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#4 of 8 Old 04-15-2002, 08:22 AM
 
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Just wanted to add. My son used to strip naked at nap time. Everyone told me he had a thing for his penis and shooting it. So I asked him "Do you like taking your clothes off? Does it feel good?" He said "yes". I asked him if he could keep the diaper on, so he wouldn't wake up wet. He said "Ok" and never took the diaper off again. He still likes to strip though
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#5 of 8 Old 04-15-2002, 09:47 AM
 
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It kinda sort makes me feel good to read this, because my 4 yr old son does similar stuff, I must say, though, I was hopeing it was just a normal kinda phase and would go away with time. I have been wanting myself to ask a similar question. I have talked to him about it, and said stuff like, "we don't do that - do you see any of us doing that?" But he REALLY seems to LOVE being nudely - he loves to look at his fanny - and those of others (we cannot go to museums any more - he sees Boobies and PoPos (German word for it) everywhere). I've seen the boys in the day care in the bathroom sometimes proudly waving their penis' around and laughing and looking at their fannies, I try to limit it at home without wanting to make him feel ashamed of his Private parts. I do tell him that they are called that and explain to him what private means - but he says he can't help it - he just loves PoPos. One day we stopped for lunch at a truck stop in Holland, because it was the only place open on our Bicycle path. As we were ordering, ds was wandering around looking at the model trucks, etc. and he was very quiet. He was over at the table where there were trucking magazines and advertisements - and so I went over to him. He had a Playboy in his hands. I didn't really know how to react. Honestly, I wanted to laugh, but I just gently took it away from him and gave him another magazine about trucks and said I thought he'd like this one better (and then hid the Playboy under the stack). Ds informed me that I was wrong he doesn't like this one, he wanted to see the booobies and popos. (Thoughts in my head - it's all my fault for nursing him so long - what would my mother have done - what if someone finds out in the US I'd probably be arrested for child molestation . . . .) I just said, well, I don't think it is right for you. I wanted to say for his age, but then I thought, some of such magazines (not hard core or overly sexual) are probably more appropriate for these ages groups than the adults! - I'm thinking of the movie where John Travolta was holding a baby and they both see cleavage and John say, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking" and the baby says, "Yeah, LUNCH!"

Anyway, here there is much more open nudity - ads, tv shows, beaches - even parks! So as long as he is not being aggressive and seems to be discovering himself with joy I don't really think it is bad or dangerous - just irritating - which I tell ds, too. I hope he gets it over with now instead of waiting for when he is a teenager and the experimentation is even more dangerous.

Just wondering Irishmommy - grinds what?
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#6 of 8 Old 04-15-2002, 12:07 PM
 
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Revmami, she lies on her stomach, with or without her hand touching her privates, and rubs against the floor or bed. She has gotten better now, and rarely does it anywhere but in bed, but still needs the odd reminder about privacy.
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#7 of 8 Old 04-15-2002, 12:11 PM
 
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Sorry about that - I've been on these boards too much, I'm getting too wierd. . . . really sorry!
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#8 of 8 Old 04-15-2002, 05:24 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for your repiles! I do think he does it because it feels good to him. I was prepared for the penis obsession thing, but a hiney obsession I was not! At least he has refrained from showing his peinis to anyone (so far), unlike my nephew at 4, who came downstairs one day while we were watching TV to announce "Look at my penis! I have an erection!"

It did make me lol after I explained about things NOT to rub on yourself and he was out of earshot. I just never, ever thought this would be an issue!!!! He's not circ'ed....so I am extra concerened about him one day getting something (like toothpaste or soap) up under there and it hurting him. Ahhh...the joys of motherhood...LOL

The Tabbie Family; DH , DS , DD , a few :, a couple : and me.
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