My little boy just turned four, and I was wondering if some of you could share some of your experiences with your kids at similar ages.
I am a little worried about his communication. He has always lagged behind his peers somewhat in his speech, but can communicate and let us know what he wants, or how he is feeling (kinda) and on rare occasion he will tell us things that happened during his day.
But one thing that I find odd is that he asks questions he knows the answers to, and doesn't really ask many questions like his peers seem to do. These arent the ONLY question he asks, but if he we are just sort of sitting around, he says something like this to start conversation, maybe? I just don't know.
Is this really weird? I am concerned about my little guy
Mile High - how old is your DD? My son always knows the answer too (I try to turn the tables on him!)
Still, with his communication not being as advanced as his peers, I worry about this.
He doesn't really ask many questions, and I thought that's all 4 year olds were doing at this time. He does ask some, but not really out of curiosity, it seems to me... He doesn't seem very curious, which seems odd to me....
1. Parents do this to kids all the time. We ask 'display' questions as a way of teaching kids (e.g., what color is this? where does your jacket go?). So, they're practicing what they've heard.
2. They can't think of anything else to get a conversation started, but they want to talk.
Sometimes I turn the question back around for my kids (what time do we need to leave for school?0, sometimes I answer, and sometimes I give a really silly, off the wall answer just to amuse them.
I think when things seem atypical to a parent they usually are. I do know what you mean about the lack of curiousity type questions.
My spectrum kid does this. Sometimes, it's his way of starting a conversation/engaging someone in a predictable way. He knows how it's going to go. I also think he just does it out of habit. Sometimes he's just doing it on his own really. What happens if you answer in a silly way? If he says "what color is the truck" and you say "frog" what does he do?
Rachelle, mommy to 8 year old boys!
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he might just be the type to be quiet and observe and drum it over in his mind and then ask one v. indepth question rather than a million questions.
is he asking questions he asked a long time ago. could he be asking for a different perspective but doesnt know how to ask?
Mommy to our Twin Miracles born on 29/1/12
I used to do that as a kid, and it was because i used to love to hear my mom talk so if I asked a question she knew the ansewer to I wold get to listen to here tell me the answer or the story that acompanied the answer, it's like a book you read a million times but you still want to read it again and again.
Erin , Happy wife of Honey Bear , mom of Curly Miss (11/04), Little Mister (10/06), Princess Abi (3/08), and The Bean (9/09) <>< oh, and I blog.
My kid was doing this and it was driving me kind of batty so you know what my dad suggested (cause I did the same thing to him)? Make up an imaginary world and tell about the world little by little.
I was skeptical, but dad is seldom wrong.
So, I came with a name for our little world and at random times I would give him littel "factoids" about the world at random times based on whatever we were doing.
Now, instead of asking me the same questions over and over when he's curious about something he says, "Hey momma, where do they put their coats in Liberternia?" and various other things.
Sometimes he does it when he's wrestilng with how to figure something out and sometimes he does it when he just wants some dialogue.
I think it gives him a "safe" place to work out issues and wonder...and has majorly opened our lines of communication with each other.
We've incorporated all kinds of moral/ethical issues...just like storytelling....and also I'm trying to teach him about diversity so this helps me explain that some "worlds" (aka cultures) do things differently than we do.
And once we've started a topic I kind of step back and let him run with what's on his mind in the terms of Libertania....helps with his verbal skills too.
Does that make sense?
He does the same thing with the questions though. Constantly asking things that he knows the answer to. At first we tried to always answer, but i admit it got really annoying when it was a question a minute. So i started asking him "well what do you think?" I think it is mostly just a way for him to start a conversation, or get our attention without knowing what to talk about. Turning the question around on him i think builds his confidence a little, showing him he does already know what he's asking, is practice for his speech and for us it reduces the number of repetitive questions.
I pretty sure he does this b/c if he aksed "May I have some chocolate?" there is a high risk of mommy or daddy saying "No." Since DS already knows that the answer to "Do I want chocolate?" is actually "Yes," it is a safer question to ask. DS can be a wee bit manipulative .
The specific behavior of a 4 yo asking questions he knows the answer to isn't really worriesom. As you've seen from my example and many PPs lots of kids do similar things for a variety of reasons. Kids around this age often have somewhat unusual ways of comunicating.
However, I wonder if your gut is telling you that something else is going on, that is making you question this behavior.
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It's almost like a different version of puppet therapy (which was terribly annoying to me cause I don't enjoy talking to a stuffed animal). Lol.
You could also try,"Hmmm..That's a good question...I WONDER....". and let your son fill in the blank.
Of course there's,"I don't know." as you bang a pan on your head, but that one doesn't work for us either. Unacceptable to DD.
All of the ideas and input above are great and I thank you for the insight as well!
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