Please help . . .
My 4. y.o. b/g twins are taking a combination ballet/tap dance class. I feel strongly that if we sign up for a class, then we finish the class. We don't have to take it again, but we need to attend the class, participate in the class, and cooperate in the class.
My twins are high-energy, exuberant, and silly. Together, they become partners in crime, giggling and escalating into ever more silliness. It seems so many of hte little girsl in the class are sedate, quiet, cooperative.
They run in their tap shoes during class, despite being told numerous times to stop because its dangerous. My little boy will refuse to sit or stand by the bar and instead, run across the room, enthralled with the tapping sound. Or, when the teacher hands his hand to practice his part in the recital, he'll go dead weight, laughing and refuse to try. My little boy will shove other children out of hte way so he can stand by his sister. I started having him stand away from her because they played off each other less. But he keeps trying over and over to stand by his sister.
I feel like the teachers spend an unfair amount of time dealing with his misbehavior and lack of cooperation. I think (and would expect it) to frustrate them. It certainly frustrates nad mortifies me.
This is what I've tried: (1) when he runs away in tap class and starts tapping and running and disrupting the class, he gets warned that his tap shoes will be taken off, if he continues, he loses his tap shoes. That way, at least he's less disruptive.
(2) We have a reward system. They can go to McDs once a week after tap dance class if, and only, if they (1) participate and (2) cooperate. What that means is discussed endlessly. So if the teacher says run in crazy circles, you run if crazy circles. If the teacher says sit beside the barre, you sit beside the barre. And it means you try. You don't have to do it well. Just try.
I felt like part in teh beginning was that he had developmental delays from prematurity and hypotonia that made some of the things they asked him to do too hard. For instance, tehy asked him to stand up and dance backwards four times in front of the group. He cannot jump. He just started running in circles and his behavior disintegrated. I talked to the teachers and explained, and they are pretty sensitive and do well with it, I feel. For instance, the teacher will help him when kids are supposed to hop or something.
(3) We also have rewards where you get to pick a treat or reward as long as you don't get 3 strikes. 3 strikes and you are out. Last week, they both got 3 strikes and they didn't get anything from teh vending machine (which they love). (I had to carry them without shoes to the car, screaming and crying loud enough to take down the building. But they didn't get the reward).
This week, his sister earned 2 rewards for having zero strikes. My son was HORRIBLE and didn't get anything.
What do you suggest? I'm at wits end. And yes. I'm utterly mortified.
My 4. y.o. b/g twins are taking a combination ballet/tap dance class. I feel strongly that if we sign up for a class, then we finish the class. We don't have to take it again, but we need to attend the class, participate in the class, and cooperate in the class.
My twins are high-energy, exuberant, and silly. Together, they become partners in crime, giggling and escalating into ever more silliness. It seems so many of hte little girsl in the class are sedate, quiet, cooperative.
They run in their tap shoes during class, despite being told numerous times to stop because its dangerous. My little boy will refuse to sit or stand by the bar and instead, run across the room, enthralled with the tapping sound. Or, when the teacher hands his hand to practice his part in the recital, he'll go dead weight, laughing and refuse to try. My little boy will shove other children out of hte way so he can stand by his sister. I started having him stand away from her because they played off each other less. But he keeps trying over and over to stand by his sister.
I feel like the teachers spend an unfair amount of time dealing with his misbehavior and lack of cooperation. I think (and would expect it) to frustrate them. It certainly frustrates nad mortifies me.
This is what I've tried: (1) when he runs away in tap class and starts tapping and running and disrupting the class, he gets warned that his tap shoes will be taken off, if he continues, he loses his tap shoes. That way, at least he's less disruptive.
(2) We have a reward system. They can go to McDs once a week after tap dance class if, and only, if they (1) participate and (2) cooperate. What that means is discussed endlessly. So if the teacher says run in crazy circles, you run if crazy circles. If the teacher says sit beside the barre, you sit beside the barre. And it means you try. You don't have to do it well. Just try.
I felt like part in teh beginning was that he had developmental delays from prematurity and hypotonia that made some of the things they asked him to do too hard. For instance, tehy asked him to stand up and dance backwards four times in front of the group. He cannot jump. He just started running in circles and his behavior disintegrated. I talked to the teachers and explained, and they are pretty sensitive and do well with it, I feel. For instance, the teacher will help him when kids are supposed to hop or something.
(3) We also have rewards where you get to pick a treat or reward as long as you don't get 3 strikes. 3 strikes and you are out. Last week, they both got 3 strikes and they didn't get anything from teh vending machine (which they love). (I had to carry them without shoes to the car, screaming and crying loud enough to take down the building. But they didn't get the reward).
This week, his sister earned 2 rewards for having zero strikes. My son was HORRIBLE and didn't get anything.
What do you suggest? I'm at wits end. And yes. I'm utterly mortified.