6.5 yr old DS wants to shower w/ me... - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 4 Old 01-27-2010, 04:47 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I'm torn with this. I grew up in a fairly conservative household as in sex wasn't spoken of and our bodies weren't for touching or exploring ourselves, special names for private areas etc. Ex. I specifically remember exploring myself a lot as a child and being reprimanded for it. I didn't realize that masturbation was normal until I was in my 20's and I read it online. I always thought it was a shameful thing to do. I realize when I was younger it wasn't a sexual thing but still no one ever said "you should do this in private" and therefore I was always getting in trouble at school/preschool etc. Even more embarrassing as an adult.....ANYWAY

Lately, DS has been asking to take showers with me (I take them with DD-3). I really don't see a problem with it and I'm much more open about our bodies than my parents were but I often question myself because of how I was raised, it's hard for me to know what REALLY is ok. I know DH would also question it just because he gripes (sometimes) about me dressing/undressing in front of DS and want to be able to tell him it's just fine, he won't be scarred. What are your thoughts?
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#2 of 4 Old 01-27-2010, 05:00 PM
 
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I think it'll do more damage trying to hide it from him. We're pretty open here. I still dress in front of both of my kids, 3 and almost 8, and we don't have any issues. My older son doesn't mind getting dressed around us, but he really doesn't like anyone else to see him. We follow their lead on it.
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#3 of 4 Old 01-27-2010, 05:05 PM
 
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My kids aren't that old yet, but I don't think a thing about dressing in front of them or showering with them. All of my kids shower with my husband as our normal family routine.

I think the bigger of a deal you make this, the bigger of a deal it becomes. If showering with you is "sure, come on in", then it's nothing to fret about. If it's something that causes friction between you and your spouse, then in might become more of an issue in your son's mind.

Twin boys (2/05) and little sister (10/07)
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#4 of 4 Old 01-27-2010, 05:25 PM
 
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I think the most important thing is the comfort of your family. I shower with my kids sometimes but, they're girls. They don't shower with my husband because it's not something he or they (or me) would be comfortable with.

You have to decide what works for you. Honestly, though, if I were uncomfortable with it and my husband did it anyway, that would not be ok with me.

So, if this is something your husband isn't comfortable with then, I personally, don't think I would do it.

That being said, I don't think a thing about him changing in front of them. They come in and out of our room and there have been times they've been in there and DH gets out of the shower and is obviously naked. This isn't a big deal in our family. And, my kids know that if they're in our bedroom and they don't want to see daddy naked then they better get out.
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