A change has been happening in my dear 4 1/2 year-old daughter lately, and it makes me concerned. My daughter's always been a very happy, out-going, easily excited, enthusiastic, playful, comical girl who always loved all the kids at school and showed lots of self confidence. But this past fall, her best friend from preschool last year has left the school to be homeschooled and now my daughter's been left with only about 5 other girls her age there and maybe 7 younger girls, and the rest are 11 boys who think girls are yucky. 1 girl decided that my daughter was distracting her best friend from her and started telling my daughter to leave them alone and the other friend soon joined in telling my daughter to stay away. The other 3 girls their age heard this go on over the past few months and now the other 3 are telling my daughter to leave them alone, as well, and to go play by herself. My daughter was sobbing on Thursday, telling me the other 3 are now telling her to go away like the first 2, and the teacher is very busy and doesn't want to be involved with playground cattiness of girls, so she's no help.
On top of this, my husband's been going through a tough time and has been impatient with our daughter and probably corrects her for misbehaving more often than he shows love or affection to her, to be totally honest. He really loves her, but he's been a very negative person lately and has a hard time being affectionate with her when he's in a bad mood (which is everynight for the past several months, when he sees her). So, on Friday my husband told her angrily it was not ok to hit her sister for probably the millioneth time, my daughter said, "I hate you, I hate you, I wish you would go away forever and die!" I have never heard her use such angry words - we never talk like that at home, and she was crying and just in a rage. Her dad backed-off and I spent the rest of the evening with her and her sister, but she just was not herself after that. On Saturday she was strange all day - sort of disconnected and emotionally-sensitive, and today she seemed depressed and ready to lash out in anger if anybody asked her something she didn't want to hear.
Could it be that the mean girls at school and the constant correcting from her dad has just now hit the point that it's too much for her and she's now having all these emotional symptoms as a result of it? Do I need to pull her out of her school and start homeschooling her now (which I was planning on doing in September anyway)? Isn't it too early for a 4 year-old to be coming home, crying several times a week, because other 4 year-old girls at school has told her to go away and play by herself (it's not like she's 13 or anything!)Her dad has agreed to try his best to try to remind her of how much he loves her, and to try to find another way to work with her other than correcting her all the time, since he's really concerned about the change he's seen in her mood and behavior over the past few days, too. Do any of you have any thoughts about this, or have you had any similar experiences with your kids in this way, too?
Thanks so much for any advice or encouragement you may have about this!
~joy
On top of this, my husband's been going through a tough time and has been impatient with our daughter and probably corrects her for misbehaving more often than he shows love or affection to her, to be totally honest. He really loves her, but he's been a very negative person lately and has a hard time being affectionate with her when he's in a bad mood (which is everynight for the past several months, when he sees her). So, on Friday my husband told her angrily it was not ok to hit her sister for probably the millioneth time, my daughter said, "I hate you, I hate you, I wish you would go away forever and die!" I have never heard her use such angry words - we never talk like that at home, and she was crying and just in a rage. Her dad backed-off and I spent the rest of the evening with her and her sister, but she just was not herself after that. On Saturday she was strange all day - sort of disconnected and emotionally-sensitive, and today she seemed depressed and ready to lash out in anger if anybody asked her something she didn't want to hear.
Could it be that the mean girls at school and the constant correcting from her dad has just now hit the point that it's too much for her and she's now having all these emotional symptoms as a result of it? Do I need to pull her out of her school and start homeschooling her now (which I was planning on doing in September anyway)? Isn't it too early for a 4 year-old to be coming home, crying several times a week, because other 4 year-old girls at school has told her to go away and play by herself (it's not like she's 13 or anything!)Her dad has agreed to try his best to try to remind her of how much he loves her, and to try to find another way to work with her other than correcting her all the time, since he's really concerned about the change he's seen in her mood and behavior over the past few days, too. Do any of you have any thoughts about this, or have you had any similar experiences with your kids in this way, too?
Thanks so much for any advice or encouragement you may have about this!
~joy