Basis for weekly allowance... - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 15 Old 05-04-2010, 05:31 PM - Thread Starter
 
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If your child gets an allowance, do you base it on: A) a certain number of something that gets done in a week or B) they get X amount each week because they are X yo without regard for completed tasks.

I'm asking because I do it one way for mine and my dad is doing it a different way for my little sisters.
I don't want to say who does it which way because I'd like to hear untainted perspectives both ways.

Or if you do it a different way, I'd love to hear how you do it and why.

Thanks!

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#2 of 15 Old 05-04-2010, 06:10 PM
 
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Our dd gets a certain amount every week completely unrelated to any "chores." My dh is the wage-earner in our home, but we view the money as belonging to the family. We want our dd to learn about saving, giving, and spending- and to have some degree of autonomy about being able to buy things that she wants without necessarily having us "approve" the items. She's young (4.5yo) and her allowance is small, but I feel good about how it's going so far. We don't force her to save or give any of it away, but she has chosen to give money to charity on her own (when she saw March of Dimes ladies collecting money and asked what it was for she downright insisted that we go get her purse so that she could help the babies herself). We specifically didn't want it tied to chores because she already is happy to help as we do work around the house-- we don't want to belittle that internal motivation. Housework is something that we're laid back about-- but we all need to chip in with it, and try to make it fun by working together. Nobody gets paid for these things, but we all enjoy the benefits of having a clean-ish home, healthy meals, etc.
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#3 of 15 Old 05-04-2010, 06:18 PM
 
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Both boys get a certain amount each week on Sunday. The 5 year old gets $5, and the 10 year old gets $7. It teaches them responsibility, and when the oldest goes to the indoor skateboard park, it eliminates the constant need for money. They do chores because everyone cleans up, but the allowance is purely for them to learn to save and spend. I think at one point we were shelling out $20-40 a week for snacks, random toys at the store, etc. This is much better, and saves us money.

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#4 of 15 Old 05-04-2010, 09:43 PM
 
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Our kids get an allowance ($1/week) which is unrelated to chores. Our feeling is the children get some money to spend on whatever they want (though I have said "no more stuffed animals!") just as dh and I are able to. And we all do chores because everyone contributes to the household. We don't give them a lot because we want them to realize that sometimes they need to save for a bit to get something. And we also have a few little jobs where they can earn a quarter. We'll probably increase the amount at some time, but for now, they seem ok with the amount.
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#5 of 15 Old 05-04-2010, 10:00 PM
 
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I give my dd a dollar a week and without tying the money to anything. She also frequently gets a couple quarters from her grandpa for walking dogs with him and a quarter for sweeping so she usually gets about $6/month with that. I try to keep it at a level that will allow her to save for things she wants to buy.
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#6 of 15 Old 05-04-2010, 10:34 PM
 
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At what age do you start giving an allowance? Right now DS doesn't have a clue of the value of money - duh, he's only 2. We do allow him to have any loose change he finds around, and he knows to put it in his bank so he can save it for later. He's been known to carry a penny around in his pocket all day, waiting until it's time to go to the mall to throw it in the fountain. I feel like this is a good, age appropriate way to introduce him to money. Just wondering when others take it to the next level.

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#7 of 15 Old 05-05-2010, 02:39 AM
 
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We just started allowance in our house. DS (5) gets $5.00 a week and DD (8) gets $8.00 a week. We chose to give them an allowance because there are certain things we don't want to buy (junk food, crap toys, games at the stores, etc. . .). We all do chores in our house, allowance is not contingent on doing chores (if it was then DS would never get an allowance). We do have them put 1/2 of their money in their piggy banks every week for special events (last week we went to a pottery festival and they each picked out special things for themselves out of their piggy bank money) or for special, expensive things they want to buy. So far it's working out really well in our house. . .and it's made it a little easier to say no when we're out and about and the kids are begging for stuff/candy. . .I can just remind them about their allowance and if they don't have any left. . .well, maybe next week.

Barbara:  an always learning SAHM of Ilana (11) and Aiden (8) living in Belgium with my amazing husband.

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#8 of 15 Old 05-05-2010, 12:09 PM
 
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We give dds, almost 9 and 5, a dollar a week. We don't hinge it to any behavior as we just want them to learn to manage money. We do require that they put half in their banks and half is for their wallet. Initially, I gave it to them in quarters so that they could see the division. Now, I give it to them monthly because I was forgetting it on a weekly basis!

Sometimes I dislike what they spend their money on, but I've already seen them learning lessons. DD8 loved buying sillybandz and Playmobil, but now is heartbroken that her sister (5) has enough to buy an American Girl Doll (allowance combined with monetary gifts for her bday).

Money is a tough issue for me, so I really want them to learn to handle it well. I grew up with allowance some of the time, and not others. My mom required that I purchase some things that I see as necessities at an early age (like a blowdryer as opposed to air drying my very long hair), and basic clothing. She would take me clothes shopping and tell me that I should really buy some things, that they looked so nice, and that she would loan me the money. I remember almost always being in debt and paying her off with Christmas money and babysitting (started when I was 10).

I very clearly saw that you had to work to get things, but always felt I was without what I needed/wanted and was in debt. Not how I want my girls to grow up. Restricting money by potentially linking it to chores can lead to anger, imho. I, like the other pps, feel that the girls should help around the house because we're a family and help each other.

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#9 of 15 Old 05-05-2010, 12:26 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CuckooMamma View Post
We give dds, almost 9 and 5, a dollar a week. We don't hinge it to any behavior as we just want them to learn to manage money. We do require that they put half in their banks and half is for their wallet. Initially, I gave it to them in quarters so that they could see the division. Now, I give it to them monthly because I was forgetting it on a weekly basis!

Sometimes I dislike what they spend their money on, but I've already seen them learning lessons. DD8 loved buying sillybandz and Playmobil, but now is heartbroken that her sister (5) has enough to buy an American Girl Doll (allowance combined with monetary gifts for her bday).

Money is a tough issue for me, so I really want them to learn to handle it well. I grew up with allowance some of the time, and not others. My mom required that I purchase some things that I see as necessities at an early age (like a blowdryer as opposed to air drying my very long hair), and basic clothing. She would take me clothes shopping and tell me that I should really buy some things, that they looked so nice, and that she would loan me the money. I remember almost always being in debt and paying her off with Christmas money and babysitting (started when I was 10).

I very clearly saw that you had to work to get things, but always felt I was without what I needed/wanted and was in debt. Not how I want my girls to grow up. Restricting money by potentially linking it to chores can lead to anger, imho. I, like the other pps, feel that the girls should help around the house because we're a family and help each other.
Your post lead me to think a lot about how I was raised, with regards to money. My mom would go so far as to assign dollar amounts to certain chores. The thing is, the chores were always soooo far behind (because she rarely helped with anything herself) that I just decided I didn't want the money that bad. She also did like your mom and made me start buying my own stuff too early on, IMO. I think even in high school, it shouldn't have been my responsibilty to buy my own socks and underwear with my little minimum wage part time job. More often than not I went without those things. So in light of what you guys have posted, I think I will do things differently with my son too. Obviously I would never expect him to buy his own underwear (until he's an adult), but I would have considered paying for chores with allowance. I see now that that's not the lesson the allowance is meant to teach, though. If I have a hard time getting him to do chores (which I'm sure I will at some point) we'll have to think of another way of dealing with that.

Kat, wife to and mommy to (Dec 07).
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#10 of 15 Old 05-05-2010, 12:34 PM
 
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In our house, allowance money is not tied to chores.Everyone who lives in the house contributes to its care. The allowance is to learn to save or spend, depending on what they want.



I have a friend who tied allowance to chores and her kids flat out wouldn't do the chores after a couple of weeks. They didn't figure it was worth the ten bucks to clean the cat box or take out the trash.
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#11 of 15 Old 05-05-2010, 12:44 PM
 
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This is all very exciting reading (who knew I would ever get all excited over talking about kids and allowance)!

My parents gave us no basis for managing money and all three of us ended up in debt for a while after college. We just had no clue. We weren't given tons of money, in fact most things were just out of our hands and control. There were never any talks about managing or saving at ALL. I desperately do not want my daughter to grow up clueless about money but I have a husband who never says no. I am thinking this could solve a lot of our issues (fast food, junk toys, not understanding she can't get SOMETHING everywhere we go - he contributes to all of this) and help her start to think about money.
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#12 of 15 Old 05-05-2010, 06:14 PM
 
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We give DD a set amount each week ($3) that is strictly to help her learn to manage money. We do ask her to put $1 of that into the bank to save for something big (e.g. computer, car, college, etc). When she gets birthday morning or whatnot, she gets to decide if it all goes in her wallet or if some should go in the bank. Generally she does decide on her own to put a bit in the bank, which I'm pleased to see.
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#13 of 15 Old 05-05-2010, 06:52 PM
 
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Very interesting read. I did get an allowance growing, but it was based on doing chores. I never would have considered not doing them. The $ amount didn't vary by what I did, was just what it was.

But I actually don't think anything was required when I first started getting an allowance. My mother started it because I was asking for too many things at the store.

DH and I are horrible with money. Hopefully we have or more are learning our lesson. I am going to discuss with him-whom never received an allowance and got whatever he wanted-starting an allowance for K. I'm thinking one dollar a week sounds good for starters. But we might have a bonus for doing more-at least in the beginning. As he gets older and gets more, it would not be tied together.

Wow to those who had to buy their own things-necessities. I do not understand that. I guess if your family had money troubles that might make some sense, but in general does not at all.

~*Heather*~
Wife to J 9/00 Mama to K 12/05
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#14 of 15 Old 05-05-2010, 08:23 PM
 
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We do it X amount of money because you're X old.

Though I'll thoroughly confess that I'm terrible at giving out allowance, so it's more in theory than practice these days.

I feel strongly that everyone in the family should get a little disposable income to spend, if there is any. Everyone in the family should contribute to the running of the household. But the two should not be connected.

If you base payment on chores, then they can get away without contributing to the running of the house. Running a house needs to happen no matter what.

I'm not opposed to earning extra money by doing more than the base chores, but that's not the same.

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#15 of 15 Old 05-06-2010, 12:23 AM
 
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We are doing $X for X years old. We started when DS got to KG, partly because the school has a banking program. I think it was $1/week to begin with but that took him forever to save up for something. With some infusions from Christmas $, he eventually bought a $45 bat cave, which is a great toy. We let him decide how much to put in the bank and how much to keep and he tends to switch off. Allowance is not connected to chores because I don't want to fight about money that way.

He does earn jelly beans sometimes for chores and he can trade jelly beans for video game time. Though now we mostly let him play since he self regulates well on this and has tended to be a jelly bean hoarder.
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