kids and sticks - what are your rules? - Mothering Forums

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Old 05-11-2010, 08:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My 4 yr old loves sticks. Everywhere we go he will find a stick and carry it around with him and bring it home. This is fine by both of us but dh and I aren't agreeing on our 'stick rules'.
We have the obvious no hitting people or animals with sticks.
Other guidelines I'd like to have, b/c I'm not comfortable with them, is him riding his bike with a stick in his hand and even him running with a stick I don't love. Dh doesn't see it as a problem. We try really hard to be consistent and so far we haven't been with this one.
I'm curious if others have stick guidelines or am I totally nuts?
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Old 05-11-2010, 10:24 PM
 
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I have a rule of not holding anything in hands while riding (sticks or anything else). Also I do not allow running with long sticks (longer than the kids' palm). As in, if it cannot be mostly covered with fist-no running.

Mom of DS (07/2006) and DD (01/2008)
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Old 05-11-2010, 10:42 PM
 
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No wacking your sister, and no bringing it in the house to your bedroom. Those are really the only ones we ever needed (and yeah, the 2nd rule was because I found an ant covered one in his room one day when he forgot to take the bugs off first. : )

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Old 05-11-2010, 10:47 PM
 
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I don't really have stick rules other than don't hit people, animals, or easily damaged personal property (like people's cars, for instance), and don't bring them in the house. I also don't allow really long sticks in the car, ones that are big enough that they become a jabbing-siblings hazard in the back of my van.

I don't stress too much about running with them. Doesn't seem like a big deal to me. And the bike thing-- I don't think I'd allow it, but I don't know that I won't. My kids don't ride bikes really-- the twins are still tricycle-age, and DD1 isn't interested in her bike. So it's never really come up.

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Old 05-11-2010, 10:47 PM
 
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I don't think we always have a set "stick" rule, but we haven't had to deal with riding on bikes with sticks. That would kind of scare me, too. I'd probably explain that sticks can sometimes pierce like knives, and if he wouldn't ride his bike with a knife, why would he do it with a stick? But then again, my 6 yo typically sharpens the stick with his pocket knife first, so the stick is pretty much like a knife.

Other than that, I don't necessarily agree with the "consistency" thing. If daddy allows it, but I don't, I simply explain that mommy and daddy have different rules. Usually I defer to daddy's rules when we're both around. My kids don't seem to be confused by this, but every kid is different.
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Old 05-11-2010, 11:38 PM
 
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our rules: don't bring them inside, no sticks near the baby... that's about all...

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Old 05-11-2010, 11:54 PM
 
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My DD3 loves sticks. Our only real rules are no hitting and no sticks in beds. Running I'm okay with. Bike riding hasn't been an issue, it would depend on the child's skill on the bike and the size of the stick I think. I'm inclined to allow it though.

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Old 05-12-2010, 12:05 AM
 
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Can bring sticks in the car but can't hold them if they're long. We have a little four-door Saturn, and she has totally poked me in the back of the head before. Not cool.

But seriously... what's the fascination with sticks? Between the kid and the dog...

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Old 05-12-2010, 12:09 AM
 
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I don't allow running with a stick or riding with a stick. I will also have dd put the stick down if the game she is playing with a friend is a rough housing game where getting hurt with a stick is bound to happen. We also don't bring sticks home. I think that sticks are one of the things that make the park cool so we leave them for the next person to come.
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Old 05-12-2010, 02:00 AM
 
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DS is 28 months and our rules are:

No hitting people or animals.
No throwing sticks at people or animals.

I think that's about it. The bike riding issue hasn't come up for us yet either, since it still takes a fair level of concentration for him to pedal his tricycle and he hasn't tried to do that with a stick yet. He has a fascination with sticks and rocks.

Kat, wife to and mommy to (Dec 07).
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Old 05-12-2010, 02:10 AM
 
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No sticks while riding bike
No running with sticks
No poking people/pets with sticks
No hitting or "swording" with sticks
No sticks in the house unless you get approval (i.e. for a craft project)
No eating sticks.
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Old 05-12-2010, 12:50 PM
 
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No hitting or poking anyone with a stick
No sticks in the car
No sticks in the house
It has to be a stick. Not a whole tree branch. (DS2 picked up a HUGE branch on a bike trail and almost wiped out an old lady on a bicycle with it...)

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Old 05-12-2010, 12:59 PM
 
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General rules:
No hitting people, animals or throwing it
Sticks stay outside (of cars or our house!)

After that, I'm fine with running or biking mostly because they will have to learn those just don't go together.

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Old 05-12-2010, 01:00 PM
 
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The biggest rule I have about sticks is no swinging them when you are standing near someone and no damaging of property. I have a friend who is pretty relaxed about that type of thing and her ds once smacked my face and the baby I was wearing a sling with a stick. He also scratched my van purposely (he was 5 at the time and old enough to know better) with a stick. I'm probably a bit more firm about this because of what I've seen with my friend's son. I'm totally happy to see my kids playing in nature, but they are not allowed to hurt other people or things with sticks, rocks, etc.

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Old 05-12-2010, 11:10 PM
 
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No hitting people, animals, or breakable/ damageable objects with sticks.
No sticks around young babies/toddlers at the park.
Sticks in the car have to go on the floor for the duration of the ride.
No sticks in the house.
Sword fighting with sticks only allowed with a same-aged friend (not little brother) who is willing to play, play must not get out of control.

Today's addition to the stick rules was: No climbing up the slide holding a big pointy stick while someone else is trying to slide down.

Running with sticks is generally ok, as in I don't stress out about it but I'm likely to remind them that it's not very safe and that if they fall they are more likely to get hurt.

Riding with a stick has not come up yet, but at this point I don't allow riding with anything in their hands.

Mommy to two boys, ages 4 and 6.

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Old 05-13-2010, 11:11 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kittykat2481 View Post
No hitting people or animals.
No throwing sticks at people or animals.
Yep, that's about it. If other things come up, I ask them not to do it and we add it to our "list" but yeah it's pretty basic. He doesn't know how to ride a bike well enough for that to come up, and when dd rides her tricycle she likes to have her hands free still.

The one we have that's different than anyone else is probably "No unforgivable curses" because for my kids, most sticks are wands.

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Old 05-13-2010, 12:18 PM
 
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The one we have that's different than anyone else is probably "No unforgivable curses" because for my kids, most sticks are wands.
I'm adding that one to my list!

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Old 05-13-2010, 05:09 PM
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DD doesn't ride a bike very often, but I do sort of reinforce the idea of not running with a stick (if it's more than a very bendy twig), and of course to be mindful of others if we're at the park or something.

Honestly, she's very good about it, whereas once she has a stick, other kids always want to grab one and they play crazily with them, swing them around by DD's face, etc. I hate that!
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Old 05-13-2010, 09:36 PM
 
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Sticks are sharp objects.

If she's not allowed to do it with a knife or scissors, she's not allowed to do it with sticks. So that does include running and it would include riding a bike.

I think safety issues are different than other issues with a partner. I think you should keep discussing it until you can come to an agreement you are both comfortable with. With non safety issues you can agree to disagree, but in a case like this I think you need to find a compromise or he needs to give in. (since I'm on your side....)
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Old 05-13-2010, 10:08 PM
 
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My DSs are 5 and 21 months. my 5yo is allowed to ride with sticks, but he has to hold it perpendicular to him, and lay it across the handlebars and hold the stick with both hands. Same with his scooter. He's not allowed to hold the stick and "joust" with it while riding (and yes, him and his friend were doing this which caused the new stick rule).

otherwise, our rules are no hitting other things with the stick (people, animals, inanimate objects), no throwing sticks, and sticks are outside toys only. We're pretty lax in our stick rules.

DS1 04/2005; DS2 08/2008
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Old 05-16-2010, 03:34 AM
 
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No eating sticks.
Love it.
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Old 05-16-2010, 08:56 PM
 
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No hitting people or animals or mommy's flowers. No throwing towards someone, even if you don't mean to hit them. No eating. No taking a stick that you found that has been placed in the car in to a store or someone elses house.

Ds is 3. He doesn't ride a bike yet and doesn't want to hold a stick (yet) while riding his scooter, so we haven't crossed that bridge, but I don't see it bothering me.

Mama of three.
 
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Old 05-17-2010, 07:18 AM
 
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Our rules are, no hitting anything alive (people, animals, etc) and no running.

SAHM to my wonderful constellationwild.gif 5/2006 & northern light bouncy.gif1/2009 fly-by-nursing1.giffambedsingle2.gifslingboy.gif
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Old 05-18-2010, 12:43 AM
 
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Originally Posted by leighi123 View Post
No eating sticks.


I seriously have no "stick rules". At 6 years old it's never really come up. He doesn't have that same fascination with sticks that some young boys do

Steph, DH Jason (1-1-11), DS Owen (10-3-03) and DS Kai (10-13-11)

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Old 05-18-2010, 11:06 AM
 
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I used to only have the no hitting rule, until a good family friend said that when she was 15, she witnessed a 4 year old who was running with a stick, trip and jab his throat with the stick and died instantly. Now I have a no big stick and running rule.

SAHM Michael 01-07 & Emmy 12-08
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