Is it OK for a 3 yr old to not wear underwear? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 25 Old 06-04-2010, 04:06 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My dd is 3 and potty trained finally! But due to all the layers of pants and underwear, she has needed help with going potty. Things just get all bunched up on her own. So I just put her in pants w/o undies ad she can go all on her own and no problems.
Is this ok and should I put undies on her when going out to town?
Is it appropriate for her to just wear leggings or stocking under a dress for church so she isn't naked under there?
When should I start making her wear underwear?
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#2 of 25 Old 06-04-2010, 04:22 PM
 
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I think it is perfectly fine to go withour undies if that facilitates the potty-going. As long as she is covered up no one will know.
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#3 of 25 Old 06-04-2010, 04:25 PM
 
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I wouldn't force underwear. Although at church if she's in a dress, I'd probably put something on.

My kids do wear underwear always but that's more my fear of accidentally zipping something in there.
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#4 of 25 Old 06-04-2010, 04:48 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bluebirdmama1 View Post
My dd is 3 and potty trained finally! But due to all the layers of pants and underwear, she has needed help with going potty. Things just get all bunched up on her own. So I just put her in pants w/o undies ad she can go all on her own and no problems.
Is this ok and should I put undies on her when going out to town?
Is it appropriate for her to just wear leggings or stocking under a dress for church so she isn't naked under there?
When should I start making her wear underwear?
I wouldn't make her wear them. As long as she's comfortable, I'm not sure why use them. I went for like ten years without wearing them myself, in my 20s, and didn't miss them at all. Then I moved to a place with a very different kind of culture from my own and I felt vulnerable there and for some reason that led me to want to wear underwear. lol And now that I'm back, it's just habit to wear them.

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#5 of 25 Old 06-04-2010, 04:52 PM
 
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Isn't it healthy for women to have time without underwear anyway? Like, they recommend that if you wear it all day to not wear any to bed because having air "down there" helps lessen the odds of a yeast infection.

As someone that's prone to them I don't wear any unless I'm in a dress (and only if it's a dress + public) If she's comfortable that way go for it.

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#6 of 25 Old 06-04-2010, 04:58 PM
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I think it's fine. Plenty of kids run around with no pants at all while potty learning, there's one boy I know who only wears a shirt, from like 2.5-3.5.

This is actually making me wonder if this would help DD be able to go potty 100% on her own (when it's just pee)... hmm! I think the seams in her leggings/soft pants she always wears might bug her, though.

I don't wear panties to bed-- too bunchy and the elastic bikini straps on the sides can hurt if you roll onto them just the wrong way and sleep there for hours.
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#7 of 25 Old 06-04-2010, 05:45 PM
 
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I was wondering this too. DS is almost 3 and has been awesome about using the potty but he needs assistance getting undressed and getting on/getting the seat up. I was thinking of ditching the undies. Seems like one more layer for him to struggle with.
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#8 of 25 Old 06-04-2010, 05:51 PM
 
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My ds1 was potty trained only w/o undies for a couple of months. NOw he's generally OK w/ or w/o. We generally try ot get him to wear them, mostly cause' some of his pants don't fit so well, and its just easier to not have to worry about it But probably at least 2 or 3 days a week he goes w/o
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#9 of 25 Old 06-04-2010, 05:56 PM
 
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Neither my four or two year old wear underwear (both potty trained by two). In fact they spend most of their days naked. Hell I rarely ever wear underwear myself.
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#10 of 25 Old 06-04-2010, 07:43 PM
 
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All of my kids went through a no-undies phase in the midst of potty learning. I think it's fine. I would, however, put something on a little girl who's in a dress, if you're taking her somewhere where somebody's likely to mind seeing her bare-- I'd take her to my mom's, for instance, with no undies under a dress, but not to the store or to church. Places where people who you don't know very well will see her, ya know?

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#11 of 25 Old 06-04-2010, 09:21 PM
 
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DS went "commando" for years. I started insisting on it when he was going to school. Once he got pantsed

 

 

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#12 of 25 Old 06-04-2010, 09:26 PM
 
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I agree, if it makes potty visits easier, no underwear would be fine with me.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alyantavid View Post

My kids do wear underwear always but that's more my fear of accidentally zipping something in there.
Our rule is that if the pants zip, he has to wear undies. Otherwise its up to him. My son is very "tidy" in the bathroom so I think its fairly hygenic for him to go commando.

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#13 of 25 Old 06-05-2010, 09:53 AM
 
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I don't think there is necessarily anything wrong with not making her wear underwear, but my only thing would be that she needs to learn how to be in underwear and pull them up and down without getting them bunched up and such on her own and the only way to learn that is probably by wearing them. But I mean, she's only 3.. I don't think it needs to be a big worry
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#14 of 25 Old 06-05-2010, 05:39 PM
 
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I did not like wearing underwear as a child (still don't), so I rarely did. I did wear dresses often (4+ times a weeks), so my mom sewed some loose, light cotton shorts and bloomers for me to wear under my skirt. Much more comfortable!

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#15 of 25 Old 06-05-2010, 07:09 PM
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I wouldn't make her wear it. She'll be more capable eventually, and the way I see it, it's no big deal if a 3 y.o isn't wearing underwear. So long as she's comfortable.
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#16 of 25 Old 06-05-2010, 07:26 PM
 
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Is it she who wants to skip the undies, or you?

Properly fitting underwear is more comfortable for most people (obviously not everyone as many PPs demonstrate) than going without. It helps prevent chaffing and wedgies. It is also an extra layer of protection from thing like playground sand and the seat belt on child carseats that goes between the legs.

Underwear also serves the function of keeping clothing cleaner, and is an additional absorbency layer when she has accidents.

If she is basically happy with wearing underwear, I would let her keep it. I know the extra layer seems like an inconvenience, but most 3 yo need assistance in the potty one way or another anyway. Of all the layers, underwear is usually the easiest anyway. DS was able to potty alone at home when he was in just underwear well before he could handle blue jeans and such. The inconvenience of her needing help with the clothing is short lived. She will probably have it down in just a few months if you let her learn.

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#17 of 25 Old 06-05-2010, 07:40 PM
 
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No theres nothing wrong with not wearing under wear my dd. caitlin would probably quite happily go without knickers but as she mostly wears dresses and never wipes her bum properly it's not such a good idea though she does tend to strip everything off all the time though after school when she gets home.

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#18 of 25 Old 06-09-2010, 02:32 PM
 
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No one wears them Oh wait, hubby just started after 12 years commando--go figure.

Crunchy con wife with 1 DS and 1 lil DD born in Jan. I love breastfeeding, CDing and Friday night family bed.
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#19 of 25 Old 06-09-2010, 02:48 PM
 
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Dd is almost 2 and can do it on her own on the potty w/o undies!

at some point she'll prob want undies on, they're in her drawer.

although depending on what she's wearing ofcourse!

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#20 of 25 Old 06-09-2010, 10:02 PM
 
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my daughter was out with underwear while she was potty training but now that she's trained she goes out with undies and sleeps w/o undies coz that's her choice and i let her.

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#21 of 25 Old 06-10-2010, 05:18 AM
 
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Hee hee -- I had never heard the term "commando." Love it!

One of my best friends and favorite people for the past 27 years has not worn undies in that entire period (& long before I knew him, too). He's now in his mid-50s and doing just fine. I say, lose 'em!

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#22 of 25 Old 06-10-2010, 07:56 AM
 
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My DD, age 3, wore undies just fine until about six months ago, when she just refused. I tried buying her special Hello Kitty panties, but no go. I dropped the issue. She loves dresses and wears leggings with them. If she wears tights, I ask her to put on panties. Otherwise, she is free.

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#23 of 25 Old 06-10-2010, 08:11 AM
 
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No one in our family wears undies to bed. Ds(4) wears undies during the day when he changes into jeans or shorts and he, for one, doesn`t care if he pulls them up bunched or skewed. I say let her go without if there`s no fear of her flashing in public. At home, absolutely!
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#24 of 25 Old 06-11-2010, 06:45 AM
 
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I don't think it's a big deal. I'd want undies or shorts on with a dress or skirt, but other than that I wouldn't worry.

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#25 of 25 Old 06-11-2010, 06:52 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for all the replies. I feel better about letting her be undie free. I just thought it was what you had to do or something was wrong.
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