It never used to bother her. She loved how soft it was. Kids in preschool would pet her arms and tell her she was like a teddy bear.
Then in Kindergarten, someone made a comment but, not in a mean way, just told her she was furry like a bear.
Well, last year in first grade, someone made a more distinct comment about her furry legs and arms. Not really mean but, pointing out that it was different.
It got DD to start thinking about it and noticing other people really aren't nearly as hairy as she is.
She started noticing that when she gets goose bumps, it makes her hair stand up. Or when she has sunscreen on, her hair is more noticeable.
Well, I guess a boy in class said something to her yesterday. He actually touched her leg and said something along the lines of being shocked at how hairy she is.
She's very blond, with fair skin so her "fur" is very blond but, it is very thick and it does puff up on her arms and legs and in the sun, well, it sort of shines??
So, she was upset about what the boy said and she's been really fretful about it. She is really talking about how she's so different from other kids, no one has fur like hers etc....
We talk about not worrying about what other people think, we talk about how everyone is unique and everyone has things about themselves that are different from other people, I tell her I love everything about her and that I think her hair is beautiful and soft etc..... but, it really is starting to bother her.
She's only 7 so shaving is out of the question although, I would probably let her shave earlier than I would otherwise have allowed a daughter if this continues to be bothersome with people making comments. But it's on her arms too - not just her legs.
So, I guess I have two issues and I'm not sure how to deal with it. First, I can see how it would be an issue for her. I get how it would bother her. But, my concern is why it bothers her.
Objectively speaking, she's considered a very pretty girl. And, she likes being pretty, being told she's pretty, being concerned about being pretty etc.... so, the hair issue is of concern to me because I worry, is it just her being concerned about being pretty? Or, is it really an issue with potential to damage self esteem?
Or does it even matter? If it bothers her then it bothers her, maybe the reason doesn't matter? But, what to do about it. She's only 7.
Sigh..... Anyone else have a hairy daughter?
P.S. If you google that word, don't be scared by all the hairy faces. Like everything else there are different degrees in which it affects the body.
If it looks like I'm trying to pick a fight... I'm not, I'm rarely that obvious.
She's gotten comments from family though, and from the pediatrician. At first I cringed, but what can you do? We acknowledged it, because it's true.
We've had some fun conversations about it. Such as, what it would be like if she were even furrier? Wouldn't it be great! She would be more evolved - no need for clothes, better temperature regulation, protection from the sun, etc., etc.
I also told her the ending to a novel called Galapagos: A Novel by Kurt Vonnegut (the entire human race ends up evolving from a girl made furry by the radiation from the h-bomb). She liked that.
Plus, it's only on her arms and legs.
I do wonder if her hair will thin out with puberty?
JSerene - we do the same - talk about how soft it is, she's made jokes about not needing a sweater etc... but, I don't think she's finding it fun anymore so I want to be sensitive to her feelings and not make light of it anymore since that's not how she's feeling about it.
ETA: As an adult I'm pretty obsessive about shaving. I'm heavily tattood, so even my arms get shaved now. I don't mind, it's just who I am.
LeeAnn )O( Earth mama and mother to DD Leela (9), DSD Ari (9), DD Zen (7), DS Gabrael Riot (4!)
Self preservation is a full time occupation!
I think it will be difficult when my DD reaches that age if she gets hairy; she's 4 now and is just starting to get leg hair and so far it's pretty light in colour and volume. I would probably let her try the clippers to thin it out a bit, less radical than real shaving, IMO. Some kids are more sensitive about being different than others, I know everything about my body bothered me when i was a kid so I sympathize with your DD and the hair. BTW, it thinned out in my twenties I would say, but seemed to be at its worst during the teen years, when I was most self-conscious!!
I know this is an old thread, but I wondered how you were getting on with your daughter? My two daughters are the same but the hair is dark. Lots of medical testing done and there is nothing wrong with them hormonally it appears to just be part of their genetic make up despite the fact that no one else in our families are like this. My eldest daughter - nearly 7, cops a lot of comments about her arms in particular. I too wonder if they will naturally thin out at puberty. Most people tell me though that it will worsen. Just wondered how you ended up dealing with your daughters problems (if you did anything at all). Both my two girls seem to have started growing all this extra hair just after they turned 4. I really hope it doesnt get much worse as I dont know how I will deal with it for them.
Would love to hear from you about this.
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