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#31 of 55 Old 08-23-2010, 11:59 AM
 
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DD had just turned 3 when she started asking for them. I advised her they would hurt, but she insisted. It went fine. She winced during the piercing and then relaxed. We didn't put anything on them or even turn them and they healed just fine.

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#32 of 55 Old 08-23-2010, 01:43 PM
 
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Dd1 asks sometimes. I've told her she can certainly get her ears pierced, but that it does hurt. So when she's ready for that, we'll do it. I think I was 12 when I got mine done; seems sort of arbitrary.

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#33 of 55 Old 08-23-2010, 01:54 PM
 
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For some its a cultural, traditional thing to pierce baby's ears. DD started asking when she was about 9 or so. I wanted to wait but DH said yes before I got a word in. So, we went to do it together. I went first (to reopen my second set) but to show her the process.

The first ear she screamed and wanted to stop. Had a huge fit. We actually had to leave and come back about 1 hour later to do the other ear. I knew we should have waited. On the flip side, she cared for them and at 12 has well healed ears. Just wasn't the special event I wanted it to be.
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#34 of 55 Old 08-23-2010, 01:57 PM
 
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DD wanted to get her ears pierced when she was 3. We made sure that she understood it would hurt. She decided she wanted them badly enough and she got them done.

She had them for years, but they have since closed up and she's asking to have them pierced again. This time I want to take her to a body piercing shop and have them do it with a hollow needle. I told her if she still wants them next year when she turns 10 I'll take her in for her birthday.
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#35 of 55 Old 08-23-2010, 02:52 PM
 
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We just had dd's ears pierced this weekend, she is 7. She had asked when she was younger but changed her mind after watching videos of ear piercings, which honestly was our goal. This time she had talked about it all summer long but we waited until school started b/c we do a lot of lake swimming in the summer and I wasn't comfortable with her having new piercings in lake water. We watched videos and talked about the process and how it would feel. She knew the only way we were ok with it was if it was done by a piercer, not a gun at the mall. She did great when they were pierced, no flinching, no tears. She's also been very good not to touch them.

I am doing all the cleaning of the earrings but I am comfortable with that. Knowing dd's personality, I think I would still have to be responsible for the cleaning even if she was older. And honestly I wasn't very good about taking care of the piercings I had done in high school, they are all closed up now and some did get infected. I just wanted her to be old enough to understand why she shouldn't handle the earrings or let others touch them, and she was not that mature when she first started asking at 4-5. She really matured over this summer and I just felt like we were all ready for the experience.

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#36 of 55 Old 08-23-2010, 02:55 PM
 
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I have been willing to do it since dd was old enough to make the sentence she wanted them. But she hasnt yet and not sure she will any time soon since it involves a needle.

 
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#37 of 55 Old 08-23-2010, 03:38 PM
 
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I haven't set a firm age, but I'm thinking somewhere around 13 or so. I had mine pierced when I was younger and got horribly infected, pussy, crusty earlobes from not caring for them properly which still makes me queazy to think about to this day. Also, it seems like such a grown up thing to do, and I really don't like the idea of my young children with pierced ears.
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#38 of 55 Old 08-23-2010, 09:33 PM
 
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Originally Posted by annettemarie View Post
We've told our daughter 13-- it seems like a nice way to celebrate becoming a teen, if that's what she wants.
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#39 of 55 Old 08-24-2010, 02:03 AM
 
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Probably around the same time I got them, at around 13-15. She needs to want them. She needs to be responsible enough to care for them. She needs to responsible enough to choose quality jewelry to use. (I've seen some really nasty infections.) She needs to make a choice to modify her body. I know it is a cultural thing for some people but I always cringe when I see children, infants especially, with earrings.

I was pierced with a gun and I remember it really hurting then, and really hurting after.
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#40 of 55 Old 08-24-2010, 02:12 AM
 
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oh my sis just hers doneat the mall and they got horribly infected. i sent her some supplies to redo it
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#41 of 55 Old 08-24-2010, 02:36 AM
 
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DD started asking when she was about 5 1/2. After her consistently asking for a good six months, we decided to make it a 6th birthday present. She was aware of the pain and that she needed to take care of them, and she was willing to go though with it. She is a very mature 6 year old, and I think by allowing her to decide for herself, we made the right decision.

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#42 of 55 Old 08-24-2010, 01:43 PM
 
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DD started asking when she was about 5 1/2. After her consistently asking for a good six months, we decided to make it a 6th birthday present. She was aware of the pain and that she needed to take care of them, and she was willing to go though with it. She is a very mature 6 year old, and I think by allowing her to decide for herself, we made the right decision.
We have set 6 as the age when she can get her ears pierced. She has been asking since before she was 3. I just don't trust that she understands what is involved with piercing, plus she is very skittish about pain. I don't think she would let me put alcohol on them if it stings and don't even get me started about the actual piercing. She screams and twists when she has to get a shot.

I would rather wait until she absolutely understands what is involved. Until then, we will play with stick on earrings.

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#43 of 55 Old 08-24-2010, 01:52 PM
 
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Originally Posted by velochic View Post
To me, permanently altering the body is something that women do. When dd gets her period, we'll celebrate with ear piercing... if she remembers.

When she was about 4 and 5, she asked about it a lot, then it totally dropped off of her radar. She hasn't even mentioned it for a couple of years now.
I agree, I had always planned on waiting til she was older (LOL, she's only 11 months right now) and that's a lovely idea, I'll let her do it as a celebration of her first moon time, if she would like to have it done. I hate seeing it on babies, but that's just MHO. It's pretty common with the people I know, though, I get a lot of shocked questions about why I haven't had my DD's done yet (again, she's only 11 months!)

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#44 of 55 Old 08-24-2010, 02:14 PM
 
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I had always decided to do it when she had really wanted and asked for it. For DD, that was last year about this time when she turned 5.

We had it done in a doctor's office, and it went great. Her ears healed well. She was good about having me help her with them. However, we had complications.

Her ears reacted very poorly to anything except for gold. So, we didn't have that many pairs of earrings once they were healed enough to remove. We lost a couple and when we got some to replace it, she was extremely concerned about losing them again. Unbeknownst to us, she started tightening the backs on her own.

I checked her ears about every other day, and I discovered that she had tightened the back so much it was stuck in her ear lobe. It was an extremely tragic visit to Urgent Care to have it removed. We feared she would have permanent damage. Luckily she hasn't--her ear healed perfectly fine but the holes did close. As it turns out, she broke her arm the very next day and that pretty much overshadowed the earring trauma!

Just the other day she said she would like to have them done again. I think we might way another year mostly so I'm sure her ears are fully healed, and I think we'll stick with gold hoops next time.

She was so proud of her earrings, and I'm sad for her that she's had the difficulties.

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#45 of 55 Old 08-24-2010, 02:19 PM
 
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DD was four. She had asked for awhile and unlike my own mother (I had to be 11) I didn't see a need to wait. I explained that it would feel like a shot and she still wanted to go for it. After she kept the original studs in for 5 months and they were well and truly healed we bought her two very small, appropriate for her age pairs of earrings that are 24k gold and she has been wearing one of those pairs for a few months now happily with no desire to switch them out.

We've had zero problems so far!

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#46 of 55 Old 08-24-2010, 02:24 PM
 
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I keep seeing the reason to delay of the need to "take care of them". What precisely is there to take care of after the initial healing period? Maybe this has to do with letting children choose and change the jewelry themselves? We're not doing that so we haven't had any issues.

Just curious!?

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#47 of 55 Old 08-24-2010, 02:28 PM
 
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When they can take care of them on their own and they ask for them.

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#48 of 55 Old 08-24-2010, 02:33 PM
 
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I keep seeing the reason to delay of the need to "take care of them". What precisely is there to take care of after the initial healing period? Maybe this has to do with letting children choose and change the jewelry themselves? We're not doing that so we haven't had any issues.

Just curious!?
I wonder about that, too. As I said upthread, my DD got her's pierced at age 3, and there was really not much to taking care of them. I swabbed them with the solution they gave us, and turned them a couple times a day for a few weeks. Not any kind of big deal or hassle. I used to have multiple piercings in my own ears, and have had my labret pierced - never had an issue with healing or infections, or anything. It certainly isn't any more complicated than say, tooth brushing.

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#49 of 55 Old 08-24-2010, 02:47 PM
 
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As soon as DD wants to, we're off! If I didn't think it was wrong ethically, I would have done it soon after birth. But I've been asking DD since she was about 3 and she almost always says "No." When she says yes, rarely, I explain that it would give her a little "booboo", and then she changes her mind. I really don't think she'd like them right now, she tends to put jewelry on and then take it off very quicky and I think she'd be upset that she couldn't take them out for a long time. So we'll just wait, she might be quite a bit older by the time she's ready (due to special needs as well).

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#50 of 55 Old 08-25-2010, 02:27 AM
 
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There's a genetic type of scarring disorder that runs in my family so when we were kids the rule was we could get our ears pierced when we were adults. My understanding is my mother actually had to get surgery to fix the scarring on her ears after having them pierced as a child.

Anyway, I did ask about it a few times, but never consistently, that I remember (I'm not very girly) My sisters were a bit more persistent, but the rule was firm. When we were very young, we used stick on earrings- you know, those cheap puffy sticker ones? When we got older, my mother found clip on ear rings for us. These worked fine. When I grew up and went to college, I wore a different kind of fake cartilage ring for a year while I made up my mind if I really wanted it done. Honestly, if my roommate hadn't offered a piercing as a gift, I might have just kept wearing fakes.

As adults, I think 2 of my sisters pierced their ears. I have one cartilage piercing, but not my lobes, and one sister I think has none. In any case I'm glad my parents didn't give in to requests to get my lobes pierced as a kid. As an adult, its not something I wanted, and I'm quite happy that we had to wait.
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#51 of 55 Old 08-25-2010, 03:01 AM
 
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I've been telling dds (now almost 5) when they're 13 if they still want to. But then I had mine done by a friend with an ice cube and a needle at 7 without ever discussing with my mom; I'm hoping they don't take that route.
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#52 of 55 Old 08-25-2010, 11:08 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Charbeau View Post
I keep seeing the reason to delay of the need to "take care of them". What precisely is there to take care of after the initial healing period? Maybe this has to do with letting children choose and change the jewelry themselves? We're not doing that so we haven't had any issues.

Just curious!?
There is the initial healing period, which I want DD to be able to take care of herself. No, not a big deal to do ourselves... but to me, that's part of the "responsibility" of having earrings... and also if/when they get infected, I want DD to be able to put the medicine on and clean that too. It's not that it's a hassle, it's just that I think if she's old enough to have earrings, she should be old enough to take care of them as well... It's the same with a pet for us. If they're old enough to take care of the responsibility that comes with it, they are old enough to have them then. Kind of like a right of passage, I guess.

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#53 of 55 Old 08-25-2010, 11:19 AM
 
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There is the initial healing period, which I want DD to be able to take care of herself. No, not a big deal to do ourselves... but to me, that's part of the "responsibility" of having earrings... and also if/when they get infected, I want DD to be able to put the medicine on and clean that too. It's not that it's a hassle, it's just that I think if she's old enough to have earrings, she should be old enough to take care of them as well... It's the same with a pet for us. If they're old enough to take care of the responsibility that comes with it, they are old enough to have them then. Kind of like a right of passage, I guess.
Yep, this. Also, DD and I both have the same type of hair-long, curly, prone to breakage. And when I had mine done (first hole in the lobe at 13 and then another at 14) both times in the twisting of them, I would catch a bit of hair and it would get wrapped around the post. So for us, in addition to swabbing twice a day, there's also checking it to be sure there's no hair wrapped around the post, so it didn't get infected. Which happened anyway, so then there's taking care of the infection as well.
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#54 of 55 Old 08-25-2010, 11:50 AM
 
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For me the "taking care of" thing was just keeping them clean the first few weeks while the holes healed. Which she did with no apparent trouble.
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#55 of 55 Old 08-25-2010, 02:24 PM
 
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I got mine done when I was 13 so that I could have pierced ears for my first concert, the GoGos (opening band INXS).

DH's culture typically pierces as infants--but we've both agreed to wait until DD is 12 or 13. I think it's a nice coming of age ritual.

Mom to DS(8), DS(6), DD(4), and DS(1).  "Kids do as well as they can."

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