How old before child should be dry through the night? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 28 Old 10-26-2010, 05:20 PM - Thread Starter
 
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DD2 turned 4 in August. She has been day PLd since just before she turned 3, so over a year now. She wakes up with a soaked pullup nearly every day, however. I have asked her if she wants to wear underwear to bed, and she says yes. She gets up most nights at least once, for bad dreams or to be tucked in or whatever, and if I remember (I'm half asleep), I will take her to the bathroom. She is still waking up wet. I thought that children weren't developmentally ready to be dry at night until at least age 5, but her older sister (6) was consistently dry shortly after she PLd. Her friend (3) and her cousins (3.5 and 4.5) have also been dry at night since they PLd. It's not a huge deal, I know if she's not ready it will happen eventually, but is there anything I can do to help facilitate a quicker readiness? Pullups aren't cheap!

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#2 of 28 Old 10-26-2010, 05:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Sorry, just realized I probably posted in the wrong forum. Feel free to move it, Mods.

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#3 of 28 Old 10-26-2010, 05:24 PM
 
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Some kids are dry through the night as early as 3. My old neighbor's boy is 12 and still wears a pull up at night. I know that's extreme but I've been hearing more and more of "older" (boys mainly) that are still having trouble staying dry at night. My DD4 turns 5 next month and she's consistently been dry at night, although waking up to go pee during the night sometimes, for almost a year now. Maybe shorter, like 9 months. But my DD2 is not even trying to go potty on her own. If she's wearing a pullup its to pee in, not to go to the potty and pull it down. But if she's not wearing one, she'll go on her own no problem. She's just not wanting to do it full time. So I have no idea when we'll get to the night portion of potty training. She's also a super heavy wetter. We're talking a soaked through night time pull up every night.

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#4 of 28 Old 10-26-2010, 05:32 PM
 
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Depends on the kid. My oldest was potty trained at 2 and wore a diaper at night for a couple weeks. He's 8 now and has wet the bed maybe 5 times since then?

My younger son is 4.5 and still wears a pull up to bed. He was also potty trained at 2, but he just isn't ready. He does stay dry most night now, but he still wears it because once a week or so he won't wake up in time.
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#5 of 28 Old 10-26-2010, 05:38 PM
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DS1 was potty trained at age 2 and had virtually no daytime accidents. He wet the bed nightly until he was 11. He was diagnosed with sleep apnea at 13, so we're thinking that might have had something to do with it. However, my mom says her brothers wet the bed for many years, too.

DS2 didn't figure out the potty until he was nearly 4. He wet at night occasionally (maybe once a month) until he was about 6.

They're all very different.
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#6 of 28 Old 10-26-2010, 05:43 PM
 
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My son turns 4 in a few weeks, has been out of daytime diapers since he was around 2 1/2, and is dry at night about half the time. Sometimes he wakes up and needs to pee, mostly he sleeps through it. He *hates* wearing diapers, so we let him fall asleep without one and then put one on him when we go to bed. If he wakes up and fusses about it, we send him to the bathroom to pee and then let him sleep the rest of the night without a diaper.

We co-sleep, though, so I'm in no rush to push the issue. *I* do not like waking up wet
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#7 of 28 Old 10-26-2010, 05:49 PM
 
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Totally depends on the kid. My oldest was dry all night by her 2nd birthday; my next child was out of diapers at night when he was 3 (eh, or maybe he was 4, I really can't recall). My third and fourth children (now ages 3 and 5) wake up soaked most mornings; the 3 yo is more likely to be dry than the 5 yo. I just make sure they have diapers on, and it saves on washing bedding frequently. I figure they won't be wetting the bed when they go off to college, so it's not a big deal to me.

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#8 of 28 Old 10-26-2010, 06:28 PM
 
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I figure they won't be wetting the bed when they go off to college, so it's not a big deal to me.
My DS (age 4.5) was good to go during the day at age 2 but it wasn't until this year that we got the nighttime handled and even then, there are occasional accidents. He goes to bed at 7; I go around 11 so I wake him to pee then. We co-sleep so I have a vested interest in making sure he gets up to pee.

The other thing I noticed is that days when he has a lot of dairy, he tends to sleep harder and an accident is almost guaranteed. This happens especially if he has milk with dinner so I try to keep his milk intake to earlier in the day. It seems to be a common problem with boys.

But just like Drummer's Wife, I reasoned he won't be going off to college wetting the bed.
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#9 of 28 Old 10-26-2010, 07:50 PM
 
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Just to confirm the huge range in ages- my neighbour is 9 and still wears PUs to bed. She wakes up soaked every single morning!
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#10 of 28 Old 10-26-2010, 08:01 PM
 
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We started pl'ing because our son was dry through the night at age 2y2m . And then the flood when we work. Instead, we moved him to the potty. He will sometimes wake to pee now or more likely wakes up and then realizes he has to pee. He has been out of diapers at night for at least 8 months. Maybe one wet bed (and not even the whole bladder) ever 3-4 months.

I have a cousin who still has frequently night accidents at 16 . They finally switched her to a non-dairy diet and that helped some.
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#11 of 28 Old 10-26-2010, 08:06 PM
 
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My DD turned 5 in August and has been in panties durring the day since just before her third b-day, she has only been out of pull-ups since the week before her b-day. (we tried to continue with cloth but she was waking up in a puddle every night). My son who is now 15 was night and day dry at 2.5. Every kid is different, I had always assumed that girls were easier than boys but my little one really just needed to go at her own pace, she still will not wipe her own bottom with mom or dad double-checking.

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#12 of 28 Old 10-27-2010, 12:44 AM
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I figure they won't be wetting the bed when they go off to college, so it's not a big deal to me.
Years ago when I was doing a lot of research about bed wetting for my older child, I read that approximately 1% of adults wet the bed.

If you Google "adult bed wetting," there are lots of hits.
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#13 of 28 Old 10-27-2010, 03:23 AM
 
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my dd was dry from 20 months old. yeah 20 months. had me freaked out enough to call the doctor. both night and day. started with night which is when the nurse actually pointed out perhaps she is ready to be pt. and she was.

and me? not until i was 12 or 13. i was day dry young. but not night. and i am not as rare as people think i am.

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#14 of 28 Old 10-27-2010, 08:48 AM
 
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Staying dry at night isn't behavioral - it's hormonal. Until the hormone comes in that wakes a child when they need to use the bathroom, they will continue to be wet at night.

DS is 5.5 and no signs of night time dryness. We addressed it with 3 pediatricians (his regular, his developmental and my SIL who's a ped) and they all said the same thing. We'll worry/talk about it when he's 8.

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#15 of 28 Old 10-27-2010, 09:11 AM
 
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i don't think there is a should.

my two dd's were fully trained (night and day) by 24 months.
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#16 of 28 Old 10-27-2010, 09:14 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Staying dry at night isn't behavioral - it's hormonal. Until the hormone comes in that wakes a child when they need to use the bathroom, they will continue to be wet at night.
That's what I had thought, something about a mature bladder. But then I found out about all these other kids (and her sister) that were staying dry, I wasn't sure if it was something off with her or if she was normal. I appreciate all the replies, it is easing my mind a bit. The dairy theory is interesting, they always have milk with dinner. Maybe if I change it to lunch. Thanks everyone!

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#17 of 28 Old 10-27-2010, 09:32 AM
 
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My 8 year old still has accidents... he just doesn't wake up... he was PT at 3...

I EC'd my other three...

DS#2 was dry at night before a year...
DS#3 around 18 months...
DD is 9 months and has been dry at night since she was 3 months old. If she needs to pee she'll tell us and we'll potty her... but she sleeps though most nights and stays dry..

 
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#18 of 28 Old 10-27-2010, 10:05 AM
 
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I also don't think there's a "should." My older son sometimes wet at night until he was nearly 5. We just put him in a diaper at night, and whatever happened happened.
My younger son is almost 4, and he wakes up wet every single day. I'm not worried about it. It's a physical development thing in almost all cases, not behavioral.
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#19 of 28 Old 10-27-2010, 10:14 AM
 
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my oldest still pees (usually not IN bed, but on her way to the bathroom - she wakes up as she needs to go, rather then before)... this happens nearly nightly. Though from about 8 until recently (at age 11) she had no issues, and i chalk it up to her hitting some rapid puberty growing that either her body or hormones just have not catch up with her yet.

My 7 yr old has been night dry for over a year now... she has the rare accident (maybe 3 times in the last year)

My youngest is 4 and still has to wear protection at night, it's RARE if he is dry.

I had learned that night wetting is more common if there is a family history of it happening.. my dh was 11 before he was dry all night, every night, and while i didn't bed wet, both my brothers did well into their teen years.

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#20 of 28 Old 10-27-2010, 10:44 AM
 
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My older DD is six and still wets at night, about four days out of seven.

My DD2, on the other hand, is 3 1/2 and mostly dry in the mornings. DS is that same age, and still wets copiously at night.

I think there's a huge range on this.

And I don't think there are "shoulds." Certainly at four years old I wouldn't give it a second thought. And I wouldn't put pressure on the child-- for most kids it's not something that can be learned. It's a biological transition that happens, and it happens at a huge range of different ages.

I might look into cloth options for nighttime protection, though, if the disposables are bugging you. We've got Starbunz Super Undies, and we like them a lot.

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#21 of 28 Old 10-27-2010, 11:40 AM
 
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Both my girls were Pled at 2, DD1 was dry at night from then on, DD2 is 4 and still soaks a dipe every night. I know she will do it in her own time.

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#22 of 28 Old 10-27-2010, 03:31 PM
 
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I agree with what most pps have said, it depends on the child. But I just wanted to share my experience. Ds was pld at 2 and a half during the day. I continued to put him in nappies at night and waited for signs that he was ready to go all night. He always woke up soaked. Nearly a year later, I'd talked to him about not wearing nappies at night and he'd always rejected the idea. Then out of the blue he said he didn't want to wear nappies at night anymore. I was a bit apprehensive as he was still waking up soaked but I thought I'd give it a try. Well, we never looked back. He's been in underwear at night since Feb and has only had a couple of accidents. I was vigilant about making sure he'd been last thing before bed and first thing in the morning. So if your child is saying that she wants to wear underwear to bed perhaps you should give it a try. She might surprise you.
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#23 of 28 Old 10-27-2010, 10:41 PM
 
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DSD is turning 7 in about a month and if we didn't get her up before we go to bed (anytime between 10:30 and 12 or 1am) I'm not sure what we'd face. She was day-time trained at, oh I'm not sure, maybe 2 1/2, and actually didn't have daytime accidents until much later. When she does it's usually because she doesn't stop playing in time, and sometimes I think she may not notice she has to go until she *really* has to go because I've taken her to bathrooms or port-a-potties myself and had her undies be damp already. Anyway, she was in pull-ups at night until about age 5 or 5 1/2, and would simply sleep through everything. After finally being dry for a bit she went back to having accidents so we started getting her up. There have been a few instances even after getting her up of her having damp undies in the morning, and once when SO decided she didn't need to be woken up since she'd gone to bed late (I thought we should), she did a real number wetting the bed - she has a plastic sheet under her bottom sheet, but because it happened when she was at the edge of the bed, it soaked the fabric sheet and ran down the plastic one all the way to the box spring and bed frame. It was a really frustrating time for me when she was in pull-ups because they would be soaked in the morning, and occasionally she'd sit on the sofa or something with a still-soaked pull-up leaking. I think that I was of the (probably wrong) opinion that she was choosing to not get up and choosing to sit in a full pull-up, etc. I guess I somehow thought (perhaps due to a lack of experience or knowledge of children, and maybe because my sisters and I never had any accidents and my mom said we were dry through the night early on) that even at 5 she was way too old to not stay dry at night. It was hard for me to agree it is probably physical development and the fact that her father wet the bed til he was about 11, plus she sleeps like the dead just like him. So we're doing better now, but we continue to get her up to avoid accidents.
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#24 of 28 Old 10-28-2010, 12:00 AM
 
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We did EC with ds starting at 7months, and he was poop trained 2 weeks later and pee trained by 15months. He has never pee'd at night though, even as a newborn, with the exception of a couple times when he has been having an allergic reaction to something and he woke up right away screaming about it.

Before he was born we had custody of my BIL for a year, who was 13 at the time, he wet the bed every single night. We too him to the doctor and it was some sort of kidney problem (which there was nothing we could do about). They said he might never outgrow that.

Little girl I babysit for is 5.5 and she has accidents unless her mom limits liquid before bed and then takes her potty a few hours after she goes to sleep.

I guess its different for everyone.


ETA: Maybe try cloth trainers instead of sposies, b/c kids can feel when they are wet more easily. And its cheaper!
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#25 of 28 Old 10-28-2010, 06:38 PM
 
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DD was out of diapers during the day when she was 2. She's 4.5 now and wakes up with a soaked pull-up every morning. Last year I got her cloth pull-ups, but she has since outgrown them and we are just using disposibles now. A month or so ago we made a specific effort to help her get up in the morning and go right to the bathroom before the big waking-up pee. She did it a few times and was quite pleased with herself (we all ignored the pee in the pull-up from the middle of the night), but then decided it wasn't worth the effort to haul herself out of her cozy bed first thing. So we dropped it for a while.
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#26 of 28 Old 10-29-2010, 04:39 PM
 
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My DD was wet nightly until a few months after her 4th birthday, totally day dry by 2 1/2. I was beginning to lament it would never end... But then one morning she woke up dry! And a few days later again, and within a few weeks she was 100% dry. DS will be 4 in January and he is wet nightly too. My DH and his brother were both night-wetters until they were school age, 6 and 7 I think? My MIL, by all accounts, handled it wonderfully. One day when DD was about 3 1/2 she pulled me aside and told me all about how she went to a urologist to talk about her DS's inability to be dry all night, and how he told her it would come with time and not to worry. My MIL was worried I would be stress-ey about it with DD and wanted me to know it was normal and she would be dry eventually. And she is! Way before her Dad was!

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#27 of 28 Old 10-30-2010, 09:07 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Update: Last night, DD2 said she wanted to wear underwear to bed. So I made sure she peed before bed, put an extra pad on top of her sheets, and we took her to pee at 11pm when we went to bed. She woke up around 1:30am to pee, and woke up dry this morning! I know that it will still probably be a long road, but I'm so excited!

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#28 of 28 Old 10-30-2010, 10:32 AM
 
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Just my experience: DS was out of pull-ups during the day at 3. He was out of pull-ups at night about 2 months ago, at 4 1/2. We stopped using the pull-ups when he was dry for 2 weeks in the morning. We have had 2 mornings where he's peed in bed since then.

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