My DD snuck candy and then got sick-how to handle tonight? - Mothering Forums

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Old 10-31-2010, 02:15 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My 8 year old has a history of sneaking desserts. Last night she was at a friends house for a slumber party and halloween party, and snuck a lot of candy-so much so in fact that she got sick in the middle of the night and puked a whole bunch.


So tonight is trick or treating...how should we handle it? Obviously what I want to do is say she gets no candy at all. But I wonder if that is a bit excessive?

Also-the larger issue here is that she is in habit of sneaking desserts and candy and then lying about it and/or getting sick from it. How do I help her stop this behaviour? I am worried that it's already too late and this is the kind of thing that leads to eating/addiction disorders.


help! what would you do?

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Old 10-31-2010, 02:24 PM
 
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My first thought is why is she sneaking these things? Do you heavily limit them? Why is it considered "sneaking" to begin with? does she not have access to the food in the house without rules?

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Old 10-31-2010, 02:33 PM
 
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I'd be afraid that not letting her have candy tonight would just increase her inclination to eat as many sweets as possible when they are available for fear that someone will come along and remove the opportunity. Knowing these things are always available makes it easier to not obsess over them. But I know it's more complicated than that...

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Old 10-31-2010, 02:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Here are a few examples:

1. I made a special 'pudding' dessert for our family plus a close family friend-our friend had to postpone her visit by a day, so I set our friends dessert aside in the fridge.(they were all individual in these little glasses we have) everyone in my family got one of their own, including my daughter. Later that evening I found our friend's dessert had been eaten into-and it was apparent that she had tried to sneak the bites 'evenly' so maybe no one would notice-but of course I did notice. First she lied about it, then she finally admitted it. She had no reason for doing it, except that she couldn't help herself.

2. Made a tiramisu for dessert the following evening (requires being made the day before) She asked for some, and I explained that it had to be in the fridge overnight for it to be done (I make this dish 'often' so she knows I always make it the night before) but she could have a different dessert and could have some tiramisu the following day. The next day I found a section eaten of the tiramisu. Again, tried to lie about it, but admitted eating it-again, she said she could not help herself.

3. Her birthday-she requested an ice cream cake-I made it and one smaller cake for celebration with additional family a day later-She got to eat her ice cream cake and told me she wanted the other cake-I told her we had to wait, plus she already got to have plenty of ice cream cake (And candy that my sister brought for her) Yet again, found section taken out of cake-same old story.

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Old 10-31-2010, 02:39 PM - Thread Starter
 
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At the party last night, there were cupcakes for all the kids-everyone was allowed one, and then they gave out little bags of candy (a moderate amount) for each kid.

she kept trying to sneak additional cupcake, but couldn't due to adults catching her.

then she snuck a bunch of additional candy-so much in fact that she woke up in the middle of the night and got very sick and lots of throwing up involved.

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Old 10-31-2010, 02:46 PM
 
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it sounds like the issues is only happening when the sweets are off-limits. if that's the case I would tell her that she can eat as much of the candy as she wants, but if she gets sick from eating too much it will go away (and if she does get sick I would throw away any uneaten candy). and then, since this already sounds like it has become a severe issue, I might seek professional help with it, because it is already an impulse control issue or eating disorder (or a little bit of both)

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Old 10-31-2010, 02:48 PM
 
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I don't know, I guess my solution would be allow her more opportunities to have small amounts of these desserts... When you make pudding, you could put a little extra aside in a small bowl for her, or let her lick the beaters... Give her small tastes of things so she's not going crazy with the anticipation??? I am a lot like your daughter. I made DH a birthday cake a few weeks ago & it took ALL MY WILLPOWER not to sneak a slice since I made it the day before. And I'm an adult, so it's easier for me to control myself. I was always the kid at bday parties that wanted a second piece of cake. I actually eat incredibly healthy & am not overweight (a bit underweight actually), but I have a big sweet tooth & need small amounts of 'treats' or else I go nuts eating everything else. I should add a disclaimer that I did have an eating disorder years ago so I don't know if this is residual eating disordered behaviour or if it's just how some people normally are, but I guess I'm just trying to give some perspective from the other side of this.

Anyway, we don't do trick-or-treating & we don't eat candy in our house (though certainly lots of homemade sweets!) but if the custom in your home is to allow her to enjoy some Halloween candy, I think it would be really harsh to just take that away from her & likely only lead to more sneaking ultimately... I would ask her how she thinks you guys could handle this. Tell her you are concerned that she will overindulge & get sick again, and see if she has some ideas to prevent that from happening...

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Old 10-31-2010, 03:10 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I don't know, I guess my solution would be allow her more opportunities to have small amounts of these desserts... When you make pudding, you could put a little extra aside in a small bowl for her, or let her lick the beaters... Give her small tastes of things so she's not going crazy with the anticipation???
well in all these instances she WAS given her individual portion, the same amount everyone else got-the 'extra' was there for people that were going to come over the next day, or were not able to make it in that day.

I try not to be too limiting, because I dont want to create an environment that makes her want to overindulge in order to compensate for not getting 'treats'.

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Old 10-31-2010, 03:19 PM
 
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i am not getting a sense of what the candy rules are in your house.

instead of telling her she cant, with the examples you gave i would say ask her to make sure everyone has their own serving. focus on how we need to keep for everyone.

however what is the rule in your house when its not events and you havent made cake.

at 8 i am a bit surprised by her reaction. does she not get candy or dessert through out the week. dd goes thru binges. she wants icecream after dinner every night for a few days and then she can go thru weeks without wanting any.

otherwise if she IS getting candy and dessert regularly two things come to mind.

1. test for diabetes (after looking for other symptoms - i recall my gma, my parents had to lock the fridge because she craved it so much).
2. up or increase your protein amount. sometimes they say a body's need for protein show up as sugar if they havent got enough protein in them.

otherwise i would give her opportunities to overindulge a few times. that's how my dd learnt to never over indulge. you could leave a huge bowl of skittles in front of her at 3 and she'd maybe eat a handful. because she'd eaten chocolate cake a little while earlier and gotten sick over it.

even today somedays she wants more dessert. and asks for it. and i give it to her. because it doesnt become an everyday habit.

we have been having a huge sweet time since the last couple fo days. no candy but dd's been eating cookies and cakes. last night after we came home she wanted icecream. i didnt say no. i said you make the decision. you have already had a lot of cookies, cake, brownies and liquid sugar (juice). if you think its a good decision for your body to add more sugar since we will have even more tomorrow then go ahead. she didnt serve herself some ice cream.

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Old 10-31-2010, 03:26 PM
 
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I honestly think this is a larger problem and you should not link it to Halloween. So I'd let her trick or treat and have whatever the regular amount of candy she would be allowed tonight. (As long as you're sure it wasn't a stomach bug. )

Then in a week or so I guess my approach would be to take her out on our own and have a talk with her about how concerned I am, and ask HER to brainstorm ideas for how not to sneak treats.

I will say that I went through a phase of compulsive eating both at her age and in my teens; I think a lot of it was emotional, so looking at what things she gets to do to "fill her well" so to speak might help. Maybe she needs other ways to deal with emotion.

But I ALSO think both those periods intersected with big growth periods, so I was also hard-wired at those times to obsess over food.

Some ideas for her would be:

- can you get her involved in baking healthier but still sweet things so that she gets the whole process - healthy muffins, trail mix cookies and that kind of thing

- what can she eat that is sweeter but not dessert...does your budget allow for grapes (frozen grapes are amazing); can she have smoothies with fruit and honey, frozen yoghurt pops etc.

Both these things are to deregulate some of the sweet things so she knows what to have when she's having a craving, but also to make her more responsible for coming up with them, understanding nutritional value, and so on. So it would be something to work on together.

Also

- is there a way to set up some special treats for her that she knows are coming...my son was getting obsessed with dessert and it was bothering me, about a month ago, so we instituted "Sunday sundaes" where we make our own sundaes on - yes - Sunday. Now when he's all onto wanting this or that we remind him that Sunday sundaes are coming...but he's 5 so this technique may not apply. (We do have dessert more often than once a week but it's usually fruit etc.)
- does she have some control over something like an allowance where she can buy one thing a week or whatever

It does sound though like she overeats when she does KNOW the treat is still coming the next day, so I think you really will have to ask her what is going on and how to help her.

Oh P.S. - I agree with upping the protein and whole grains to reduce carb cravings.

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Old 10-31-2010, 03:26 PM
 
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I think letting her go crazy then getting puking sick was a perfect opportunity for her to learn WHY sweets are good in moderate amounts, and not so good when pigged out upon.

My DD is a full on candy freak, partly because we really have to limit her consumption due to her getting spun and making it extremely difficult to deal with her. My ILs have candy everywhere, so awhile back DH and I decided we were sick.to.death. of being the candy police, so we let DD have a free-for-all and a b-day party. DD ate a bunch of candy, ice cream cake, and a cupcake....she ended up puking when we got home. We both were just like "remember Little Bear and his sweet tooth?"(great Little Bear episode where he gets sick from eating too many sweets). She finally realized the why behind our watching her with the sweets.

Many may think this was a bad way to go about it, but when you have a child who does.not.stop. like my DD you get to the point where it's like fine do what you do, if you don't want to eat grow food and eat junk well there are consequences for that. We see my ILs often and they all think I am the sugar police, but they have so much candy, cake, cookies that the kids are all crying and melting down. I get sick of it because DD goes freakin crazy, and Dh and I have to battle constantly. This time I was just tired of that because it wasn't working. Getting sick actually made her realize that it was because we were concerned about her health, not being mean.

That's my take on it.

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Old 10-31-2010, 03:46 PM
 
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Wow...I'm surprised at all the people who say to let her have whatever she wants. I think sneaking food is pretty serious. It doesn't sound like she is limited at all, it honestly sounds like the sugar has a "power" over her (almost like a drug addict). Especially since it sounds like she mostly sneak sweets once she has that "first" taste.

I think it's really sad that a little girl is so consumed with friend she's spending her energy trying to sneak cupcakes and candy at a party, instead of enjoying time with her friends.

I would take her tricking her treating, but tell her she isn't going to eat any candy. She can trade it all in, and the next day you will take her shopping for a new toys, or book or clothes (whatever she likes). (or take her shopping before hand today, and just doesn't give her the new toy until after trick or treating when she trades her candy in). That way she KNOWS she will get the toy or whatever.

Then I would seriously look into sugar addiction issues and do some major research and maybe therapy.

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Old 10-31-2010, 04:01 PM
 
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OP, it sounds like your DD may have a greater issue that needs to be explored with a professional. At first, I was sure your post was going to be about a child who's never given any sweets but from what you're saying she's allowed sweets and a nice amount. She was allowed pudding and not only snuck the desserts for your guests but tried to cover it. And also the sneaking the extra cupcake at the home of the hosts of the sleepover even though everyone was given a nice amount. Is she only this way with sweets or other foods as well.

I wouldn't allow her to go trick or treating or eat trick or treat candy. I'd be concerned that there's a greater issue going on and would work on exploring what that may be.
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Old 10-31-2010, 04:14 PM
 
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To be honest, I wouldn't keep her from having any candy at all tonight as a punishment per se- I think vomiting and the embarrassment of doing it at a sleepover are plenty awful! I would put whatever your normal limits are on Halloween candy in place. I would also start a dialog with her, asking her what she thinks-not just telling her, about health, about sharing with other people, etc (what other people have said). I would also consider what emotional/stressful issues she may be facing. I was always sneaking food and desserts as a kid, looking back I don't think it had anything with hunger/or the sugar itself. I enjoyed healthy food, but I would not resist desserts/tasty left overs. It was stress, pure and simple, my family/school relationships were strained and eating momentarily solved it. These days I am consciously aware of the relationship between stress/eating, but I still struggle not to eat all the ice cream in less that 24 hours. That may not be the case with her at all, but its worth considering. I would also really try to get her to realize the relationship between what she puts in her body and how she feels later. I really like all the suggestions about asking her to come up with solutions. Good luck!
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Old 10-31-2010, 04:33 PM
 
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To be honest, I wouldn't keep her from having any candy at all tonight as a punishment per se- I think vomiting and the embarrassment of doing it at a sleepover are plenty awful! I would put whatever your normal limits are on Halloween candy in place. I would also start a dialog with her, asking her what she thinks-not just telling her, about health, about sharing with other people, etc (what other people have said). I would also consider what emotional/stressful issues she may be facing. I was always sneaking food and desserts as a kid, looking back I don't think it had anything with hunger/or the sugar itself. I enjoyed healthy food, but I would not resist desserts/tasty left overs. It was stress, pure and simple, my family/school relationships were strained and eating momentarily solved it. These days I am consciously aware of the relationship between stress/eating, but I still struggle not to eat all the ice cream in less that 24 hours. That may not be the case with her at all, but its worth considering. I would also really try to get her to realize the relationship between what she puts in her body and how she feels later. I really like all the suggestions about asking her to come up with solutions. Good luck!

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Old 10-31-2010, 04:41 PM
 
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it sounds like the issues is only happening when the sweets are off-limits. if that's the case I would tell her that she can eat as much of the candy as she wants, but if she gets sick from eating too much it will go away (and if she does get sick I would throw away any uneaten candy). and then, since this already sounds like it has become a severe issue, I might seek professional help with it, because it is already an impulse control issue or eating disorder (or a little bit of both)
A good thought, but in this situation, I would be careful with this - you wouldn't want her to begin feeling like she needs to hide the fact that she gets sick - I think that's what would happen - she would not only hide the eating, but also hide when she gets sick (or even worse, figure out that she might be able to make herself vomit or something so she never feels the sick part and doesn't have to have things taken away - probably a scenario that is very unlikely...)

Tonight we're going to try the whole 'Halloween Fairy" thing though - I'll let the kids choose a few pieces of candy and then give them the option to leave the rest out for the halloween fairy, who will exchange it for an awesome toy they've been wanting Along with some special snacks that are a little more acceptable.

I'd just try to make sure that you do everything you can to keep the trust up - you don't want her to feel so ashamed that she stops telling you the truth. Maybe start by sitting down and asking the reason why she sneaks food - is she actually hungry? bored? does is make her feel good when she's feeling sad or stressed? Maybe include a story about how you yourself sometime abuse food (I feel like most people do at least to some degree) and that you can understand. Once you can identify the 'why' - you can start introducing other ways to handle those things that don't involve unhealthy food.

good luck tonight
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Old 10-31-2010, 05:01 PM
 
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My first thought is why is she sneaking these things? Do you heavily limit them? Why is it considered "sneaking" to begin with? does she not have access to the food in the house without rules?
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I'd be afraid that not letting her have candy tonight would just increase her inclination to eat as many sweets as possible when they are available for fear that someone will come along and remove the opportunity. Knowing these things are always available makes it easier to not obsess over them. But I know it's more complicated than that...
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it sounds like the issues is only happening when the sweets are off-limits.
During special occasions where candy is aplenty, I allow my kids to have their own candy in bags with their name on it and put it in the pantry with all the other food. I say they can eat it after they've eaten healthy food for breakfast. I then say, you can choose to eat it all if you want to, but make sure you stop if your tummy starts to hurt, or you can eat some of it after breakfast and save the rest for later. Since I put the power and control in their hands, and encourage them to make their own choices, more often than not, they make a healthy choice, and if not, I don't worry about it.

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Old 10-31-2010, 05:37 PM
 
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OP, it sounds like your DD may have a greater issue that needs to be explored with a professional. At first, I was sure your post was going to be about a child who's never given any sweets but from what you're saying she's allowed sweets and a nice amount. She was allowed pudding and not only snuck the desserts for your guests but tried to cover it. And also the sneaking the extra cupcake at the home of the hosts of the sleepover even though everyone was given a nice amount.
I think I agree with this. I think that at age 8 most kids are very well able to understand that we need to save the extra dessert for *friend* for tomorrow, or tiramisu needs to set overnight, and they are able to control their desire to eat some of it. I also think that usually kids are better behaved at other peoples' houses, so it says something to me that she even went sneaking (lots of!) sweets at her friend's house. Does that make sense?

We already do the "Halloween Fairy" here and it works really well for our family. The kids choose a small bit of candy to keep and the rest is taken away by the fairy with a gift left in it's stead. If you don't already do it maybe this would be a good year to start (or simply say that you'll buy her a gift in exchange for the candy). I don't think I'd take away ToTing as it's such a huge, exciting big deal for kids that age. It seems like getting sick was "punishment" enough for sneaking the candy. BUT at the same time, since she's having such a big problem with sweets in general I'd probably choose to do a candy-for-gift exchange for Halloween.

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Old 10-31-2010, 05:55 PM
 
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I suggest having her repay the people who had her over with her money, writing an apology note for stealing, and not allowing her to go over to friends houses until she can show she will not steal their things. Sneaking is a term that is too mild in this situation. She took what didn't belong to belong to her without permission after being told not to, and that is not acceptable guest behavior. I think canceling Halloween privileges is tough punishment, but it sounds like she has a long history of feeling like she has every right to just take without any concern for other people when it comes to sweets so I don't know that it is too much. If you feel like it is wrong though then it is probably not the right way to go for your family. I know that I have been tempted to take a holiday but haven't ever done it because it feels like too much.

It is hard to resist temptation as a child and what she did is totally age appropriate, especially for a child who really craves candy. I think you should label it as what it is though, sneaking is a silly mischievous behavior whereas stealing is not, and insist that she replaces anything she eats without permission with her own money. I can't imagine my child doing something like that on a continuous basis. How do you deal with her not listening to you in other situations? I think that you should treat this one the same way. Not limiting things may help, but even if you do limit things you should be able to trust that your child will not sneak into the food that is there for everyone no matter how much she wants it.

My mom was telling me about hearing Dr. Sear's talk on the radio about it being possible to retrain your taste buds. It sounds like she has a lot of access to treats and may benefit from the whole family doing away with them and retraining their taste buds together.
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Old 10-31-2010, 05:57 PM
 
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help! what would you do?
What we do is limit sweets since our DD seems unable to limit them herself.

For Halloween, she can choose 3 pieces each day after a healthy meal. The candy is kept out of her reach. I would lock it up if that was needed (its not, yet).

I would not make or buy desserts that can't be monitored until she is older, and hopefully when she gets older the inability to restrain herself will have lessened. If I needed to make such a dessert, I'd ask the neighbor to keep it in their fridge or house for me until it was time to serve it.

We do have something sweet to offer each day. She is not deprived of sweets. We no longer talk a whole lot about how much is good for the body. We just make sure she can't access more than what seems reasonable, and any further discussion that she attempts is met with a simple reminder ("tomorrow") and redirection to something else ("hey want to play on the trampoline?").

If DD is going to a slumber party, I'd let the parents know that there might be some candy-sneaking issues, not tell them how to deal with it (unless they want advice), and if she eats too much and gets sick, okay. She probably won't get invited to as many sleepovers, or the ones she does, they'll have better control over the sweets.

I think as DD gets older she will probably lose some of that craving and gain some more self-control, so I do think this is temporary.
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Old 10-31-2010, 06:28 PM
 
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I'd still let her trick or treat, and let her have her candy.

As kids, we kept our candy in our own rooms. You eat a bunch the first few days, then you get tired of it and it sits there til Christmas, and eventually someone throws it away.

I allow binge eating for holidays, and then one day, I throw the rest away. I don't tell anybody, I don't set a limit, I just get tired of Laffy taffy wrappers stuck the the dog's paws and go in and throw it all away. In 15 years, nobody has ever said "Hey, where's my candy?"

But, your other examples... especially the birthday cake would bother me too. I would not be happy if my child ate birthday cake that was set aside for a specific date.
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Old 10-31-2010, 06:47 PM
 
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My 9yo is in a sneaking food phase, and after raising her older siblings through it already, I can assure you this sounds in the realm of normal and ok, and I don't think it's a huge deal unless a huge deal is made of it.

I think with the 'getting into something ahead of time' you simply say Oh, it looks like you already had your helping of Tiramasu, no worries-you can have some more with us another time. The issue isn't really FOOD as much as it's respect for boundaries on that issue.

Eating junk to the point of being sick, from my experience, can happen from time to time in kids that don't self regulate well. It's a self teaching experience, it sucks, and the rare times it's happened in our home they are expected to clean their own mess up.

The bigger issue you make out of this, the bigger issue it will become. I don't think it's an eating disorder issue yet, but I think if it's made into a big thing, it could become one.

My 9yo started doing this about 6 months ago, so right around the same age as your daughter. We definitely increased her protein intake, and increased snack times, and that helped. We also didn't really make an issue out of it, other than addressing matter of factly that A) food in the bedroom isn't ok, because of the bug potential and B) please take a serving and leave plenty for others

I'm happy to say she's getting MUCH better about this. Seeing her gradually learn to self regulate is an awesome experience, certainly isn't happening overnight, but I'm confident as she grows up she won't be nearly as messed up about this sort of thing as I had to be for a while.

When I was a kid I did this exact thing. I do not have an eating disorder, but my mom FLIPPED out that I was doing it, and all her lecturing and freaking out did was make me MORE sneaky about getting into treats. I'm actively working to parent my kids with a MUCH more balanced perspective!

Oh, and no, I don't recommend she be banned from Halloween treats. If you don't want her to have them than don't go trick or treating, but don't let her have the 'fun' of collecting it just to micromanage it afterwards, talk about a recipe for disaster!

Hope that helps mama, good luck and let me know if you have any questions?

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Old 10-31-2010, 07:14 PM
 
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It sounds to me like she's had the natural consequence of binging on candy -- getting sick. She also had the embarrassment of throwing up in front of her friends. So, tonight, I would just gently remind her that her tummy might not be able to handle that much sugar all at once and let it go.

I agree that this sounds more like a "respect for others" issue in terms of sneaking others' portions than it does like an eating issue. People have had a lot of good ideas about way to approach it.

If it helps, I've got one child who self-regulates very well and one who doesn't. My one who doesn't eats most of the candy she likes in the first 2-3 days, and then the rest of it sits. While I'm not too happy about the pace at which she eats the stuff she likes, I'm at least moderately pleased that she doesn't keep eating things she doesn't like. She'd sell her soul for bubblegum, but can pass up Hershey's Kisses without a blink. I think if you don't make it too much of a big deal, then your daughter will find her boundaries.

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Old 10-31-2010, 07:40 PM
 
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In my own experience as well as what I've observed in others, food issues are almost always emotionally-based. There's probably something going on in her emotional world that's causing her to crave extra sweets, especially if she's not supposed to eat them. I suggest helping her getting to the root...ask her questions about how she feels when she's feeling the urge to eat extra sweets. Maybe think back to when this first started and see if there was anything going on in her life at that time that may have triggered this issue (like a move, starting a new school, etc.). It sounds like this is her method for self-soothing...maybe try helping her soothe herself in different ways. You might offer that when she's feeling this way, when she craves extra sweets, to come to you first and share how she's feeling. If she sees that you're non-judgmental about it and you truly do just want to help her feel better then this may work. Then when she comes to you, obviously, give her the soothing she needs, through talking, touch, etc.
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Old 10-31-2010, 07:43 PM
 
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In my own experience as well as what I've observed in others, food issues are almost always emotionally-based. There's probably something going on in her emotional world that's causing her to crave extra sweets, especially if she's not supposed to eat them.
Possibly, although I'd also look at her sleep. I forgot to put in my previous post to look at her sleep. The #1 cause of my overeating is being tired. When you're tired, your body craves a quick energy boost. Guess what provides that the fastest?

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Old 10-31-2010, 07:52 PM
 
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I would let her TOT, and discuss helping her eat a responsible amount daily.

A couple of thoughts...it sounds like when she eats sweet foods, is when she wants and sneaks more. I wonder if for some reason her threshold for feeling sated is higher.

Would it be possible to perhaps have dessert less often, but sometimes let her eat what amount feels right? So she doesn't feel like dessert is always "never enough".

I would also be concerned about emotional eating. I only know my experience, but for me sneaking & stealing food was the #1 sign that I was being abused.
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Old 10-31-2010, 11:20 PM
 
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Possibly, although I'd also look at her sleep. I forgot to put in my previous post to look at her sleep. The #1 cause of my overeating is being tired. When you're tired, your body craves a quick energy boost. Guess what provides that the fastest?
This.
I've had sugar issues my whole life, and I've found a billion reasons to blame myself for it. I've only realized in the last few years that most of my problem is exhaustion. Some of it is habit (now), and some of it is emotional, but most of it is just plain fatigue.

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Old 11-01-2010, 06:33 AM
 
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Perhaps Hypoglycemia. Just a possibility - as I have it, and DS has it (he is 6). DH and DD (3) do not have it, and their reaction to sugary food is very different. Your DDDs behaviour sounds like mine. As a child, this went undiagnosed, but sugar did react in my brain very strongly - I got high off it. Wow, that felt REALLY, REALLY, REALLY great. So I wanted, NEEDED, to get high again. To the point of sneaking to Majic Market, hiding candy under the windowstill, licking icing of cake and trying to cover it up but not being able to control myself and eating more and more icing... I was never fat, in fact quite skinny, but I needed the high. Problem with the high was it was followed by a strong crash, and a deep low. In the low I would be barely functioning - a zombie. DS acts like me. DH and DD, although they like sweets, will never behave like this. DD will leave half a cookie if she is full. DS would eat 2 more if I let him, until he got sick.

My solution for myself and DS is that we are allowed sweets. BUT - huge BUT here - it must ALWAYS 100% of the time be with or directly after some stabilizing foods - something that will hold the sugar in check so we don't get the extreme highs, or the extreme lows. Cookies - bring them on - after we have had some chicken, broccoli and rice for dinner. Trick or treat candy in the afternoon - sure - if it is eaten with a large glass of milk and small whole-grain bread snack first.

The other thing is to keep the sugar balanced throughout the day. So no long stretches without food at all. I'd rather he have a small snack in the afternoon and eat less dinner, then wait an extra 2 hours and have his sugar so low that he is crashing. Because at the crash point is when sugar is desired above everything else in the world - and that is exactly when you should not have it, because your sugar is so low it will shoot back up into an extreme high, only to crash to an extreme low - and then the circle continues... The afternoon snack doesn't have to be junk - carrot sticks, peanuts, slices of cheese.... And lastly a glass of OJ first thing in the morning, so that our brains can function enough to actually eat our breakfast.

I'm not saying this is what it is with your DD. But a possibility worth checking out. You could try a test - making sure she has stabilizing foods for say 3 weeks, no long time between meals, junk food and sugar only combined with other healthy items, very healthy stablizing breakfast quickly in the morning to get the brain functioning.... see how her mood swings and sugar desires are at the end of this period.
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Old 11-01-2010, 09:06 AM
 
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Perhaps Hypoglycemia. Just a possibility - as I have it, and DS has it (he is 6). DH and DD (3) do not have it, and their reaction to sugary food is very different. Your DDDs behaviour sounds like mine. As a child, this went undiagnosed, but sugar did react in my brain very strongly - I got high off it. Wow, that felt REALLY, REALLY, REALLY great. So I wanted, NEEDED, to get high again. To the point of sneaking to Majic Market, hiding candy under the windowstill, licking icing of cake and trying to cover it up but not being able to control myself and eating more and more icing... I was never fat, in fact quite skinny, but I needed the high. Problem with the high was it was followed by a strong crash, and a deep low. In the low I would be barely functioning - a zombie. DS acts like me. DH and DD, although they like sweets, will never behave like this. DD will leave half a cookie if she is full. DS would eat 2 more if I let him, until he got sick.

My solution for myself and DS is that we are allowed sweets. BUT - huge BUT here - it must ALWAYS 100% of the time be with or directly after some stabilizing foods - something that will hold the sugar in check so we don't get the extreme highs, or the extreme lows. Cookies - bring them on - after we have had some chicken, broccoli and rice for dinner. Trick or treat candy in the afternoon - sure - if it is eaten with a large glass of milk and small whole-grain bread snack first.

The other thing is to keep the sugar balanced throughout the day. So no long stretches without food at all. I'd rather he have a small snack in the afternoon and eat less dinner, then wait an extra 2 hours and have his sugar so low that he is crashing. Because at the crash point is when sugar is desired above everything else in the world - and that is exactly when you should not have it, because your sugar is so low it will shoot back up into an extreme high, only to crash to an extreme low - and then the circle continues... The afternoon snack doesn't have to be junk - carrot sticks, peanuts, slices of cheese.... And lastly a glass of OJ first thing in the morning, so that our brains can function enough to actually eat our breakfast.

I'm not saying this is what it is with your DD. But a possibility worth checking out. You could try a test - making sure she has stabilizing foods for say 3 weeks, no long time between meals, junk food and sugar only combined with other healthy items, very healthy stablizing breakfast quickly in the morning to get the brain functioning.... see how her mood swings and sugar desires are at the end of this period.
Was thinking the exact same thing. (my son is also hypoglycemic)

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Old 11-01-2010, 11:07 AM
 
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It seems to me that you guys have sweets *a lot*. We have dessert maybe once a month, though we do have fresh fruit always available. As a pp said, it's often about re-training taste buds. I've made significant dietary changes in the past year, and now I cannot stand the taste of some things I used to eat. I did often feel I craved those things. I wonder if by having desserts all the time, you're not encouraging the habit. Perhaps if you all worked on cutting them out and then adding in whole food sweets, the problem may resolve itself. It really is at the point that none of us like most store birthday cakes & cupcakes, and trust me, DS & I both had serious cravings for sweets.

The stealing of food (in the case of her friend's house) or sneaking it (at your house) is something I'd address separately from the actual food issue.

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