Moving a three year-old to her own bed - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 6 Old 08-07-2011, 10:49 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi Jessica~

 

I'm not sure if you work with cosleeping issues... but here's my question. We have been cosleeping with our three year old since birth. 6 months ago her sister was born and I've been cosleeping with her as well. Both my husband and I have made the decision to move her into her own bed, in her own room. The first night went great. She slept thru the whole night as she was commonly doing when sleeping with us. The next 5 or 6 nights she woke up once and I went in and laid in bed with her until she fell back asleep. However, the last 2-3 nights she's been waking every couple of hours, about 3x per night and then at dawn. Between that and her sister waking to nurse, I'm not getting any restful sleep. None of us are really. I'm considering putting a toddler bed in our room and see if that would work better as a stepping stone. We have a night light in her room and leave her door and our door open.

 

Any advice is greatly appreciated! Thank you so much for your time : )

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#2 of 6 Old 08-07-2011, 11:05 PM
 
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Dear Caralan,

 

Thank you for your question. I do work with co-sleeping issues. I will post my answer within a few days.


All the best,

 

Jessica

 

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#3 of 6 Old 08-08-2011, 06:13 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Great thanks Jessica. I can't wait to hear from you! Also, I guess I should mention that I lie with her until she falls asleep (sing and pat her back)... which takes about 10-15 mins. In case that information is useful to you. Thank you!shy.gif

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#4 of 6 Old 08-12-2011, 01:16 PM
 
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Dear Friend,

 

Thank you for writing in about this co-sleeping question.

 

Having a new baby in the family is generally a big transition for the first born and whatever you can do to make her feel welcome and included will be beneficial for all involved. (Click here for more on this.)

 

As well, try to create reoccurring daytime rituals of connection to help her ability to "let go" into sustained sleep at night. Click here for rituals of connection.

 

If you wanted your eldest daughter to follow through with the sleep transition of being in her own bed in her own room, I would advise towards that end. As well, if you wanted your daughter to fall asleep on her own, I have suggestions for that. But since you are fine with putting her to sleep and continuing a co-sleeping dynamic, I agree with your idea to move her bed back into your room.

 

Here are more ideas:

 

Place a second bed in your room; either the toddler bed, a twin bed that lines up with your bed or a futon on the floor (a futon can be folded into a couch or can slide under your bed during the day.)

 

You can put both of your daughters to sleep at once on your bed by cuddling your first born under one arm and nursing your 6-month old on the other side. After your daughters are asleep, transfer your first born to the second bed so there is more room on your bed. 

 

Or, you can tuck your first born into her bed to fall asleep there while you nurse her sister to sleep in your bed. Perhaps sing a couple of lullabies so both girls are comforted by your voice as your body lays with your youngest. Or, if Dad is home, perhaps he can lay with your first while you nurse the baby to sleep.

 

I would suggest you read this L.O.V.E. Parenting article about the bedtime routine to help create an environment of success for sleeping. 

 

Another idea for co-sleeping that creates separate space for “mom and dad” is the idea of the sibling bed. Once your second born daughter is a little older, you can put your girls to sleep on their own double mattress. Click here to read more about the sibling bed. 

 

Lastly, in the Fall I am releasing the L.O.V.E. Parenting Home Study Course and one of the lessons is a comprehensive sleep theme. I think it could be of great benefit to you. It contains 8-essential parenting themes delivered to you with audio, video, text and written exercises. Anyone who is interested should email me at LoveParentingLA@gmail.com and I will send you information when it is available.

 

All the best,

Jessica

 

 

Birthing A New Mother home study program NOW AVAILABLE for pre-conception, pregnancy & the first year of motherhood. I am a featured contributor in this course brought to you by Conscious Motherhood.

The Ultimate Parenting Course will be available November 15, 2011. A cadre of the best of today’s progressive parenting experts come together in this transformational 8-week home study course for parents of children birth to 7 years. Email me at LoveParentingLA@gmail.com for pre-order.

The L.O.V.E. Parenting Birthkit has helped women have a transformational and empowering birth. Written exercises, audio & private coaching. Amazing for first or second pregnancy.

Sign Up for my E-Zine! Email: LoveParentingLA@gmail.com

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“All you have shared has helped tremendously.”—Lisa Bonet

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#5 of 6 Old 09-16-2011, 10:58 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you Jessica for this wonderful reply! I really appreciate your help and advice!

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#6 of 6 Old 09-21-2011, 09:48 AM
 
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Dear Caralan,

 

Thank you so much for writing in, it really means something to me to hear from you.

 

All my best,

 

Jessica

 

 

 

Birthing A New Mother home study program NOW AVAILABLE for pre-conception, pregnancy & the first year of motherhood. I am a featured contributor in this course brought to you by Conscious Motherhood.

The Ultimate Parenting Course will be available November 15, 2011. A cadre of the best of today’s progressive parenting experts come together in this transformational 8-week home study course for parents of children birth to 7 years. Email me at LoveParentingLA@gmail.com for pre-order.

The L.O.V.E. Parenting Birthkit has helped women have a transformational and empowering birth. Written exercises, audio & private coaching. Amazing for first or second pregnancy.

Sign Up for my E-Zine! Email: LoveParentingLA@gmail.com

Like me on Facebook L.O.V.E. Parenting and Follow on Twitter @LoveParenting

Private Coaching Session! Phone or Los Angeles office. www.LoveParentingLA.com

 

“Truly amazing woman. I love her advice.”—Carrie-Anne Moss

“All you have shared has helped tremendously.”—Lisa Bonet

“I am experiencing nothing short of a miracle thanks to your laser beam approach.” –Andrea Bendewald

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