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#1 of 15 Old 01-18-2012, 02:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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My question is 3 pronged: 

1. Do you believe in ghosts? 

2. Have you had issues with your pre-schooler being scared of ghosts to the point that they won't be alone in the bright living room in the middle of the day if you're in another room of the house? 

3. Would you lie and say there were no such thing as ghosts if you believed there might be or that no one really knows, just to make him quit being freaked out?

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#2 of 15 Old 01-18-2012, 02:51 PM
 
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I believe in ghosts, and I will do what it takes to make my kids feel comfortable if that means they want all the lights on in their room and hallway then so be it.  However we talked about it already since DD2 was a bit frightened about ghosts and monsters and I just told her that we all have ghosts and monsters around and their job is to keep us safe.  When she was three she bought it but as she got older she completely forgot about it.  No longer afraid.  However, come on even as an adult I'd crap my pants if I thought there was an apparition in my room

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#3 of 15 Old 01-18-2012, 07:35 PM
 
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I don't have any personal experience with this, but this reminded me of two things which I figured I'd mention to help get the discussion rolling....

 

One, I remember another mom on here saying she had to lie to her daughter and say there were no bobcats in the area they were going, because the daughter was anxious about a bobcat attacking. Seems many kids have trouble distinguishing anything from "theoretically possible, but incredibly unlikely to happen" to "almost guaranteed to happen." I totally sympathized with the mom's choice to lie, even though I generally don't think it's okay to lie to kids.

 

Second, I know when I become anxious for some reason, my anxiety will often manifest in ways unrelated to the trigger. Like I'll watch a movie with zombies, and for the next couple hours I'll be really paranoid by the toilet or floor-level kitchen cabinets. (I guess I'm expecting something like large cockroaches to be hiding under the edge I can't see, but it's really pretty irrational.) With that in mind, you might try comforting the child in ways that don't particularly pertain to ghosts.

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#4 of 15 Old 01-18-2012, 07:38 PM
 
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1. Do you believe in ghosts?

I do. I have had my own experiences, mostly while I was younger.

2. Have you had issues with your pre-schooler being scared of ghosts to the point that they won't be alone in the bright living room in the middle of the day if you're in another room of the house?

Not really afraid. She has seen things, and we've explained that ghosts were once people just like us. It makes it less scary to think of them as people that won't harm you.

3. Would you lie and say there were no such thing as ghosts if you believed there might be or that no one really knows, just to make him quit being freaked out?

I don't think I'd lie about it. I think that education is usually a better option.

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#5 of 15 Old 01-18-2012, 08:42 PM
 
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1. Do you believe in ghosts?
I think ghosts may exist.


2. Have you had issues with your pre-schooler being scared of ghosts to the point that they won't be alone in the bright living room in the middle of the day if you're in another room of the house?
Yes.


3. Would you lie and say there were no such thing as ghosts if you believed there might be or that no one really knows, just to make him quit being freaked out?

No. I talked with DD about experiences I had when I was younger. When I was a teenager, I lived in a house we were nearly certain was haunted by the previous owner who had died there. I told her that even though I was a lot older than her, I was really scared sometimes, but that nothing bad ever happened. Then we talked a lot about some of the funny and not so scary stuff that happened surrounding that possible haunting (like the owner's cat who still stuck around the property and loved catnip, and some of the antics that our cat pulled that we attributed to the ghost), about who the woman was in life, and what she might have been like. Stepping back from the inital scariness of ghosts and thinking about that they were once living people like us with lives and people (and animals) who loved them made a big difference for DD.

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#6 of 15 Old 01-18-2012, 11:46 PM
 
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1. yes

2. yes

3. no. 

 

dd is the very active imagination child. she can scare herself with her imagination. as a pser she has refused to walk down a street because she can see a ghost. however sometimes it was ghosts. sometimes its monsters. 

 

i have never tried to deny it because she isnt the kind of child who will take my word for it. as dd has reminded me many, many times - just because you cant see it does not mean it does not exist. 

 

however having said that i would say dd was way more afraid of monsters than ghosts. i think she has seen ghosts and find they are not all to be scared of. HAH! not for me. i am so scared of the visual that they never show up for me in the seen mode. 


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#7 of 15 Old 01-19-2012, 01:02 PM
 
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1.  Do you believe in ghosts?

 

I had some very intense experiences when I was between three and six which are unexplainable.  I would say that I think there are beings which exist in a parallel universe which sometime get trapped here.  I don't think they are ghosts as defined in a traditional sense, but forces which are beyond our experience and understanding.

 

2.  Have you had issues with your preschooler being scared of ghosts...?

 

She went through a period between 2 and 3 where she was afraid.  We used the water spritzer method. 

 

3.  Would lie and say there were no such thing as ghosts if you believed there might be or that no one really knows...?

 

No, I was pretty direct with her and told her that we didn't know, and that I had my own experiences when I was little.  She seemed to take comfort in the idea that my experiences were positive, not scary. 


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#8 of 15 Old 01-19-2012, 04:27 PM
 
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Not sure if I believe in ghosts, but I definitely believe in spirits.  My children understand the differences between ghosts and spirits and they think that ghosts are not real.  We taught our children to not be afraid of spirits because spirits come back to give us important messages or watch over us.


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#9 of 15 Old 01-22-2012, 09:46 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Elena88 View Post

My question is 3 pronged: 

1. Do you believe in ghosts? 

2. Have you had issues with your pre-schooler being scared of ghosts to the point that they won't be alone in the bright living room in the middle of the day if you're in another room of the house? 

3. Would you lie and say there were no such thing as ghosts if you believed there might be or that no one really knows, just to make him quit being freaked out?


1. Yes.

2. No.

3. No.

 

My DH and his whole family are.... "in tune" with I guess what you would call the spirit world. My SIL often catches glimpses of their mother in her house and my DH has reoccurring dreams of his their mother in which she is telling him what will happen in the new future. DSS also has the ability to see/ sense things going on. My uncle died of lung cancer in my parents house (where we live) in 2008. The room that DSS lives in was my uncle's room. There have been many times that DSS has complained that the "man with the beard" kept him up and wanted to play with him. He says that he dances and tells him funny stories. My uncle was a prankster and loved children. He had 5 of his own and three grandchildren.

 

When DH and I got together, DH had never seen a picture or even met my uncle. All he knew is that mom had lost one of her brothers. On his first night in our house, he was in my uncle's room and my uncle tugged at his long hair. Numerous times my uncle would tell my brother or my other cousins to "Cut your damn hair, boy" and smile. That's what he did to DH. My DH has also seen a full body apparition of my uncle and was able to describe him to my mother before ever seeing a picture of him.

 

DSS also has dreams of his Nanny, DH's mother. She passed 7 years ago. He tells us about how when he was bad sick (pyloric stenosis at 6 weeks) that his Nanny held him for a long, long time. He knows who she is and often points to her picture, then proceeds to tell us how he dreamed of her last night.My MIL does even mess with me from time to time, but only at SIL's house(the house she passed away in). And I have never had lights on and off at me for five minutes while trying to go to sleep other than being at her house. When I said, "Alright, Edna. I know that you are here and I want some sleep, mom" the lights stopped. 

 

All of our contact with "ghosts" has been of a benign nature. We would do anything to make DSS comfortable if he ever encountered something that made him freak out or be upset. But so far we have open communication with DSS on the subject and things have been fine. I accept the fact that some people don't believe this sort of thing. I just see it as part of the family I married into. 

 


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#10 of 15 Old 01-22-2012, 02:27 PM
 
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1. No

2. No. My kids are not generally afraid. But after seeing Monsters Inc. they were worried about monsters hiding out. So we looked under the bed, down the hall... 

3. I would explain that I do not believe in Ghosts, but that other people might believe in them. I would ask my DCs what they believe. Then talk about it. 

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#11 of 15 Old 01-22-2012, 09:19 PM
 
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1. I believe in spirits. We talk about spirits and how when people die there spirits are still with us and they watch over us and may help us.

2. DS is scarred to go into dark rooms and he is scarred of "ghosts" but he likes to talk about ghosts but he means the white ghosts that fly around like the ones depicted at Halloween

3. I have told him that ghosts are not real (the white Halloween ghosts) 


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#12 of 15 Old 01-28-2012, 12:50 PM
 
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1. Yes. I didn't believe in them until we moved into our current house; but there was quite a bit of activity for the first six months we lived here, including my then-2yo seeing and talking to something regularly.

 

2. My current 2yo is afraid of ghosts but this is due to his exposure to the old-school Scooby Doo cartoons. The "ghosts" he is afraid of are cartoon ghosts, not real ones.

 

3. I tell my kids that ghosts aren't real. Am I lying? Technically. But like I said above, the ghosts they're thinking of are cartoonish ghosts, which don't exist. If we were to experience more activity, it would be time for us to have a bigger conversation about the subject (my oldest, who was 2 when we moved in, has no recollection of anything that happened). I don't want to unnecessarily freak my kids out.


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#13 of 15 Old 01-30-2012, 09:34 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cyllya View Post

 

One, I remember another mom on here saying she had to lie to her daughter and say there were no bobcats in the area they were going, because the daughter was anxious about a bobcat attacking. Seems many kids have trouble distinguishing anything from "theoretically possible, but incredibly unlikely to happen" to "almost guaranteed to happen." I totally sympathized with the mom's choice to lie, even though I generally don't think it's okay to lie to kids.

 


This.  We drive up a road that goes through a canyon almost daily and it has a "watch for falling rocks" sign on it that has a graphic of a rock dropping onto a car.  FREAKED my son out when he was about 4.  If he'd had his way we would have taken the road that takes about 20 min longer to avoid the falling rocks. 

 

I agree with many of pp that lying and saying there are no ghosts when you believe in spirits, etc, is not really lying since your kids' "ghost" and what you've experienced as a spirit are probably different things.

 

My son did have a time when he wouldn't go in his room, but to be honest, I think it was justified.  He also had a point when he was in first grade last year where we had to check his pulse about 50 times a day because he was convinced his heart would stop.  I'm not sure where this came from, either a friend said something, or they talked about something in school but he was obsessed.  He would wake up in the middle of the night crying and went to the school nurse once because he was so scared that he was going to die. 


In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you." Buddha

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#14 of 15 Old 01-30-2012, 12:32 PM
 
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I need to get ready to run out the door but I wanted to stop (in case I forget later!) and say please don't lie to your child about it to make it go away. Kids who see things that we don't are usually pretty fragile about it and it seriously shake the foundation of her self esteem/self worth. Plus, if she is truly scared, she's scared and ignoring that or telling her what she's afraid of doesn't exist is only going to upset her more. 

 

I do have to run, but I will try to get back to this thread later!!


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#15 of 15 Old 01-31-2012, 04:24 AM
 
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1. I don't believe in ghosts, I know them to exists. I know where a very friendly ghost lives; everyone who lives/lived at that house is happy and prosperous in that order.

 

2. Bad ghosts don't care what time of day it is. They're most active at night but their highly negative energy most certainly can creep out an adult and freak out a kid. I still get the creeps thinking about the basement of one house I lived in. How bad was it? I'm overcome with the urge to run out of my house as I type!

 

3. I didn't see ghosts as a kid, but no way would I marginalize my kid, or any kid, or even lie about it. Like everything else, there are positives and negatives. Personally, I think the negative ghosts left this life with deep, serious regrets or unresolved issues. Life here is simply awesome when I cut through the daily BS and various energy levels.

 

Heard of the legend of kokopelli? I know it to be true. There's no explanation for my experience in the summer of 2001. My sweetheart and I heard the most amazing "music" that defies description or categorization. Kids can be extremely sensitive to some energy aspects, and tone deaf to others.

 

The three of us (me, sweetheart and DS) are extremely sensitive to other people's thoughts. Might be because we don't pollute our minds with TV.

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