February '09 Mamas ~ Childhood Chat :) - Page 13 - Mothering Forums
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#361 of 1166 Old 05-29-2012, 05:58 PM
 
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Starling: H sounds a lot like Greta. She really is a delightful baby too. She plays on her own for pretty long stretches. Owyn wasn't really a difficult baby by any means, but she didn't play on her own until she was much older. Maybe a second child thing. Greta would like to be on the move, but she just hasn't figured it out yet. She does roll pretty much anywhere she wants to go. Just this week, she mastered sitting up on her own, but is rarely still long enough to stay there for long. She is very vocal too and loud!! She says mama and dada and jabbers all the time. Tonight she signed "all done" for the first time! Owyn never picked up on the signing, but Greta tries to copy everything we do so she is really picking up on it! I need to introduce more signs. 


Mallory. Happily married to Joe since 6/25/05. Loving my adventure with my girls, Owyn Samantha, born 3/1/09. dust.gif and Greta June, born 11/2/11  babygirl.gif

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#362 of 1166 Old 05-29-2012, 10:25 PM
 
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Starling - Welcome back! Glad it went well. And great to end up with an easier second baby. My two were similar, I think.  And as she grows into a toddler, I think L is more difficult. The age is more difficult (I'll take 3 over 16 months any day), but also she has less natural caution and more natural deviousness, and is hell-bent to keep up with K.

 

Biking with kids:  I use a double trailer, a Burly.  Both kids squeeze in just fine, and even though they're close together, they don't seem to mind. Towing both of them up the hill several times a week got me in great shape, which I'm losing a bit now that preschool is out for the summer and I don't take them into town so often.

 

Swimming:  I could sign K up this year, and he'd have no problem leaving me, but I'm almost certain he'd refuse to participate, so I won't bother.  He's never been super into the water (which leads me to take him to the pool less often, which compounds it), and he's a very cautious soul who takes a long long time to warm up to participating in any game or activity with other kids and mostly just says no to them. Even after months of preschool, there were lots of activities there he only ever liked to watch. (oddly, he's not at all shy with kids or adults)

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#363 of 1166 Old 06-01-2012, 05:40 AM
 
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Lessons- June isn't doing any, although I am thinking of starting a co-op preschool thing with some of here friends since she won't be getting into school next year like her sisters did.

 

easier 2nd child- sweet, that's always nice. I think all of mine have been pretty easy (probably why I have 4). Jewel (9) is tougher now b/c she's really mean to her sisters and Josie(6) is sort of a pain because she doesn't solve problems she just cries. June is pretty bratty and says people are stupid when they don't do what she wants. We are trying to work on all of these things.

 

Starling- can't wait to hear about your trip.

 

biking- I used to have a 2 kid pull behind trailer, it was nice. Someone gave us a ride behind bike seat we will use for Coraline and it would be sort of cool to all go out bike riding but my bigger girls I think might give up, but it I thought they could decently do it I'd be tempted by the ride behind bike.


Courtney and Cree, baby made 3, added one more then there were 4, sakes alive, then we had 5, another in the mix now we have 6!

A Momma in love with her Little Women-Jewel Face, Jo Jo Bean, June Bug, and Sweet Coraline.

 

 

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#364 of 1166 Old 06-02-2012, 11:25 AM
 
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'urgh super annoyed with Hubs. We are leaving soon to go to a food fight birthday party and he is not going to make it. the party is for a 6 year old and 8 year old and now Junes is going to have to food fight alone because I can't be outside, I need to be inside with the baby. I know he's working but I think he should put the job off for a day so he can help her. I've been planning on him coming since we got invited, but his work always trumps any and all plans. It's not that I think he shouldn't work just that sometimes he needs to plan around events.


Courtney and Cree, baby made 3, added one more then there were 4, sakes alive, then we had 5, another in the mix now we have 6!

A Momma in love with her Little Women-Jewel Face, Jo Jo Bean, June Bug, and Sweet Coraline.

 

 

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#365 of 1166 Old 06-02-2012, 05:46 PM
 
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Sorry Courtney. I hope someone was able to help her. Can't even imagine a food fight birthday party!!


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#366 of 1166 Old 06-03-2012, 05:55 AM
 
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It was pretty awesome. My best friend ended up helping her and all of my kids had tons of fun, I'll show you pictures once I get them loaded.


Courtney and Cree, baby made 3, added one more then there were 4, sakes alive, then we had 5, another in the mix now we have 6!

A Momma in love with her Little Women-Jewel Face, Jo Jo Bean, June Bug, and Sweet Coraline.

 

 

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#367 of 1166 Old 06-04-2012, 09:03 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Courtney - the food fight party looks like it was so much fun!!  I would love to host something like that someday.  Maybe as an end of the school year party when R is a bit older.

 

It's funny, R is so good about leaving me and being independent if it involves playing with other kids.  But at home he can be so clingy and rarely plays alone.  He just needs to be with someone I guess, but it doesn't matter if it's me lol!  I'm going to get him into swimming this summer so that should be fun.  And he's still enjoying soccer too.  Not sure what we'll do in the fall but I'll have to find something.

 

I had my first shift on Saturday and I LOVED it.  It is such a great place to work.  The manager is very nice and very like-minded (we both had home births and bonded over that :P)  I'm mostly in the kitchen which is great.  I love preparing food and I love cleaning too so it's perfect.  I'm really going to enjoy it there.  I have 4 shifts a week, 6 hours each.  But the one shift is Saturdays and the day care isn't open so I need to find babysitters and my daycare subsidy will only cover the 3 week day shifts.  Kind of sucks.  But I'm glad to be working!


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#368 of 1166 Old 06-04-2012, 09:29 AM
 
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Everr: So glad you love your new job! It's probably fun to do something new - and especially to know that you get to leave after summer is over. :-)  M always leaves me alone more when she has others to play with. Playdates now def make things easier for me, whereas when they were younger, it was just me breaking up fights over sharing the entire time. 

 

Courtney: I'm glad your friend was able to help! Must have been a crazy mess! Fun idea though! RE: The breast milk. I do know that you can fedex milk. But I need to check prices. I saw one quick post about someone who spent $200 between the cooler, dry ice and shipping. If it's that much, then no way! But if it's only like $50, I'd totally pay!  :-) 

 

It's raining here! So random bc this weekend was gorgeous and warm. Spent a lot of time outside. We went on a nice urban hike yesterday. Our town has hundreds of tiny pathways that go between roads - often hidden and rustic and letting you peek into tons of backyards. Some are stairs, some are not. Tons of them seem to go up very steep hills! So our route took us pretty far up and stopped at 2 parks that we haven't been to since we used to go on these hikes when M was a tiny baby. We have a map of the paths and used to do this every weekend when M was a few months old. Can't remember the last time we went. I had to bribe M to stay in the hiking backpack the entire time w/a lollypop. LOL.   Anyway, it felt really good!


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#369 of 1166 Old 06-04-2012, 10:07 AM
 
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Everr: so glad your new job is fun and you like it! Woot Woot!

 

Cindy: Those hidden trails sound cool!

 

AFU: We have begun our solo gig. It's just the girls and me until June 28th. Wish me luck! My babysitter isn't going to work out after all. She is on vacation and then got accepted to this naval academy camp. Great for her and all that but I'm bummed not to have any kind of break for this whole month. So wish we had family near by. I have one friend who has offered to take F from time to time but honestly I don't really like how she parents so I'm not comfortable with that. Spanking, CIO, the whole works. She brought up spanking the other day actually so she may revoke her offer after she has heard what I had to say about it. It's not something I can smile and nod about. I told her that we don't spank at all and believe that it doesn't teach children to behave well it just makes them afraid. IMO, avoiding bad behavior out of fear of being hit (and I did use the word hit because that is what it is) is not the same thing as children learning to behave well out of their own will. I told her I don't want my children to grow up afraid of me. It's our job to guide them towards good behavior. Anyway- awkward conversation but it's not something I can let go if someone asks me about it. I admitted I lose my cool plenty but I have learned to walk away and start over. I hope it doesn't come to this but if the threat of spanking or god forbid the actual spanking happens in front of my kids we won't be hanging out anymore. Ugh!

 

On a much happier note... a local photography friend has asked me to be a part of a couple photo shoots she's been wanting to do- babywearing and breastfeeding. I'm so excited!


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#370 of 1166 Old 06-04-2012, 11:14 AM
 
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Ever ... Great that you're enjoying your job!

 

Courtney ... I'm glad that your girls had a good time at the food fight party.  What a cool idea!

 

Sue ... Frustrating about the babysitter.  And NO WAY, Jose about that other mom.  I read on another thread here at MDC, one where people are going on about what they'd get flamed for by the old MDC, and someone actually posted about how they're using spanking, and it's working because now their kid is trying really hard not to hit.  WTF? Teaching that it's not okay to hit ... by HITTING?  Sigh.  I actually miss the old MDC!
 


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#371 of 1166 Old 06-04-2012, 02:14 PM
 
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Everr - Awesome that you like the job. I think R is exactly K's opposite in terms of personality. K will happily play forever by himself, but only sometimes tolerates his sister joining in, and usually does his own thing even in groups of kids. I take him to see other kids sheerly out of a sense of parental responsibility (isn't it supposed to be good for them?) and so I can hang with their parents.

 

Courtney - Food fight party sounds fun. Might be an idea for when mine are older.

 

Sue - that sucks about the babysitter, and your friend. June 28 is a long time, isn't there any sort of drop in activity or another friend you could swap kids with for a bit? You need some kind of break.I forget how lucky I am sometimes! My husband's away for a few days, but I am blessed with a local grandma here, and all of my friends would be fine to watch K. And there's quite a bit of informal kid-swaps that happen, especially in the summer.

 

Cindy - I used to love those little trails in Seattle (also often had stairs and were steep).

 

Bad mom strategy of the week: Kids are sick, husband's gone, and when they decide to have a screaming meltdown at eachother at 7AM when I'm trying to make breakfast and coffee?  Chocolate. Giving each kid (and me) a small square of dark chocolate solves absolutely everything. I don't even feel very guilty about it.

 

AFM:  Thinking about what I was doing last summer, I'm suddenly overwhelmed by how BIG my kids have gotten. Lituya was barely sitting up, and now she's running everywhere, climbing rocks, and speaking in sentences. And when she takes off for the bottom of our driveway at breakneck speed yelling "Run on the Road!!!" I do wonder where my baby went so soon.  And when I stop paying attention to Katmai for a minute, I find that he's let himself outside, gotten the pruning shears, and wandered off to the top of a little hill on our property to snip down the elderberry for me, before getting involved in some imaginary game. Or he's reading words and talking about phonics rules, or balancing on logs, or explaining in detail how plants grow... 

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#372 of 1166 Old 06-04-2012, 02:35 PM
 
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never feel guilty about chocolate!


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#373 of 1166 Old 06-05-2012, 11:31 AM
 
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I realize our kiddos aren't really "toddlers" anymore but I read this today and found it a great reminder.

 

http://theparentingpassageway.com/2011/06/28/guest-post-meaningful-work-for-toddlers/

 

I have to say that age 3 is so hard for us. I miss the twos! But as the article talks about- engaging her in real meaningful work in the house really does help a lot.

 

What are you guys up to these days? Here are some of the things that have helped us...

 

-using a dropper to drip colored vinegar into a tray of baking soda

-washing windows with a spray bottle

-cooking

-planting in the garden

-digging for worms for the compost bin

-polishing the wooden toys

-washing playsilks in a warm of warm soapy water

-washing dishes in the sink

-laying out ingredients and letting her make concoctions

 

I need to do it more...


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#374 of 1166 Old 06-05-2012, 09:55 PM
 
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Oh I love parenting passageway! Although sometimes I feel guilty reading her words about all the things I should be doing with my kids and how I should slow down but can't because I'm just so busy. But it's a good reminder. I did the 21 days of being a more mindful parent. It was good reflective work.

I have found that giving her a cloth and a spray bottle is a fabulous distraction. Also the folding of laundry she likes that. Plant watering, helping with cooking: she loves to crack eggs and pour stuff. 

I have been reading and following along but no time to post. Thanks all for reminding me to say no less. I find I say no a lot if I am busy because it does take longer to let the kids do it. I need to let it go a little and slow down but choose when to so I'm not stressed about it. 

 

AFM: I went to a gender communication workshop today that was pretty awesome. We all know that men and women are different but she really had a wonderful way of highlighting the differences and putting some humour into it. I definitely took a lot home I could use with my son and my husband. The big one was eye contact. Just because a man isn't looking at me doesn't me he's not listening. Men often have to look away to focus and concentrate. I will never again tell my son to look at me when I am talking to him. I need to read some stuff on why gender matters I think. For parenting and for entering an IT workforce which is primarily male. 


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#375 of 1166 Old 06-05-2012, 09:58 PM
 
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That's a great list Sue! I'll have to do the dropper one. I even bought droppers a while back but forgot about them. And I've been meaning to do the concoction mixing idea - what things do you put out for her to mix up? M always helps in the kitchen. She likes to "wash dishes". She helped me dust yesterday and keeps admiring the spot on the side of the buffet that she polished. She also has her own watering can and loves to water the potted plants - and she often trims leaves off our bushes with DH. She always asks to trim the bushes. My dad just ordered a big vertical planter for strawberries that is for her. My dad's wife is all excited for her to be involved in gardening - but she doesn't realize that she already helps with all our gardening (but we don't have all that much growing). I think I'll let her spray and clean some things. She loved washing the glass off after painting it at a children's museum. They had squirt bottles and squigees out for the kids.

 

What else? She picked out a broom and dust pan in her size when my mom was here and wanted to buy her a toy. So now she helps sweep up her crumbs. And she insisted we buy a piggy bank from the $1 bin at target yesterday. She kept asking for money so I finally told her she should earn some by doing chores. I haven't decided yet what that should be though. Maybe collecting eggs or feeding the cats? DH is a bit torn though on whether or not we should teach her that she should do chores bc she gets allowance for them or if she should do them bc she is part of the family and everyone does them. I didn't intend on a $$ lesson when I agreed to the piggy bank, but now I'm glad it was brought up.

 

Everr: Is that bus guy in the flying pics on facebook??? :-) You look awesome up there!!

 

Cindy


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#376 of 1166 Old 06-05-2012, 11:52 PM
 
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Sigh...  I look at your list Sue, and it all looks pretty wonderful, but it all looks like something that will be quickly rendered a disaster by a 17 month old! My two kids are pretty close in age, but I still find the difference challenging. What "meaningful work" can be done by both at the same time? K loves cooking with me, loves to help in the garden, etc...  L wants to do everything he does, but if I get both of them involved together she snatches the mixing spoon out of his hand, flings flour across the floor, starts ripping leaves off the cabbage plants instead of thinning the radishes (K is a little overzealous with the radishes himself - he loves them too much to let them get big), etc...

Not to complain too much. Spending all day playing on the beach and playing outside in warm sun is great for all ages, and we had a really good day.

 

Cindy - I'm not even sure K understands what money is! He goes to the grocery store and post office with me sometimes, but I always pay in plastic, so I don't think he has much sense of the concept.

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#377 of 1166 Old 06-06-2012, 08:03 AM
 
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Everr ... I will not make a comment about the Mile High Club.  I will not.  Not happening.  Nope.  winky.gif

 

Sue ... Great list!  We do a lot on it already, but not the dropper one.  Cool idea ... now to find some droppers.

 

Nilla ... Are you moving towards IT?  Did I miss that somewhere along the line?  Gendered stuff is tricky at our house, being that DP is so butch that she gets read as a boy most often, and has so many masculine tendencies.  I find a lot of the male-ish generalizations apply to her too.  Interesting!

 

Helping:  E loooooooves to help and can and will whenever possible.  We don't usually have a firm time issue, so she can go at it whenever, so long as I leave enough time beforehand if I want to end up doing or going somewhere else.  She loves to help by cooking, and can pretty much put a meal together on her own, with direction and supervision.  She has mastered the sharp paring knife when it comes to thinks like bananas and melon and other softer things, which pleases her to no end. 

 

She often puts H's meals together.  This morning it was cutting blueberries and banana and toast strips, and mixing brown rice and squash together.   We've got a tiny garden area that is all hers, much to my control-freak-martha-stewart consternation.  A learning curve for me for sure!  I don't get her to help much with the vaccuming and cleaning, although she'd love to.  My control-freak-martha-stewart tendencies haven't relaxed enough just yet.  I do let her have her own rag and such and she follows along, which counts.  She loves to wash just about anything, from her toys to DP's motorcycle. 

 

She loves 'going by herself' right now, which means I send her on an errand to the neighbours (within our co-op complex) to drop off or pick something up or check the mail.  She'd love to do more of than, but not okay just yet.  She also loves to go to storytime at the library "by herself," which means that I have to stay in the main area while she runs down the hall and into the separate room and enjoys storytime by herself.  This also include running ahead and into whatever store/house/even that we're going to.  She always waits once she gets in, which is great, but this one gets my heart racing a bit.

 

Money:  E loves money!  We do everything with cash, so she is often the one to pay.  We'll give her the paper money and she'll give it to the clerk and get the change and receipt.  She often shops "by herself" (see above).  I help her find what we need and she does the rest.

She has a piggy bank and we give her whatever money she wants for it.  She understands when we don't have any more, and never complains.  We don't buy her things that she asks for, so she doesn't know that that's a reality for some kids.  She likes to buy her dog a treat now and then, but even with that, I sometimes say no if I don't have the 50 cents for it.  She'll ask for things sometimes, and when we say no, she'll ask why not.  We tell her that we don't have the money for it, but if she wants to ask for it for Christmas or her birthday, she can.  She can also save up any money she gets that is her own. 

The piggy bank money is for play, not considered hers.  We can use it, replace it, switch it out.  Her money is what people give her specifically, which is very rare.  There is a little old man up the block that gives her a dollar when he sees her, and she has sold a few of her things, but she always spends the money on hot chocolate or rides on the automated cow or donkey nearby.  She understands that if she wants a bigger ticket item, she'll need to put the money away and not spend it.

 

DP and I haven't talked about allowance formally, but I don't think we'll connect chores to money.  Interesting topic!
 


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#378 of 1166 Old 06-06-2012, 08:55 AM
 
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Oh, the helping. Owyn loves to help, but she can get a little over-zealous with it at times. She has a little spray bottle and free access to wash rags, so she loves to wipe surfaces. She can reach the sink in the bathroom by herself, so I often find her rinsing her dishes off in the bathroom. Not so fun when there was food on her plate, though! She is into a big ice water thing right now. She has access to her cups, so I often find her getting ice out of the freezer and filling her cup in the bathroom. She also loves to help with Greta. She helps me change her diapers and helps pick up toys after her. She loves when I ask her to "watch" Greta for any length of time. Like when I go to the bathroom I'll ask her to watch her sister and make her smile if she cries. She takes this role very seriously. She also has a little broom and dustpan, so she likes to help sweep the floors too. With cooking, she loves to stir and pour things. She has attempted cracking eggs, but still needs help with that one. 

 

She is also able to do a lot for herself now. She gets herself dressed. She is also very stylish so she doesn't usually pick out anything too out there to wear! She likes her clothes to match, also her shoes! She brushes her hair in the mornings. She can put her shoes on most of the time. She has the bathroom procedure down-- can go, wipe, flush and wash her hands totally on her own. She can pick up after herself. Her imagination is really running wild right now too, so that keeps her pretty entertained most of the day. It's really entertaining to listen to her when she's pretend playing with her dolls, so funny to hear her play out real life events in her pretend play!

 

Anyone have trouble with public bathrooms? Most public bathrooms anymore have automatic flushers and they terrify Owyn. I used to be able to just cover it with my hand and she'd be fine, but lately she refuses to use them. When we're out, she just starts asking to go home if she needs to use the bathrooms. A lot of times home is an hour away when this comes up. Not sure how to remedy this. I'm afraid she's just not going to tell me she needs to go in order to avoid the scary toilets and we'll end up with accidents when we're out...


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#379 of 1166 Old 06-06-2012, 11:13 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Vegan Princess View Post

Everr: Is that bus guy in the flying pics on facebook??? :-) You look awesome up there!!

 

 

Yep :)

 

Starling - lol!  And I won't respond to any mile high club comments.. We were only 3500 feet :P

 

Re Helping - R *loves* to help!  I try and let him as much as possible but sometimes I'm in a hurry and I just want it done.  Your list is great Sue!  I may have to keep some of those in mind for a rainy day :)  I find we are so busy now that we don't have a lot of down time..  R is in daycare full time, I'm now going to be working Saturdays, that just leaves Sundays and it's pretty easy to make plans and have stuff to do.  Last week I kept him home from daycare one day for a zoo day with mommy.  I'll probably do that often because otherwise I only will have 1 day a week with him.  (although I'll admit that sometimes that's enough..)

 

Re Money - R doesn't really have a concept of money.  He does, however, love to get a spare card for me and pretend to buy stuff with it lol!  I think it's a good idea to start introducing it and I might do that, get him to pay for little things with cash.  I did this at the zoo last week to get him to pay for our train ride, but he really wasn't into it and didn't seem to care.

 

Re Public Toilets - No problems here.  R actually went by himself last week!  We were in a safe public restroom so I went into the stall by myself.  He went into the one next to me and did everything he needed to on his own.  And then crawled out the bottom leaving the door locked :/  I had to get him to crawl back under to unlock the door.  

 

Erin - Your life is so busy right now!!  Just think though, both of them will soon be out of this toddler phase and will be awesome playmates.  My brother and I are only a year apart and we always played together growing up :)

 

Sue - Good luck with the solo parenting!!  I'm sure you'll do fine :)  And I totally agree with you about the spanking lady.  I will (shamefully) admit that I have spanked R.  I didn't do it because I thought it would be a good idea and a good discipline tool.  I did it because I was frustrated and felt out of options and just going through difficult stuff.  But, I haven't spanked him in a long while and I'm doing a lot better at controlling my emotions.  I think mostly it's because I am doing better emotionally so I don't have all that underlying stress with me all the time.

 

Nilla - Sounds like an interesting workshop.  I've been thinking about this because bus guy isn't too open about how he feels (which is common for guys I think..)  The last guy I dated was SO ridiculously open that it seems like such a huge difference.  But the last guy also ended up being kind of an ass and so far my new guy is awesome and I think his actions speak more about how he feels, so I'm ok with that :)

 

And, I had my second shift today, still going great!  She said there should definitely be extra shifts available for me especially in July and August so it's going to work out well :)


Mama to my charming little boy, born at home January '09
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#380 of 1166 Old 06-06-2012, 07:25 PM
 
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Mal ... E is terrified of automatic flush toilets!  I drape a coat over it and then let her leave the stall before i let it flush.  Maybe she'd go if you draped something more substantial over it?  A special Flushproof Recieving Blanket perhaps?


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#381 of 1166 Old 06-06-2012, 08:52 PM
 
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My friend told me to call them magic flush toilets bc they magically flush on their own - and play up that aspect. M has never loved them but since I always called them that, she seems to be ok with them. She never likes flushing noises at public restrooms though.

 

Starling: I am always so impressed by what E does and what you guys allow her to do. Things that don't even occur to me yet. :-) You're always my inspiration!

 

Makenna fell asleep at 5:45 tonight! She was on the couch watching a video while I worked on dinner. I realized it had been quiet for a while and went to check and she was out. I'm so afraid she's going to wake up at 2am and be up for the day! She had a very busy day playing though. She spent 2.5 hours at a friend's house then they came here and played for 2 more hours. Had a rest then went to a park for a while. We went to the grocery store after the park and she was melting down by the time we got in the car. 

 

Cindy


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#382 of 1166 Old 06-06-2012, 08:53 PM
 
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BTW I'm not getting my email notifications from here anymore. Anyone know how to fix it? Everr, I think you told me what to do last time and it worked - but I forgot what you told me! Something I had to do to my computer.


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#383 of 1166 Old 06-06-2012, 09:38 PM
 
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Nilla ... Are you moving towards IT?  Did I miss that somewhere along the line?  Gendered stuff is tricky at our house, being that DP is so butch that she gets read as a boy most often, and has so many masculine tendencies.  I find a lot of the male-ish generalizations apply to her too.  Interesting!

 

Yep the second master's degree in my double degree is health information science which is basically health information technology and clinical information systems. The workshop was fabulous. She also did the introvert vs. extrovert and got us to write out how the other perceives us and might find difficult communicating with us. Helped me to understand why I have issues with extroverts and what they find difficult about communicating with me. The brain differences in men and women were the most intriguing I think. They described men as having boxes to be able to jump in and out of and that there is a 5-6 sec delay before they get 'into' the appropriate box and can respond. They also have an empty box and can truly think of nothing while women have a map in the mind and it's always there and no empty place. Most men respond with the conclusion first, women conclusion last. Oh so much interesting stuff. 

 

Money we don't tie allowance to chores. We have chores because you live here and are part of this family. We give money for learning to manage money. It's a weekly allowance but it only started when ds was 5. 


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#384 of 1166 Old 06-07-2012, 05:17 AM
 
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Mal ... E is terrified of automatic flush toilets!  I drape a coat over it and then let her leave the stall before i let it flush.  Maybe she'd go if you draped something more substantial over it?  A special Flushproof Recieving Blanket perhaps?

Oh, a blanket or something is a great idea. That might work and we usually have one if Greta is with us. I'd have to do it before she even sees the toilet though. She recognizes them by sight and won't go near it if she sees it's an automatic. We were shopping last weekend and she had a full on meltdown when it was time to potty and we couldn't find a non-automatic toilet anywhere. I finally had to bribe her and even then she cried the whole time she was pottying. Poor girl.


Mallory. Happily married to Joe since 6/25/05. Loving my adventure with my girls, Owyn Samantha, born 3/1/09. dust.gif and Greta June, born 11/2/11  babygirl.gif

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#385 of 1166 Old 06-07-2012, 10:24 AM
 
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Starling - I'm so impressed by all that E does.  A lot of stuff I wouldn't have thought to try.

 

Nilla - The workshop sounds fascinating.  For chores, what age do you have formal "chores" for the kids?

 

Everr - Glad your job is going well and you're enjoying the flying. I've seen some pretty neat stuff from small planes, but I've never quite been comfortable in them, and often see them as more of a necessary hazard of life here.

 

Mal  - Only one autoflush in town (in the school), and K doesn't seem to mind it.

 

Helping - In general, I feel a bit guilty that I've backed off of encouraging K to "help". I let him when he asks or seems interested, but if the kids are ever entertaining themselves/eachother so that I can get something done quickly and without interference, I leap on the opportunity! I worry I'll have battles later over toy pickup, etc.. if I don't try harder now, though.

 

Independence - I do love the independence they can have at this age. I can send K on an errand to grandma's (same property, different house), and he can now play outside by himself! The other day he went out and played for probably 20 minutes while I was putting L to sleep, then let himself back in. In some ways he seems so young for it, but there really isn't much trouble he could get into and he stays well in bounds.

 

Money - How terrible is it that I want to keep K naive as long as possible? Since the only things he ever sees purchased are fruits and veggies, he never asks me to buy anything other than an orange or some cherry tomatoes. No toys, no candy, no begging for stuff of any kind.  I want to keep it that way! He is fascinated by numbers and receipts though, and the postmistress lets him push in the numbers and make the receipt every time we mail something.

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#386 of 1166 Old 06-07-2012, 02:10 PM
 
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Making meals! You can tell that E is a daughter of a chef!

 

My mom sends F cards sometimes with $1. She thinks its pretty cool and likes to use it to pay for our groceries or for a movie at blockbuster. I don't think we will do an allowance- I never had one. If I needed $ for something I just asked for it. I may or may not have had to do something extra around the house to earn it- sort of depended. And I didn't always get it when I asked either.

 

Fiona plays outside alone quite a bit. Our yard is fenced though. When she is out front without the fence she knows her boundaries and I make sure the dogs are out with her to bark if anyone comes by. I only let her in the front alone when I'm able to keep popping out to check on her. No opportunity for solo errands here.

 

toilets- I've heard of people using post it notes to cover the sensor.

 

Yesterday my heart dropped when Fiona was mad I told her to wait on the sidewalk so I could help hr get in the car. She ran away from me right into the road. It was awful and I yelled so much and shoved her into the car. She sobbed the whole way home. I was still so shaken by it that I had a hard time sleeping last night. We have talked about it a lot but it was the worst feeling ever to see your child do that.


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#387 of 1166 Old 06-07-2012, 09:21 PM
 
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Oh sue... Owyn did that to me in a parking lot one time and it scared the hell out of me. I really was to blame. I often open her door and just ask her to climb into her seat while I put Greta in her seat on the other side. That time I walked away before she was all the way in and she came running after me and darted into the middle of the parking lot. My reaction scared her enough that she likely won't do it again but I really should have kept my emotions in check. As a kid I had a friend that was killed by getting hit by a car. A few years ago my SIL was also hit by a car, badly injured and lost a pregnancy from it. So my fear of that is really heightened.

Mallory. Happily married to Joe since 6/25/05. Loving my adventure with my girls, Owyn Samantha, born 3/1/09. dust.gif and Greta June, born 11/2/11  babygirl.gif

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#388 of 1166 Old 06-07-2012, 10:10 PM
 
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Hugs Sue! That is so scary! I'm glad everyone is fine! We talk a lot about not going in the street bc we live on a busy corner at a 4 way stop. We dont have a drive way and have to walk up the side walk a bit to get in our front gate. But as much as your child knows, you just never know if they are going to be a 3 yr old and do something impulsive!

 

Sue - what do you use for making concoctions? I set some stuff up in the backyard today. It was a lot of fun. Wasn't sure what to use so I put out: flour, corn starch, sugar, salt, water, vinegar, baking soda and food color with a bunch of different measuring cups and spoons, a wooden spoon and a whisk. I also dug out the droppers and she did the baking soda and vinegar. Also a hit. I had bought the droppers a while ago bc I kept meaning to order liquid watercolors and do a painting project with the droppers. She really wants to do that now that I've shown her the droppers - but I still haven't ordered the paint. Oops.

 

Erin: That is pretty cool that K has only ever seen you buy fruit and veggies! We don't often buy toys and so Makenna never asks. It is very rare that she finds anything she says that she really wants. Her american girl doll was really the only thing I can think of like that. Her best friend is so spoiled. I really like her mom and we agree on a lot of parenting issues, but she just buys way too much for her kids! It's a problem if you ask me. So we go over and the little girl is always whining bc she doesn't have a certain Thomas train - when she already has 50 other ones. But no, she needs that one. It's just not something M does - and actually, after that incident, Makenna kept asking me why her friend kept whining about the train. She used those words - on her own. She never heard me say the little girl had been whining. So it obviously bothered her too. M does understand paying and money. She always takes my old credit cards or auto club cards I give her and says she wants to pay for dinner or she often wants to save money to pay the parking meter (ha -can you tell I live in a more urban area than you guys?). She also likes to sign the copy of credit card receipts that you get to keep for yourself.

 

Playing outside alone - our yard is fenced. But I never leave her out there alone for more time than it takes to run in and grab something. She wouldn't be happy and I'm not comfortable. Like I said, we live on a busy corner. The subway station is 2 blocks away and we get lots of foot traffic past our house. Not that any of the people going by are out to cause trouble. I'm sure she truly is safe in our yard - I'm just over protective. Like I said, we do live in suburbs, but for being suburbs, it's still fairly urban here. I wish I could jsut let her go outside and roam! My husband grew up on a 40 acre farm and his mom just set the 3 boys loose. He ended up walking a mile or 2 down a country road to the neighbor's house when he was 3! The nieghbors had to call his mom - I guess she didn't even realize he was gone yet!! 

 

Cindy


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#389 of 1166 Old 06-08-2012, 10:34 AM
 
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Funny the different things we worry about in different places.  Any people that come by our place are likely to be friends of ours. My main misgiving about leaving K out playing by himself is bears and wandering dogs! I'm relying on my own dog's barking warning there, and the fact that the bears are extremely unlikely to present any problem.

 

Our property is 3 acres, and not fenced at all. But the thick brush provides a natural barrier in most directions. Following open paths/roads, he could climb the steep trail up the mountain (unlikely), or head down to the road. He knows he's not allowed to go past the base of the driveway, and even past that it's a very quiet road for another 1/4 mile or so until he gets to the main road into town. He does know to stay on the side of the road and watch for cars. I don't think he's the type to decide to go to town by himself though, or I wouldn't let him play alone.

 

As for only buying fruits and veggies, I think the lack of shopping is actually a perverse benefit of living in a really small town. No shopping temptations of any sort. We stock up on staples over the internet or every few months on a trip out (which K isn't always there for), then just buy organic produce in the little natural food store in town (less now that the garden is really getting going). Everything else comes over the internet.

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#390 of 1166 Old 06-08-2012, 04:20 PM
 
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I have started letting Owyn go outside to play on her own for a bit. She knows to stay in the yard. The farthest she wanders is around to our front porch or into the alley behind our house. I don't worry too much about the alley because it's only used by the 4 houses on our block and we are right in the middle. So, our neighbors pull into their drives before getting to our portion of the alley. She likes to play in the gravel and dirt out there.

 

She gets bored pretty quickly though. Poor girl is so used to having other kids around her age. She always did when I did daycare and always has at my sister's house while I'm working. She really doesn't know what to do with herself right now with just Greta and me. I think that's why she's been so annoying with her sister. She really wishes she could play more with her. Greta is interacting with her a lot now and loves when Owyn gives her attention, but sometimes Owyn gets a little excited about it, in her face too much. Greta definitely speaks up for herself though. She will push Owyn away and yell at her if she doesn't like what she's doing.

 

Tomorrow I am taking the day off! I'm doing a garage sale at my sister's, so the girls will be with DH during that. Then, I'm going out to eat for my cousin's birthday-- ladies only! 


Mallory. Happily married to Joe since 6/25/05. Loving my adventure with my girls, Owyn Samantha, born 3/1/09. dust.gif and Greta June, born 11/2/11  babygirl.gif

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