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-   -   can three year olds really wipe their own bottoms??? (http://www.mothering.com/forum/65-childhood-years/1362588-can-three-year-olds-really-wipe-their-own-bottoms.html)

rubidoux 09-06-2012 10:16 AM

Gah!  Today was my boy's first day of preschool, which is unbearably cute, except that I am living in fear of him having to poop.  Sheepish.gif  He just got in off the wait list a couple of days ago, and ever since we found out, my older ds has been telling me that I have to teach him to wipe.  I think my older was scarred by his lack of wiping ability and he tells me that he had to hold it till he got home because he was scared of wiping or not wiping well enough.  So yesterday, after my little one pooped I handed him some TP and omg.  What a freaking mess!  Horrible!  All over his hands and basically just spread it around on his butt.  Crap!  And the truth of the matter is that I cannot even see him getting better at this with practice.  I think he really just needs a bit more age, yk?  The school has a no-wipe policy.  What is it they think is going to happen?  Do the other kids really wipe reasonably well?  I'm happy he is, at least, a good hand-washer.  And I do think he naturally tends to go later in the day, so hopefully it just won't be an issue.


Bokonon 09-06-2012 10:35 AM

I totally understand!  I don't let DD wipe her own bottom for the same reason.  I just tell her that she can't poop at school, LOL, and so far she's even been holding her pee while at preschool, even though she's peed there before (on the first day, when I showed her where to go).  She's an afternoon/evening pooper anyway, so I'm pretty comfortable with her not having to go during school, but I know I was wiping my son's bottom until he was almost 6!


rubidoux 09-06-2012 11:01 AM

Oh good, phew!  And maybe they're in the same class!  He's at the montessori school of san diego.  (think i'll come back to edit that out later!)  

 

It is crazy, though, right?  I mean, to expect this of them.  Ewwww!


meemee 09-06-2012 11:12 AM

if your son is willing and when you think he is ready TEACH him how to wipe. have wipes ready for him.

 

in the meantime let him do his best (the teachers do stand and keep an eye usually for this very reason - at least they did in dd's ps/dc) in school and you deal with the streak marks.

 

dd i discovered had no idea how to wipe. eyesroll.gif in her 'save the environment' gusto, she was using too few TP sheets. plus she is a perfectionist and a ewww person. wiping bottoms was a nightmare and she didnt really do it on her own till she was 9 (problem is she uses a bidet at her dads and TP and wipes at ours. 9 was when i discovered how she was wiping and thus making a mess and so i had to help her out. then she did it on her own. personally i am saving up for a personal bidet that fits in your toilet bowl, because imho it is the best). in fact once in a blue moon i still wipe. esp. when its a messy one. she cant stand eww on her fingers - of any kind. 

 

it is so big for her that she does not poo anywhere but at home. she will hold it outside. because of her high eww factor she rarely uses public bathrooms. even at school. 

 

but she doesnt hold it if she has to go (the news of a lady drinking a tonne of water and not going to the bathroom killing her has made dd aware of the dangers of holding).


Chloe'sMama 09-06-2012 11:25 AM

DD is almost 4.5 and doesn't try or know how to wipe.  my niece just started wiping and she is 5.25 years old.  3 seems so little.


mumkimum 09-06-2012 11:29 AM

I remember when my dd1 started preschool I got a few boxes of the kid's moist wipes for practicing at home (so she'd be able to do a better job wiping by herself) and I think I even sent a small pack of them with school stuff for her to have there, just in case she ever needed more help wiping (I don't think she ever even used them though).  

 

It did end up helping - I'd have her use one moist wipe (or regular TP) then sorta check and help her finish getting cleaned up if she needed.  Sometimes I'd run the sink water, dab some of the TP in the wet sink, and have her use the damp TP and that worked just as well if you'd rather not get special wipes (for us, just knowing we had *special wipes* was a help in making bathroom stuff more appealing).  


Bokonon 09-06-2012 11:46 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by rubidoux View Post

Oh good, phew!  And maybe they're in the same class!  He's at the montessori school of san diego.  (think i'll come back to edit that out later!)  

 

It is crazy, though, right?  I mean, to expect this of them.  Ewwww!

 

Haha!  No, DD is not at that school, LOL.


JudiAU 09-06-2012 02:01 PM

The potty training/ no wip thing usually depends on how they are licensed. Many preschools are licensed as child care centers and thus can help with bodily functions. Others aren't.

 

I'd actually start teaching them to wipe with a regular wipe or flushable wipe. It is much easier to get poop off that way and will give them some confidence. My three year old can easily wipe her bottom and my five year old struggles.


APToddlerMama 09-06-2012 02:06 PM

My 4.5 year old is a horrible wiper. Luckily he never has an urge to poop in public unless we are out of town so school isn't an issue.

ellairiesmom 09-06-2012 02:36 PM

DD1 is almost 5 & can't wipe after pooping herself.  We put wipes in her backpack in case she has to go at school so she can at least make an attempt, but my 6 year old niece can't even wipe after pooping with TP.  She still asks my sil for help & if she is by herself, uses a wipe if available & STILL doesn't do a perfect job.  

 

TP and poop is just way too tough for those short little arms & coordination levels.  Some sort of wipe gives them more of a chance of getting something cleaned up...


One_Girl 09-06-2012 03:40 PM

My dd was completely self sufficient in this area at three and we have two year old children in my preschool class who also are able to do this independently. I didn't teach my dd though, her wonderful preschool teacher taught her by imitating some of the actions they need to do when they wipe (she was fully clothed of course) . I am finding that how you hand the paper to them can make a huge difference when they are first learning also. Wads are bad big squares are good. Once they have the hang if it it no longer matters and they can be completely self sufficient.

I have to.guess that this is a skill most kids this age are able to conquer or it wouldn't be a requirement. There is no difference in licensing for preschool and daycare where I live and this is still a common requirement. Just because many can doesn't mean all can of course. Maybe the teacher can give you some pointers.

chel 09-06-2012 03:57 PM

My dd is almost 3, been pt for 5m and no where close to wiping without making a huge mess. If it w up to her she wouldnt wipe after peeing.
She just started mdo program, but they dont have to be pt at all, so no fear of the lack of help. Sadly, Im thinking the staff finds it easier to deal with kids in diapers than a class full of varying stages of pt kids

rubidoux 09-06-2012 04:22 PM

Well, I'm happy he's not the only one!  I will get some wipes for at home practice.  We use cloth, but I think they are too big and floppy and heavy for him to handle when wet.

Quote:
Originally Posted by One_Girl View Post

My dd was completely self sufficient in this area at three and we have two year old children in my preschool class who also are able to do this independently. I didn't teach my dd though, her wonderful preschool teacher taught her by imitating some of the actions they need to do when they wipe (she was fully clothed of course) . I am finding that how you hand the paper to them can make a huge difference when they are first learning also. Wads are bad big squares are good. Once they have the hang if it it no longer matters and they can be completely self sufficient.
I have to.guess that this is a skill most kids this age are able to conquer or it wouldn't be a requirement. There is no difference in licensing for preschool and daycare where I live and this is still a common requirement. Just because many can doesn't mean all can of course. Maybe the teacher can give you some pointers.

 

I wonder how much of a difference the actual poop makes.  lol  I think he may have the worst kind.  Something like peanut butter.  redface.gif  I would be seriously impressed to see a two year old handle this poop, though I'm sure there are some who can.  



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