what time does your 4 year old go to bed?mes - Mothering Forums

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Old 10-09-2012, 04:48 PM - Thread Starter
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Just curious. I don't have an issue with when he goes to bed..I'd like him to go to bed by 9, but that doesn't happen that often. And DH gets up early..like 6..but the kids and I don't wake until 7:30 or 8..sometimes 8:30. This puts everything later! And DH is really helpful at bedtime, he gives them baths while I'm doing the dishes and gets their jammies on and brushed their teeth, and then when they are ready for bed, I put DD to bed and he puts our almost 4 year old DS to bed. Most kids if they stay up late, they will still get up early..not my son. he goes to bed late, he sleeps in! I don't mind this normally, but DH really wants an hour or so of kid free time before we go to bed at night. DH is in bed by 10 or 10:30(depending on if we DTD). I'm okay with this but that means we'll be pushing the whole day routine earlier..and I'll be waking up earlier. I have always liked the idea of of waking up early in the morning but I'm not exactly a morning person. Just wondering if pushing his bedtime back is do-able or not? What do you all think? when do your kids go to bed? I'm planning on homeschooling, so I'm not really going to have to make him get used to getting up early because of that.

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Old 10-09-2012, 06:43 PM
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930 on most nights, but 830 when she has to get up for preschool. That is only 2x a week though. 

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Old 10-11-2012, 02:01 PM
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My daughter turned 5 in September.  For both her and her 8 year old sister, they need about 11 hours of sleep.  So an 8 AM wake up time would mean in bed lights out done with books, etc.  by 9PM.

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Old 10-11-2012, 02:14 PM
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My DD just turned 4 and her bedtime varies depending on whether or not she naps. She's in pre-school full-time, and she naps there sometimes. On those days, it is difficult to get her to sleep before 9:00 pm, usually she's asleep by 9:30.


She doesn't nap on weekends, and she's starting to drop the nap at school as well. On no-nap days, we can usually get her to sleep by 8:30 pm, sometimes earlier.


On weekdays, we have to wake her up by 7:00 am in order to get to school on time. That is a struggle. On weekends, she typically sleeps in until 8:00 am.

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Old 10-11-2012, 06:34 PM
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My son is 5 but his bedtime at 4 and now are basically the same. Anywhere between 8-9pm. Though lately it's been closer to 8.

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Old 10-11-2012, 09:40 PM
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Usually 9 or 9:30.

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Old 10-15-2012, 12:03 PM
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8-8:30 with no nap; closer to 9-9:30 without one.

If the people let government decide what foods they eat and what medicines they take, their bodies will soon be in as sorry a state as are the souls of those who live under tyranny." Thomas Jefferson.

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Old 10-15-2012, 03:34 PM
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My 5 year old and 2 year old go to bed at 6.30. The 2 year old falls asleep straight away and I wake her up at 7.15. The 5 year old is asleep between 7.00 and 7.30 and wakes up at 6.30am. When we didn't need to get up for school bed time was a bit later and they still got up quite early. Later bed time means less overall sleep. Personally I really need kid free time in the evening and I'd rather get up early than sacrifice that. 

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Old 10-15-2012, 05:28 PM
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My boys (now 5.5 & 3) have been going to bed ~8 for the last 3.5-4 yrs - basicly since DS1 got moved into his room (which they now share). Generally we brush teeth & go potty one last time ~8pm and go upstairs to read stories - sometimes this is a bit earlier (apparently they both just decided its time for bed now at 7:30...), more often a bit later (ie ~8:30). But they are almost always in bed by 9pm one way or another. 

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Old 10-15-2012, 09:47 PM
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all kids ages 8 5 n 3.5 yrs go to bed at 7

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Old 10-18-2012, 08:42 AM
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The whole family retires at 8h30, including my 4yo. We get up between 6h45-7h15

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Old 10-18-2012, 09:32 PM
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Betime for 4yo DS is 8pm. He's always up by 7am at the latest, regardless of when he goes to bed, and hasn't napped since he turned 3.

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Old 10-18-2012, 10:07 PM
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My 4 year ols ds starts his bedtime routine between 8 and 8:30. He's normally tucked into bed by 9 and asleep by 9:30.

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Old 10-19-2012, 12:50 PM
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I have a 5yo, a 3 (almost 4) yo and a 20mo.. They all start their bedtime routine around 630 and are in bed by 730. A lot of the time my oldest will look at books until around 8. My oldest gets up between 430 and 5, my 3yo around 5-530 and the 20mo around 530-6. The two oldest don't take naps any longer, the 20 mo takes an hour nap around noon.

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Old 10-19-2012, 06:17 PM
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We're homeschooling too, and I've never really worried about what time the kids get to bed.  Ds1 and I are definitely night owls, and although dh complains about it, he stays up later than me often if he's doing something on his laptop. 

This summer we had early swimming lessons, and the kids went to bed at 9pm, so they could be up at 8am.  We've slipped though since we've moved into a new house, and we all stayed up many nights unpacking and just enjoying the house...so now the kids have been going to bed closer to 10 or 11.  I do wish we could be more consistent, so we'd get adult time in the evening, but sometimes the kids really are not sleepy yet, or ds2 had a late nap (he's in between dropping naps and sometimes doesn't nap or all of a sudden falls asleep at 5 and wakes up at 7, and there's no early bedtime then, LOL).   I think when we need to get up early, we do...but the kids are perfectly fine staying up if we're somewhere or if we have company over, so I'm glad to have the flexibility for their bedtime.  

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Old 10-19-2012, 08:22 PM
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On school nights, 7:30-8 is preferable. He doesn't go to school in the mornings, but his older brother's school starts at 7:40 and they usually wake up together. On the weekends we push it a little later to 9 or 9:30.

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Old 10-20-2012, 07:00 AM
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When DDs were 4 bedtime was 7and up at 6:30 (they got up w/ DH) since they were small. It was just our family routine.


Now that they are 7 they are in bed at 7:30 lights out at 8 for school.


DH and I treasure our nighttime-- it is a priority for us to have time to relax and spend time together at the end of the day. It also allows us to discuss a variety of topics that do not need to be shared with young ears.. Yes, we discuss these things with our kids, but first we talk to make sure we have a united front and  find out how to discuss with kids (moving, jobs, etc).

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Old 10-20-2012, 07:04 AM
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Our 4 year olds are in bed and asleep between 6:30-7pm.  They are up for the day around 6am.  All of us (including two older children) are up and about in the mornings anywhere from 5:15 to 6:30am to get ready for work or school.  As much as I don`t always enjoy the early mornings they are necessary to get our day started off well and it gives dh and I an hour or two of time together at the end of the day (if we can convince oldest ds to have some quiet time before he goes to bed around 8:30-9pm).  Dh and I go to bed fairly early - by 10pm usually.

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Old 10-28-2012, 04:56 PM
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Typically the 4 and 5 year old start their bedtime routine at around 5 and in bed by about 5:30.  They both get to listen to their radios for a while (lullabies or fairy tales on CD's).  They aren't always asleep immediately but know it's light's out.  They're usually asleep by 6.  They get up at around 6.


DH and I retire anytime between 9 and 10:30 and wake up at around 7.


It's working now but I'm worried about how the new baby will affect things.  Meh.  I was just getting used to sleeping again after years of deprivation!!

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Old 10-31-2012, 02:44 AM
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Wow, there's some late bedtimes here! 4 yo (and 7 yo for that matter) both go to bed at 6.30pm and are asleep by 7pm.

It's complicated.
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Old 10-31-2012, 03:31 AM
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We start bedtime around 7:30 and they are usually in bed with stories finished by 8, they are 5 and 8. They do often have an audio book playing after that, but even DD has a "lights out" of 8:30.


They do tend to be up early, they were pottering around their rooms at 5:30 this morning! but moving bedtime later doesn't seem to change that so early bedtimes work here.

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Old 11-05-2012, 10:29 AM
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My DD (4 1/2) is typically in bed by 7:30/7:45 (the very earliest is 7) and usually takes 30 min-60 min to actually fall asleep, so she isn't typically asleep until 8 or 8:30 p.m.. Lately though she has been more tired due to pre-school and full days, so she's in bed by 7:15 and asleep by 7:45. That is BEST case scenario. She wakes up around 7:30-8 a.m. in the morning. 

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Old 11-05-2012, 10:47 AM
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A lot of late bedtimes here, perhaps because mostly SAHM responded?


Kids (5,3) read stories at 6:30 for awhile and hope to have them asleep by 7:30. They wake up at 6:30 most days for 11 hours of sleep.

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Old 11-05-2012, 11:35 AM
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8 PM is lights out, and he still naps pretty much every day.  He's an early bird too, and usually gets up at 6 AM or even earlier.  (And who are these kids who sleep in on the weekends, and where can I get one?  lol.gif )


I'm starting to see a bit of a shift, as in, he's often still awake when I sneak in to check on him at 9 PM, but since he's still a hard core napper and starting regular school next year (no naps), I'm hesitant to change our schedule only to change it back again...

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Old 11-05-2012, 12:55 PM
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i am not even sure if i should post here.


dd is now 10.


from birth to Kindergarten - dd went to bed anytime between midnight and 2 am. as a baby she had her last 2 am BIG feed and then really went to sleep for 3 or 4 hours. i was lucky dd was in afternoon K so we didnt have to be at school till 11 am.


by K dd was going to bed mostly around 10 - 11 pm. by first it was 8 so she'd be able to calm down and sleep by 9/9:30.


today in 5th grade we have the same routine. in bed by 8 or that child will not calm down. at 8 in bed reading, or me reading to her or us chatting. but on the weekends and holidays its again midnight.


she is a nightowl. when she goes to bed late, she used to get up late. but in teh last couple of years instead of getting up at 7 am she gets up at 6 some mornings. if she is up that early she has to go to bed early that evening.


yeah its complicated. she is a professional sleep fighter.

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Old 11-07-2012, 07:28 AM
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we're readjusting for daylight savings- but bedtime around here is mostly 7:30 for all 4 kids (1 1/2, 3, 4 1/2, and 6 1/2).  Sometimes the 6 1/2 year old gets to stay up later and help clean the kitchen or watch baseball or just hang out, but he's often the first asleep.  they're usually asleep (after chattering and singing and sneaking out a few times) by 8:30.  since they all wake up together in the morning around 6:30 or 7 regardless of bedtime, this is the only way for them all to be ready to face the day.  i'd like them to sleep in longer, but later nights have not helped (we have 2-3 nights a week where people are up til 8/8:30, but everyone is usually crashing over themselves and into things, and it actually feels cruel to keep them up like that!)


add to this that we have a mandatory naptime from 1-3 every afternoon (the 4 1/2 year old naps 3-4x a week) and we're getting a good amount of sleep around here.  


husband has odd hours and travels, so having enough time for mama to NOT be on duty and also to rest, as well as getting my 2 introverts quiet time and my one extrovert especially some alone time is key for us to all get along and enjoy each other. 

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Old 11-15-2012, 07:06 AM
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my 4 yo goes to bed between 7-8, and is up between 6-6:30 everyday (no matter when he goes to bed).


my 2 yo goes to bed around 10 if he has a nap, and is up between 7-8 in the morning. No nap and he's in bed by 6, up between 6-7. The early schedule is much more prefferable to me..  

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Old 11-15-2012, 08:48 AM
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My 4.5yr old goes to bed around 8:00 and wakes up around 7:00.
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Old 11-16-2012, 02:22 PM
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my 4 yr old (in full day kgarten) goes to bed at 9:30P and wakes at 7:30A.

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Old 03-27-2013, 04:44 PM
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Great to read this thread - I was feeling like a bad parent for letting my almost 5 yo stay up until 9-9:30, although we shoot for 8:30.  She's a trooper, once in bed, she will NOT get up, she is down for the night.  When lights are out, except hallway light, she knows I'm done.  Sometimes for a treat, we both snuggle up and might sleep on the couch for the night.


Counting my blessings again for my daughter who goes to bed with a minimum of fuss.  If she tries to resist, all I have to say:  "I love you, but I don't want to argue"


That said, from age 1 - 3, she was 7pm, regardless.


I remember as a kid going to bed about 7 until school age, but then again, maybe it's because there were 4 of us and my parents needed some breathing space.

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