I am wondering what people's experiences have been with sibling beds? (ie a shared sibling bed without parents). What age did you start a sibling bed? What are the ages of the children? What works or doesn't work well? Any ideas are appreciated!
I have a three year old and another soon to be here. I tried a family bed but I just don't sleep well enough for it, so I am feeling like a sibling bed might be the next best thing, but I am interested in others' experiences.
My olders shared a bed off an on from when they were 3ish and 7. My older didn't like to bed share even with me, but often he'd start out in the bottom bunk with his younger brother and move to his own. Perhaps others will chime in with their experience.
~Mama to my boys~ to a teen, a tween & a toddler and surro-mama to twins and their sister
Livin' in the sticks with my chicks and lovin' it!
2014: 4/52 projects 0/2014 things 0/52 books
We've kind of had musical beds in our home since the kids were little. lol I think sibling beds are great. I think it sounds like an excellent option for your family. In our case, the kids would sometimes share a bed starting around preschool age. The only problem we ever ran into was outside opinion, which can be downright dangerous nowadays. The kids will undoubtedly mention something that indicates bed sharing to someone. The older the were, the more likely someone was to pull me aside or jump to some weird conclusion. *eyeroll*
I'm trying to remember how old my dd was when she started sharing a room with ds. I think 2 yo. She was on the bottom (mattress on the floor) bunk and the bed was turned so the ladder was against the wall. This gave my ds the option of having his own space or bed sharing with dd, which was her preference. They are 5 and 7 now and on weekends I often find them sleeping together but during school nights my ds needs time to wind down on his own. They do enjoy sharing a room most of time.
The kids share a room, and the previous poster's description of " musical beds" is appropriate here, too. Right now, they have all made "new" beds on the floor, and all sleep next to each other.
I wouldn't put a baby with an child until the youngest was at least 3. Until then, our smallest either slept with me or in her own bed, alone.
(Before they had the queen size, they made a nest on the floor)
DS1 & DS2 pushed their beds together when they were 3 & 1...so cute!!
I hope we can transition them to bunk beds soon. Even though they like sleeping together, DS1 is a light sleeper and DS3 is a mover, a few nights a week DS1 needs to be rescued from DS3 trying to sleep on top of him/his pillow/his teddy bear...
My 5 & 9 year old daughters share a full size bed. They don't really have a choice, because we sold our house a couple of months ago and are kind of in transition in a small apartment while we wait to move into our new one. I'm surprised at how well it's worked out so far, though. We let them take turns sleeping on the sofa if they need some space. About once a week one of them will end up on the sofa for the night. In our new house they will each have their own bedrooms and I'm curious to see how it goes down...will they relish their own spaces or will they end up snuggling?
My kids are 3.5 and 6, and they have been sharing a full (double) bed for a few months. We tried it several times over the last 6-12 months, but they wouldn't fall asleep together.
It works well for us. Sometimes dd (6) complains that she doesn't want to sleep with ds, but we pretty much never put them to bed separately.
Usually one or both of them end up in our bed between 2 and 6am. It really sucks to have them both in our bed because we only have a queen with no bed rails, and I often don't get any more sleep after they squeeze in.
Dh and have occasionally wondered if they sleep better or worse together, but it seems to be going well now.
In my experience kids don't like sleeping alone, so the sibling bed is a great option if it works for your family.
My dd and ds have been sharing a bed for about a year now. They have separate (bunk) beds, but just prefer to sleep together-at least dd prefers to sleep in the bottom bunk with him, especially since I am still in there nursing him to sleep. It is a twin bed, but they sleep at opposite ends (feet together in the middle) and, minus the occasional squabble about kicking one another, it works fine. They are 3 and 6 now. They also both come into bed with me at some point in the night. I've considered just taking the bunks apart and putting the beds together to make one bigger bed, but the room is really just too small for that, so I think we'll just leave it like this until there is a reason to change.
Imagine the funny looks/judgment I get when I explain their bedsharing by pointing out that I still nurse my 3-year-old :)
My kids just started bedsharing and it's been working out great for us. Our kiddos are 5 and 3. They sleep much better together than in separate beds, and the little one (freshly moved from our bed) will wait until 4-8 am to crawl in with me. It's lovely.
SAHM to DS BuggaBoo 12/07, and DD Doozer 03/10. Sharing life with The Hubby since 01/05.
My DD(4) and DS(3) share a room, and have separate beds(bunk beds), but 9x out of 10 one either winds up in the others bed, or they come to my bed and snuggle on one side of the bed together lol. I was on board with a sibling bed since we had a spare king mattress for awhile, but I just don't want any hassle from others about it. We get enough flack for them sharing a room, let alone one bed so...
Wife to DH (12.10.2009), Anchorage based doula , Proud mama to Autumn (09.03.2008), Sylas (04.25.2010), (06.11.2012), Calliope(04.23.2013) .
I worry about this too, what others will think. I've told only select people that I know won't freak out on me.
SAHM to DS BuggaBoo 12/07, and DD Doozer 03/10. Sharing life with The Hubby since 01/05.
Our kids have bed-shared off and on since ds was old enough to climb out of his crib (21 months). They're now almost 6 (dd) and almost 4 (ds). We live in a developing country where we slept on mats on the floor for three years and it was perfectly normal for us to all sleep in one room due to cold in the winter (electricity gets cut out and it can get cold in the middle of the night) and hot in the summer (one "bed" room had a/c, the other didn't). They've been really flexible and sleep in bunk beds while we're in the states and now in a king size bed in the country we live in (we just moved into a bigger place and there were already 2 king sized beds here). I wouldn't dream of trying to separate them. I can hear them in bed right now telling each other stories to sleep. It's helped us be flexible travelers too as we can all sleep in one room any where, any time (of course it wasn't always this way :)).
I think it's interesting and unfortunate that many of you get eye-rolls and such. We're doing the same thing as many of you but for some reason, it's more acceptable since it's the "norm" where we live. Maybe we're already considered whacky for living in a poor country in Central Asia already so nothing else we could do would be too surprising :)
I think if your kids want to sleep together, why not let them? They'll probably figure out a way to jerry-rig something anyway (like many other posters have mentioned). If they sleep well together and no one is getting shorted sleep - I think it will work out beautifully.
So I have a few situations. WIth my first 2 kids girl and boy 18 months apart they started bed sharing when they were 3 and 4 and have continued until 6 months ago at ages 6-8 now my 8 year old ds bed shares with his 2 year old brother until he wakes to cometo me to nurse. And usually by then my 7yo dd is in me room also.WHEW
After reading this thread, I guess I should think twice about telling people my almost 9yo B/G twins share a bed. I met someone today with infant twins and she asked when my twins were put in separate rooms. I told her they have had separate rooms for several years but still prefer to sleep together. It never even crossed my mind that someone would have a problem with it. I do not think anyone has ever thought it odd...but then I am not good at reading subtle cues, maybe I just didn't notice.
Like pp's, we sort of have 'musical beds' in our house. All bedrooms have a full-sized bed. Sometimes my husband and I each sleep with one of the children, but most often they sleep together and we sleep in our room. Occasionally, but very rarely, the kids want to sleep in their own rooms apart. They sleep best together and they like to talk prior to falling asleep and in the morning.
To answer the OP, my children started sharing a bed around age 3.
8yo DS and 6yo DD have shared a bed since they were 2 and 4 years. DS had slept alone for 2 years, but DD was a clinger, so she moved from our bed direct to DS's bed. They share a queen. They love it. I remember at the time thinking that they started bonding really well at that time, and I think it is true. They are best friends. We have bedrooms enough for them to be on their own, but they have never asked. DD does now get dressed in her room and DS in his room, but they still sleep together in "his" room.
Don't know if anyone thinks it is odd or whatever. Don't care though.
I don't plan on it, but I know my DH's family had so many kids in a small space that they needed to bed share. He's from Romania and it is very acceptable there.
I remember sharing a bed with my sister sometimes when we were little, but it was just for fun and I had my own bed. And when we had friends over, we'd often turn the twin bed sideways and sleep on it. Or make beds on the floor and all sleep near each other. No big deal. But, now a days there are so many weird-minded people, I could see how some would find it strange as stupid as I think that is.
My kids do have to share bedrooms though and I think that is good for them.
Happily married Christian SAHM of 2 boys, DD1 , and DD2 July 2013
|Children , Sleep Sharing Configurations|