Raising an extrovert when you're an introvert. (responses very much appreciated!) - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 26 Old 11-20-2013, 05:23 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I wasn't sure where to post, but thanks in advance if you make it through this. I came to ask a simple question and ended up posting my entire thought process. 

 

So I've just read half of the book 'Raising your spirited child' and it was incredibly enlightening. I have always considered my four year old to be very demanding, high maintenance, intense, and just plain difficult at times. I love her more than anything and I have always had a feeling of guilt that I just don't do enough for her. After reading much of that book, something has just clicked. My daughter is an EXTREME extrovert/spirited child. I am extremely introverted, and so is my husband. I can see now just how much stress/tension/irritability/etc this causes for us all. What she needs to be happy is people, noise, movement, she needs to constantly be talking and making noise and to be DOING something at all times. That is what re-energizes her and makes her feel good. And unfortunately those are the things that drain me of my energy. I need quiet (at least sometimes) loud noises irritate me so much, movement irritates me (when it's bumping me or causes loud noises), I need a lot of time to gather my thoughts and just be alone... which I never get. I'm home all day with her and when my husband gets home he's drained within 5 or 10 minutes. We don't have a lot of family around who are able to babysit for breaks, and I don't have many options for friends with kids to do playdates with. We see my sister and her kids, and my ONE friend and her daughter a couple of times a week. 

 

I've honestly been at my wits end trying to keep this kid entertained every day. She will not play by herself. I have tried everything. Quiet time/alone time consists of her being extra noisy/throwing things/asking me questions/basically doing whatever she can to get attention. We have a lot of activities set up in almost every room, I will sit down and do them with her for a little while to get her going and she lasts two minutes once I'm doing my own thing. She hates being alone (as is normal with extroverted children, from what I've read!). We do a lot of activities together every day as well, there is just no balance and I can't catch a break. She gets a lot of snuggles and love, we go do activities outside of the house several times a week. I never feel like it's enough because whenever I am not doing something with her, she is demanding things/crying/screaming over every little thing. And meanwhile I'm just desperate for some peace with no way to get it. I'm sure at this point she is very aware of how to get on my nerves, by being extra disruptive and as noisy as possible when she can see I'm trying to concentrate on something. When she gets room time, she screams the ENTIRE time and will continuously peek her head out to ask questions or ask if she can come out yet. If I tell her it's not time yet (she gets 4 minutes) she slams the door and starts screaming again, then ten seconds later it's the same thing. 

 

This ended up being more of a rant... but I'm looking for advice from any introverted parents out there. How do you do it? How do you maintain your sanity? I am not a loud person by any means but by the time evening rolls around I feel like I am constantly irritated with her or we are all yelling. I have tried locking myself in the bathroom but she will just sit outside the door trying to talk to me. I need silence so bad. I really hate that my daughter mostly sees me feeling irritable and upset and just wanting some time to myself. 

 

In a way I'm glad to have discovered there's a reason why this has been so incredibly hard for me (parenting), for some reason it never clicked that I am introverted (I guess it makes sense as I have social anxiety as well). But at the same time I feel hopeless, like this will always be extra challenging and sometimes I just feel like I can't handle it. 

 

Thanks again if you made it all the way through this... any advice or insight would be so so appreciated!

 

(I forgot to add: I am home pre-schooling her because we make both too much (no assistance) and too little to afford pre-school. I take her to story time at the library each week so she has the chance to get some interaction with other kids---in addition to a visiting with my sister/friend and their kids each week.)

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#2 of 26 Old 11-20-2013, 06:08 PM
 
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Well, I have a 4 year old son,,, he sure likes to play and ask A LOT of questions....Make sure YOU get alone time during the day ,maybe send her to daycare once a week..and you just do nothing for a day....I also have a 2 year old son and he is one of a kind. Screams, throw things, pull ,pushes' bites,,,destroys everything... And just a few hours alone time for your self will help you.... Your child is who she is sometime you just have to deal with it....and enjoy the quite time you can have even if its just when she is sleeping .
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#3 of 26 Old 11-20-2013, 07:10 PM
 
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I was wondering that about pre-school too. Definitely no affordable program in your area? Even through the public school? Maybe this is all stuff you've done, but .... story times at other libraries, other free activities for kids, classes, etc? We are currently doing a 7-week toddler gymnastics class (one session per week) that cost $30 through our local rec center. We could get a membership at the science museum for under $100 for the year and we could then go play in the play area any time. Does getting physical and running around help her get some of her ya-yas out? I like the play area at the mall... she can run around and I can sit on the bench and spend some time inside my own head. I feel for you... I am an introvert as well, and I'm pretty sure my daughter is an introvert but she needs some socialization & a change of scenery; I try to get out each day. It sounds like it's even more so for you guys.  

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#4 of 26 Old 11-21-2013, 08:54 AM
 
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I'm in exactly the same boat. I'm an introvert and my 4 year son an extrovert. He loves to talk and gets all excited when we tell him about an upcoming party. My husband is an extrovert too though.

 

Here is what worked for us:

He loves Thomas the train. We watched videos of boys playing with their Thomas trains while acting out a story (youtube). He loved watching the videos. Then we got him started playing with his own set and acted out what happened in the video. Slowly, very slowly we could remove ourselves by saying, I need to do "insert something" and will be right back. We did what we said and came back. In the beginning he wanted us to continue to play, but after a while I could stay away longer and longer and he would just got me when he needed me. During the whole process, you need to be patient though. To be honest, I remember getting frustrated because I NEEDED to be alone right now not when he is ready. Needless to say, my DH did a lot of the "training".

 

Another thing you could try is audiobooks.

 

Good luck, I know how frustrating it can be.

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#5 of 26 Old 11-21-2013, 10:37 AM
 
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Was/am in the same boat except dd is 6.5 and she wasn't always an extrovert and wasn't as active as your lo. Well, if I never became friends with the moms at library or the park i was ok with taking her out as much as i could and I did. Maybe it was me but because i could happily stay in and never get out if i didn't need to, she actually developed terrible stranger anxiety and it was also a combination of the fact that she couldn't play outside as we ddin't hve a backyard and lived on a v. busy street so she never saw people. Well, her wellbeing made me get out and I think I made peace with the fact that I have to push myself to talk to people whoever - moms, dads, librarians - because of her. The one thing I absolutely hate at the moment is going to pick her up from school. All the parents gather outside at pickup time and it's a nightmare for me since I suffer from social anxiety too. I can deal with a few parents but so many at the same time is a bit much for my senses. Lol. Apart from that it's your dc's age. At that age they are v. dependent and I am pretty sure they have 'real' fears. If they can't see us like if I wanted to take a shower and wanted privacy she'd probably be v. scared and I couldn't tell then but now have realized that they are thinking of monsters and stuff at that age. Now, she can watch a dvd, play on the computer and do other stuff like doodle by herself and I am able to do my work, not really get any down time though, like take a nap. That's almost impossible as she will disturb me at some point. It does change with time but I know how frustrating it is while you're stuck. Will she be going to school next year?


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#6 of 26 Old 11-21-2013, 11:26 AM
 
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I have a fifth grader who is very extraverted and we homeschool. I am very introverted and one thing I wish I had done earlier is just tell her that I need time to myself. When I try to do social activity after social activity I just get completely worn out. I just started explaining the differences in her personality a couple years back but I think she would have understood it much earlier.  


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#7 of 26 Old 11-21-2013, 12:21 PM
 
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We're in the same situation, our oldest child who is now 7 is very extroverted, and hasn't stopped talking since he started (complete sentences by 10 months old). It is a bit better now that he can read and enjoys it enough that he goes to bed early so that he can read for an hour or so - that way my husband and I get some time to ourselves. It really hasn't been until recently, though, that he has been able to do that. 

 

So no real advice, except teach her to do things that are quieter, and as she grows up she will find other activities that are less dependent on you. 


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#8 of 26 Old 11-22-2013, 08:39 AM
 
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This will have to be brief for now, but here are a couple of thoughts... I could have written your post, with the exception that my husband is also extroverted, so when he is home, that takes some of the pressure off.  Although after DD goes to bed, my husband wants to talk, which is the last thing I feel like doing.  I also find the constant noise and movement exhausting.  What I have found helps me is taking my daughter to the playground every day and pushing her on the swing.  Seriously - rain, shine, snow... when she is on the swing she is still, quiet, and calm.  I'm trying to figure out a way that we can have a swing in our house - maybe a hammock chair.  She has also just reached the phase where she'll play with another child - 2 afternoons a week, I pick up a friend's daughter from her daycare, and they play together for an hour while I make dinner.  It's not exactly quiet, but at least the chatter isn't directed at me. 

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#9 of 26 Old 11-22-2013, 10:40 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mama2mygirl View Post
 

I have a fifth grader who is very extraverted and we homeschool. I am very introverted and one thing I wish I had done earlier is just tell her that I need time to myself. When I try to do social activity after social activity I just get completely worn out. I just started explaining the differences in her personality a couple years back but I think she would have understood it much earlier.  


This was great advice. Thank you mama2mygirl! I'm going to do this for sure.

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#10 of 26 Old 11-23-2013, 06:02 PM
 
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My situation sounds very much like yours. I am homeschooling for Prek and my daughter needs constant interaction from me, and I do mean constant. I also have a 17 month old son. My DD is 4.5 years old. So last week, we had a break through moment, I told her that I need time each day to do my own thing. For a solid 20 minutes I talked about the benefits of each person in our family having some time to do what they want and need without others. I said that I will benefit and she will benefit. We talked about how it is good for her to occupy herself and play without any input from me. Mostly I foucused on how I need this time. She listens to Sparkle Stories (Martin and Sylvia) on the computer and these two siblings have quiet or rest time each day. I talked about how Martin and Sylvia have rest time each day and they have fun doing it. I decided to call her time "Free Play." I basically said that she can be anywhere in the house doing whatver she wants as long as it is quiet and doesn't involve me. I said that I will be nearby doing my work and quiet time. What worked for her is that I wasn't putting her in her own room and telling her she had to stay there. She was free to do whatever! I turn on my oven stove vent on high so we can't really hear eachother and I do my thing while she does her thing. The first day it lasted 90 minutes. She had a blast. It was like she needed it too but I had to help her get there. We now do this almost everyday...usually not on the weekends. So now what I am seeing is that she is adding quiet moments like this even when it isn't "free play" granted they don't last 90 minutes, but it seems she is learning to play by herself. All this had to happen because I felt like I was going crazy on the inside. I just needed quiet and alone time and I could not get it. So anyway, this worked for us and I had to share our success because your story sounds so much like mine. If you haven't heard of Sparkle Stories, I 100% recommend them. Maybe she could even listen to those during her quiet time. We don't do tv or videos of any kind so this is the closest thing for her. She loves it and probably would choose it over TV is given the choice. You can find free stories on itunes and their blog. Hug fan of them. Good luck! I know how you feel. 

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#11 of 26 Old 12-08-2013, 09:45 AM
 
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I am introverted (slight expression, no social anxiety, but I need alone time to recharge) raising an extroverted 6 year old (and her 3 year old sister, who is more like me). I highly recommend you pursue preschool options again, even if it's a home daycare, parks and recs. co ops are great and affordable. You may be right that there are no options, but you never know.

My extroverted child needs to be busy. Homeschooling for her would be a nightmare. Summers between school, I had trouble keeping her busy and on home days (that me and her sister craved in between activities) she was always misbehaved and incredibly demanding of my time (could not self entertain for more than a minute). I signed her for summer classes/parks preschool and it all got better and I felt like I could give her 100% again.

While she does play with her sister, her play isn't advanced enough yet to satisfy her, so it only helps a bit.

I would do everything to get her into school, even I'd it meant a part time job. I know that's sacrilege to say on this forum, lol, but having dealt with this, it solves so many issues. My dd is a dream now that she is in full day kindy.
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#12 of 26 Old 12-08-2013, 10:23 AM
 
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I realized this about my DD at about age 18 months. I work part time and she was with a nanny and between the two of us, we could not keep her in kids! We went to this local indoor play park, pretty much every day it was open, and scheduled lots of play dates. At that age I realized she was much happier if she spent the day surrounded by other kids so I moved her into daycare. I cannot imagine homeschooling my DD, she is an only and thrives on being around other kids. She is 10 now and I still have to make sure she gets enough herd time. Luckily she loves to read so that ensures me some quiet time at home. I also sometimes stay up late or get up early to sneak in some quiet time for me. DH is also fairly extroverted so it helps to let them chat it out. I agree with the PP that I would try everything I could to send her to preschool orat least find some regular play dates or playgrounds.
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#13 of 26 Old 12-08-2013, 05:14 PM
 
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You might also like to check out another book by the author of the "Spirited Child" books, "Kids, Parents, and Power Struggles" (the title doesn't really reflect the content) also by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. It goes over some of the same territory as the Spirited Child books, but this one resonated more with me because it's more about the different temperaments that different kids and parents can have so it addresses your concerns directly.

 

My kids are fairly middle of the introvert/extravert spectrum, but dd1 leans a little more to the introverted side. I'm very introverted. When they were little I used to tell them that "my ears were tired" because really it was about me. I couldn't handle the chatter any more. They were just being kids. They understood that, but didn't take it as a negative reflection on their behavior. 

 

If you can connect with some other moms you may find having adult conversation, while not alone time, is less demanding than kid conversation, and the kids can play and get some of their needs met. 


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#14 of 26 Old 12-09-2013, 08:17 PM
 
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Oh my, I could have written this post! The only difference is that my daughter is the spirited, demanding, extrovert and my son is the can't-play-alone-or-stand-to-be-in-another-room extrovert. So it sounds like your daughter is my two kids put together, but we likely have similar homes. :-) I am very much the same as you--need quiet but don't get it, can't stand loud noises or constant contact. Being a SAHM doesn't allow for any quiet time, but I take heart knowing that when they're both in school full time, I'll have more than I need and will surely long for the days of my extroverts constantly buzzing around me. 

 

I do find that going out helps me--park, hanging in the library kids' section, nature walks, etc. Although I don't feel that playdates remedy the situation because they require me to be "on" even more than usual---socially with other moms, and also keeping watch over my spirited little ones. So for me, frequent playdates are draining and I plan them sparingly.

 

You mentioned that you go to story time but do you have any other indoor playspace that you could take your daughter to and provide you with a few minutes of reading or just being alone in your own thoughts?

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#15 of 26 Old 01-04-2014, 03:11 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thank you so much for all these responses! I made this account mainly to make that post and then things have been really busy with Christmas so I am just now reading all your comments. There were some great suggestions. Some of them I have been trying throughout the past month. Some things that have helped are discussing my need for a quiet time each day with her. We do about thirty minutes and even though she asks if it can be over a few times throughout, overall it does wonders because she plays by herself the majority of the time and I get a little break. I have looked into more preschool options, I found one that is 45$ a month and it has a two month program that gets them ready for kindergarten which is 65$ so I will be signing her up for that asap. I've also signed her up for a weekly dance class at the rec center that starts this coming Wednesday, and she'll still attend story time at the library on Tuesdays. 

 

The weather has made things very difficult. With Christmas to look forward to it wasn't so bad, but I know January and February are some of my hardest months because of how cold and dreary it is. We only have one car atm and my husband is gone at work all day so we're kind of trapped in the house a lot. I will look into sparkle stories, I think she would love that. 

 

For now I am working on explaining to her when I need some time to myself, instead of just getting frustrated throughout the day trying to spend every second with her. This has helped me give her my undivided attention more often and I know any one on one time she gets just makes her day. I try and play/chat/be silly with her as often as I can - this week I've done pretty well but today I can tell I am desperate need of a break. 

 

My husband really wants to have another baby (I get excited at the idea too), but I'm honestly scared because of how introverted/shy I am and because dd is so high demand. DD asks me for a brother or sister almost every day. I just don't know if it's a good idea considering I have such a hard time with things that seem to come naturally to most moms... sometimes I don't know if I could handle it. 

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#16 of 26 Old 01-04-2014, 03:59 PM
 
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For me, having two is really great. It was definitely hard at the beginning. Mine are 2yrs 9 mo apart. Once dd2 got old enough to really play with dd1 it's been great, though. They have entertained each other for years now and are still great friends. 


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#17 of 26 Old 01-05-2014, 08:42 AM
 
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I haven't read all of the responses, so apologies if I'm repeating some things. My DS7 is moderately extroverted, my DH and I are both introverts. Here are a few survival tips: 

 

1. an hour or so of tv each day for your DD when it gets to be too much. We aren't fans of television, but I found that if I keep it in context, my DS has a pretty healthy attitude toward electronics. 

2. I second daycare, mom's days out, private sitter, anything you can swing

3. keep in mind that this may not be purely extroversion. Four is a hard age for kids to occupy themselves and she may want your attention because she hasn't figured out how to be on her own yet. Keeping a small table for arts and crafts etc. in the kitchen where she has your presence, may help. My son did not like being alone at this age- so we stayed "present" but dialed back on constant input. 

4. As she gets older, start pushing back on comments like "I'm bored." My son doesn't complain much about being "bored" because he's learned through trial and error that he will find himself cleaning something. Providing a lot attention or electronics (tv, computer) to alleviate boredom will cause your DD to be more demanding Another mothering parent has a list of activities on her refrigerator for her older kids to choose from when they are at loose ends. 

5. Taking a few minutes to respond to non emergency requests may gradually help your DD build patience. 

6. I really agree with the parent who said that they just explain that "mommy needs some alone time." Don't expect that to sink in at four, but it lays the groundwork for later. 

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#18 of 26 Old 01-07-2014, 11:28 PM
 
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Originally Posted by randomgirl View Post
 

My husband really wants to have another baby (I get excited at the idea too), but I'm honestly scared because of how introverted/shy I am and because dd is so high demand. DD asks me for a brother or sister almost every day. I just don't know if it's a good idea considering I have such a hard time with things that seem to come naturally to most moms... sometimes I don't know if I could handle it. 

there is a lot of difference in parenting an onlie and parenting two kids. 

 

i have an onlie. my friend has 4. and she has always felt compassion towards me as she finds my life so much harder. 'see at least i have my own space. my kids play with each other and not me. there is not that much demand on my time. but you - you have to be both a parent AND a playmate. that is hard."


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#19 of 26 Old 01-08-2014, 02:57 PM
 
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I've had a couple of friends say something similar... it was really hard when the first kid was a toddler because they needed a parent to play with them constantly, but when the second one was a toddler they just played with their older sibling. 

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#20 of 26 Old 01-09-2014, 04:15 AM
 
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Please share your thoughts/perspective. I'm introverted but usually don't have a big problem participating in "larger" groups etc. by myself. I usually find one or two people I can talk to and find my way into the group that way. However, since I have my son, and go to activities with him I really have a hard time controlling my anxiety around group activities.

 

I go to a mother and child gymnastics class. It's actually very relaxed and quite fun for everybody. The moms are nice as well. Despite all this, I come home totally drained and with signs of real distress. I just don't get it. It feels like, I constantly monitor me and my son to not disturb, make a bad impression, etc. on the other moms. When I try to say something nice, chime in the conversation, it just doesn't roll of my tongue as relaxed and fun as I want it to be. Anybody else has that issue? Any ideas? Am I too stiff? Sigh.

 

Everybody told me, oh it will be easier with a kid, but nope, not for me. When I start talking to a nice mom, he pulls me away or her kid needs her...it's always like that.

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#21 of 26 Old 01-11-2014, 05:28 PM
 
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will come back to this.

 

my first was an EXTROVERT.  like, never a thought inside his own head and very needy extrovert.  i am an introvert.  like read books and talk quietly w/ one friend a day is enough introvert.

 

we were good for each other.  but i can't stay and write too much now.  

 

i have a lot more LO's now and the dynamic is so charged, but i feel so blessed that i had my little opposite to help me prepare for doing what i'm doing now.

 

it's hard!!!


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#22 of 26 Old 01-14-2014, 05:43 PM
 
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I am an extrovert who still likes some times to recharge, with an extremely extroverted husband.  We have an introverted 7 year old daughter and a needy extroverted 5 year old son.  He wears us all out with the amount of interaction he needs.  Between the three of us, I think we satisfy his needs!  I'm looking forward to him becoming an independent reader.  He LOVES when we read him stories so I'm hopeful that that will be an outlet for him to be independent.

 

One thing that's worked for him is to keep him involved in outside activities.  He needs a LOT of exercise and physical input (just like my husband, honestly) and that helps him be a bit more independent when he's at home.  I love hanging out with him (of course) but the problems come in when we need to get stuff done (chores, homework, etc) and he is craving interaction.  Giving him bursts of intense interaction with us or in an activity helps sustain him.  

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#23 of 26 Old 01-15-2014, 10:50 AM
 
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^^^what she said!

 

when i had my first, my husband and i were both in grad school.  i never thought we'd go to traditional gender roles or that my child would be SO INTENSE from the moment of birth (okay, the 3 days it took to have him ) and then never stop!!!

 

He wouldn't let me put him down, feed myself, shower, he needed me face to face w/ him ALL THE TIME.  this was a rather shocking experience for this new mom.  I read all these books about how you read to them (ha), sit w/ them (double ha), rest w/ them (wtf?) and then i had this bundle of intensity.  when he was 3 months old i figured out he would nap and be happier if i took him out in the morning and we did an 'adventure' this could be going to the coffee shop and letting him flirt w/ every person in the place, walking to the park and letting him watch other people play, wandering around a store so he could try and smile at every single person who passed us.  so our routine began.  I took him out daily, for an hour or 2 hours, to stimulate him.  then he would be happy and actually rest.  by the time he was a year, we had a weekly schedule- monday morning park/beach, monday afternoon coffeeshop w/ kids songs (and friends), tuesday playgroup, wednesday park, etc etc.  and i had to stick to that plan (and verbally repeat and explain it ad nauseam) and he just blossomed.  our relationship grew, i learned that i needed quiet time (and honestly, so did he, otherwise he would work himself into an angry crying fit b/c of overstimulation), and we found a way for me to make sure he got his extrovert time and i had my down time.

 

i'm so so so glad i learned that early and quickly w/ him.  he's still my hardest kid to be patient w/.  when he was 2, i remember thinking 'it's so cute!  he tells me everything he thinks when he's thinking it!  someday he won't.' and now that he's almost 8, i laugh b/c he still doesn't really have internal thoughts- he can (when he's really stratagizing how to make something social happen) but it's a rarity.

 

i have 2 more introverts, and then had my next extrovert.  i will say, i'm biased towards the extroverts b/c social rewards are SO MUCH MORE effective for kids who really care about that sort of thing.  they are so much easier to take places, and set expectations, and they care and understand what others expect and desire from them.  compare that to my introverted girls- who cannot be reasoned into anything they don't want to do b/c whatever- they don't CARE if no one is around, or they can't play w/ friends.  That said- the balance for a family is very similar for both introverts and extroverts.  Both need friends and social time, both need down time and quiet time, both thrive on routine and consistent expectations.  Setting up a life that meets YOUR needs for rest and quiet, and your kids needs for interaction and social activity is just hard and when it's going well, it's really awesome.  and then it needs tweaking, b/c once you figure something out, something else changes and you need to update it.

 

hope that helps some!!!!  i hide in the bathroom in the tub somedays when my husband gets home (granted lately it's been w/ only 2 kids b/c they love baths), somedays i just read on the couch and shut people out.  but i need to stay out of that funk too, so keeping our life and daily rhythms balanced is really in the best interests of us all.


joy.gifSAHM and Holistic Health Counselor with  angel.gif 1/05, DS1 blahblah.gif 3/06, angel1.gif 5/07, DD1 dust.gif 3/08, DD2 thumbsuck.gif 11/09, DD3 energy.gif 4/11, and DS2 babyf.gif 2/13.  expecting a surprise stork-suprise.gif 8/14!
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#24 of 26 Old 01-17-2014, 05:58 AM
 
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Originally Posted by xDaisyx View Post
 

Please share your thoughts/perspective. I'm introverted but usually don't have a big problem participating in "larger" groups etc. by myself. I usually find one or two people I can talk to and find my way into the group that way. However, since I have my son, and go to activities with him I really have a hard time controlling my anxiety around group activities.

 

I go to a mother and child gymnastics class. It's actually very relaxed and quite fun for everybody. The moms are nice as well. Despite all this, I come home totally drained and with signs of real distress. I just don't get it. It feels like, I constantly monitor me and my son to not disturb, make a bad impression, etc. on the other moms. When I try to say something nice, chime in the conversation, it just doesn't roll of my tongue as relaxed and fun as I want it to be. Anybody else has that issue? Any ideas? Am I too stiff? Sigh.

 

Everybody told me, oh it will be easier with a kid, but nope, not for me. When I start talking to a nice mom, he pulls me away or her kid needs her...it's always like that.

I know what you mean. But I don't have any advice because i still feel like this even though dd is almost 7. I'd suggest you start a new thread on this.


Positive thoughts generate power, negative ones waste it ~ Unknown
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#25 of 26 Old 01-19-2014, 07:49 PM
 
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I am so a member of this club.  I don't have much time to write now, but I've been following along, and I SO know where you're coming from.  My DD is almost 4 and she's let up a lot since a year or so ago, but she still calls out to me every 45 seconds in the midst of her so-called independent play.  I just start to do something and - BAM.  Mommy! 

 

I also have had a very lonely time of parenthood so far.  I've always made friends with people that I share a regular activity/life with - like classmates and co-workers.  The friendship just grows out of our daily interaction.  I have no clue how to just make friends with someone that I see irregularly and am not really sharing an activity with while we're together.  I have lots of mom acquaintances, people we see frequently all over town, and I watch these women join up into little groups of friends right before my very eyes.  But...I'm just an acquaintance.

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#26 of 26 Old 01-19-2014, 08:59 PM
 
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Facebook groups have been great for me, newmamalizzy. I joined a breastfeeding support group after my daughter was born. The physical group had a Facebook counterpart and I became better acquainted with people there. Through some of them I was invited to another group aimed at SAHMs, which is both a group and also a forum to set up in-person meetings, and have gotten closer to some of those moms. 

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