8 year old refusing daycare - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 9 Old 05-23-2017, 09:56 PM - Thread Starter
 
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8 year old refusing daycare

I am currently working from home, and my wife works a varying schedule. My son is with me until my wife gets off work three days a week. During the summer, my son goes to daycare on Wednesdays regardless of whether we work so we can have a break from him.

Tonight, we told him he's going to daycare tomorrow. He got angry and kept insisting that he does not want to go to daycare anymore. He has been happy to go the previous summers. He stated that the reason is that daycare "is full of babies" and that "they will make him go to sleep".

My wife's mother does keep him on the weekends for a few hours. She agreed to keep him this time, but she is getting old (75) and may not want to keep him on a regular basis. I'm also looking for a full-time job outside of the home, and I'm concerned that will be an issue if my son needs child care every weekday.

I'm wondering that if maybe he's too old for daycare. My main concern is when I get a full-time job, with him not wanting daycare and his grandmother possibly not wanting the workload, what do you think?
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#2 of 9 Old 05-23-2017, 11:34 PM
 
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I'm not sure where you live but 8yo does seem very old to me. In Australia, most 8yos would be at school during the day. Then in some sort of after school care if their parents worked beyond school hours.

Is there a family day care mum who does older children who could pick him up from school? And maybe a summer camp or something for during the holidays? Those things might be more age appropriate for him.


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#3 of 9 Old 05-24-2017, 05:20 AM
 
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There are different types of daycares, if he is the only older kid it would be dreadfully boring for sure. This is the age I agree, that kids get involved in things like martial arts, baseball, soccer or go to arts camps etc. Does he not have any friends? Can you find other families with kids he could play with and maybe swap times where you share childcare? We have a Boys and Girls club near us as well as recreation centres, sports clubs and a YMCA, they all run children's programs. We also have local moms who look after other kids, I see them with other kids all of the time. I think by 8 we dropped daycare because my son was in school all day, so we switched to an after school program.
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#4 of 9 Old 05-24-2017, 04:09 PM
 
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Is he homeschooled? Can you trade playdates with another HS family? Send him to a friend on Wed and then give that family a break on another day. Where I live, daycares would only take an 8yo for before and after school care. No one would take an 8yo during the school day bc all kids are either in school or the have a SAHP who HS them.

That said, you are the parent and if you need him to go to daycare one day a week, do not be afraid to make it so.

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#5 of 9 Old 05-28-2017, 11:57 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steadytrying View Post
I am currently working from home, and my wife works a varying schedule. My son is with me until my wife gets off work three days a week. During the summer, my son goes to daycare on Wednesdays regardless of whether we work so we can have a break from him.

Tonight, we told him he's going to daycare tomorrow. He got angry and kept insisting that he does not want to go to daycare anymore. He has been happy to go the previous summers. He stated that the reason is that daycare "is full of babies" and that "they will make him go to sleep".

My wife's mother does keep him on the weekends for a few hours. She agreed to keep him this time, but she is getting old (75) and may not want to keep him on a regular basis. I'm also looking for a full-time job outside of the home, and I'm concerned that will be an issue if my son needs child care every weekday.

I'm wondering that if maybe he's too old for daycare. My main concern is when I get a full-time job, with him not wanting daycare and his grandmother possibly not wanting the workload, what do you think?
What is the age of the child? Is it 8 years? You must discuss with him why he really doesn't want to go to the daycare centre and in what games he is interested. Let him do what he likes.
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#6 of 9 Old 06-02-2017, 10:25 AM
 
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My son just turned 9 and my daughter is 10, so the general age is familiar.

At 8, they would have hated daycare where they were the oldest and they had to take naps. Or even daycare where there were a lot of babies and toddlers and only a few kids their age. They don't want to be considered "little kids," and their interests are completely different. Their focus has really expanded from when they were younger.

Depending where you are, local schools or community centers may have affordable programs. If one of us is not available for our kids after school, and they have no other plans (like going home on the bus with a friend), they stay in the school's aftercare. They're there with their peers, so although they don't like it, they don't hate it. In summer, we use daycamps. Some are pricey, some are not, some offer financial aid, which we don't need but we know is available. The local schools offer very affordable summer programs at some of the elementary schools that are open even to kids not enrolled in the schools - homeschooled or charter school kids.

I would explore your area. There have to be other parents in the same predicament - you just have to find them and find out what they do.
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#7 of 9 Old 06-14-2017, 05:32 AM
 
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I'm sorry you have these issues. My daughter goes to a wonderful Daycare Toronto and she loves being there! The staff work their butt's off taking care of our children. I applaud this daycare provider, its not easy taking care of the kids at one time and still providing individual love and caring to each and every one.

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#8 of 9 Old 07-25-2017, 03:03 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by steadytrying View Post
I am currently working from home, and my wife works a varying schedule. My son is with me until my wife gets off work three days a week. During the summer, my son goes to daycare on Wednesdays regardless of whether we work so we can have a break from him.

Tonight, we told him he's going to daycare tomorrow. He got angry and kept insisting that he does not want to go to daycare anymore. He has been happy to go the previous summers. He stated that the reason is that daycare "is full of babies" and that "they will make him go to sleep".

My wife's mother does keep him on the weekends for a few hours. She agreed to keep him this time, but she is getting old (75) and may not want to keep him on a regular basis. I'm also looking for a full-time job outside of the home, and I'm concerned that will be an issue if my son needs child care every weekday.

I'm wondering that if maybe he's too old for daycare. My main concern is when I get a full-time job, with him not wanting daycare and his grandmother possibly not wanting the workload, what do you think?
Why did you put him in daycare? He will be grown and gone soon. If you really wanted a break, why not a summer day camp. As in, a real summer day camp. Or even an over night camp. But a daycare for an 8 yr old whose parent is at home, just not right. I am with your son on this.
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#9 of 9 Old 07-31-2017, 03:57 AM
 
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I agree the kid needs stimulating activities to fully develop the senses. Summer camp should definitely be a good choice.

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