Boys & dresses/pink/long hair etc - Page 4 - Mothering Forums

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#91 of 99 Old 03-10-2006, 11:28 AM
 
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I should have noticed that there was a lack of boy's underwear in the wash,but just didn't.I realised when he came from school and changed into his skirt that when he sat on the floor I could see he was wearing panties.Not just any panties but white silky ones of his older sister.I asked him where he got them and he told me his sister had given him a few pairs -which she later confirmed - but he liked theses ones best I told him if he was wearing a skirt he needed to be more careful and not show off his underwear and that he really should wear a slip with that skirt.
I think he is becoming more feminine and seems to be accepted that way by his sister and her friends but should I ban him from dresses for his own good ?
Any thoughts ?
Paula
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#92 of 99 Old 04-03-2006, 03:11 AM
 
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My MIL told me yesterday "I didn't like that pink diaper on him, it looked like you were trying to turn him into a faggot" : I said "that's not very christian like of you, besides pink is just a color and even if he were gay it wouldn't matter to me anyway" She didn't say anything after that

Unassisted birthing, atheist, poly, bi WOHM to 4 wonderful, smart homeschooling kids Wes (14) Seth (7) Pandora Moonlilly (2) and Nevermore Stargazer (11/2012)  Married to awesome SAH DH.

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#93 of 99 Old 04-07-2006, 11:58 PM
 
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Yikes Barbara. I'm sorry your MIL said that! Those kind of comments make my skin crawl. You handled it superbly!

I've been meaning to check in on this thread...

How's everyone? How are our little guys? Mine I think is starting to become more inhibited about his girl wear, except when around us or his close buddy. Even without attending school and being in a more or less tolerant environment such is our town, he still senses the social "norms." *sigh* I do however believe also that he's just not in an overly feminine place right now. Of course, it's all relative because I say this at a time when his hair is about half way down his back and he will wear nothing but girls leggings, and his favorite jammies are decorated sky blue with clouds, moons and stars on them. It does wax and wane... a few months ago, he wore nothing but dresses and fairy wings for weeks on end so right now, he seems less feminine to me, but to others... let's just say he's been called a girl at least 4 times this week and we've only really been out about 4 times. He's really great about speaking up for himself these days. The other day he just said to one lady, sweet as you please, "Actually, I'm a boy. I've got long hair." And you know, I'm not entirely sure she believed him.

At any rate, he's happy, seemingly content with his multi sided self. And ok, I think he's just about as cute as they come but of course, I'm biased.

How are things with everyone else???

The best,
Em

Em 43 - Wife to hubby Mom to DS born: Jan. '01
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#94 of 99 Old 04-08-2006, 08:48 PM
 
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I am so happy to find other moms with sons who are feminine. My son Chrissie adores dressing up in girls clothes and has done so since he/she was 2 or 3. It started when s/he started asking me if I could paint his fingier nails to look like mine because he wanted to look pretty too. So I decided to bring home some cute outfits from the girls dept to see if he would wear them. Just short sets and tops. And he loved them. Pretty soon we were going to the store and when we went through the girls department at Targets I asked if there was anything he would like and he was begging me to buy him skirts and tops and dresses not to mention undies. Since I am divorced and we are the only ones at home I didn't think it was harmful and made him very happy. Now at age 8 Chriss is my dd whenever she is at home and most of the time when we go out and I couldn't be happier.
I have done a lot of reading about transgendered children and recently saw a documentary and the one thing that all the girls, now grown up, had in common as children was the deep hurt and regret that they had hide who they were and couldn't enjoy being little girls like they really felt they were. My Chrissie is going to enjoy who she is and improve her self-esteem.
Tina
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#95 of 99 Old 08-06-2006, 01:47 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tinastone
…Pretty soon we were going to the store and when we went through the girls department at Targets I asked if there was anything he would like and he was begging me to buy him skirts and tops and dresses not to mention undies. Since I am divorced and we are the only ones at home I didn't think it was harmful and made him very happy. Now at age 8 Chriss is my dd whenever she is at home and most of the time when we go out and I couldn't be happier.
…*…
My Chrissie is going to enjoy who she is and improve her self-esteem.
Tina
Tina,
I am rather late on the scene with this thread, having not been on MDC for a while and have only just discovered it. However some of the moms here may well remember my posts in the Gender variant/transgendered children thread here on MDC.
I, too, have a transgendered dc who has been expressing as a girl at home since she was less than 3. She has had long hair for most of her short life and has always been into "girl things" and was constantly annoying her elder sis by "borrowing" her clothes. I was constantly told by the "experts" that she would grow out of it. I must have been told, "It's just a phase," a hundred times. She is now 10 and on July 4th attended school as a girl for the first time. Before that, even when wearing boys' school uniform, she looked like a girl with a long ponytail in a pink scrunchy. She behaved in a very girlis manner, playing with the girls and used to get teased constantly; but funnily enough since she has transitioned at school and now wears teh girls' uniform (a checked dress in summer) she has been accepted by the other girls in her year (grade in US) as one of them and most of the boys accept her for what she is; although there are a couple of boys who steer clear of her because, they say, they don't want to catch whatever it is that made her become a girl!!!
The most heartening thing is that her schoolwork has improved immeasurably and got a really good end of term report for about the first time in her life. She is on vacation just now and enjoying the company of her sibs (1 elder sis and 2 younger bros) and her best friend (another girl) who has been faithful to her since they first met 5 years ago.
She is a delightful child, loving, happy, bubbly, — a typical little girl.
In later years I shall be able to look back on her girlhood with pleasure and happiness.

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#96 of 99 Old 08-06-2006, 06:04 PM
 
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I really love so many of the responses tothis thread and found some great reassurance heer as my 5 year old son loves pink and many girly things and I find myslef at moments so utterly proud of his bravery to express himself outside of teh box but then other moments I worry I am setting him up for a life of teasing. Ifeel much more confident in allowing him to be himself no matter what now. Thank you for that.
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#97 of 99 Old 08-07-2006, 12:38 AM
 
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Originally Posted by Embee
I do however believe also that he's just not in an overly feminine place right now.
I just had to laugh when I reread this post and happened to notice the date. DS was exactly one day away from a 3+ month long OBSESSION with Laura Ingalls.

The best to all! Would love some updates on your boy/girls!

Em

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#98 of 99 Old 08-07-2006, 02:17 AM
 
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i posted on this a loooooooooooooong time ago.. so..an update on us..

elwynn has gone back and forth between loving having long hair and wanting it shorter(we cut it to chin length just the other day..with bangs. SO sweet).. and loving pink and girly stuff and wanting to be more of a "boy" he finally started to correct people "im a BOY" when people say things like "what a beautiful little girl you have" he still likes wearing dresses and girlish stuff sometimes but the older he gets the more he sees how others react to it (like my mom for instance who has a big problem with it) and so he is way less inclined.. i wonder if it was more my dressing him like a girl and encouraging play with dolls and gender nutral toys rather than boy stuff (which by the way he LOVES..cars. oh. my ...)that has made him more of a girly boy.. but none the less he is small and fine featured and beautiful.. he is such a sensitive little person and i think others reactions to him looking and acting girly really effect him hopefully im doing a good job keeping him feeling like an individual and empowered to be whoever he is in this world.

 

 

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#99 of 99 Old 08-07-2006, 09:20 AM
 
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Well, my son has very, very short hair, but his favorite color is still pink and he absolutely adores anything with sparkles on it. He seems to me to be a very masculine child who likes to wear pink sparkles.

Rynna, Mama to Bean (8), Boobah (6), Bella (4) and Bear (2)
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