Do little girls NEED panties? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 43 Old 03-23-2005, 12:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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DD (3.5) has decided she likes to be free. :LOL There are many days where she doesn't want to wear panties. I think it might be at least partly because she keeps getting them on backwards. With help, she doesn't mind wearing them, but when she gets herself dressed, she just skips 'em. So is there any reason she needs to wear them? Is it just a cultural habit? Or is there a hygine reason?

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#2 of 43 Old 03-23-2005, 12:05 PM
 
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My Mom has always told me panties were made when it wasn't easy to wash your clothes. But, it was easy to wash panties, because they were small and easy to dry. So, you would smell up your panties and then wash them and your clothes would stay cleaner longer. Now, that it is so easy to wash clothes, panties are more of a habit than a necessity.

The only concern I would have about dd is if she is still in that age where she would flash her panties (if she had any on) If she is aware and would keep her body covered, I don't think I would care.
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#3 of 43 Old 03-23-2005, 12:21 PM
 
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I go commando frequently, and have since childhood. As an adult, it is comfy and DH loves it, esp. when I wear skirts. As a child, it was simply comfortable.

I see no problem with it.

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#4 of 43 Old 03-23-2005, 12:23 PM
 
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hlkm2e made me think. Washing your clothes less often does make them last longer and consume less detergent, energy, water, etc. But, with a three year old, you have to wash often anyway.

Also, I do admit to occasionally getting pinched by the crotch of my pants. That's not fun, but not particularly painful.

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#5 of 43 Old 03-23-2005, 12:28 PM
 
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In this day and age, if she's wearing a skirt or dress outside, I think she should wear them. My 4yo hates them too, and I don't care in the house, or if she's wearing pants, but otherwise she has to. Unfair, I know. It also makes others uncomfortable.
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#6 of 43 Old 03-23-2005, 12:46 PM
 
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I dont wear panties and dd doesnt either...Unless like IrishMommy said she is wearing a skirt or dress outside. Sometimes she choses to wear them, most of the time she dosent.

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#7 of 43 Old 03-23-2005, 12:50 PM
 
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My 4 yo son hates underwear and I made a deal with him if he goes to the dr he has to put them on. My 3 yo dd also does not like to wear them. In the house I do not mind out in public she has to put them on until we get home. Both of my dd has/ had kidney reflux and often got uti's . When my olest dd was little and now with the 3 yo girls sometimes get the crotch of their undies wet. Mine would often get yeast infections. It is very humid and hot here also because of the anibiotics for the uti's. Our dr said it was better for them to go "commando" sice this allowed the area to air out and stay dry. Since we "let go" of societies "norms" my dd have had a lot less yeast infections since they no longer sit in panties that are damp from dribble or sweat. Hope it helps.
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#8 of 43 Old 03-23-2005, 12:54 PM
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I think panties are so silly and overrated. I go commando almost all the time unless I am in a shorter skirt, I don't want to flash anyone!! Now that I am pregnant I wear them a bit more because of tiny leaks : but that comes with the territory!

I wouldn't make my daughter wear them at all unless she was in a dress, because we all know little girls are not the most concious of who and where they are unintentionally flashing while playing etc...and there are some sick people...

Otherwise, I wouldn't care.
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#9 of 43 Old 03-23-2005, 03:11 PM
 
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One other consideration. My dd (5yo)will "fiddle" every chance she gets. This is accepted at home, but it makes me uncomfortable out. The way I limit it is limiting easy access. Although I admit panties aren't much of an inhibitor. If we are going to be somewhere that I will be really uncomfortable by fiddling she has to wear pants or tights. Although I don't tell her that is why she has to wear them.
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#10 of 43 Old 03-23-2005, 05:03 PM
 
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The only other consideration I would add is how well does she clean herself after using the bathroom? My dd's are still fairly new to the wiping game, and I would rather they wear panties to catch the dribbles (or worse) that they miss.
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#11 of 43 Old 03-23-2005, 05:44 PM
 
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If she doesn't wear dresses, I'd say fine. If she does wear dresses, I'd talk her into some kind of little shorts or something. Folks can get weirded out if little girls's "flash" them.
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#12 of 43 Old 03-23-2005, 06:13 PM
 
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My dd (5) is a panty-free as well. We do have some nice bike-style shorts for when she wears dresses out and about, because she is a big climber. The only time it has come up was when MIL was helping dd get dressed and I hear MIL say "You don't like to wear underwear?!" and dd replies, "Well neither does mommy."
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#13 of 43 Old 03-24-2005, 12:48 PM
 
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a panty free dd here. For her it's a waist issue. She won't wear shorts, pants, jeans, etc. It's been going on for about a year. It all started with wanted her diaper off at night. I tried not to make them too bulky but a diaper for a 3yr at bedtime is kinda hard not to make bulky.
dd mostly wears overalls (long or short depending on weather). For some very quick errands I would let her go out with just a dress on. Recently what has been working is a dance leotard under dresses. I was afraid it would be too complicated for her to go to the bathroom at school but she does very well. I'm trying to buy dresses that can be pulled over the head so she won't need help when she starts K. So many kid dresses **** have zippers/buttons in the back. The last thing I want is a teacher having to unzip her. At her last pre-school she was very vocal to the class about how she hates panties. I talked to her MD and was told as long as we could manage therapy wasn't necessary. I think she might be getting better as she loved trying on a bathing suit at Target that had a grass skirt with it. It was actually too small and she still loved it.

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#14 of 43 Old 03-24-2005, 01:02 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cool_mom
At what age do girls learn to be "ladylike" in a dress or skirt?
Um... sometimes never. :
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#15 of 43 Old 03-24-2005, 02:08 PM
 
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One reason for girls, ladies, women to wear an "under-garment" is that you CAN wash undies in HOT water and dry them in HOT air to kill the bacteria that builds up. Cool water and cool dry (that you would use with, for example, demim pants) DO NOT kill the bacteria, for example, that causes yeast infection (in vagina as well as anus, same meds etc) and can lead to UTIs as well as other things. FYI this holds true for socks too since "Athletes Foot" is pretty much a yeast infection of the foot. Same meds are used, etc. And of course this goes for boys too since they can get the same infections.

Personally, I would also incourage children to use underwear to keep poop-stains and pee-stains from garments. Children are not 100% about wiping from the day they use the toilet... And washing pants in HOT water and air really "takes the life out of them" faster than I can personally afford.
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#16 of 43 Old 03-24-2005, 04:48 PM
 
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If putting them on the right way is an issue, try making a small dot or x on the inside of the waistband in the FRONT with a laudry marker or Sharpie. That way she can see the mark and match it up with her belly button to know which way they go.
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#17 of 43 Old 03-24-2005, 05:41 PM
 
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I didn't start wearing underwear until I was 16. If I wore a skirt, I just had on nylons or tights with no underwear. No problem at all...

But later the crotch of my jeans started to bug me and I wanted to go out without nylons, so I took up the underwear habit.
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#18 of 43 Old 03-24-2005, 09:58 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jillywilson
If putting them on the right way is an issue, try making a small dot or x on the inside of the waistband in the FRONT with a laudry marker or Sharpie. That way she can see the mark and match it up with her belly button to know which way they go.
I put iron ons on DD1's first set of underwear. They were great. And now I sew a button on the front of her underwear. It helps me distinguish the size and owner when sorting laundry now that her sister has started wearing underwear sometimes, and helps her find the front easily. The button doesn't seem to bother her, snd she got to pick the color. (Pink)
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#19 of 43 Old 03-29-2005, 09:42 PM
 
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If we are home, I don't make my girls wear them, but when they go to school, or we have to go out in public then yes, I do make them wear them. My mom always told me the purpose of wearing them is that in case you get in an accident and have to go to the hospital, then no one would see your private parts. I know now that that isn't the exact truth, but hmm...

My daughter are still learning to sit and walk like "Ladies" while wearing skirts and dresses, so I do make them wear them in public. To many perverts out there too.

Christina:~Student mama to Collyn(13), Haylea-Ann (9):, and Natalie (8) , and SO to Jeff.
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#20 of 43 Old 03-29-2005, 09:54 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by raleigh_mom
And now I sew a button on the front of her underwear.
:LOL this made me laugh! when we were kids-if we said *so* my mom would say-'sew buttons on your underwear, zippers are out of style'.
we are 'anti-panti'. i recently heard panties decrease circulation to important lymph glands in the groin. i have commandered some of dh's boxers and those are comfy. when dd out of dipes we are going to use boxers on her too.
~nak~
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#21 of 43 Old 03-30-2005, 03:51 PM
 
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Both DD and I go commando most of the time..She is 11 and has never really liked the feel of undies..she is capable of cleaning herself well and she will wear them if she wears a dress. I hate them...
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#22 of 43 Old 03-30-2005, 04:04 PM
 
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I forfeited undies a few years ago. It didn't matter how I washed them they irritated me a lot and I hated the feeling of them. Doesn't matter if theya re the right size or the wrong size they cut into my sides and left marks in my skin that I wasn't comfortable with. DH loves it!!!! When we met this last summer he about had a heart attack when he felt the lack of undies there. :

I suppose when it comes time to deal with it I'll let my daughter decide for herself. If she feels better without them than so be it.

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#23 of 43 Old 03-30-2005, 04:19 PM
 
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I wouldn't worry too much about perverts as a reason for underwear. If there are perverts around, putting your dd in underwear will not make her safe. It's not like the lack of underwear will make her more unsafe.

As for the hospital, I guess there are some people who leave the hospital all embarrassed about their underwear, but I'm not one of them.
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#24 of 43 Old 03-31-2005, 08:56 PM
 
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i think little girls should wear underwear.. it is just the proper thing to do. one time in was at the park and these two little girls were running around , jumping ...their skirts flying up ........and they had no underwear on! do i , or anyone else need to see their vulvas? no, so put underwear on.. i bet child molesters would love that.


please , put under wear on your daughters.....
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#25 of 43 Old 04-01-2005, 06:16 PM
 
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yes. I think they need something covering their orifices (baby boxers are fine!). My perspective is mainly hygiene. I have a big sheepdog who sheds and wood floors that are always dusty no matter what I do. If my 5 year old dd sat around on the floor naked I shudder to think what we'd find at bathtime. She's not the best at wiping either. Also, I worry about her possibly hurting herself, getting cut by a microscopic shard of glass or a random bead finding its way in there or something. Third, I think the modesty aspect is also important in terms of keeping her safe from unwanted sexual attention. However if she was getting yeast infections from wetness as one pp mentioned, I would be sure to help her stay dry, make plenty of airing time, and have her change panties often.
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#26 of 43 Old 04-05-2005, 04:29 PM
 
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I agree that probably little girls out in public in skirts or dresses need something on underneath (shorts or panties or tights-something), but we don't wear underware much around here, although I just have boys now I wouldn't make a girl wear panties either, I don't.
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#27 of 43 Old 04-05-2005, 04:53 PM
 
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My 3yo dd likes to wear panties under clothes, unless they ride up (usually from being put on backward) She gets upset if I put pants on her without panties.

I have a hard time keeping any clothes on her at all while we're at home. I don't have a problem with nudity, just that she is preoccupied with certain body parts when they aren't covered...and I can tell it makes dh uncomfortable, which makes me uncomfortable. I try to pick out cute panties that she'll want to wear around the house.

I would definitely make her wear them with dresses to prevent flashing. I'm afraid of the pervs. But if she insisted on not wearing them with pants, what can I say? I go commando often and would be a hypocrite to tell her she couldn't!

Quote:
Originally Posted by myrrhmaid
:LOL this made me laugh! when we were kids-if we said *so* my mom would say-'sew buttons on your underwear, zippers are out of style'.
Dh says this to me every time I say "so"...drives me nuts!

"The best things in life aren't things."

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#28 of 43 Old 04-05-2005, 05:08 PM
 
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I guess it depends on how often you wash pants. Unless they fall in the mud my kids get two days wear out of a pair of jeans before they are washed, I do the same thing. If you aren't wearing panties then your pants become your panties. Also, think about NOT donating your used pants to other people or stores if you don't use undies. In dresses I wouldn't make my child wear undies in the house IF the dress was long enough that she didn't have her bare bottom on the furniture, thus making the furniture become her underwear. Girls and women have vaginal secretions. I have kids in my house all of the time, what if they to drop a cracker on on the couch and then pick it up and eat it? It would be really gross if bare vulvas regularlly occupied that surface. We're a nudie family too, lol. But in the evenings when we're hanging out nekkid (as dh calls it) we put beach towels over the seats of the couches.

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#29 of 43 Old 04-05-2005, 05:10 PM
 
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On a side note: My children hardly ever wear underwear to bed, they just wear pjs. The other day my son accidentally zipped his penis up in his sleeper. He now chooses to wear boxers under his pajamas.


-Heather

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#30 of 43 Old 04-05-2005, 05:16 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jannan
i think little girls should wear underwear.. it is just the proper thing to do. one time in was at the park and these two little girls were running around , jumping ...their skirts flying up ........and they had no underwear on! do i , or anyone else need to see their vulvas? no, so put underwear on.. i bet child molesters would love that.


please , put under wear on your daughters.....
NIce friggin comment Janan! Geeze!!!!! Boy oh boy.... you take the cake!
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