sassy three-year-old - Mothering Forums
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#1 of 12 Old 10-05-2006, 04:25 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I don't know if this the right place to put this or if there is a category better suited, but here goes...

My daughter is three and a half. Up until the end of july, she was relatively polite and very sweet and kind. And then something happened. After a weekend that her seven year old cousin spent the night, she got sassy and defiant. Started acting like she was 13: It would seem to have something to do with my niece, but she is very sweet and polite and not defiant. I just don't understand. I thought it would go away quickly but it hasn't. She is driving me nuts:

I had a baby in the middle of august, but this started before that. We give her lots of positive attention (at least i thought so). She argues with everything i ask her to do. Near everthing. The whining... oh, the whining.

I just have no idea why this started or what to do about it. She acts like this for other people too, so it isn't just a parent specific thing (i am not sure whether to be relieved or mortified ) Any ideas, suggestions, anyone else in the same boat.

I fear what she will be like when she is a teenager if she is this sassy at three

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#2 of 12 Old 10-05-2006, 04:45 PM
 
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It's the age. My son is 3, and he and some of my friend's 3 year old have all started on that sassy thing lately. I find it mostly amusing. The whining I can do without.
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#3 of 12 Old 10-05-2006, 07:40 PM
 
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We've experienced this with our now six-year-old, only it didn't suddenly happen overnight -- she's always been spirited. I recommend "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk" by Adelle Faber and Elaine Maslisch (sp?).

Susan -- married unschoolin' WAHMomma to two lovely girls (born 2000 and 2005).
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#4 of 12 Old 10-05-2006, 08:49 PM
 
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I think its the age ????????
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#5 of 12 Old 10-06-2006, 03:46 AM
 
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the how to talk is a great book and i will also add louise aimes' your 3 year old. it will give u a great idea of what a 3 year old is like. so u know its an age thing and not just coz of the new baby.

man i have one sassy child who doesnt just use her mouth but her whole body for her sassy talk. i do point out her tone of voice and help her friends talk to her in a nice polite way to tell her they dont like the way she talks to them when they come and complain to me. at 3 1/2 i woudl tell them with guidance they need to take care of their battle with them .and it usually worked out well since my dd really didnt realise the effect she was having on others.

i didnt stop her sassy talk with me. she could give me as much sass as she liked. so she can get it out of her system on somebody.

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#6 of 12 Old 10-06-2006, 09:44 AM
 
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i think it is the age, and you need to have a line. I let a lot of things go but I try to address it when it goes too far for me. This kind of draws a line for them as to how far they can take it. Sassy is ok, and can turn silly with adult participation. I try to make it funny, join in, and make it a game. However, when Im being addressed very rudely with sass, I will often address the tone of voice and she will not get whatever it is she wants from me until it changes. NOt always, but often times I address it. I really to try to let a lot of it go, though, to not make an issue of it... its a delicate and fine line. If you say too much about it, it can can worse.... and likewise sometimes if you say nothing at all.
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#7 of 12 Old 10-06-2006, 03:05 PM
 
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Thank you thank you for posting this. I am having the same issues. My 3 + year old DD is so whinny and everything I do she doesn't stop. Sometimes I feel like it must be me! I have a new one too....7 months and DD has gone through spurts of this but it can't be the baby now...can it? Ugh. Its just good to know that others are going through it too. I feel bad because she is driving me crazy!
hope it gets better....
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#8 of 12 Old 10-06-2006, 06:25 PM
 
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It's the age :
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#9 of 12 Old 10-07-2006, 01:16 AM - Thread Starter
 
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I am so glad it isn't just me. I think i'll go the library to check out those books... somethings gotta give

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#10 of 12 Old 10-07-2006, 10:19 AM
 
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Yup definately the age! :
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#11 of 12 Old 10-07-2006, 02:33 PM
 
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pssst. a word of warning erin. the 4's are not that much better either. for us for my dd's 3 year age was like the tweens. and 4 is totally into teenage years the first time. it is fun and a lot frustrating too. mine and a few others started the 4's with a lot of emotional issues. but after they got over htat they matured a huge bunch and are more enjoyable than hard. but its all about breaking rules. and trying to talk themselves out of the situation.

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#12 of 12 Old 10-07-2006, 07:41 PM
 
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I'm so glad to hear it's not just my dd! I keep telling everyone she's 3 going on 13. I hear they grow out of it?:
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