Constipation/pooping woes w/potty learning aged children - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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Old 10-20-2006, 08:08 PM
 
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We have an appointment on Wednesday. I am going to ask for a prescription of what you guys are reccomending, the mirilax. But for now there is NO WAY he will let me near his butt for an enema. He would kick and fight and end up hurting us or him. I had to use the Ex lax because this kid will spit out all liquid meds on me and I had to find a chewable. The exlax is chocolate and chewable, and it said ok for 6 year olds.

I know there are alternatives, but at the moment that's what I have to do. I can not get him to take any liquid meds, he always tastes them when I mix it in with stuff and is suspicious of any drinks I give him now. He's onto my tricks. I'm so frustrated at this point.
right there with ya corrie! exact same deal here. I'm pretty confident he won't taste the glycolax! it is extraordinarily frustrating!! I have to sneak to get it in ds's first drink of the day. if he even sees the white bottle, I get "WHAT IS THAT?? THAT'S NOT FOR MY BOTTOM IS IT??" noooo, no, honey, this is for mommy. go watch tv. shoo! then I whisk it in it dissolves great in ginger ale, btw :

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Old 10-20-2006, 10:15 PM - Thread Starter
 
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ok-a good day today-pooped for a second day in a row, she didn't try to hold it, nor did she cry!
now I hope we can build on that, because unfortunately days like this have been few and far between lately. Dh was commenting on her sunny mood today, too. Poor kid-it must feel awful when it's bad.

Yesterday I started giving her carob/peanut clusters-to see if carob has the same impact on her as it does on me. She definitely doesn't mind having a couple of those a day.
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Old 10-21-2006, 09:01 AM
 
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Well the situation has gone from bad to worse. I hass been 6 days with no movement. He had two child doses of ex lax yesterday as well as a glycerin suppository with no results. We are going to have to go to the doctor today because he was up half the night moaning and groaning. He just can not pass whatever is blocking him up. We spent over 7 hours yesterday trying to deal with this.

2 warm baths, talking him into the suppository and tons of time sitting on the potty. I'm just so frustrated. It's not getting like this again.

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Old 10-21-2006, 10:00 AM
 
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You know what has been helping ds poop? Dr Praeggers Spinach Pancakes. In the frozen section. They can either be found in the Kosher frozen foods or in the Natural foods area.

My ds finally pooped yesterday. He still has more though...his tummy is a bit hard. Poor kid.
I'll give him more Glycolax today.
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Old 10-21-2006, 10:36 AM
 
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MamanMusique, it's good to hear a success story! I would also like to hear more about this supplement. did you go through a period where you had to use miralax too, or some other laxative? if so, how did you make the transition?
nak and tendonitis...

We did see a gastroenterologist when ds was about 18mo. That was a useless and frustrating appointment. We reluctantly put ds on Miralax and he did not do well at all. His skin began looking grayish and he was not healthy on it. Did not help the poop issue anyway.

The naturopath put us on a hypoallergenic diet which we stayed on for 2 years. That did not have an effect on pooping but we felt good on it so continued. She prescribed liquid cal/mag (and probiotics) which I believe was a turning point for us. DS never had hard stools but did have build up and a stretched colon from withholding. Things just were not moving thru. The cal/mag helped move things thru more regularly. Still the emotional part dragged on. Finally when he was 4.5 and decided to poop in a toilet he immediately stopped withholding. The position was what did it for him. We had always tried to get him to squat (with diaper) while pooping but he refused. He insisted on standing with his legs together and trying to hold it. Not a good poop position. This of course perpetuated the problem. The minute he went on the toilet he saw how easy poop could come out. Never did have a problem after that. After 3 years of torture it went away that easily and he is now 5.5 and fine.

We never wanted to push him to toilet train and did not even try as we were always told it could lead to withholding and we honestly did not care where he pooped we just wanted him to poop. We were kind of between a rock and a hard place, looking back on it. If we tried to have him use the toilet he might withhold even more yet the positioning is what did it. All it took was one time. Also, he went right to a regular toilet with an insert (his choice)

That is the story to the best of my memory - I may have blocked a lot of it out. It was a horrible experience

Good luck mamas
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Old 10-21-2006, 11:42 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Well the situation has gone from bad to worse. I hass been 6 days with no movement. He had two child doses of ex lax yesterday as well as a glycerin suppository with no results. We are going to have to go to the doctor today because he was up half the night moaning and groaning. He just can not pass whatever is blocking him up. We spent over 7 hours yesterday trying to deal with this.

2 warm baths, talking him into the suppository and tons of time sitting on the potty. I'm just so frustrated. It's not getting like this again.

I'm sorry, corrie43-good luck today.
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Old 10-21-2006, 05:26 PM
 
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Well one xray and rectal exam later we are home. He has a ton of poop in his colon but luckily not impacted yet, but the doctor said if he doesn't go within the next 24 hours he could get that way. He gave us a prescription for miralax which thankfully has no taste. So hoping for the best.

The biggest problem is now he screams bloody murder as soon as we sit him on the potty. He just won't go and is holding it back. No matter how much we talk to him about it. This is an almost 6 year old who has been pooping fine almost his whole life. What the heck?? You would think he has had a traumatic experience on the potty or something but he hasn't.

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Old 10-23-2006, 12:06 AM
 
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corrie! it will take 2-3 days on the miralax, but it will work! I remember ds figuring out how to expel the suppository without anything else (sorry, TMI!) now that's control!

you *would* think something traumatic had happened. I mean, really, what makes a kid decide to quit pooping forever because of a diaper rash?? other kids didn't do this. most kids will have a painful rash at least once eventually. what makes one kid decide to retain? it's sooo frustrating.

maman musique, I am hopeful that by the time ds is 4.5 he'll have that light bulb go on too. that's only 7 months away! : he also does the "stand and squeeze" thing-- I think that happens a lot-- but in our case we *have* tried to get him to use the potty, and he did have one day not too long ago when he went all day to the potty to poop. but I guess he just hasn't put it all together yet. I have worried that we shouldn't have "introduced" the potty, or that we did it too early, etc. but his pee training was instantaneous and was prompted by seeing a friend pee in the potty, so that was all his own doing. some days we go through ten pairs of underwear because he's trying not to poop and lets it out little by little. those are the worst. I keep thinking, one day he'll be five, one day he'll be five, hoping that the developmental changes that come with age will help him figure it out and quit fighting it.

may we all get there soon, and with much mirth and merriment and no additional issues to deal with after this one goes away! :

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Old 10-23-2006, 11:49 AM - Thread Starter
 
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day 3 today-so in writing it down I'm seeing her pattern. this morning she's crying, doing laps around the kitchen island and holding it in. On Saturday she asked to wear undies and has been dry since then, but this morning when she had to go poo I put her on the potty and she freaked and I put a diaper back on because of course she was upset she would go in her panties. Talking, talking, talking to her-she just wanted me to hold her for about half an hour, poor babe. I'm seriously thinking of taking her out of her preschool class just so she can completely get back in touch with her body's rhythmn. She only goes four hours a week, but I know she wouldn't go in the potty there, and she would try not to go in her diaper-just another reason for her to do more holding in.
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Old 10-23-2006, 03:10 PM
 
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I'm so glad for this thread. We really hit a low point this weekend. My husband was out of town for a funeral and on Day 4 (Saturday) things had totally fallen apart: the laps around the house, high-stepping, not eating, whining, throwing, biting, hitting--the works. I became way too emotional invested in his poop and so I was getting frustrated too. The breaking point was when I got a soccer ball to the face--I gave myself a time-out and went in a different room to cry. Really cry. My son came in with a worried face every so often, and at one point I heard him tell the baby (who was safely strapped in a high chair) that "Mama can't come in here right now, because she's being too loud."

So he didn't poop that day, and on Sunday I woke up with a new outlook: I couldn't change his reaction to his poop, but I could change mine. I planned some fun stuff out of the house (he rarely has the drama in public) and when it started again I was mentally prepared. He finally pooped on Day 5.

Wow, this is like free therapy!
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Old 10-23-2006, 03:18 PM - Thread Starter
 
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P-Chan- I'm glad you got an emotional release, and what a great realization. I think I've been in denial about how much of a toll this can take-it really is so stressful dealing with the behaviors and something constantly not being "right." Thank you for mentioning the high stepping-dd does that too-now I fully understand what's going on. It's a bit freeing to move from that place of "it really can't be that serious, can it?" to realizing something does need to be done.
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Old 10-23-2006, 03:57 PM
 
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This is a great thread - so helpful to know that other parents are out there dealing with the same issues.

As PP noted - my son also learned to expell the suppository and nothing else. Our GI doc actually recommended against the glycerin suppositories becuase he felt that they are very uncomfortable physically and don't accomplish much.

DS has been taking Mirlax a long time and has finally stopped withholding (its been months and months since the last time). He will only poo in a diaper, but I guess that isn't too abnormal at 3 years of age.
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Old 10-23-2006, 04:17 PM - Thread Starter
 
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As PP noted - my son also learned to expell the suppository and nothing else. Our GI doc actually recommended against the glycerin suppositories becuase he felt that they are very uncomfortable physically and don't accomplish much.
I was going to ask about suppositories. I had gotten some on the advice of the extended care doctor when I took dd in to check for strep, but I didn't end up using them. I was debating yesterday whether I should use them if she didn't go soon, but I definitely won't use them now.
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Old 10-23-2006, 04:43 PM
 
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We dealt with this too, from when dd was about 12-20 months or so (not severe the whole time, but definite regular episodes....) We tried lots of things, and ended up with Miralax too, not all the time, but I would use it for a week or so when she was withholding. She also wasn't a big fan of juice, so I just mixed it with water, and she'd drink it during the day (never all at once)--it made dosing tricky, since I was never sure how much I could actually count on her drinking. This was all before potty learning, and I was home with her at the time--I so feel for you all who have dc using (or not using) the potty, and being at school--it's so hard to have life revolve around a child's pooping habits!

But I just wanted to write that there is hope--my daughter has been a regular pooper for the past year or so (in the potty and everything), though sometimes they're painful, she just wants to hold my hand then..
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Old 10-23-2006, 04:55 PM
 
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I was going to ask about suppositories. I had gotten some on the advice of the extended care doctor when I took dd in to check for strep, but I didn't end up using them. I was debating yesterday whether I should use them if she didn't go soon, but I definitely won't use them now.
Well, they worked when he was little (like 12 months). Frankly, if I have to stick something in his bottom (which he HATES and so is only done under the most extreme circumstances - like no poop for a week) then my preference is for an enema because 1) it works very fast 2) it makes the poo really soft 3) it is about as natural as you can get (water + magnesium salts). I would say his hatred of both is about equal and that the enema is actually a little easier to use. If you haven't used an enema for your child before I strongly suggest that everyone stay in the bathroom until pooping is finished!
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Old 10-23-2006, 06:07 PM
 
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P-chan - I totally understand what you mean about being too emotionally invested in the pooping. Last week when she finally pooped after five days of not pooping I literally was able to begin and complete several other tasks that I'd put on hold, including cooking dinner. There was no good reason for me to not be cooking. But I couldn't focus enough to even think of what to make. Her not pooping wasn't stopping me from cooking, but somehow it was. I realized I was fragmented emotionally and had too much invested in DD1 that it was keeping me from devoting myself to other matters.

Two weeks ago I really chastised her for leaking into her pants in the fabric store. Whenever she does that she just takes her pants and panties down to check. She came up to me with poop all over her hand and wrist and her pants around her waist. This is a 4.5 year old in public with a poop covered hand and and naked booty!! I was mortified. I shamed her all the way out of the store and all the way home. I felt horrible about it and apologized to her later.

We've had about three days of her going every day. It's nice. I'm still hoping this was just a phase and we won't have to resort to medicine or other extreme measures. It came on so suddenly. I just hope it goes away suddenly too.
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Old 10-24-2006, 03:19 PM
 
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aprildawn! sometimes we really get the difference in their perspective as compared to ours thrown in our faces, don't we?

I did have the suppositories work a couple of times, but they terrify ds, and now that's he's older he has told me why. the last time I used one after one of his weeklong retaining adventures, he ran around the house screaming on tiptoe, "it buhns! it buhns!!" (it burns!) so we definitely don't use them anymore.

p-chan, I sooo hear you! I don't know how my ds has such good aim for the bridge of my nose mommy is the only one who ever gets timeouts at our house!

I am really grateful for this thread too! it *is* like free therapy!

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Old 10-25-2006, 02:48 AM
 
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Hi there,
I'm signing up for this thread - ds1 is 2.75, so a little younger than some of yours, but we are suffering from all the same drama that everyone else has described.

Today he finally did the big poop after 4 days of holding it. We gave him a suppository last night and he managed to expel it with only a little poop. So the "poop labor" started immediately after he got up at 8 am and absolutely nothing else happened in our house except all the drama until 1 pm. I struggle so hard with not getting angry at him. I always start off wanting to be supportive because the poor little guy is so miserable, but my sympathy wanes after 2 days of horrible behavior and hours on hours of him whining for me or dh to sit in a particular spot every 10 minutes so he can hang on us while he fights off the urge. I'm dreading that this is going to go on for years or that he is going to damage his colon. Potty training is a big joke - right now I'd be happy if he would just poop, forget about sitting on the potty to do it.

I'm glad to hear I don't have the only child around dealing with this issue.

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Old 10-25-2006, 07:34 PM
 
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Also, has anyone tried maltsupex for their dc? My ped recommended it, apparently it's an OTC stool softener for kids.

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Old 10-25-2006, 07:43 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hi VBMama-I haven't heard of maltsupex. DD saw the doctor this morning and she's putting her on Miralax for a month.
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Old 10-25-2006, 11:14 PM
 
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Glad I found you guys.

My oldest will be 5 in December. My DH and I are at our wits end. He has been peeing just fine since around 2ish. He has never pooped in the toliet regurarly. He will hide, go upstairs, stand behind the couch. Normally will pee his pants then poop his pants. His dad and I are : : . We have tried everything to get him to use the toliet. Talking, questioning, sitting with him, giving treats, taking privledges away, ignoring....you name we've done it.

As far as I can tell he is not constipated per se. His poop is not 'hard' and he doesn't strain to go. He just doesn't go in the toliet.

Any, any, any ,any words of wisdom and help, please!!
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Old 10-26-2006, 03:31 PM
 
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aprildawn and adtake: I don't have any words of wisdom for you and hope that things get better soon.

VBMama, it sounds like our sons go about pooping in very similar ways. "Poop labor" is a great phrase! I have coined the word "poogasm" for the moment that the poop finally comes (for the record, I don't use that word in front of my son).

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Old 10-26-2006, 05:21 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I have one thing to say about Miralax-holy mother of poop!!!!!

I'm running out of diapers!
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Old 10-27-2006, 12:56 AM
 
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... signing in as as part of the pooping tribe ....

We've done naturopath, elimination diet, osteopath, laxatives, rewards, explaining the reasons why it's not healthy to hold it in with no luck.

Things that have worked for us so far:

- trying to empower DD, tell her SHE is in charge of pooping, no one else, and that I'm not going to coach/cajole/nag her about it anymore

- not talking about poop unless she brings it up

- "brainwashing" suggestions to her as she sleeps : (only to maintain the healthy rhythm, not to initiate pooping while withholding)

- treats, but not overdoing praise (that backfired on us)

- "treatment plan" of laxative after 1 day without pooping (I've found even skipping one day will throw her right off).

We've found once DD starts pooping regularly, it's really easy for her to lapse back into withholding --- it's such a delicate balance.

Our recent successes have been related, I believe, to me trying to lose my emotional investment, and adopt an attitude of "You're in charge. You'll decide when you need to go." After a couple of months of that, I think she started to trust me that I wasn't going to pressure her & 'coach' her on the toilet, and she relaxed some more. When she finally went, I'd give her the treat, but not really praise her.

I never knew s**t could make me so happy!!!
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Old 10-27-2006, 01:05 AM
 
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Anyone else have a pooping calendar?

I have recorded *ALL* of DD's poops & various medications & dosages every day for the last 13 months!

I swear this experience is making me even more ANAL! :
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Old 10-27-2006, 08:38 PM
 
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I posted something about my ds anal retention last year around this time. He started holding his bms when I tried to toilet train him. He is only getting over it now. So I am going to try to train him again. I am going to use flax seed oil - my pedi recommended it. I'll put in his cheese sandwichs. I'llet you know how it works.
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Old 11-01-2006, 12:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I have a Miralax related question. DD had been taking it for about 4 days and (sorry about the tmi) everything became extremely watery. The doctor told me to give it to her every other day instead of every day, which we just started doing. She still had a very watery bm this morning after not going yesterday. Does Miralax typically bring that on?
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Old 11-01-2006, 05:49 PM
 
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Miralax can make poo very watery. We have sometimes cut the daily dose in half or less at times as needed. I've never skipped days. If you are giving her the full dose (17 g, a capfull) that is enough for an adult - so you can imagine that on the relatively smaller system of a kid things can get really watery.
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Old 11-01-2006, 11:00 PM - Thread Starter
 
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If you are giving her the full dose (17 g, a capfull) that is enough for an adult...

yikes-that is what she was prescribed. Although she ends up only finishing half, so...
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Old 11-02-2006, 01:06 AM
 
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My son takes a full capfull - which is about 4 - 4.5 tsp. Knowing that it is pretty easy to use a teaspoon and measure out a lesser amount consistently (or if you decide to taper down the dose over time).
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