Need some ideas for changing 3 YO bedtime routine - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 5 Old 10-24-2006, 12:39 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Help. I really need to transition my 3 1/2 YO's bedtime routine from being completely mommy-centered to accepting either mommy or daddy. UP till now we've always honored her insistance that only mommy can do bedtime (reading, cuddling to sleep). Up until about 6 months ago she also nursed, so it HAD to be me. But now my son is getting increasingly frustrated with the fact that he gets few "mommy nights" because DD gets me first. And he's right, its really not fair to him anymore. He's been really good about accepting her need of me up until now, but he's asking more and more why he has to take second place.

So, now what do I do? Tonight is the second time we've insisted that it be a "daddy night" with DD. She is sobbing in her bed and DH is practically holding her down to keep her from running to me screaming. There has got to be a gentler way, for everyone. But left to her own devices she will never pick him over me. And I can't leave for the evening or DS won't get to sleep on time (and that's important for school). How do I balance all of this? And what do I do to make it work.
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#2 of 5 Old 10-24-2006, 12:52 AM
 
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Can you put them both to bed at the same time? In the saem bed? Maybe move them when they fall asleep?
My DD will accept daddy reading to her but mommy has to be ther for the falling part so if I am putting the baby to sleep she comes in and lays down in the bed in there and if she falls a sleep DH moves her to our bed where she stys untl she comes back in there in the AM to finsh sleeping with me

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#3 of 5 Old 10-24-2006, 03:07 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hipumpkins View Post
Can you put them both to bed at the same time? In the saem bed? Maybe move them when they fall asleep?
Unfortunately the logistics don't work. DD sleeps in a twin and there is barely enough room for she and I to lay down (I'm, um, round). DS sleeps in a double loft, so no way to get DD down once asleep and no way to get DS up if he fell asleep elsewhere. And he really wants time as the center of my attention, and the only time that really happens on a daily basis is at bedtime.
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#4 of 5 Old 10-24-2006, 03:39 PM
 
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Could you sit down as a family and make some sort of chart where you and DH take turns with the bedtime routine?
DH and I take turns (approx every other night) and switch it up.
If DD has some say in the routine changes she may accept it easier.
Good luck.
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#5 of 5 Old 10-24-2006, 03:59 PM
 
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I don't yet have two kiddos - but my son was very Mommy-centric for bedtime. I started "going to the gym" or "going to the store" shortly before bedtime (either actually going out, or going in the study and 'hiding" to work on stuff). He was quite accepting of Daddy for bedtime when I wasn't available and it made the transition pretty easy for us.
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