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#91 of 102 Old 12-25-2006, 10:51 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mommy68 View Post
If a child is picky then they're picky. You just go with the flow until they are old enough to realize they'll eat what you are eating and sometimes that's not until they are school age and are around their peers who eat normally. That's what it took for my two oldest DS.
Yep. My oldest son is eleven and a half. He has always been very particular about food. He is very sensitive to the texture and look of things. We tried all the theories out there and finally just decided it wasn't worth the fight. The whole pick you battle idea. It took a good couple of years, but he has started asking here and there for different things. He actually asking to try things on his own and finding he like a few more things. I figure, in time, he will expand his food choices even more.

Rebecca wife of Megan...moms to six crazy kiddos! Seth (15), Madison (13), Zachary (12), Trevor (12), Alex (10), and Nicholas (9)
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#92 of 102 Old 12-26-2006, 02:07 PM
 
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The idea that all you have to do is offer and eat a variety and the child will eat anything they are given is not always the case.

Interesting thing about my kids is their food choices are just as varied as their personalities are.
Yes, I do realize that kids will have different tastes. I'm talking about the kids who will eat only a handful of items. Or kids that say they don't like an ENTIRE cuisine such as Indian, or Tex-Mex, or Chinese. I mean, the kids in those parts of the world eat that food every day and manage to find something they like. I'm just not convinced that if you give your child plenty of variety from around the world, that they cannot find many items that are both texturally pleasing and tasty to them. Flame me if you want, but if kids are given enough variety, they'll find SOMETHING healthy that they like that goes beyond nuggets and pizza. I'm thoroughly convinced of that as I've lived and traveled extensively around the world and I just don't see the pickiness elsewhere that I hear so much about in the US. There are plenty of kids in the world that never eat American food and THEY manage to find food they like to eat.

FTR... I was an extremely picky eater as a child. My parents catered to my desire to eat only grilled cheese and hot dogs. When I finally went off to school at the age of 17, I ate rice for the first time!! I am now an adventurous eater that will try anything and like most of what I eat. I just had to have the exposure to it.
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#93 of 102 Old 12-26-2006, 04:00 PM
 
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Originally Posted by sunnmama View Post

We pretty much don't even pay attention to what dd eats at a meal. I put out the food, and she is free to take and eat what she wants. She is also allowed free access of all the other healthy food in the house. We don't (usually) keep "junk" food in the house, so healthy food is really the only option. When she was smaller, she would often try to persuade me to get her something else--and I would do so, but only after I'd eaten my fill of the food on the table. She was always free to go in the fridge on her own.
That's pretty much us

DS "made" it to 19yo and 5'11" somehow
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#94 of 102 Old 12-26-2006, 04:30 PM
 
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My DD is five and pretty much refuses to eat anything but oatmeal and hummus. It gets really old when every night after seeing what I made for dinner she says,"Gross, I am not goint to eat that!"
Sometimes I get realy motivated and I make a new recipe for dinner,,my DD will come in and complain. SHe says it's gross before she even tries it. Half the time after she tries it she ends up liking it.
I am getting really sick of making two dinners every night...ahh.

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#95 of 102 Old 01-02-2007, 12:54 AM
 
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Originally Posted by velochic View Post
Yes, I do realize that kids will have different tastes. I'm talking about the kids who will eat only a handful of items. Or kids that say they don't like an ENTIRE cuisine such as Indian, or Tex-Mex, or Chinese. I mean, the kids in those parts of the world eat that food every day and manage to find something they like. I'm just not convinced that if you give your child plenty of variety from around the world, that they cannot find many items that are both texturally pleasing and tasty to them. Flame me if you want, but if kids are given enough variety, they'll find SOMETHING healthy that they like that goes beyond nuggets and pizza. I'm thoroughly convinced of that as I've lived and traveled extensively around the world and I just don't see the pickiness elsewhere that I hear so much about in the US. There are plenty of kids in the world that never eat American food and THEY manage to find food they like to eat.

FTR... I was an extremely picky eater as a child. My parents catered to my desire to eat only grilled cheese and hot dogs. When I finally went off to school at the age of 17, I ate rice for the first time!! I am now an adventurous eater that will try anything and like most of what I eat. I just had to have the exposure to it.

No flames.....I just disagree completely with you. My oldest son is exposed to many, many different types of food. The same foods his siblings are exposed to each day. He is very, very particular about his food. He has a very small variety of foods he will and it isn't due to lack of variety being offered.

My youngest son is much the same. My middle son is a bit more adventurous and willing to try other things. My daughter is very adventurous and will typically try anything offered to her.

They have all been offered the same foods, but they have completely different ideas on food.

Interestingly enough, I traveled all through childhood and was not at all adventurous with food. I was made to taste several different foods when we lived overseas and I wonder if that was what turned me off of food trying. I did not become adventurous with food until I was in my late twenties.

Rebecca wife of Megan...moms to six crazy kiddos! Seth (15), Madison (13), Zachary (12), Trevor (12), Alex (10), and Nicholas (9)
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#96 of 102 Old 01-02-2007, 02:48 AM
 
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This is a very interesting thread.

My son, who is almost four, ate almost nonstop when he first started on solids. He had one or two things that he just didn't like, but everything else was fair game. It wasn't until he was a little over two, I think, that he started to become picky. He wanted hamburgers, chicken nuggets, and spaghetti. Nothing else.

I tried all sorts of things to help him eat healthier. He did have hamburgers and nuggets on a fairly regular basis, but it was all homemade from lean meat. I got a chicken nugget recipe from an MDC mama, and I actually made it tonight. I cut chicken into bite-sized pieces, brush them with olive oil, dredge them in breadcrumbs and seasonings, then bake for about 20 minutes. The kids love them.

For a while I would let him substitute another meal if he didn't like what I was serving, but since he usually didn't decide that he didn't want something until AFTER I had started eating, it became very frustrating. We usually eat with my ILs and my MIL would often get up to make him a PB&J, but we put our foot down recently about the seperate meals. It's so frustrating to me. I recently got advice from a friend on another board that I have been using, and it works GREAT.

When I make a meal, I will do one of two things:

(1) Put the meal on DS's plate and let him eat whatever he wants. I am very clear that if he doesn't want something, he can leave it on his plate. He is not allowed to throw it on the floor, dump it on the table, or insult the cooking in any way (e.g. "that's yucky!" must be replaced with "I don't want/like that"). Those rules went over surprisingly well. He called something yucky last night and I reminded him that it is hurtful to hear things like that. He immediately apologized and said "I don't want that" instead.

(2) Slightly adapt a meal that I already know he doesn't like. I make chicken with fresh parsley, carrots, roasted almonds, and couscous on a fairly regular basis. It's one of my favorite meals because it's so easy and yummy. DS does not like it at all. He doesn't like the way the chicken is seasoned, he (like his Daddy) can't stand cooked carrots, and he doesn't like couscous. So when I make this meal, I cut raw carrots into thin circles and he gets "carrot pennies" and unseasoned chicken. Sometimes I will lightly sprinkle breadcrumbs on the chicken before cooking so they slightly resemble chicken nuggets, but also look like what everyone else is eating.

Besides this, I introduce new meals - or old meals cooked/displayed in different ways - as often as possible, so he is able to try new things before getting stuck in a food rut and always wanting the same thing.

I have realized lately that he does eat enough to sustain himself healthily. Tonight I made chicken nuggets for the kids and unbreaded chicken for the adults, and we all got brown rice and broccoli. DS ate a ton of chicken and nothing else. Last week, I had steak, mashed potatoes, and broccoli. He had four adult-sized servings of broccoli and 1 1/2 steaks. The other night, the little boy who used to ask for nothing but chicken nuggets and hamburgers was BEGGING (!!!) for a carrot stick.

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#97 of 102 Old 01-02-2007, 02:48 AM
 
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I didn't read all the great posts, thought I would just suggest what worked great for us. And we have narrow margins bc of food allergies...:

Went to the library and brought home as many of the kids cookbooks they would let me at one time, used three sep. cards: : And just laid them out on the table, said nothing. (Granted they were all mainstream, wholesome whole foods/vegetarian choices) Huge variety, including a cool appetizer book. Slowly they started thumbing through them, "Hey mom, look at this, can you make this?" "Oh I don't know son, why don't you right it down and we can talk about it at morning circle." You can see where this is leading... they now create the shopping list and plan all the meals. We have a designated soux chef for every meal, who gets to set the table, light the candles and write the placecards, wow! We've hunted up several seasonal table dec. mats and napkins and waldorfy little elves that leave messages AND Miss Manners a little dolly who is great about leaving mess. for rude table mates. We have a bfast rotation, 15 lunch suggestions, and a binder full of supper ideas, they love the crockpot. BTW their fav. cookbooks are about appetizers. We call it party tray. Works good with leftovers too. Two bites is five diff. things for each. And we're all about the dipping sauce. Two choices for dinner here too like a pp mentioned. Do always stock fruit, yogurt, quick snacks and homemade soups and stuf... But when 8pm rolls around, "the kitchen's closed." I do think sometimes they are surviving on fresh air and a multi. vit. Then all of a sudden they try something new! "Who is this imposter, and what have you done with my son?" JK So there you go, just keep on keeping on... : Long post, but its food, right mamas?
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#98 of 102 Old 01-02-2007, 12:51 PM
 
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Originally Posted by mamablueberry View Post
My DD is five and pretty much refuses to eat anything but oatmeal and hummus. It gets really old when every night after seeing what I made for dinner she says,"Gross, I am not goint to eat that!"
Sometimes I get realy motivated and I make a new recipe for dinner,,my DD will come in and complain. SHe says it's gross before she even tries it. Half the time after she tries it she ends up liking it.
I am getting really sick of making two dinners every night...ahh.
And you shouldn't have to, barring an illness or food allergy. She needs to know that it is highly rude to comment like that about food you have made.
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#99 of 102 Old 01-02-2007, 01:49 PM
 
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And you shouldn't have to, barring an illness or food allergy. She needs to know that it is highly rude to comment like that about food you have made.
Curious as to what you would expect her to say if she doesn't like a food? I agree it can get old hearing someone say they think something is gross, but how else should they describe it.

My crew will say they think something looks gross or they don't like it when they haven't ever had the food. We let them know they can't say they don't like it as they have never tried the food before. As far as the gross comment goes, it's what their opinion is. They are welcome to state their opinion once and we move on.

Rebecca wife of Megan...moms to six crazy kiddos! Seth (15), Madison (13), Zachary (12), Trevor (12), Alex (10), and Nicholas (9)
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#100 of 102 Old 01-02-2007, 03:04 PM
 
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Originally Posted by Houdini View Post
Curious as to what you would expect her to say if she doesn't like a food? I agree it can get old hearing someone say they think something is gross, but how else should they describe it.
What about "I don't like it?"

I try to use (and promote a use of) non-judgemental statements.

"It's gross", "she is ugly", "that's stupid" can be replaced by "I" statements, describing how "I" see it.

What's gross for one is delicious to another.
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#101 of 102 Old 01-02-2007, 03:07 PM
 
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Originally Posted by irinam View Post
What about "I don't like it?"

I try to use (and promote a use of) non-judgemental statements.

"It's gross", "she is ugly", "that's stupid" can be replaced by "I" statements, describing how "I" see it.

What's gross for one is delicious to another.
OK. My crew use that one as well. When my crew use it's gross, I usually have them change it to "I think that is gross." I agree what's gross for one isn't for another.

I don't see the point of not allowing a child to have an opinion on what they like/dislike or will eat/not eat.

Rebecca wife of Megan...moms to six crazy kiddos! Seth (15), Madison (13), Zachary (12), Trevor (12), Alex (10), and Nicholas (9)
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#102 of 102 Old 01-02-2007, 03:11 PM
 
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I don't see the point of not allowing a child to have an opinion on what they like/dislike or will eat/not eat.
ITA. I don't event think it's possible not to allow an opinion They migh learn not to express it, but it'd still be there in their minds.
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