Anyone have a 6-8 year spacing between two siblings, and love it? - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

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#31 of 41 Old 01-12-2007, 02:49 PM
 
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My boys are 7 years, 4 months apart. They have so much fun together! My 8 yo loves to help with his baby brother. The 17 mo's eyes light up when big bro comes into the room. They have such a special bond already. It's also neat that my 8 yo will remember the birth of his little brother. That is something very special. I would do it again this way in a heartbeat. My 8 yo had all kinds of one-on-one from me for 7 years. Now the younger guy will have all kinds of one-on-one time from me as well, while older bro's at school. The best of both worlds, I think.

My younger brother and I are 10 years apart, and even though we're at very different places in our lives (he's a senior in high school) we have an amazing bond.

Molly, mama to my 3 sweet boys.
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#32 of 41 Old 01-12-2007, 02:55 PM
 
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My #2 and #3 are 7 years apart and it's good. My DD is 9 years older then #3 and is now at a point where I can let her babysit (toddler is napping and we're usually back before he wakes up, plus my dad is here in case of emergency)...I like it. The older kids adore the younger ones, the only problems are when the babies get into toys they shouldn't be into.

Amy ~ Web Designing Single Mom to 4: DD14, DS12, DS5, DS3
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#33 of 41 Old 01-12-2007, 03:10 PM
 
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My oldest two are 8 years apart, and my youngest two will be 4 years apart. Sometimes I wonder what the heck we were thinking, since we will have devoted 30 years of our lives (at least!) to having kids in the house! But...most of the time I think it's great.
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#34 of 41 Old 03-20-2007, 10:28 PM
 
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Originally Posted by woobysma View Post
(he's even been known to help DS2 on the potty in the morning when they wake before us - now THAT'S love )
That is just soooo sweet!
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#35 of 41 Old 03-20-2007, 11:38 PM
 
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Mine are 15 12 and 3 . Its a blast they love him ( well most of the time) they were both in the room when he was born. I will say my 3 yr old is a little rough because of playing with the big boys. He thinks all balls are footballs

My sister and I are 7yr apart and we have the BEST relationship she was my "doll" growing up. I remember cloth diapering her w/ pins! I also think I was the one who potty trained her LOL.

Jeana Christian momma to 4 sons Logan 18, Connor 15, Nathan 6, and bonus baby Jack 1
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#36 of 41 Old 03-21-2007, 12:14 AM
 
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I will say my 3 yr old is a little rough because of playing with the big boys. He thinks all balls are footballs
That is a side effect, I think. DS2 probably would have been a "rough and tumble" sort anyway, but I think it's magnified by having a BIG brother
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#37 of 41 Old 03-22-2007, 04:59 PM
 
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I see that most of you have had fairly good results with the age spacing. Unfortunately, I haven't. My children are 5.5 years apart: dd 8.5 and ds 3. My dd is and always has been a tomboy which I thought would be good since she has a younger brother. But we have nothing but trouble with her getting along with her brother. She says she doesn't like him, she's not part of the family, nobody likes her, etc. I know a lot of it is jealousy as she was the only baby for 5.5 years and now she has to share the attentions with her brother. We are also a blended family, my dd has a different father than ds and I am married to ds dad so I think that is part of the issues also. DS on the other hand LOVES his sister and wants to play with her and that just annoys her more. I hope dd will come to realize her brother is OK; we are working on it.

Other than the sibling issues; I wouldn't be able to handle two in diapers, I don't think so that was a plus!

BB,
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#38 of 41 Old 03-22-2007, 05:56 PM
 
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I see that most of you have had fairly good results with the age spacing. Unfortunately, I haven't. My children are 5.5 years apart: dd 8.5 and ds 3. My dd is and always has been a tomboy which I thought would be good since she has a younger brother. But we have nothing but trouble with her getting along with her brother. She says she doesn't like him, she's not part of the family, nobody likes her, etc. I know a lot of it is jealousy as she was the only baby for 5.5 years and now she has to share the attentions with her brother. We are also a blended family, my dd has a different father than ds and I am married to ds dad so I think that is part of the issues also. DS on the other hand LOVES his sister and wants to play with her and that just annoys her more. I hope dd will come to realize her brother is OK; we are working on it.

Other than the sibling issues; I wouldn't be able to handle two in diapers, I don't think so that was a plus!

BB,
Cheryl
I think all older siblings will get irritated with younger siblings no matter what age. I watch a 8 year old girl and she has a 5 year old brother that drives her nuts and the mom says they fight all the time.

I dont know if you already do, but set some special time aside for just your 8 year old and you without the younger one. And I would also find something they could do together to form a bond. Maybe a tots gym that they could take a class together or swimming classes? It seems like they have not formed a good bond yet, I would try with all you have to set up stuff so they can have a good sibling bond.
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#39 of 41 Old 03-23-2007, 05:39 PM
 
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My brother and I are 6 years apart and I think looking back how ideal that was and still is.
As kids we never fought over toys or anything b/c my things were baby stuff to him. He has always been very protective of me. And my mom had the time to baby us both as long as we needed.
Now -- we're fabulous friends. I mean I think he's crazy and all, and we're very different. But we talk ALL the time and really support one another. I always think about how he is there for me if I needed ANYTHING... even though we live half away across the country from one another.
He has been very fatherly with me (sometimes good, sometimes bad )
And always has support and advice on the ready.

We have one son and I told DH is he wants another he'd have to wait 4-5-6 years. I agree about letting the first one have the time to wean and grow up at his own pace and giving me time too.

Nice to hear all of these stories. It's a refreshing change from the frazzled calls for help often seen in the toddler forum with those how have 2 under 3 years old. I read those and it makes me want to get my tubes tied. :

Mama to Zach 6-18-04 & Naia 10-13-10 Partner to the sweetest DH. Loving our life afloat. TV Free!
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#40 of 41 Old 03-24-2007, 12:23 PM
 
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Originally Posted by doriansmummy View Post
I think all older siblings will get irritated with younger siblings no matter what age. I watch a 8 year old girl and she has a 5 year old brother that drives her nuts and the mom says they fight all the time.

I dont know if you already do, but set some special time aside for just your 8 year old and you without the younger one. And I would also find something they could do together to form a bond. Maybe a tots gym that they could take a class together or swimming classes? It seems like they have not formed a good bond yet, I would try with all you have to set up stuff so they can have a good sibling bond.

I agree. All siblings will have their differences - no matter the age difference. I do think that for the most part, the smaller the age gap, the more pronounced the differences. Of course, that is a huge generalization, but it is my experience.

My family is also a mixed family, with my older son having an absent bio. father. This hasn't played into our family dynamic. He views his younger bro. as his complete brother in every sense of the word. My partner an dI also make sure we put aside time for our older boy that is just his. On Mondays, my partner and he go out and do something, on Wednesdays, he and I go out. Sometimes it's something simple like a game of chess at our local bookstore, at other times it's something like rock climbing or a movie. I believe that this approach has effectively averted sibling rivalry between the two boys...for now.

Molly, mama to my 3 sweet boys.
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#41 of 41 Old 03-25-2007, 01:11 AM
 
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My son is 6 and a half and daughter one year old.
I really couldnt imagine doing it with less space between them.
They get along great and it is heartwarming!!!!
plus one goes to school while i get to stay home with the other one so we get our nice alone time
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