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#1 of 66 Old 02-09-2007, 10:54 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Would you let your 4.5 year old watch The Incredibles and Monsters Inc.?
Not just those movies but movies with some scary/intense action parts?

We got the Incredibles book out of the library and ds reads it over and over and over. He loves it. It only gives the basics from the movie. Dh and I love the movie but I wonder if it isn't a bit mature for him. He has seen Finding Nemo and Robots and liked those.

We are sort of on the fence as to introducing movies like this. So far he still seems content with the gentler stuff like Thomas and There Goes a Bulldozer.
But he has been asking at the library for some of the "older kids" movies and I never know what to say.

How do you deal with this with your kids?
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#2 of 66 Old 02-09-2007, 10:58 PM
 
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Go with your gut. He has his whole life to take in that kind of stuff, what's the rush?

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#3 of 66 Old 02-09-2007, 11:00 PM
 
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DD has been watching Monsters, Inc. since she was 2. Of course, her favorite movie when she was 2 was also Pirates of the Caribbean, so she wasn't your typical 2 year old. She's just over 5 now and has been watching the Incredibles for the last couple of days. She also still enjoys Little Bear, Maggie & the Ferocious Beast and the Upside Down Show. IME watching more "mature" movies doesn't decrease interest in gentler shows. Depends on the child, though. I wouldn't recommend PotC for everyone's 2 year old.
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#4 of 66 Old 02-09-2007, 11:14 PM
 
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I've never seen The Incredibles, but I like Monsters Inc. I am not sure when it first came out on video, but my now 7 yr old saw it when it did and liked it.
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#5 of 66 Old 02-09-2007, 11:48 PM
 
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DD (4) went with us to see Children of Men a few weeks ago, loves Pirates of the Carribean, the Harry Potter movies, and her current non-kid favorite is But I'm a Cheerleader. . . I wouldn't even think of censoring kids' movies.

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#6 of 66 Old 02-10-2007, 12:02 AM
 
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My DS is 3 and loves both of those movies. Of course, his favorite movie is Star Wars and the Harry Potter movies
He's weird when it comes to cartoony type movies. they scare him way more than noncartoony ones do. Example: he refuses to watch most of the Disney movies because they are "too scary and have bad guys" but he will watch the whole Harry potter movie and not even blink.

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#7 of 66 Old 02-10-2007, 12:36 AM
 
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We do edit those movies for dd. She is 5. She just really doesn't like the intense parts. I feel better having her wait rather than risking her having a bad experience due to a movie scene.

Goodness, I still can't watch E.T. because I saw it when I was young and it scared the crap out of me. Obviously, different people are wired differently.
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#8 of 66 Old 02-10-2007, 11:13 AM
 
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I think Monsters, Inc would be alright but I would hold off on the Incredibles. I just watched that with ds (5.5) and thought it would have better at an older age although he didn't find it upsetting. You really just have to trust your judgement and observe your kid's reactions since kids are so different and sensitive to different things.

My ds really liked Jimmy Neutron, though it introduced a little new language ('kick your butt", I think was the phrase).

For a while, ds thought he had seen movies when he had actually just seen previews. Dh would find trailers on the internet and show those to ds after previewing them.

Ds loves Pokemon which isn't actually as bad as I thought. It doesn't really promote fighting, which had been my impression. The Pokemon creatures battle each other but it is more like karate to improve one's skill and earn a black belt. The word ds picked up from this show (there is always something) was "loser".

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#9 of 66 Old 02-10-2007, 04:41 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks everyone.
He is a bit sensitive, and tends to get overstimulated by lots of action and loudness. When a character on a show cries or is very angry or shows strong emotions, ds cringes or acts uncomfortable. He saw some of The Lion King at a friend's house and made them turn it off because it was scary. Yet he he loves Spongebob, which I think is weird, since he has low tolerance to loudness, and I find Spongebob to be pretty obnoxious in that respect!
There's no way I think he's ready for Pirates of the Carribean or Star Wars, those were a bit much for me at times, in a sensory way.

The Incredibles seemed a bit intense but I may just try it out and stop it if he gets freaked.
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#10 of 66 Old 02-10-2007, 04:43 PM
 
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I find this is a hard one!
So often movies that are rated 'G' but have really scary parts for young children!
ie. Bambi (when the hunter comes isn't Bambi's mother killed?) and Sleeping Beauty (think of the evil witch in the flames)

Dh usually gets movies from the local library and if we've haven't seen it, it can be very hard to tell how appropriate or inappropriate it is for dd to watch.
We watch the trailers and I read the warnings on the case first.

If something is really scary, I've found it was best for Hope if she saw it through to the end, with lots of hugs and comfort, to see it resolved, so she wouldn't have nightmares about it. Without having the scary parts resolved she has had lots of nightmares.

We also talk back to movies. Things like 'Is that real?', I think it helps her to get a sense of reality vs fantasy.

She has watched The Incredibles. She found it scary too. *I* found it scary!!! I saw it in the theatre and with the big screen and big sound I jumped each time the robot attacked! It took me 2 1/2 hours to calm down!!!
(I am a highly sensitive person as described in Elaine Aron's book The Highly Sensitive Person and I suspect Hope may be one too.)

I often will ask Hope to watch the trailer if she's not sure and usually she'll know whether it's too scary right off.

You know what? Do whatever feels right for you and your family.
I think that's the key.
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#11 of 66 Old 02-10-2007, 05:14 PM
 
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My son does not get scared easily. But, I know some children do.
Yes, we allow him to watch those movies. He also likes Harry Potter and has never been scared.. and my pulse gets going with those movies!
Each child is different.
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#12 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 12:48 PM
 
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I really think it just depends on the child. My 4 year old saw both of those movies from a young age. He also has always loved Harry Potter and his current favorite is Pirates of the Caribbean. He loves that kind of stuff and it doesn't really scare him. If he scared easily, I'd definitely restrict all of that.
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#13 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 12:55 PM
 
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We recently let our 4 yo watch Monsters Inc. with us. We're going to wait a few more years for The Incredibles, even though he's seen the preview I know it would be too much for him. I can't wait until they're old enough for Star Wars (although my mother took me to see it when I was 3.5 and I loved it!)

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#14 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 03:02 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by doriansmummy View Post
My son does not get scared easily. But, I know some children do.
Yes, we allow him to watch those movies. He also likes Harry Potter and has never been scared.. and my pulse gets going with those movies!
Each child is different.
I love the Harry Potter movies too(haven't seen all of them) but some of the scenes freaked me out, like the first one, the girl's ghost in the bathroom, and the spiders. That wouldn't necessarily freak ds out though.
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#15 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 06:55 PM
 
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My 3 yo ds thinks the talking trees in Veggie Tales Lord of the Bean are a little scary, so we would hold off on those movies.

I think most of the Disney movies are inappropriate for young children. Why is a parent always dying? I think we'll hold off until school age for those.

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#16 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 07:08 PM
 
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IMO, the first few minutes of Finding Nemo is WAY more scary than the first few minutes of Monsters, Inc. A baracuda attacks and eats the mother and 399 out of 400 babies. Then, 5 minutes later, the only remaining child is abducted! Talk about a horror movie for kids! And what about The Lion King, Barnyard, Over The Hedge . . . even Stuart Little has a scary part.

My DS, age three, knows by heart how many scary parts are in every one of his movies, when they are coming, and how long he'll have to find either my or DH's hand before it happens. I think the only movies we have that don't have any scary parts are The Wiggles and Hermie.
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#17 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 07:59 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jessy1019 View Post
DD (4) went with us to see Children of Men a few weeks ago
you took your 4 yo to a cinema to see this - but it is rated r - i am amazed that she was allowed in to watch it.
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#18 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 08:27 PM
 
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My son just turned 4 and saw both the Incredibles and Monsters, Inc. a while ago. We do censor some, but not very much. I'm fine with pretty much all "kids movies" and most grown-up movies. He's really into LOST and Grey's Anatomy But he LOOOOVES scary things and those movies didn't scare him at all. Nor did Monster House (in 3D at the theater). He's always trying to get me to rent horror movies, but I won't because I am a big fat chicken myself.
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#19 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 08:47 PM
 
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Originally Posted by OakBerry View Post
Thanks everyone.
He is a bit sensitive, and tends to get overstimulated by lots of action and loudness. When a character on a show cries or is very angry or shows strong emotions, ds cringes or acts uncomfortable. The Incredibles seemed a bit intense but I may just try it out and stop it if he gets freaked.
OP, I think that you are safe with Monsters Inc. As far as The Incredibles go, I might wait for a bit. I know how hard it is sometimes when we are trying to do the best by our kids. I got blindsided by another mom the other day. Our sons are best friends since they were 3. She wanted to take our sons to see Ghost Rider. After seeing the previews we knew that there was no way that it was appropriate for our son. She was not happy with me & let me know it. Yikes! This is the same mom who won't let her son play video games because she is concerned that some of them are violent.:
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#20 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 08:50 PM
 
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I'm going to go on the record and say that it is a major pet peeve of mine that determining appropriate content for young children is somehow equal to censorship in some people's minds.

My children are 5 and 3. I consider it a sacred responsibility to ensure that if they are viewing television or movies that the content and presentation are of a nature that is compatible with the way in which I am trying to raise them, that is, to be loving, kind, compassionate and happy children.

I simply fail to understand how knowingly putting your very young child in front of a 2 hour movie filled with vulgarity, violence, betrayal, anger and adult themes can at all be a positive situation for them.

So, perhaps I am in the minority here, but I believe children are children and adults are adults - yes there are differences in children's maturity and ability to deal with scary or violent content, but they are still children. They may talk and act mature when they hear and see these things, but cognitively they are still their age, KWIM?
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#21 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 09:15 PM
 
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i have not seen monsters inc., but i would hold off on the incredibles until age 8. it's fast-paced, as a good adventure movie should be, and fraught with tension between siblings, and has adult humor.

one movie that is good for big and little kids is cars.
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#22 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 09:18 PM
 
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Originally Posted by 4evermom View Post
I think Monsters, Inc would be alright but I would hold off on the Incredibles.
That's funny - I think Monsters Inc is scarier than The Incredibles.

I took my dd1 (now 10, think she was around 5 when it came out?) to see Monsters Inc in the theater. Oh, that was one of my worst parenting mistakes. She was traumatized for years. She had (previous to that) slept in her room, lights off and door closed. After that movie, no more of that. She will now sleep with her door closed, but she still insists on a night light. I had friends that had seen it tell me not to take her, but I didn't listen. I thought that since the monsters were scared of the little girl, it would be alright. Nooooo.....

My kids all watch The Incredibles - they are 10, 6 and 3. We have it on dvd, though I personally don't think it is good enough to buy. Dh did, so we have it.

My dd2 and dd3 still haven't seen Monsters Inc as we had such a terrible experience when dd1 watched it!

None of my kids have seen any Harry Potter, though the first one is on my list of fave movies. Just love the "fondest heart's desire" part....

My kids have all been to Disneyland a couple of times, and understand "Mickey magic" in regards to the rides and shows. We talk about the movies that way too - it isn't real; it is like Mickey magic.

I think kids are different. If you think it might be a problem for your kid, wait. My dd1 is a much different kid than dd2 or dd3.
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#23 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 09:38 PM
 
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Thanks everyone.
He is a bit sensitive, and tends to get overstimulated by lots of action and loudness. When a character on a show cries or is very angry or shows strong emotions, ds cringes or acts uncomfortable.
If your son is sensitive, DON'T. Our ds is 5 1/2. We saw Cars in the theater this summer. His first movie. He was OK, but found it fairly scary in certain spots. It's a very tame movie. It has ONE scene where the cars are being chased by a combine (yes it makes sense in the movie). He had a nightmare for several nights after the movie.

Most 'children's' movies have a structure that your average 4 year old won't understand. Kids under 6 or 7 do not understand the 'high point' narrative, where there is an intense climax, and then a resolution. They get freaked by the climax, and don't always link it to the resolution.

IMO, little kids don't belong at movies until they're 5 or 6. They definitely don't belong at R rated movies. It's up to mom and dad to determine whether they belong at other movies. Not all kids are as sensitive as our ds, I know, but I do believe kids are damaged by seeing movies that are beyond their ability to understand.

I'd rather err on the side of caution.

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#24 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 09:54 PM
 
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Most 'children's' movies have a structure that your average 4 year old won't understand. Kids under 6 or 7 do not understand the 'high point' narrative, where there is an intense climax, and then a resolution. They get freaked by the climax, and don't always link it to the resolution.

IMO, little kids don't belong at movies until they're 5 or 6. They definitely don't belong at R rated movies. It's up to mom and dad to determine whether they belong at other movies. Not all kids are as sensitive as our ds, I know, but I do believe kids are damaged by seeing movies that are beyond their ability to understand.

I'd rather err on the side of caution.
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#25 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 10:24 PM
 
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I am amazed at the movies my dd likes. When I was her age, most Disney movies scared me half to death. She LOVEs Harry Potter and Pirates and has since she was 2 yo. She has seen Monster's Inc and Incredibles with babysitters. Neither has fazed her. But I can see how both could be scary to a sensitive child. At 4 yo your child is probably old enough to deicde. Explain that there are some intense parts and maybe even give a little detail and let him decide. You can always turn it off is he says he is scared and wants to stop watching.
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#26 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 10:39 PM
 
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My DD has watched both (she is 4). I think they are both fine - but you have to trust your instincts. You could watch them both first - they are quite fun for adults too, and then judge.

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#27 of 66 Old 02-11-2007, 11:23 PM
 
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My 4 year old and I just watched Monsters, Inc this afternoon. He's a pretty scared little dude about most things, but he finds Monsters, Inc absolutely hilarious. He also loves the Incredibles, as well, and is head over heels for Cars, which I think has A LOT of adult humor in it.
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#28 of 66 Old 02-12-2007, 12:11 PM
 
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The most shocking thing I've seen lately was the exodus of a family of four (grown woman and three kids, probably aged 7 through 12) about halfway through the movie Borat. Apparently the last straw for that mom was when Borat showed the pictures of his family . . . including his naked son with prominently featured penis. Which was almost ironic, because a naked penis was about the least offensive thing in that movie.

I was just glad I didn't know they were there until they were leaving. The distraction of viewing the movie through their little eyes would have completely killed it for me.

What the hell was she thinking?
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#29 of 66 Old 02-12-2007, 12:31 PM
 
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We have both movies Incredibles and Monsters Inc and DS has seen both.
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#30 of 66 Old 02-12-2007, 01:03 PM
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I think it depends on how sensitive he is my dd is into Strawberry Shortcake and gets a little scared with a few of the movies even though she has seen them a lot and wants to watch them again. I tried to watch Monsters Inc. with dd and she hated it and was very scared so we quit almost immediately, a few months later she watched it with her class mates on movie day and her teacher said she was fine with it but she still woke with nightmares and said she didn't like it at all.
If your son isn't used to scary I would be cautious about introducing it and have a back up movie on hand that he will really enjoy.
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