My kid is dirty - Page 2 - Mothering Forums

Forum Jump: 
 
Thread Tools
Old 12-18-2007, 11:48 PM
 
425lisamarie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: In the rain
Posts: 5,233
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by MPJJJ View Post
Bathing isnt an option in my house. Dirty people stink. People who are allowed to remain dirty do not develop proper hygiene habits.
OMG that is so ridiculous. Grown ups bath for a different reason, you can't expect a little kid to always care about the same stuff on the same level. Just the same as people who are physically forced to do things develop other issues later in life...
425lisamarie is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Old 12-19-2007, 12:36 AM
 
TEAK's Mom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Juneau, AK
Posts: 2,231
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My dd1 went through about 18 months with mostly sponge bathing (age 2 to 3.5). She was terrified of the tub for some reason (and our shower is in the tub). We agreed to a nightly wipe down and I washed her hair by laying her on the kitchen counter with her hair in the sink every week or so. I was (and am) opposed to forcing. She was not gross. She did not stink. She felt safe.

At 3.5, she asked to take a bath. She was ready and has had no trouble since then. She's 5.5 and bathes easily and willingly.
TEAK's Mom is offline  
Old 12-19-2007, 12:40 AM
 
Kessed's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 1,017
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I have a friend whose child HATES water. He just hates it. He has since he was born. I tried to give him a birth when he was a few months old and I have never seen a baby get so upset.

She's gone the 'swimming' lesson route. Once a week they go to a swimming lesson. She normally stands in the pool with him trying to climb ontop of her head (we did the last session together). As the lesson goes on he will relax and most of the time he will consent to being lowered into the water. She NEVER forces him. They sat on the edge for the entire first lesson this time.

Then at the end she really quickly showers him. By that point he's gotten relaxed with all the other kids/parents being in and around water. And he doesn't mind too much being washed.

That way he gets a bath and his hair washed at least once a week. Just an idea.
Kessed is offline  
Old 12-19-2007, 01:37 AM
 
Nature's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: In Aspieville
Posts: 5,964
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
I don't force my kids to bathe. I suggest it, and I ask if they'd like to join me.. sometimes they do and sometimes they don't. My 4 yo has always hated water. She has severe sensory processing issues and water is just one she cannot tolerate often.

I understand very well, because I hate showers myself. I always have. So I myself do not shower every day either.. so I can't possibly expect my dd to.

treehugger.gifAutistic pagan mama with five kiddos on the spectrum, learning through living life. autismribbon.gif  computergeek2.gif

Nature is offline  
Old 12-19-2007, 10:03 AM
 
MPJJJ's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: I'm Positively thinking Positive!
Posts: 3,230
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
What is so rediculous about it? Ever had the pleasure of sitting next to someone with body odor? Ever go into Parents as Partners and read all the posts from wives complaining about thier DH's lack of hygiene? Bathing needs to be a priority, for the person's own health and for the curtosy of others. Letting a child go for weeks without giving them a bath is, IMO, rediculous.
MPJJJ is offline  
Old 12-19-2007, 10:20 AM - Thread Starter
 
mummy marja's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Ontario
Posts: 1,049
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
3 yr olds do not stink like grown men. He doesn't smell. I'm pretty sure that by the time he is 4 or 5, he will be ok with having a bath again. He'll probably shower twice a day when he's 15. Right now he just doesn't have any motivation.

I'm going to slowly get him used to baths again, and leave off hair washing for a while. That's the worst for him.

Thanks for all the understanding and been-there stories!

Marja: consensual-living, unschooling, piano-teaching, doula and mom to 3 creative, independent people:
DD, 8, DS, 6, and Baby DS born July 1, 2010 Married to DH for 10 years!
mummy marja is offline  
Old 12-19-2007, 10:20 AM
 
Nature's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: In Aspieville
Posts: 5,964
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by MPJJJ View Post
What is so rediculous about it? Ever had the pleasure of sitting next to someone with body odor? Ever go into Parents as Partners and read all the posts from wives complaining about thier DH's lack of hygiene? Bathing needs to be a priority, for the person's own health and for the curtosy of others. Letting a child go for weeks without giving them a bath is, IMO, rediculous.
I honestly don't think lack of hygiene in an adult stems from infrequent bathing as a toddler or young child. Its usually an indicator of a bigger problem like depression, addiction, or extreme poverty.

Bodies can sometimes smell. But even the cleanest person can smell too, regardless of the shower they just took an hour ago. Its one of those things about life you just have to get over.

treehugger.gifAutistic pagan mama with five kiddos on the spectrum, learning through living life. autismribbon.gif  computergeek2.gif

Nature is offline  
Old 12-19-2007, 10:21 AM
 
MCatLvrMom2A&X's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: With Vin Diesel ;) YUMMMM
Posts: 14,210
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
A wash cloth and a bit of soap is just as good as a bath IMHO. Sometimes I do just a few body parts like that then I try to get the rest another time. I do not think it is a good idea to force a child to do something that obviously makes them crazy upset. Especially with sensory issues. That just makes things worse.

Because of my dd's eczema she got bathed once every 2 weeks for years and spot washed the rest of the time. Sometimes a daily bath is not a good idea especially if there is a condition like eczema. She never stank or had a foul odor.

 
SAHMlady.gifread.giflovin' trekkie.giffan intactivist.gifwinner.jpg to loveeyes.gifenergy.gifDD 10/00 & superhero.gifmoon.gifDS 10/04 ribbonpb.gifIf your ds is intact, keep him safe, visit the Case Against Circ forumnocirc.gifCirc, a personal choice, Your sonsyes.gifbrokenheart.gif11/98brokenheart.gif6/99ribbonbrown.gifanti-tobaccoribbonyellow.gifThyroid cancer survivor. With cat.gif& goldfish.gif & (Boxer)dog2.gif wishing 4 whale.gif&ribbonwhite.gifsigncirc1.gifselectivevax.gifdelayedvax.gif

MCatLvrMom2A&X is offline  
Old 12-19-2007, 11:15 AM
 
MPJJJ's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: I'm Positively thinking Positive!
Posts: 3,230
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nature View Post
I honestly don't think lack of hygiene in an adult stems from infrequent bathing as a toddler or young child. Its usually an indicator of a bigger problem like depression, addiction, or extreme poverty.

Bodies can sometimes smell. But even the cleanest person can smell too, regardless of the shower they just took an hour ago. Its one of those things about life you just have to get over.
Just to clarify, are these moms who say they go weeks on end without bathing their little ones really not bathing them at all? Not even sponging them down? Even if kids don't have the same body odor that men do, not cleaning them is harmful to them. They still have oil, dirt, and dead skin cells clogging their pores. They can still get infections from genital secretions. Oily hair is more likely to become infected with lice. And bathing regularily does promote good hygiene habits. I seriously do not understand why a parent would not clean their child just because the child doesnt like it. There are lots of things my children would refuse to do. It's my job to make sure they do the things that will keep them safe and happy. Bathing is definately one of those things.
MPJJJ is offline  
Old 12-19-2007, 12:55 PM
 
Yooper's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 3,473
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by MPJJJ View Post
Just to clarify, are these moms who say they go weeks on end without bathing their little ones really not bathing them at all? Not even sponging them down? Even if kids don't have the same body odor that men do, not cleaning them is harmful to them. They still have oil, dirt, and dead skin cells clogging their pores. They can still get infections from genital secretions. Oily hair is more likely to become infected with lice. And bathing regularily does promote good hygiene habits. I seriously do not understand why a parent would not clean their child just because the child doesnt like it. There are lots of things my children would refuse to do. It's my job to make sure they do the things that will keep them safe and happy. Bathing is definately one of those things.
I do not think I saw anyone on this thread say that they just simply do not wash their child ever. People have stated all kinds of creative ways to get a kid clean, many of which do not involve an actual bath. There has also been some discussion on what "clean" means and how often little children really need to bathe. As I stated in an earlier post, my child does not bathe daily. Weekly maybe and even less so in the winter. She simply does not need it. She is not dirty. I cannot justify wasting an entire bathtub of hot water for no reason. Nor does she (or anyone) enjoy that dried-out feeling that comes from too many baths in winter. No one in my house showers daily. And no one stinks or has lice.

Also, I am not sure where you got your hair/lice info but many people on MDC do not "wash" their hair in the traditional sense. I do not. And with my dd's curly, dry hair, we never ever use shampoo. Ever. We even try to avoid getting it wet in the winter. She has never had lice. Her hair does not stink. It looks, feels, and smells like any other child's hair.

I personally do not feel that bathing daily is a real need. It is something our current society (in this country) has decided is mandatory. There are people who are healthy, live long lives, contribute to society, etc.... in cultures all over the world that probably think our obsessive "cleanliness" is very strange and wasteful. Not to mention our own society just a mere 50 years ago. Washing one's hair used to be a weekly "occasion". Taking all of that into account, I cannot understand why a parent should be discouraged from thinking outside of the box with a water-phobic child. Do you really think that working through a fear-of-baths stage is going to create an adult with poor hygiene skills?
Yooper is offline  
Old 12-19-2007, 01:04 PM
 
Mom2Joseph's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Sunshine State
Posts: 793
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by mummy marja View Post
3 yr olds do not stink like grown men. He doesn't smell. I'm pretty sure that by the time he is 4 or 5, he will be ok with having a bath again. He'll probably shower twice a day when he's 15. Right now he just doesn't have any motivation.

I'm going to slowly get him used to baths again, and leave off hair washing for a while. That's the worst for him.

Thanks for all the understanding and been-there stories!
You haven't met my kids then! Seriously, we live in FL, my kids play outside, in the dirt, and they get NASTY. I mean it. FUNKY.

My DS has sensory issues, much of them with water. He has is terrified of his face getting wet so washing his face is difficult. Washing his hair is next to impossible.

Here are some creative ideas that have helped us:

Calling it "playing in the bubbles" instead of a bath

secretly washing them in the kiddie pool during the summer (love this one!)

Offerning a shower or "wipe down" and other options

letting them play with the hose outside

"swimming" with daddy in the big pool


When DS is *very* resistant, I'm willing to let it go a day or two if he isn't filthy. However, if he is truly filthy, then I coax him in, make it fast, and get him out. Being vaguely clean is not negotiable, just like being in a car seat while in the car is non-negotiable.

I have to agree with MPJJ on a many of the points she states. Also, how do YOU feel when you are dirty for long periods of time? Gross! I don't want my children growing up feeling comfortable with being dirty. Also, at this age, they are not capable of cleaning themselves thoroughly after toileting so this too is a health and hygiene issue.

Last, but not least, consistently dirty children become cause for concern to others and I do not want anyone calling CPS on me for neglect because my kids are dirty and don't want to bathe.

I feel this is an issue where some common sense needs to prevail. It can be handled gently and with respect, but at some point it has to happen, and on a regular basis.
Mom2Joseph is offline  
Old 12-19-2007, 01:52 PM
 
CarrieMF's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Alberta/Saskatchewan
Posts: 8,864
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Oily hair is more likely to become infected with lice.
not true. Lice prefer clean hair.
CarrieMF is offline  
Old 12-19-2007, 08:24 PM
 
chrysalis's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: behind my computer or between my angels in the PNW.
Posts: 1,275
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
my dd is 5 now and she has never taken very 'regular' baths. partly my fault (mostly probably) for not having a bath time routine...its kind of whenever...if she isn't stinky i don't push it but if she is (usually just vaginal/butt stank) then i'll get her in there. if she is very resistent still, i'll just wipe her w/ some baby wipes. she really enjoys it if i get in the bath w/ her but in our new place our tub isn't as big as our other place's tub.

funny, i was just thinking that i need to get a routine for this cuz its so 'whenever'. she also hates me brushing her hair, even if its only w/ the what we call 'gentle brush' made of boars bristles. i also haven't been pushing her to brush her teeth and she now insists she is not going to the dentist ever again. ugh. so i don't make her. but i'm beginning to think this is not a good idea as she thinks she runs the show in everything...she will argue til the cows come home. i think maybe i've been tooooo lenient?

joy.gifproud solo vegan mama to fambedsingle2.gif dd, 9 spitdrink.gif & ds,4  moon.gif. "it is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness" -chinese proverb  candle.gif

chrysalis is offline  
Old 12-19-2007, 10:20 PM
 
Mom2Joseph's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Sunshine State
Posts: 793
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by chrysalis View Post
it but if she is (usually just vaginal/butt stank) then i'll get her in there.
:

That was the funniest thing I heard all day!

Seriously though...if your DD really doesn't even brush anymore, get ready for some very painful, and *expensive* trips to the pediatric dentist. I read an incredibly fantastic post on MDC once about the whole brushing teeth thing and it just rocked. This mama thought is was just soo important and really got her kids into it. I loved it. Made me more consistent about dental health care in our house.
Mom2Joseph is offline  
Old 12-20-2007, 01:16 AM
 
bwylde's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Nova Scotia, Canada
Posts: 2,823
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by CarrieMF View Post
not true. Lice prefer clean hair.
Yeah that.

DD never stinks. She has the most perfect, softest skin ever and the prettiest curly hair with no problems in regards to our cleaning methods. I've grown up with people of poor hygiene who grew up to be the cleanest people you have ever seen. This is definitely a ymmv situation but I am not going to force DD into a traumatic situation just to get her clean when she isn't really dirty.
bwylde is offline  
Old 09-04-2013, 08:52 PM
 
tittipeitto's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 61
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Most of the answers here that insist you should be like them and bathe every day, are kind of funny to me. like, my reality should be yours. Really, complete bath is not a health issue! Kids hair doesn't get greasy, and their armpits don't smell. And people can have different bed time routines. for us breastfeeding and a book has been plenty, no problems falling asleep. I've been one of those crazy people who bathe their kids when ever we feel like. For my own happiness though, since they are naked in the house a lot, we don't wipe, but WASH their bottoms after they poo, every day. (and it's true, since I've done it daily since they were born, they don't know there's a choice)

Hands, though, I had to learn the hard way. They got pinworms from school, very common I found out. Adults basicaly never get them because we wash our hands all the time, so we might get pinworms from someone but they will die out because we don't circulate them in our own bodies by scratching our booties and then eating with those fingers, sorry to be graphic, but I thought you should know.

When this happened to us, my kids finally believed me and now we wash hands before eating. Before this, i had to entice my little one to play in a sink of water with some animals to get him to wash his hands. there was times that my younger one (who has eczema, and shouldn't bathe so much anyways) hated baths, but for few years has been wanting to bathe sometimes twice a day... so anything can change. :thumb I have to do oils instead of soap so he doesn't crack in half!

some advice here is great! maybe he should start gently, with a shallow bath, no soap, and you play with him. even if he used to love it with sister, he might get scared if she splashes on him, so, start him alone... my eczema boy needs to try the water temperature many times with foot and I adjust it until he decides it's good for him...

Good luck, but mainly, don't worry, if you like the way your kid smells, all is good! Some people will think they should smell like johnsson's baby, but I like to smell real kid ;) there's nothing better (in the world of smells) than breastfeeding a little head with a hint of sand, fall wind and sweat from a hard day of lot's of fun. Johnson's baby smell would have me thinking "chemicals"

Now, when they are tween's and the real body odor comes, there's another story, my new problem, and how I ended up in this thread. Now I have to convince my kid that we don't bathe when ever we want, but like, every day, if you want to have friends :D

I can hear someone say, that THAT'S why it's good to learn the habit at birth, I would say, it's ok to learn it now.

tittipeitto is offline  
Old 09-21-2013, 01:42 PM
 
peaceful_mama's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: #12 Grimmauld Place
Posts: 4,940
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 4 Post(s)
My kids have rarely fussed about bathing, but when my oldest tried to assert independence that way, we made fun outings contingent on being clean. He was 6-7. Now the evening routine includes taking a shower and completed homework before free screen time. Theres the occasional protest, but we stick to the rule & they know.

lovin DH since 1/04, best mom for my 3 boys 10/04, 11/08, 11/10 one girlie (1/07), one 13 wk (10/13) and 5/15 just your average multigenerational living family!!
peaceful_mama is offline  
Old 09-21-2013, 03:18 PM
 
mamazee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: US midwest
Posts: 7,246
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
My kids love baths, so this hasn't been an issue, but I don't worry about how often they're bathing until they get old enough to have stinky pits. Young kids in my house end up getting a bath generally twice a week, even though they like it. They like it but always want to play right up to bedtime. Then there will be a rainy day and I'll say "Bath!" and the little one will get excited and have a bath. But the older one really needs a shower every morning at this point just like her dad and I do, and so she does shower after she wakes up each day.
mamazee is offline  
Old 09-22-2013, 12:33 AM
 
Honey693's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 3,086
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Personal hygiene is not optional here.  My kids all hate getting their hair washed but it gets done twice weekly.  No stanky kids here. 


obstruct livery vehicles

Honey693 is offline  
Old 09-24-2013, 01:44 PM
 
mareseatoats's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 1,016
Mentioned: 4 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 20 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by mummy marja View Post
Hair is curly and honestly, I don't think it looks bad. When it does get washed, it is just a little fluffier and a bit lighter in colour.

I just wanted to say my hair is curly and I wash it once a month with baking soda and vinegar. And that's it. I never get more compliments than when it hasn't been washed 3 or 4 weeks. It doesn't get greasy or smell bad. I do jump in the shower with a cap on, of course, but I'm also an adult and probably smellier ;)

 

I think it's great you don't force him. Especially with a sensory issue! So nice for him to have a mama so in-tune with him and his needs. My kids are pretty okay with baths, but not hair washing. It happens, but I also just let them play outside in the hose or play and splash in the bath without the pressure of hair washing. I sometimes spot clean (especially ears) with a wash cloth and they don't mind that.


Girl absolutely in love with boy and our DD (11/06), DS1 (08/11) and DS2 (brand new!)
mareseatoats is offline  
Old 09-24-2013, 01:56 PM
 
Alenushka's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: CA
Posts: 1,854
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 8 Post(s)

I believe in pick your battles. To me, hygiene is paramount and this is  a battle I would pick. I can not even imagine cuddling with someone who has not had bath in three weeks. I am sorry but it is gross.

 

The more he bathe he more he will get used to it.

 

I would make it nonnegotiable time and do not get emotional. Do not show that his behaviors upsets you. Right now he has perfect button to push and he manipulated you to get away with a bath,

 

That sad, get him involved.

 

1) You will have baths every day

 

2) You get to pick new bath toys

 

 

3) You can do fun things in the bath.

 

4) You can pick your own shampoo

 

 

My kids loved "paining" on the walls with the shaving cream foam (0.99  at Walgreens and lasted for a few baths). I would spray the foam on the wall and they would make designes on it with their fingers.

Alenushka is offline  
Old 09-24-2013, 03:19 PM
 
AllisonR's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 3,100
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Forget all this bathing your child every single day. If your kid loves baths, wants it as part of the daily routine, you have the time... then fine. But otherwise, kids do not need a bath every day. My kids have eczema, dry skin, and a bath every day would dry out their skin even more. And I'd rather spend time on doing things with them, making a nice dinner.... everyone has different interests and priorities. My kids are clean, they get a bath or shower twice a week. But if they have a bit of dirt on them for a day or two I am fine with that. When they were younger they enjoyed playing in the bath a lot. DD and I sometimes bathe in a tea bath. And we sometimes do an olive-oil day, where we deep condition our hair in the morning by combing tons of olive oil through our hair, and then rinsing it out in the bath or shower in the evening.

AllisonR is offline  
Old 09-24-2013, 07:14 PM
 
Polliwog's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 3,999
Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 22 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alenushka View Post

I believe in pick your battles. To me, hygiene is paramount and this is  a battle I would pick. I can not even imagine cuddling with someone who has not had bath in three weeks. I am sorry but it is gross.

The more he bathe he more he will get used to it.

I would make it nonnegotiable time and do not get emotional. Do not show that his behaviors upsets you. Right now he has perfect button to push and he manipulated you to get away with a bath,

That sad, get him involved.

1) You will have baths every day

2) You get to pick new bath toys


3) You can do fun things in the bath.

4) You can pick your own shampoo


My kids loved "paining" on the walls with the shaving cream foam (0.99  at Walgreens and lasted for a few baths). I would spray the foam on the wall and they would make designes on it with their fingers.

As I posted earlier, my son is nine and has NEVER gotten used to it. Once or twice a week, he'll quickly sit in the tub and get his hair washed. At this point, there is NO point in more than that.
Polliwog is offline  
Old 09-30-2013, 01:54 AM
 
solemum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 41
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

i don't force cleanliness at all in our house, my two boys aged four and seven love to be dirty, and I have absolutely no problems with it.   Both boys love being barefoot everywhere so their feet are filthy. I think we, as mums often worry too much about unnecessary bullshit like cleanliness when our children simply want to enjoy themselves.

solemum is offline  
Old 10-07-2013, 09:48 PM
 
Honey693's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 3,086
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by solemum View Post
 

i don't force cleanliness at all in our house, my two boys aged four and seven love to be dirty, and I have absolutely no problems with it.   Both boys love being barefoot everywhere so their feet are filthy. I think we, as mums often worry too much about unnecessary bullshit like cleanliness when our children simply want to enjoy themselves.

 

No.  Just no.  Why is hygiene optional to so many of you????


obstruct livery vehicles

Honey693 is offline  
Old 10-07-2013, 10:16 PM
 
Alenushka's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: CA
Posts: 1,854
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 8 Post(s)

When my kids were small, we had a mud pit int he backyard right by the chicken coop. My kids got dirty and muddy to their heart content. Then they would take a shower or bath and have dinner with us.

 

All is good in moderation but filth is filth.

Alenushka is offline  
Old 10-08-2013, 06:35 AM
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Georgia
Posts: 472
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)

Proper hygiene is what helps keep us healthy. As I'm sure we all know, the simple act of hand washing keeps germs at bay and is vital to stopping the spread of said germs. It is non-negotiable in our home. My kids are 3 and 5. They play inside/outside, get dirty, etc. When they get dirty and are done with getting dirty... they get clean. Dirty, barefeet are fine... outside. I don't allow the dirt to come in the house... to the best of my ability. I work hard to keep our home relatively clean and the dirt belongs outside. We live in a very tiny apartment (less than 600 sq ft, there are 4 of us) and things can get dirty quickly around here. Baths are a few times a week, but hand washing, face washing, feet washing, teeth brushing occur daily. My kids don't go to bed dirty.


Newly married 10/2013 to DH superhero.gifSAHM to DD 2007  dust.gif and DS 2010  bouncy.gif  homeschool.gifselectivevax.gifdelayedvax.gifnocirc.gifhamster.jpg
erinmattsmom88 is offline  
Old 10-14-2013, 09:46 AM
 
CamMom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Posts: 138
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
It sounds like your son has sensory issues with the water. Picking up a screaming, upset kid and putting them in the bath or shower would not be an option for me unless it was an immediate priority (they were rolling in dog doo doo). My son bathes about 5 times per week due to pollen allergies (gets transferred from head, to pillow, to eyes and nose if he goes to bed without a shower). If this isn't an issue for you, I would at least suggest implementing a strong handwashing routine before eating and after bathroom to keep germs and pollutants away from the face and mouth.
That said, eventually this will have to be dealt with- kids (even young ones) start to stink, and they sit all over the furniture and beds so the house doesn't smell great either. Also, obviously, as they get older, there will be feedback from family, friends, etc., that may hurt their feelings. My mom wasn't big on a bath routine- she grew up poor and rural, where kids didn't bathe regularly.. I was mortified when kids at school said that I "smelled" because I didn't realize I was starting to get body odor around age 9. It hurts my feelings to this day.
CamMom is offline  
Old 10-14-2013, 11:31 AM
 
USAmma's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Arizona
Posts: 18,573
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

I had one child who went through stages of hating to bathe. I just took her into the shower with me. Sometimes that went well, sometimes not, but at least while in there for a few minutes she got water on her and a quick scrubdown. I remember once we were camping. She was filthy and I had a shower tent. She really needed a bath-- not only covered in dirt but had peed on her legs trying to squat in the dirt. I took her in with me and she was throwing such a screaming fit the camp park ranger came to make sure everything was okay!

 

I don't think kids need baths every day, but washing the privates at least every other day-- even if it's just a water soak and towel wipedown-- is important. Especially if your son is not circed-- and very very important for little girls to be somewhat clean to prevent UTI's. 

 

In warmer weather I would sneak in a bath by filling the wading pool in the back yard and she would play, and I would pour soapy water on her from a bucket next to the wading pool. I also did the public swimming pool-- and while it is not the cleanest place to soak in, it's better than nothing.

 

I understand you not wanting to force him. I really do get it. But some things are just not options in my house. I remember it used to take 2 of us to brush dd's teeth. But we got through her childhood with no cavities. The "trauma" of forcing the teeth brushing by her parents in her own home saved her the real trauma of being put through a tooth filling at the dentist.


7yo: "Mom,I know which man is on a quarter and which on is on a nickel. They both have ponytails, but one man has a collar and the other man is naked. The naked man was our first president."
 
USAmma is offline  
Old 10-15-2013, 08:38 AM
 
Caneel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Small town in a rural area
Posts: 3,835
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)

Our DS went through hating baths period and I got a cheap plastic stool and put that in the bathtub.  He sat on the stool while I quickly washed and rinsed him.  It worked like a charm and he eventually moved back to regular baths.


Mom to DS, born fall 05 after ,,, wife/best friend to DH We have
Caneel is offline  
 

Tags
Child
User Tag List

Thread Tools


Forum Jump: 

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off