Toilet learning (again) - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 6 Old 08-25-2003, 12:41 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Ds is 3.5 yo and we can't find a preschool that will take him because he's not yet using the toilet. I am trying soooo hard to be patient with ds; he just doesn't want to go on the potty. OTOH, he really likes the social aspect of school and I could sure use a break. One school has said they would defer his entrance for a month while we wait and see what happens, but realistically I don't think this is going to happen in the next month.

Anyone else been through this? I need support! How do you weather the storms of sudden unacceptability when your child is a late potty trainer? I am also feeling like I am doing something wrong with potty training. How hard do I push? When do I start to worry? He doesn't want to go around without pants. He says he doesn't want to use the potty because he 'just sits there and nothing comes out.' I have tried setting a timer, watching him, asking him if he would like to sit on the potty when he is obviously having a bm, and all the rest but it's not working.

Carolyn
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#2 of 6 Old 08-25-2003, 03:40 AM
 
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DS is 4 and still has constant accidents. We started mother's day out and his teacher knew he didn't use the potty well, she just had him go every hour, and I told him if he wet his pants at school he may not go to school the next day. It worked, he was dry at school all day Now if only I could get him to do it at home. Encourage him to pee standing up, get "toilet targets" for him to aim at(or use cheerios or something that floats and flushes easily). For the pooping I don't know b/c that's been the easiest of the 2 for us. We never have poop accidents b/c he thinks poop is gross. :LOL
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#3 of 6 Old 08-31-2003, 10:44 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Thanks for your reply. Unfortunately, ds isn't interested in the potty *at all*. I'm not talking about accidents - he never uses the potty, ever. If I insist, he typically refuses and argues and/or cries until I give up. If I put him in underpants/training pants/cloth diapers he just wets/poops in them.

Targets are not interesting to him, unfortunately.

Some people have told me there are plenty of 3.5 year olds out there who are not interested in the potty at all, but I don't know of any. I know of kids who have accidents, but they are basically using the potty.

I'm just so discouraged. I want this to be a happy transition, but can't think of any other way to 'encourage' him than to just tell him "you must do it" and tell him he can't go anywhere until he can use the potty.

What's the latest you have heard of someone *initiating* potty learning? When do I take him to the doctor to have him checked for a physical problem?

Why is this so hard? Not sleeping through the night for 18 months was easy; two bouts of thrush were a walk in the park compared to this!

Carolyn
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#4 of 6 Old 09-01-2003, 07:26 AM
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My dd is 3 years, 4 months. Not interested *at all* in the potty. Personally, I don't propose it more than once or twice a week - and then only if the conversation has been centered around pee pee or caca.

No advice. Just wanted to know there are others out there.

A friend's 2.5 yo old trained in one day. Oh well! Mine is more creative and doesn't throw anywhere near the tantrums she does!

Be patient! I can imagine it must be frustrating about the preschool. Any other options for socialization?
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#5 of 6 Old 09-02-2003, 10:52 PM
 
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My son was born 6/6/00 and just started peeing in the potty last week. I've been encouraging him with no pressure. What really helped was to let him run around naked in the back yard. I had a little potty set up out there and told him it was the only place he was allowed to pee. Somehow he brought that concept inside as well. Now if we could only get pooping in the potty covered.

Many children are late bloomers with using the potty. Would you expect your child to walk before he was ready? Than why would you expect him to use the potty before he was ready? Hang in there.

Have you tried positive reinforcement? Stickers or special time together for using the potty....Just an idea
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#6 of 6 Old 09-02-2003, 10:53 PM
 
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My son was born 6/6/00 and just started peeing in the potty last week. I've been encouraging him with no pressure. What really helped was to let him run around naked in the back yard. I had a little potty set up out there and told him it was the only place he was allowed to pee. Somehow he brought that concept inside as well. Now if we could only get pooping in the potty taken care of.

Many children are late bloomers with using the potty. Would you expect your child to walk before he was ready? Than why would you expect him to use the potty before he was ready? Hang in there.
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