Good things are happening in February, May '04 Mamas!!! - Page 5 - Mothering Forums

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#121 of 380 Old 02-11-2008, 06:53 PM
 
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I am at work now, in the three seconds of relative calm I get (babe is sorta-sleeping on the big bed in the parents' room, and Rowan is watching Pingu--OMG Pingu RULES. Even *I* find it entertaining!)

But I wanted to say that I am blushing and flattered that you all think *I* should write our chick-lit novel! That warms my heart in so many ways...and seeing what I *HAVE* written in the past few months (you don't even WANT to know! maybe I ought to, ahem, focus my energies on something more productive!
For real. Lemme think on it some.

And seriously, thank you all for being so awesome.
Back to work. Blah.
MMF!
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#122 of 380 Old 02-11-2008, 06:54 PM
 
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A bit frazzled from HJ not : very well and having a scary choking spell this morning. Better this afternoon. Girls theoretically napping and HJ and I have some work to do upstairs....rather I work and he watches....

Jacquie---if it starts coming out the other end for G....run for the acidophilus/probiotics as that can help it not last as long. My DH always feeds too soon, but I think he's learning.

More to say, but feeling kinda flaky. I'll blame it on Claudia's iPhone glitch!

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#123 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 01:38 AM
 
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Heather, sending you lots of support for feeding HJ and sorry you had a scary choking spell! Every single day I think of you and am inspired to keep on keepin' on, because Heath is up there doin' it too.

Need to go get my mm socks on, my feets be cold.

Just treading water, here...

Danile I've been wanting to mention that I am also soooo glad it appears to be no biggie in your breasts, so to speak. Thank heaven for that.

I think I'm going to go collapse now...
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#124 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 05:52 AM
 
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My turn for some good news! You mamas may remember various times I've bemoaned my procrastination on paying various bills, including avoiding confusing medical bills. Well, I spent a month paying my babysitter 2 hrs every Monday, getting my sh*& together, and today I went in and spoke to a membership services representative at my local Kaiser clinic. We owed over $2000 in medical stuff, and after today, I'm down to about $800 !!! First there was a bunch of stuff that I was pretty sure I didn't really owe, and it turns out I'm probably right, but then there was almost $300 that we really DID owe, and apparently 2 weeks ago, Kaiser decided we were poor and unable to pay, and they just WROTE IT OFF, as a charitable contribution or whatever! I feel like God is smiling on me, and I feel so humbled and blessed. I almost want to cry I'm so happy. My dad gave me money to pay all the bills for Christmas (yes, and paid for that trip to Cali- bless him!), so after I subtract my babysitter's wages and the money we actually owe to insurance, I'm stuck with the wonderful problem of checking with my dad before I spend the rest of the money on groceries and maybe even a bit into educational savings for the boys. Hooray!

Tomorrow is hopefully Luke's last feeding clinic ever. We gave the pump back last week. I'm stuck with another wonderful problem of what to do with all the yucky hi-cal formula he won't drink (he's drinking choc. pediasure, which is finally being covered by insurance).

Yesterday, Will's birthday party, was stressful and full of family drama and two headbumps for the birthday boy (one self-inflicted in a tantrum, the other because I wasn't watching him well enough , but today's good news definitely helps.

babe up- gotta go.

love to all, and yes, let's write that chic-lit.
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#125 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 12:31 PM
 
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That is AWESOME, Fern! Great news.

Meg, also wanted to comment on how supremely awesome your surprise money is! What are you going to do with it?
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#126 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 01:39 PM
 
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Fiddle, how awesome is that news! Yay for you!
Hi Elsanne! I hope you have a good day.

Okay, so let's see how much time I have to post before Rowan demands something else from the kitchen.

So it's our customary Tuesday in front of laptop/television : And this is my dilemma for the morning: how do you *encourage* a 3.75 year-old to do anything other than EXACTLY what he wants, especially when that something is HOURS and HOURS of TV??? :
You know that just turning the stupid thing off and saying a firm "no more" will get you a full-on, screaming tantrum...of course.
But what about when gently explaining the myriad reasons you can come up with (tv is tired, it needs a rest, we need to do something else--even when there are no concrete plans--hey! Let's do a puzzle/art project/ANYTHING ELSE) will bring the VERY SAME screaming tantrum???
What if just throwing up your hands and saying "FINE, whatever you want" is the only, and I MEAN THE ONLY, way to keep the tenuous peace in the morning?

So guess what we're doing this morning? Yeah.

At least rest time will be here soon and then in the afternoon for some reason, it's generally easier to keep the damn television off.
And at least we're not watching "bad" TV...ah heck, at this point I'm grasping at straws. Yay.

I'm not even upset/guilty/angry. I'm just...apathetic, at this point. *sigh*
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#127 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 02:09 PM
 
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If it were up to me and only me, Sol would watch TV sometimes. If it were up to her, she would watch TV all day. Since Viet is adamantly anti-tv and will do the work involved in not watching tv, I can do it. The "other thing" has to be better than TV, planned, ready to go. Or, you can sit there and paint, and wait for him to come join you.

The Path of Least Resistance is sounding really good about now. So, so tired of resistance. Yesterday would have been a tv day if I was in charge of the kids.

my .02....probably an excursion is the only thing better than tv in his world?
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#128 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 02:42 PM
 
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I am the QUEEN of the Path of Least Resistance lately. The Patron Saint. The veritable GODDESS. : Yup.
Thanks for the thoughts, Els.
I forgot to mention that another hinder in our thoughts to do anything else, is the fact that it. is. FREEZING! Sooooo cold, so getting the diaper bag packed, then the kid sufficiently suited for the cold, plus myself, then to the car and...wherever we end up (I have NO PLANS. Ack!) well...it glues my ass to the couch. I admit it.

Yeah...post-rest-time (for us both) will bring more action. I hope. We have to go to music class tonight, at the very least. Wheeeeee. I am not fond of music class...DH usually takes him, but every class has gotten harder and harder for DH or Rowan to deal with, so we're pretty sure this session will be the last. Times, they are a changin'. But anyway, Rowan requested Mama to come with him and DH this week. So, though I REALLY REALLY don't wanna go (don't WANNA! ) I'm going.
Path of Least Resistance, you see. *sigh*
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#129 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 05:06 PM
 
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Heather, how did the milkscan go? Or, how did the 4 hrs pre-scan go, more specifically?
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#130 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 05:14 PM
 
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sorry i haven't been posting much lately... been reading, but the long replies don't work when stefan is awake, and marek doesn't take naps anymore so i'm S.O.L. for staying in the mdc posting groove.

i think of you all often and check in with you whenever i see a new post.

MMF!

~claudia
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#131 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 05:52 PM
 
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hi mamajammas i'm hooooome. it was so stinkin nice down in cali i called doug and told him i wasn't coming home until JUNE when it would possibly be warm in portland. it was luverly and sunny and we wore *gasp* tshirts outside the house without coats. oh the BLISSSSSS! and i just love the bay area. looooooove it. i realize now how much time i spent there in college and boy was that a long time ago. i also love old friends

sorry lisa i should have PMd you my cell before i left. but checking in now i see you were deathly ill and were probably recuperating all weekend! yikes - that sounds like a scary sickness.

fernie - great news from kaiser

renae - i have a tv-obsessed kiddo here too (one of those self-inflicted things where i let it get to this point). i put the kitchen timer on if i can tell it is going to be tricky to turn the tube off. pick your time limit and explain it and then stick with it come hell or high water. after a tantrum or 2 he'll get the picture. if we have nothing going on i usually let isaac watch and hour and a half in a day. that sounds horrible. i wish it were a half hour max but it isn't. he gets to pick one movie or it is like 3 shows (not usually all at once). well on school days he usually gets a half hour in the morning while i shower so it is less. but if we are home and i am trying to answer work emails or whatever....it is frequently tv time.

elsanne - oh mama. shopping for dishes in a market with 2 kiddos in tow on cobbled streets sounds like enough to send me to the BRINK. starting with how do you even carry the dishes when your arms are full!!!??? i hope your 'groove' gets a little easier and well....more groovy. SOON! like TODAY!! one piece of advice i took to heart out of the pdx thread is 2 mamas expressed they enjoyed single parenting more than parenting in an unsupportive relationship. it kind of surprised me because you would think *some* help would be better than no help. but there's that whole expectation and getting let down thing which bites the big one. and i think if you really ARE a single mama you find other support resources. not sayin you should leave viet or whatever.....just sayin. i put it in my mental coffers in case i should find myself feeling unsupported in the future.

danile - i'm glad your boobage is ok.

ebin figured out how to crawl (jerkily) and popped out 2 more teeth yesterday.

ok. more to respond to but i should work and/or eat lunch. and i'll probably post again later
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#132 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 06:01 PM
 
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danile - i'm glad your boobage is ok.
:::

Thanks for that Jstar... I needed that laugh today.

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#133 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 06:31 PM
 
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test went swimmingly....hj being a super cool rock star baby and all. He actually wasn't even hungry/fussy until right before the test. Bad part is he would only drink 1.5oz in the allotted 10 minutes so that might not yield helpful results. But another hoop jumped through and on from there...

doing the same as claudia....

boobage!

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#134 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 09:14 PM
 
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Isn't it boobages, not boobage? After all it was both sides (IIRC).
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#135 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 09:14 PM
 
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Boobage

Heather~good job hj! I hope you get some answers, that has to be frustrating.

The weather is so nice today, I love it! I took the kids outside and Saige rode her scooter around with her friends. I hear we're going to get more snow tomorrow though
I decided to put Saige in a tumbling class at the community center. It doesn't start until March, but she is way excited.
That is a good idea about the timer, I'm going to have to try that.
I should be starting dinner instead of sitting here, but I've been so burnt out the last couple days, I actually played guitar hero yesterday instead of folding laundry :
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#136 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 09:16 PM
 
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boobage refers to the collective, KK....get it straight!

the weather here is decidedly not nice today....getting icy out and waiting on DH and the girls to get home. Meesa...I'll come visit you instead!

okay....my late napping boy-o is waking....time to :

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#137 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 09:22 PM
 
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Yours might be collectable, but mine are not. (Envision the wandering boob.):
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#138 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 09:27 PM
 
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I know I've done my fair share of whining... but can I whine just one more time? *Hopefully*

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#139 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 10:07 PM
 
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TC- I think we're living the same life.

Danile, whine away.

And : all around, though I don't have hands-free time to post. Is is terrible that I really, really, really hate nursing my 18mo? I mean, hate it. Like, the way a guy's nads run away from cold water (or Heath's boots) my nips run when they see the babe coming. I feel so awful, but I just hate. it. so. much. I was talking to a friend with a babe the same age, and I asked if she ever just recoiled at the thought of nursing, and she said, very calmly, "No, I don't mind at all." What's wrong with me?
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#140 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 10:12 PM
 
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whine away!

boobage being plural

thanks for the ideas on the office thang oy. i try not to work with kids around but do have them mondays and fridays. and wednesdays i have ebin alone. i do the bulk of my work on tu/th but envision needing to work for an hour or so here or there when i have deadlines. so i was thinking a place with room for a play area might work for those instances where i have to run in and do edits and email out something on a deadline. right now i use king tv during those instances and just work from the couch : once i actually get an office i plan to have all my paper&crap at the office so i don't know how much the couch thing will work

today has been productive so i feel pretty good. very lackluster billings with all this vacationing : (i'm doing invoices) tsk tsk on me

i now have no plans to go anywhere...and that bums me out. i'm the kind of person that needs that vacation carrot out there.


i'm ready for some nice weather. i'm REALLY craving working in the yard and planting some things.

i think i'll head out and get big boy at school. i did take him on the trip btw. (i can't remember if i posted that i was taking him or just that he wanted to go). flying was smooth and he actually went and stayed the night with SIL in sacramento on thursday. his first sleepover! with nary a pause for separation anxiety. it was more like 'can we go NOW aunty???' she took him to fairytaleland park which he loved. and then he stayed at the hotel the last night with my mom and i went back to staying with my friend. (i stayed 2 nights with her. ebin woke so much the first night all she could say was 'WOW!')

ok. my boobage is going to *explode* with milk right now. usually i can make it through the day without pumping (didn't bring the pump). but mr. teether has been a MILK MONSTAHHHHHHHH
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#141 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 10:18 PM
 
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Whine away, Danile (but not in a shrill voice, pretty please ).

Juice, the answer is that clearly you are a Bad Mother. Or maybe you're just pregnant. (Okay, I need to stop before you deck me.) I sometimes hide from L, and she's older than yours (hmm... can't quite figure out with my addled brain if that makes me a Worse Mother or a Better Mother . I think it's so so so normal with toddler nursing. And to you. (Lately, L has been coming up to me, patting me on the boob--oh, how I hate to be felt up by a demented dwarf--and saying, "nursing pillow"--to which I respond, "No, it's a breast" and then she shrieks "BEST!!!" and then I have the nipple shrinkage you mentioned.)
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#142 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 10:20 PM
 
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Dominic has been diagnosed with motor delays, specifically pertaining to his hands and feet..

I'm devastated. My heart feels broken. He's absolutely beautiful and when i get told this it feels like "how did i let that happen? what did i do to cause that? was it his awful birth? was it me not spending enough time developing those muscles with him?" i just want to cry.

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#143 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 10:28 PM
 
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And Juice- I totally understand that feeling. At that point nursing was a love/hate relationship for us. SOmetimes I loved it and never wanted it to go, other times I hated it and tried to remain calm during a nursing session. Funnily enough... KK was pretty close with how it was for us. I was either pregnant or about to become pregnant when we got to that stage. Good luck! I hope it gets easier for ya!

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#144 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 10:36 PM
 
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How many of us here have kids who have or have had some kind of delay? (Raise your hands, chicas; Danile, my hand is raised... Danile, you are not alone in this, so whine away. ) Not that I'm minimizing what you're going through, because I was definitely there with Z. You didn't "let it happen". (Easier for me to say; it's easier to realize that it's not Mama's fault when the kid with the delays is #2 rather than #1.) I assume he's going to be getting either PT or OT, and it can be amazingly incredibly helpful (and it will help *you* see that you're an awesome mom and that you can help tremendously in helping him overcome his delays).

(The "older" May Mamas know this, but you may not: Z had oral motor and gross motor delays, and he was unable to take in enough calories independently and had to have naso-gastric feeding supplementation for about 2 months and also had about 2 years of occupational therapy to deal with his delays. We're lucky, because he's all caught up now, and he's been done with OT for over a year. We had a very "happy ending", and I wanted to share that with you so you don't feel like Dom's situation is the end of the world; it's not. Kids are amazingly adaptable at this age, and the various therapies can be incredibly helpful.)
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#145 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 10:41 PM
 
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Thank you KK. Beyond words, thank you.

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#146 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 11:08 PM
 
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danile--the one thing I love about this group is that we see each other through everything. I'm three for three with reflux kiddos *and* qualifying for early intervention. We're the rock stars of developmental delays. **hugs** It is hard on a mama's heart though to want to make things easier for them. Share more when you're ready!

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#147 of 380 Old 02-12-2008, 11:41 PM
 
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Danile, it is in the nature of a mama to wonder what was WRONG WITH HER that this could happen to her child. Please don't be hard on yourself - congratulate yourself for being aware of what's going on and helping and supporting him in any way you can. That's what mothering is all about.


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Juice, the answer is that clearly you are a Bad Mother. Or maybe you're just pregnant. (Okay, I need to stop before you deck me.) I sometimes hide from L, and she's older than yours (hmm... can't quite figure out with my addled brain if that makes me a Worse Mother or a Better Mother . I think it's so so so normal with toddler nursing. And to you. (Lately, L has been coming up to me, patting me on the boob--oh, how I hate to be felt up by a demented dwarf--and saying, "nursing pillow"--to which I respond, "No, it's a breast" and then she shrieks "BEST!!!" and then I have the nipple shrinkage you mentioned.)
KK, : : thank you so, so much for the chuckle (which was typed 'chickle', which I think is appropriate with the current chick lit theme) and for the understanding. Demented dwarf, indeed. In the past, when I've felt this way, I assumed it WAS because I was pregnant, but since we've had the big 'ole V, I'm pretty sure I'm not. My body just despises nursing anyone past 18 months. As much as I wish it weren't true. It's even worse at night... I'm feeling sad that I know his nursing days are numbered. I spend all my days at work telling people to listen to their bodies, and I know it holds true for me as well. I don't want our relationship to be poisoned by my resentment, which I KNOW he feels... *sigh*

Renae, I still haven't figured out why you kick yourself so for the TV watching. I try to limit my kids' TV, ONLY because they are little monsters if they watch too much. But if everyone is happy, and if you're still doing things together and as a family, whose business is it but your own? You're not abandoning him. Don't know if you've seen this love letter to spongebob, but I think there are some good points there.

Heather, I've been meaning to say for days that GO YOU, there are so many reasons I want to call you SuperFeather.

Many, many more thoughts, and hugs to all the MMF. But I have to go nurse the Demented Dwarf. (at least I'll do it with a smile)
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#148 of 380 Old 02-13-2008, 01:13 AM
 
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Reading, thinking, hugging, laughing...no time to post.

Love to all-

Sarah
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#149 of 380 Old 02-13-2008, 04:48 AM
 
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Danile- My hand is raised too. You probably know L had a feeding tube for almost 2 years. He also has a receptive communication delay (so he doesn't understand what's said/asked of him at the level of other kids his age), a social delay (doesn't interact with his peers at the same level), a cognitive delay (mostly relating to not being able to perform tasks, not that he's not smart enough, but he's unable to focus on what's asked of him), and an adaptive delay (relating to the feeding- that's pretty much caught up now). I SO understand the questioning of self. Even now, 3 years after we first noticed delays/ failure to thrive, I still sometimes bounce back and forth between (a) I'm a bad mother because I decided to do the feeding tube- he's just who he is and I have tortured him needlessly, and (b) I'm a bad mother because I didn't nurse him the "right way" and I didn't get the tube soon enough and I didn't work hard enough to figure out WHY he had reflux and and and. This is on a bad day. On good days, I am proud of how hard I have worked to help him be all he can be. And L is slowly catching up. And while the diagnosis IS devestating in the beginning, it's the first step in getting help. I agree with KK that therapy can be incredibly positive, helpful, and empowering.

For a while you'll probably see Dom through his new label, but pretty soon you'll be able to remember that the label is just that- a description of the Dom you've known and loved all along.

Juice- I really don't think it would be horrible for you to wean. I don't believe in child-led weaning, because I believe there are TWO people in a nursing relationship (at least ) and both of them get a say. I nursed L until he was almost 3, and wanted to stop, but during my pregnancy he got to nurse about 2 minutes, once a day. Cause that's all I could willingly give him. So follow your heart and listen to your body (and hopefully get the two of them to agree )

W is sick with _another_ tummy bug. Pukies last night and tonight, fever, lots of runny dipes. He's still nursing well, so I'm not worried. His lil head barely has a bump from his head-dive onto the vacume cleaner that I wasn't close enough to prevent () Thank goodness for Arnica oil!

We had our last feeding team appointment EVER today. L is "graduated." He's kept a growth curve with about a 17% bmi for almost a year. His bmi when we started was -3%, so I have to remember that on my self-inflicted-guilt days.
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#150 of 380 Old 02-13-2008, 07:47 AM
 
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holy cannoli FF ---that rocks!!

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