Feeling left out bc I'm not pregnant/have newborn thread - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 20 Old 12-09-2008, 08:28 PM - Thread Starter
 
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So my sis just had her baby today. Unplanned pregnancy, father's has a criminal record of child abuse and spousal abuse (including my sis), and he is unemployed, but still- she has a baby. Friends are preggo, neighbors have had kids born and then another sibling born, strangers are even having kids, and me? No.

It's depressing. Waiting and waiting and waiting...

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I survived 16 mos! Ask me about breastfeeding a baby with posterior tongue tie, high palate, and weak oral motor skills- whew!

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#2 of 20 Old 12-09-2008, 08:30 PM
 
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it stinks when you're ready, but it hasn't happened yet... and there are babies everywhere you look

I'm right there with you. I guess technically, I'm wanting but waiting (on dh to be ready).
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#3 of 20 Old 12-10-2008, 02:10 AM
 
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I'm sorry - it is sooo hard. We went through 6years of it.

Surviving sleep deprivation one day at a time with dd (Oct '11) & ds (Oct '08).

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#4 of 20 Old 12-10-2008, 03:41 PM
 
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I totally sympathize with you! I didn't have babies on the brain until about 4 months ago, and now it seems like they are everywhere I look and we're not ready to start trying quite yet. My coworker just had a baby, our next door neighbors just had a baby, and my SIL just got pg. I guess the upside is that I get to at least interact with babies until we have our own! It does make the waiting even harder, though.
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#5 of 20 Old 12-10-2008, 03:46 PM
 
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i'm right there with you -

younger bro and SIL just had 4th "surprise" baby

friend who said wanted to get preggers after i started trying just found out she's preggers with # 2 (they'll be "irish twins")

i am active on many forums and it seems like everyone there is pregnant but me - including an extremely annoying person who was whining about trying for "years". after i sent her a PM about FF to see if she was charting, she was kind enough to say that, well, they'd only really been trying for two months and she was just frustrated at how long it's taking.... she's now preggers

then, yesterday i had to sit in an Ob waiting room while literally 25 to 30 pregnant women came in and out - all while i got to sit there waiting to get my HSG done

mom to Andrew   born Feb 6th, already a mom to child with fur; and still missing and still wondering about the lost possibilities Mar 17, 2009
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#6 of 20 Old 12-10-2008, 04:01 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by Catubodua View Post
i'm right there with you -

younger bro and SIL just had 4th "surprise" baby

friend who said wanted to get preggers after i started trying just found out she's preggers with # 2 (they'll be "irish twins")

i am active on many forums and it seems like everyone there is pregnant but me - including an extremely annoying person who was whining about trying for "years". after i sent her a PM about FF to see if she was charting, she was kind enough to say that, well, they'd only really been trying for two months and she was just frustrated at how long it's taking.... she's now preggers

then, yesterday i had to sit in an Ob waiting room while literally 25 to 30 pregnant women came in and out - all while i got to sit there waiting to get my HSG done
Not fair.

I came home last night after seeing the baby and cried to my husband. He thinks I'm being irrational because he hasn't said "no" to having more, just not right now. May 09 is when it's up for discussion, but with the current job market, we're unsure if he'll find a job and the opportunity for another then might be postponed. <sigh>

I talked to my (preggo) bf this morning and we spoke about her upcoming delivery (a couple weeks). I can't help but be happy for her, but at the same time I'm sad. Sometimes I feel bitter, like I shouldn't be happy- evil, right?

Momma to DD (12/04) hearts.gif and DS (11/09) hbac.gif.
I survived 16 mos! Ask me about breastfeeding a baby with posterior tongue tie, high palate, and weak oral motor skills- whew!

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#7 of 20 Old 12-15-2008, 09:57 PM
 
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I don't necessarilty feel left out, just sad that I don't have a little one yet. All of the women of "child-bearing" age in my family have all had children within the last couple years, three close friends had babies this past summer, and three friends are pregnant right now! I have had "baby fever" for three years and am so ready to TTC. Thankfully, the end is in sight....about five more months of waiting!

Our beautiful baby girl arrived 2/17/2010
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#8 of 20 Old 12-16-2008, 12:50 AM
 
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my brother keeps getting his girlfriend preggo by accident ( 3 times!) and I'm impatiently waiting to TTC b/c I want to be responsible ( and he has never been...) : Frustrating. I know. Our time will come though.

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#9 of 20 Old 12-16-2008, 12:53 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Thankfully, the end is in sight....about five more months of waiting!
Looks like we'll be trying together (well, not actually together, but gettin' it on simultaneously )...unless an passionate "accident" happens before then!

Momma to DD (12/04) hearts.gif and DS (11/09) hbac.gif.
I survived 16 mos! Ask me about breastfeeding a baby with posterior tongue tie, high palate, and weak oral motor skills- whew!

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#10 of 20 Old 12-16-2008, 12:55 AM - Thread Starter
 
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my brother keeps getting his girlfriend preggo by accident ( 3 times!) and I'm impatiently waiting to TTC b/c I want to be responsible ( and he has never been...) : Frustrating. I know. Our time will come though.
Isn't that always how it goes?? My sister has had 2 unplanned, unwanted pregnancies (you think she would have learned to put a cap on it after the first) and still thinks she's infertile. :

Momma to DD (12/04) hearts.gif and DS (11/09) hbac.gif.
I survived 16 mos! Ask me about breastfeeding a baby with posterior tongue tie, high palate, and weak oral motor skills- whew!

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#11 of 20 Old 12-16-2008, 10:40 AM
 
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I'll join here too, although I probably don't belong, since it seems to be for those who don't have children yet. I probably sound very selfish, but I don't mean to be. I've wanted another baby like immediately after I had my youngest, but have yet to have my fertility return. She will be 2 in 12 days. I am undergoing some tests to check things out (hormone-wise).

We visited Santa on Saturday, and it was torture seeing all the tiny beautiful babies . I could only look at them & yearn for one; I couldn't even smile at the parents . I've had 2 single sisters have babies in the last year as well. It stings so bad to hear news like that.

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#12 of 20 Old 12-16-2008, 01:34 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Originally Posted by wild~blossom View Post
I'll join here too, although I probably don't belong, since it seems to be for those who don't have children yet. I probably sound very selfish, but I don't mean to be. I've wanted another baby like immediately after I had my youngest, but have yet to have my fertility return.
There is no discriminating amoung women who want a baby!

Momma to DD (12/04) hearts.gif and DS (11/09) hbac.gif.
I survived 16 mos! Ask me about breastfeeding a baby with posterior tongue tie, high palate, and weak oral motor skills- whew!

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#13 of 20 Old 12-16-2008, 03:29 PM
 
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There is no discriminating amoung women who want a baby!
Good!

Anyone else already obsessed with baby names?? I have a boy & girl name picked out, but I don't like sharing them for fear of someone "stealing" them (in my family, I mean) .

For a girl, I LOVE Saige Amberlyn, and for a boy, Dylan James. DH & I also like Isabelle for a girl, but it's so popular.

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#14 of 20 Old 12-16-2008, 03:39 PM - Thread Starter
 
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For a girl, I LOVE Saige Amberlyn, and for a boy, Dylan James. DH & I also like Isabelle for a girl, but it's so popular.
I've been thinking about them a little- my taste changes so frequently that I can't make up my mind. I like both of those names- Saige Amberlyn sounds so natural and Dylan James so classical. And Isabelle, it's beautiful- if you like it don't keep it's popularity from giving it to a girl.

Momma to DD (12/04) hearts.gif and DS (11/09) hbac.gif.
I survived 16 mos! Ask me about breastfeeding a baby with posterior tongue tie, high palate, and weak oral motor skills- whew!

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#15 of 20 Old 12-16-2008, 04:07 PM
 
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I've been thinking about them a little- my taste changes so frequently that I can't make up my mind. I like both of those names- Saige Amberlyn sounds so natural and Dylan James so classical. And Isabelle, it's beautiful- if you like it don't keep it's popularity from giving it to a girl.
Thanks! We've had the boys name picked out for about 7 years, when I was PG with #4. The first 3 are boys, so imagine my shock when I finally got a girl! Then 2 more girls after that! Now I want another boy so bad, it's not funny.

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#16 of 20 Old 12-16-2008, 05:05 PM
 
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I have totally gone through this, and have been still. Last summer I thought I would go insane if I saw another woman pg or with a little baby. I was super sad for myself, I was in the wanting but waiting mentality and it sucked. Now we are in full TTC mode and I am just hoping that we can have a baby soon. My friend is due in a month with an "oops" kid and is going crazy with her DP and DD. Then here's me who wants a baby bad and am just trying and she has an "oops", it is so annoying:.

Me Wife to T (14 years)Mama to Princess(4) and Monster Boy(my 1 year old ):
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#17 of 20 Old 12-17-2008, 09:09 PM
 
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I can understand. I'm 33 and we have no kids. It gets harder every year I think. My family wrote me off as never having children years ago (if they ever actually thought I would). Christmas is hard for me this year because I keep getting the Christmas is for kids, or this/that/everything else is for kids. It really sucks. Our friends are done having kids, most years ago. It seems I get more looks as I get older when people find out I am childless. I've wanted children for three years, DH says he's ready but we are still building the house we started years ago. I am getting ready to call it close enough but I really do want it done because I want to stay home and that won't happen it if's not done and the mortgage finalized.

Mama to my sweet Sophia, born at home on 4/6/11.
 
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#18 of 20 Old 12-19-2008, 02:00 AM
 
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Count me in on baby name obsession! We have Bella picked out for a girl which goes really well with our italian last name. For a boy, not so easy. I don't want another E name. We joke a lot about weird names. Like for instance, ( inside joke I guess) the name Luigi Oujia. ( say it, it has a ring to it. LMAO)

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#19 of 20 Old 12-22-2008, 05:38 PM
 
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Hi Wateraddict! I so feel for you... we recently lost our baby and now my DH isn't so sure he wants to try again for a while. As you know, we have been having these conversations for years (and it's really been years)... it's bad enough to suffer a miscarriage, but then to be told we should just wait a while, GRRR! There are no words to express the feeling!

I feel like everywhere I go there are pregnant bellies and babies! Yes, God has blessed us with two healthy kids - but, I don't know how much longer I can take the waiting. It's really hard when we want kids! I am hoping that he will just throw caution to the wind - I think he's just scared to try again... just trying to lay low right now and see what happens I guess.

I hope you get your house done soon!!!
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#20 of 20 Old 12-22-2008, 09:58 PM
 
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Fantasia. I am so sorry to hear you miscarried after that long long wait. I hope your DH is able to come around soon.

Mama to my sweet Sophia, born at home on 4/6/11.
 
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