Is anyone 'addicted' to having more kids? - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 22 Old 08-12-2009, 06:52 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Women's Health published an article on 'bumpaholics' - women who love having babies for the sake of having babies.

What does everyone think about this? Does anyone know a bumpaholic?
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#2 of 22 Old 08-14-2009, 03:13 AM
 
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i don't know if this answers your question, but, i HATE HATE HATE being pregnant, yet i LOOOOOOVE labor and birth.

i had both my kids at home, and they were two of the best times i've had in my life. and, no, i did not have orgasmic births! quite the opposite, in fact. i just love watching it all unfold, it's endlessly fascinating to me.

so, there may be more kids in our future, but if i could only do the labor/birth part over and over, i would.

and yes, i know that is a very odd thing to admit!
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#3 of 22 Old 08-14-2009, 03:20 AM
 
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If that's odd, here is another odd one checking in . And you know what, MDC is full of us . I hate being pregnant too, also love labor and birth, but I love babies even more . So I wonder what they mean by having babies for the sake of having babies. Ehm... isn't that the point of having babies? Why else would you have babies?

I'm Olivia. I blog about physiological childbirth, homebirth, and unassisted homebirth!
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#4 of 22 Old 08-17-2009, 10:11 PM
 
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Originally Posted by MittensKittens View Post
.So I wonder what they mean by having babies for the sake of having babies. Ehm... isn't that the point of having babies? Why else would you have babies?
I think they might mean just for the pregnancy and birth experience. Or possibly because they are only babies for so long and then they start growing up? So wanting a baby but not necessarily wanting a child?
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#5 of 22 Old 08-19-2009, 03:43 PM
 
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:: That's me. I actually think I told someone with my first that I couldn't wait to give birth, but I didn't know what I was going to do afterwards. The thought of being responsible for a whole 'nother person was a bit much for me, but the call of birth was irresistible.

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So I wonder what they mean by having babies for the sake of having babies. Ehm... isn't that the point of having babies? Why else would you have babies?
I think they mean: "having babies for the sake of having babies" not "having babies for the sake of having babies"
Does that make sense? Having = birth (as in, "I just had a baby!") not having= "owning" one ( "Do you have a baby?")
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#6 of 22 Old 08-22-2009, 08:05 AM
 
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if you search, someone posted the article, perhaps in the TTC forum. it wasn't that long ago - lots of interesting comments

while i don't have any opinion whatsoever about the subject, i personally found the article extremely patronizing and narrow.

me+him for 15 yrs, welcomed our little one march 25th, 2010.

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#7 of 22 Old 08-22-2009, 08:19 AM
 
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OK, point taken.

Probably totally off topic now, but have you noticed the people who say they love labor and birth somehow always seem to have had homebirths? Do you think it is at all possible to want a repeat experience if you give birth at a hospital? In the sense of "I had a terrific, empowering birth! Can't wait for the next one!" ?

I'm Olivia. I blog about physiological childbirth, homebirth, and unassisted homebirth!
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#8 of 22 Old 08-23-2009, 12:25 AM
 
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I guess it also depends on who you ask. I wouldn't generalize..
I had two hospital births, the first one being medicated and the second one being completely unmedicated. I enjoyed both of them and felt empowered by both of my births and had no problems with the hospital staff. ( Besides being woken up so much by them..lol)

I am planning a homebirth for my next birth for the simple reasons that I've done labor and birth twice, and my labors tend to progress quickly. Since I managed just fine without pain killers or interventions last time, I see no reason why I couldn't do the same thing in our cozy home.

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#9 of 22 Old 08-24-2009, 11:13 PM
 
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I've only had one... and it wasnt the best experience (home birth transfer to hospital), but I love the challenge of giving birth again. I also liked being pregnant - I've never felt/ looked so good in my life as when I was pregnant (in second and third trimesters anyway).

The thought of "owning" another baby - bleh... but the thought of being pregnant and being in labor and getting that wriggling, slimy, beautiful baby handed to me - heaven!

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#10 of 22 Old 08-25-2009, 11:37 AM
 
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I am. Total bumpoholic here I do love being pg sooo much I can't wait to do it again, though it's strange not sure now if I want a third. . . but I do love being pg!!!

Samantha:: love.gif {Waldorf Doll Maker} broc1.gif{Organic Farmer}knit.gif{crafter} computergeek2.gif {blogger}  and crunchy mama to 4 boys under 5! run.gif

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#11 of 22 Old 08-29-2009, 02:13 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MittensKittens View Post
OK, point taken.

Probably totally off topic now, but have you noticed the people who say they love labor and birth somehow always seem to have had homebirths? Do you think it is at all possible to want a repeat experience if you give birth at a hospital? In the sense of "I had a terrific, empowering birth! Can't wait for the next one!" ?
Well, I had a terrific, empowering birth! At a hospital. I was young and didn't really know that homebirth was an option. But I did the whole labor at home (I just kept waiting for it to get worse coz of all the horror stories I'd heard about the pain, and it never did), so I was at the hospital less than a half hour when she was born---didn't need nurses or midwife (the midwife literally got there in time to throw down her keys and catch the baby). The worst part was the hospital nurses.

But the whole experience showed me that I could have a homebirth--the labor and delivery was so positive that I knew had I stayed home an hour longer, I'd have had her at home, and it would have been fine.

So when we have another child, I will go into the experience knowing that I will have a positive strong birth at home, based on my prior experience which did result in a strong, empowering hospital birth.

Happy and in love with my family!
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#12 of 22 Old 09-07-2009, 02:05 AM
 
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I am. Total bumpoholic here I do love being pg sooo much I can't wait to do it again, though it's strange not sure now if I want a third. . . but I do love being pg!!!
I would love another newborn but don't want to be pregnant again. Maybe we could work something out. Oh and I'd like a boy.
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#13 of 22 Old 09-07-2009, 07:06 PM
 
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I think I'm a bumpaholic. I have an almost 6-month-old, and I can't wait for the next! I would like to have at least 3 or 4 kids, but DH only wants 2, and says he will get a vasectomy after #2 is born. : Anywho, I would love being pregnant and giving birth a bunch, but I don't want to be a mom to more than 3 or 4. LOL. I might consider being a surrogate one day.

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#14 of 22 Old 09-08-2009, 12:08 AM
 
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Originally Posted by BonnieNova View Post
... the thought of being pregnant and being in labor and getting that wriggling, slimy, beautiful baby handed to me - heaven!
:

I had 3 hospital births that were not empowering, but when they hand that baby to you and you look into a part of yourself....there are no words.
I did love being pregnant and felt great and loved the anticipation of pink or blue and who it was going to look like...
Then they start developing their own opinions and asking why they can't wear a bra when everyone else is.....LOL

Jenn (36), wife to DH for 13 years, DD1(13) , DD2(10) and DS(4)

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#15 of 22 Old 09-11-2009, 02:56 AM
 
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Hi.... My name is Andrea..... And I'm a bumpaholic... *everyone says "Hi Andrea" in a monotone welcoming voice* lol... I'm just picturing that meeting, LOL!

Anyways, yes, I love love love having babies... and raising them too. Of course the raising them is the hardest part, but I love it nonetheless.

Oh, and I've had 2 high intervention hospital births, 1 birth centre waterbirth and 1 home waterbirth. The first two were somewhat traumatic, but they didn't scare me away from having more.

Andi - roller derby, slave to the hoop, birth junkie, lover of love, single mama of 4
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#16 of 22 Old 09-13-2009, 07:06 PM
 
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um yes. It's kinda sad really.
I knew a mom growing up who LOVED babies. But once they got to be unruly toddlers she was not so enamored and had to have another babe in arms. The older kids wound up taking care of the youngers mostly since mom was always preoccupied with a new baby. It was just sad for the kids because she was not so much into the raising them, more just having babies.
I think some women are addicted to the attention that being pregnant brings. I know a couple women like that. As soon as they have a baby they are all "I want another baby!" Not to be judgemental, but I am kinda like, "The baby you already have needs your attention now."

Personally, I'm with previous posts. If I could skip the pregnancy but just have the labor/delivery I think I might have more kiddos. My first birth was a great experience. (Bradley birth at a hospital.) Hard work, but so worth it!
Of course I'm only on my second baby so we'll see how this one goes. My first son was colicky and "high needs" the newborn phase was very very trying. The toddler phases have been equally wonderful and trying as well... he is so very "spirited"! LOL

I love the idea of a big family, but I'm not sure I'm down for all the work. Maybe if I have a more mellow child next time I'll feel more confident about it. Right now I'm just taking it one at a time.

Obviously not a bumpaholic here! LOL

~Kaiya~

 

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#17 of 22 Old 09-13-2009, 07:08 PM
 
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Then they start developing their own opinions and asking why they can't wear a bra when everyone else is.....LOL
hahaha

~Kaiya~

 

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#18 of 22 Old 09-14-2009, 05:24 AM
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I'm related to a bumpaholic. They just announced, publicly, that #19 is on the way. Although their reason for so many is because they believe having as many "arrows" as possible will please god.
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#19 of 22 Old 09-15-2009, 06:15 PM
 
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Originally Posted by MittensKittens View Post
OK, point taken.

Probably totally off topic now, but have you noticed the people who say they love labor and birth somehow always seem to have had homebirths? Do you think it is at all possible to want a repeat experience if you give birth at a hospital? In the sense of "I had a terrific, empowering birth! Can't wait for the next one!" ?
I've had terrific, empowering births, in a hospital with my m/w.

I thought this was my last baby, She is now 22 months and dd1 and ds are almost 9 and 6. I thought I was done, dh thought we are done. I am not done. This is the first time I've admitted this really... wow.
I feel that familiar broody sensation, that drive to become pregnant again. I feel like there is 1 more tto come to us.
I am blessed with healthy pgs and babies, but have had 2 losses and youngest dd began with a twin. We've battled primary and secondary infertility, and again. I love being pregnant even though I am so sick I've lost an average of 35 lbs with each pregnancy. I am terribly ill in pg, but the anticipation and then the amazement of birthing my baby is what seems the focus~ for lack of a better word... does this make sense to anyone else? LOL
I can't imagine never doing it again. I feel like there is 1 more waiting...
I am feeling alot of different things right now. A lot.

natural birthin', baby catchin', cloth addicted, intactalactavist mama of 12/00, 6/03, 10/07, 8/10 & our angelcubs three
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#20 of 22 Old 09-18-2009, 03:17 PM
 
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Originally Posted by MittensKittens View Post
OK, point taken.

Probably totally off topic now, but have you noticed the people who say they love labor and birth somehow always seem to have had homebirths? Do you think it is at all possible to want a repeat experience if you give birth at a hospital? In the sense of "I had a terrific, empowering birth! Can't wait for the next one!" ?
I have three kids & had three hospital births. There were things that did not go perfectly but I still LOVE giving birth. There is just nothing like it in this world, what an amazing gift. I couldn't wait to do it again each time. So, for me at least the hospital birth didn't rob me of that feeling.

Now, to the article. I don't know, the term "bump aholic" sets my teeth on edge. The whole thing rubs me the wrong way, can't explain it exactly.

It's like, I'm sure there are those rare mothers who just won't stop even when they should but that's the exception. I'd say the majority of us make a rational decision about having children and looking at what we can handle and if you enjoy it at the same time, all the better.

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#21 of 22 Old 09-18-2009, 03:42 PM
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Now, to the article. I don't know, the term "bump aholic" sets my teeth on edge. The whole thing rubs me the wrong way, can't explain it exactly.

It's like, I'm sure there are those rare mothers who just won't stop even when they should but that's the exception. I'd say the majority of us make a rational decision about having children and looking at what we can handle and if you enjoy it at the same time, all the better.
Someone who is a something-aholic are doing that something beyond the point of healthy, with a total disregard for the consequences, an addict. Alcoholics drink to excess, for instance, without a care for what could happen to them or to others. This doesn't mean alcohol in itself, even in sometimes high quantities, is necessarily bad.

Nadya Suleman is a bump-aholic. She wants a ton of kids and who cares where the money will come from. She'll just take it from taxpayers because she wants kids, therefore she'll have a messload.

The Duggars want as many as they can have. Who cares that the older ones care full-time for the younger ones as if they are the parents instead.

People who have as many as they can just because they like being pregnant and having babies, then shuttle them into the care of someone else, like a nanny or older sibling, are bump-aholics.

People who think through what having another child means, and whether or not they can afford it and have the time themselves to parent the child, aren't bump-aholics even if they just happen to love being pregnant.

Pregnant for the primary love of being pregnant and the attention of a newborn rather than pregnant for a child to raise themselves is the difference.

It' just that celebrities give pregnancy a bad reputation these days, and all the fuss and worship around shows about big families that make all big families look bad. It's the same type of deal for infertile couples who seek medical help. We're pegged as being selfish people thanks to Octomom and the Gosselin and the Table for 12 family. You've just got to learn to separate between those who do it for the wrong reason from those who di it because it's been maturely and rationally thought out further than, "I want I want I want!"
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#22 of 22 Old 10-30-2009, 07:09 PM
 
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