I really need help :/ - Mothering Forums

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#1 of 5 Old 08-16-2014, 08:35 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I really need help :/

Idk if this is even the right forum to post in for this, but I really need some opinions.

I'm 28 weeks pregnant right now.
When I trace back to when I concived, fatherhood gets a little iffy....

I don't want to sound like a whore, because I'm far from it.
That week I was at my best friends house drinking a little and we've had a history of hooking up. That night we did have unprotected sex.

Later that week, I started casually seeing someone. We did fool around a lot sooner then I'd like to admit, but we did use a condom.

I'm going crazy now because it's so close to my due date, and I don't kow what to do anymore.
I have so many feelings for my friend, who I truly believe is the father, but he doesn't want to fully take the step as being a couple until we know for sure if he is or not, which I fully understand. It just hurts so much. All I want is to know if he is or not, but prebirth paternity blood test cost so much and I simply can't afford it right now.

Who do you guys think is more likely to be the father? I want to know honest opinions too.

This whole time my best friend has been there for me through all this, but the closer I am to giving birth, the more distant he becomes. The other guy doesn't even know I'm pregnant, and I haven't even heard from him since we broke things off. I didn't even know I was pregnant until a month later, I had had my period a week after I conceived.

What should I do here?
Do OB offices offer a cheaper blood test, does insurance even cover things like that?

I just have so many questions, I don't know where to begin to get answers.

I just need help right now.
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#2 of 5 Old 08-16-2014, 09:27 PM
 
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If you had unprotected sex with one person and then sex with a condom with another the chances are way higher that the unprotected guy is the father.
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#3 of 5 Old 08-16-2014, 09:36 PM - Thread Starter
 
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That's been my thought the whole time.
We didn't even know there could be any doubt about it until my first ob appoiment when they told us how far along I was.

The main reason he really doubts it is because he doesn't remember messing around that week.
I do though because I had feelings for him way before any of this, and us having sex was something I never really forgot. Plus I have messages talking to people about being at his place drinking that week and the only time we never had sex after drinking was if either of us were seeing someone.

I just hate having to go through all this.
Not to mention I was just in a major car wreck, kept in the hospital for 24 hours. All I wanted was for him to be there and be with me.
He was there, but not the way I needed. Like I can see that he wants to be close, but stays distant just in case it's not his child.
It's just hard.
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#4 of 5 Old 08-18-2014, 08:52 AM
 
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You should call your insurance and see if the test is covered. If not, try to find the money to have the test done. Seeing that your best friend is likely to be the father, ask him for half and by slim chance the baby is not then pay him back later.
I can understand how he may be hesitant if the baby is his or not.
Nothing can be done until the baby is born right?
Continue to enjoy your pregnancy and don't stress it. Your having a baby!! And you know for sure one parent will be around, and that's you. Motherhood is not an easy journey . You are mama now and this is your job and commitment whether any test is done or whatever the test results show.
Best to you
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#5 of 5 Old 08-18-2014, 02:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tracyamber View Post
You should call your insurance and see if the test is covered. If not, try to find the money to have the test done. Seeing that your best friend is likely to be the father, ask him for half and by slim chance the baby is not then pay him back later.
I can understand how he may be hesitant if the baby is his or not.
Nothing can be done until the baby is born right?
Continue to enjoy your pregnancy and don't stress it. Your having a baby!! And you know for sure one parent will be around, and that's you. Motherhood is not an easy journey . You are mama now and this is your job and commitment whether any test is done or whatever the test results show.
Best to you
Yea, we've already planned on splitting the costs. I think he believes it's his, but like I can understand, he's not 100%.
Trying not to stress too bad. It's just been a hard pregnancy all the way though.

But I was looking at reverse due date calculators and they were all saying I would have had to have sex between Feb 10-17 which does line up more with him.

Thanks =]
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