We're the poorest family in the neighborhood tribe - Page 2 - Mothering Forums
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#31 of 37 Old 09-21-2010, 05:52 PM
 
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Originally Posted by laughingfox View Post
That's us.

I get really frustrated sometimes, because no one understands. My friends think I'm blowing them off if I say I can't afford to go to the movies, and my out-of-town friends want to know why I haven't visited them lately. I know so many people who say they're "broke" when they have savings, credit cards, and money in the bank, and no one seems to understand that when I say I'm broke, I mean it.
Same here! We used to be comfortable financially, but then we went through a time where we were so terribly poor I was truly scared we’d end up homeless. Well-meaning friends would tell me how they lived paycheck to paycheck and couldn’t afford things either, but I just wished we COULD live paycheck to paycheck. And these were friends who could go to theme parks with all their children, movies, date nights, conferences, etc. It was frustrating.

We live in a neighborhood now where I know we are not the poorest, but we might be close. Still, it’s partly a choice as I CHOOSE to stay at home with my children and live frugally and responsibly. I have to remind myself frequently that I don’t NEED make-up, designer purses, designer clothes (or even NEW clothes!), a new car, etc. I have to remind myself that having that kind of money would probably make me less appreciative, less concerned. It would be nice to be able to get the nasty carpet cleaned though! (Rental house - I *hate* carpet!)
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#32 of 37 Old 09-24-2010, 08:52 AM
 
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sign us up! most of our friends jokingly refer to us as 'downwardly mobile', but really the description does fit, in an economic sense. one of our ideals is to live as well as possible on as little money as possible (and with minimum environmental impact - the two often seem to dovetail naturally). we have our extravagances, but we recognise them as treats and not baseline ways of living. lately we've been making more money than we're accustomed to, so we're carefully considering how to best allocate it rather than just frittering it away on this or that. living in other countries has been immensely instructive in this matter - in Nepal, for instance, we learned how to live on a maximum of three dollars (USD) per day! it's made our lives feel richer, also....we have more fun finding alternate ways of meeting material needs than just putting out cash.

it's alienated some of our friends, though - the sorts who we knew as crazy teenagers but decided to try to be as 'normal' as possible the moment they conceived of themselves as 'Adults'. it feels horrible to be rejected by people you care about simply because you don't pursue or value money in the same way they do.

thankfully, our two year old daughter gave us the perfect mantra. when asked why we do things the way we do, she responds (with all the self-assurance of a toddler) 'because that's the way we like it'
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#33 of 37 Old 09-24-2010, 04:17 PM
 
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I think I belong here. I won't say we're the poorest, but we're definitely near the bottom. We live on the "poor" end of town with my parents in a house that was damaged during Katrina. I haven't been able to find permanent work in somewhere between 1.5 and 2 years. My husband was injured on the job and, consequently, lost the job. (There's a long story there!) In the end, we have no income except what my dad makes. Mom is disabled, though unable to draw disability, and my dad should be. We have one car between all of us. (Even the other "poor" people around here seem to have multiple NICE cars... Guess there are differences of priority somewhere?) We have a 2-year-old son, and I am 12 weeks pregnant with a second child. (Amazing how I have to explain to people that we actually did have an income when I got pregnant both times.) My husband might be able to get a desk job soon, but it's still another couple of weeks before the job will even start. We're doing our best to live as frugally as possible. Luckily, we had the desire to do so before it became a necessity.

Married to DH since February 2005, mother of selectivevax.gifdelayedvax.gifDS (8/18/2008) and DD in (4/2/2011)!  lactivist.gif familybed2.gif  Expecting stork-suprise.gif February 2013!

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#34 of 37 Old 10-16-2010, 09:20 PM
 
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May I join in? We moved recently to a town a lot better than the previous one where we lived. It was dh's idea. The previous town had it's bad parts but we rented in a good part. We moved because of some unavoidable circumstances. I wanted to go to a place equally good but not worse. Wherever we decided to go we were going to end up paying more rent because you start a new lease and have to pay by present standards not what you would pay 6 yrs ago, like we did at the old place. There was a more affordable town but dh didn't want the stressful commute to work. So here we are in 1/2 of a house and are the poorest ones around. But here's the worst part. After we moved dh realizes he doesn't like the house because of privacy issues. (I never liked it. It was an extremely stressful move for me, but that's another story.) So, now we are in this expensive town with nowhere to go as all independent apts. cost an arm and a leg and he still refuses to have a slightly longer commute. We are poor and unfortunately not happy either.

Let me make sure that my thoughts, words and actions are beneficial to the scene in which I find myself ~ Unknown
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#35 of 37 Old 10-16-2010, 09:27 PM
 
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Originally Posted by FLMom6Kids View Post

We live in a neighborhood now where I know we are not the poorest, but we might be close. Still, it’s partly a choice as I CHOOSE to stay at home with my children and live frugally and responsibly. I have to remind myself frequently that I don’t NEED make-up, designer purses, designer clothes (or even NEW clothes!), a new car, etc. I have to remind myself that having that kind of money would probably make me less appreciative, less concerned.
yeah, this is us too. if i worked, i would double our income. BUT 1) i would have to find a job in this economy, and 2) i would be putting my babies in daycare and not be able to hs. it is a choice we have made, but it is still frustrating.
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#36 of 37 Old 10-17-2010, 04:29 PM
 
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LOVE this tribe; this is so us!!!

We don't consider ourselves to be poor (okay, dp does ), but part of the "global middle class". We have food, shelter, clothing, electricity... oh yeah, and we spend 1/3 of our teeny-tiny income on private school for ds. No true hardships.
We live in a 1 bedroom that we share with ds, and are veggie for mostly economic reasons (so we can buy most of our food at the Farmer's Mkt).
And that's it. Our expenses are: rent, school, utilities, and food. No frills. But lots of fun "poor" friends, and music, and trade... and dumpster diving .

Beth
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#37 of 37 Old 11-22-2010, 09:33 PM
 
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While there are lots of other people in our neighborhood like us, who rent an apartment in a house, there are lots more who don't...especially DD's school where she says her best friend is SO lucky because her mom said she can get WHATEVER she wants when she loses her teeth.  I do have lots of friends who thrift store shop but I am also surrounded by people who have live-in help.  So many people do not cook their own food.  I also live among people who buy LOTS of meat which is expensive.  Thankfully I do have friends who value thrifty living, but it's hard because we are surrounded by so much affluence.

 


~~~Set the gearshift for the high gear of your soul...you've got to run like a lamb queen out of control~~~
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