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#121 of 182 Old 10-01-2008, 04:50 PM
 
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Mammaduck- doesn't the school have a financial aid office? That's where we got the heads up to most of our grants. Everything we got is Synod specific, otherwise I'd point you in that direction.
The school is non-accredited. Depending upon our denominations financial support standing with the school, hubby should be able to receive a tuition waiver. But the school doesn't qualify for any other kinds of grants other than VA. Though a veteran, they've tightened the qualifications up on those so much that he most likely won't qualify and it would be for tuition only, not living expenses.

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#122 of 182 Old 10-03-2008, 04:10 PM
 
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Shoot, I don't come here and miss the wild time.

It sounds like it was not a fun situation. I totally agree how people's heart really show at times, and it's pretty. And when they are supposed to be representatives of God, well, I get annoyed.
But then I'm not perfect, and I'm trying to show grace to everyone, but I sure need it!

The children's choir sounds fun!

I have no suggestions for the grants. Sorry.

ETA: We take 16 mo DD to Bible study with us and she runs around and 'visits' everyone. If someone didn't like it, I'd quit. Sitting in church, well, she does sometimes. We end up walking around a lot during the service. She likes the nursery at MOPS, but I don't want to put her in when I don't really *have to* or anymore than I need to.

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#123 of 182 Old 10-03-2008, 11:38 PM - Thread Starter
 
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I used to have these dreams of a passel of perfectly behaved children on the pew next to me. But there's only one of me. No one offers to sit with me and help (which is fine and everything; I'm just sayin'). And Daddy is right up front, the baby wants him, and the five-year-old keeps yelling out answers to rhetorical questions ("Are there any other announcements? TELL THEM ABOUT MY BIRTHDAY PARTY, DADDY!" "Was John's baptism of God or of man?: "OF MAN!!!" --wrong answer, sweetie)

So, much as it's hard to let go of the ideal, I really do think they'll be happier playing in the nursery. And I'll be a nicer mama.

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#124 of 182 Old 10-04-2008, 08:50 PM
 
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Does anyone else live in a parsonage? With all the "fun" that entails?

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#125 of 182 Old 10-04-2008, 09:51 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Does anyone else live in a parsonage? With all the "fun" that entails?
We lived in one for a year while DH was on internship. The Boy Scouts kept showing up on my front porch thinking they were meeting in my basement, and our bedroom curtains were the same garish red print as the ones in the church library. It was like waking up in hell. Never. Again.

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#126 of 182 Old 10-04-2008, 11:41 PM
 
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And Daddy is right up front, the baby wants him, and the five-year-old keeps yelling out answers to rhetorical questions ("Are there any other announcements? TELL THEM ABOUT MY BIRTHDAY PARTY, DADDY!" "Was John's baptism of God or of man?: "OF MAN!!!" --wrong answer, sweetie)

So, much as it's hard to let go of the ideal, I really do think they'll be happier playing in the nursery. And I'll be a nicer mama.
I wonder if she'd like the nursery more. Maybe later. I just want her with me. even if she's an antsy-pants. She's mine!

Oh dear. My dad had an older fellow who sat on the second row and would answer the questions sometimes. He also didn't like it when my dad laughed--which was a lot. My dad loves to tell stories.

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#127 of 182 Old 10-05-2008, 10:27 AM
 
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Does anyone else live in a parsonage? With all the "fun" that entails?
Our current appointment has a parsonage. We like this one! The master bedroom could be a bit bigger, but that's my only complaint. We're at the end of a dead-end street (not a cul-de-sac, but a REAL dead-end. Our neighbor parks his hunting pickup in the grassy spot where the road just ends.) This parsonage even has a handicap ramp that's great for scooters and bikes. Our kids have a big yard to play in. We've been doing school outside at the table in our carport just about every day. We watch the cows while we do our work.

Our church takes good care of the parsonage. We've had one or two minor issues, and they have taken care of it right away. Our church members here give us our space and privacy. I've never had a church member here just show up without notice.

Our last parsonage was a nightmare (as was the church that owned it).

The housing allowance before that turned into a nightmare! Trying to sell a home on 6 weeks notice is just impractical. It sat on the market for a year. We'll be paying for that for the next decade.

The first parsonage that I lived in was my favorite. Ahhhhh, the memories. It was a 4 bedroom brick with white columns, across for the Zoo in a big city. I would move back there in a heartbeat.
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#128 of 182 Old 10-05-2008, 10:48 AM
 
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Hi everyone! My DH is an ordained minister and right now he's with an international Christian school. We are missionaries overseas and have been here for 7 years. Reading everyone's posts makes me not feel like it's so crazy with kids in church, responsibilities, expectations, etc.

annettemarie, that's so funny about your DS answering in church!

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#129 of 182 Old 10-05-2008, 05:57 PM
 
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Now- if you have opted out of Social Security you don't have to pay taxes on the parsonage, just the salary. One of the biggest benefits I've seen of a parsonage. Well, that and not having to sell it.

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#130 of 182 Old 10-06-2008, 09:11 PM
 
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Clergy tax law is one big convoluted mess! If dh could go back and choose again, he would opt out of SS. But at the time, he felt a sense of responsibility for his parent's generation.
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#131 of 182 Old 10-06-2008, 09:14 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Here's something I was wondering-- I know a church can lose its tax-exempt status for endorsing a candidate from the pulpit. If there was a parsonage, could the residents put signs in the yard endorsing a candidate? If we wanted to, could we, since our house is paid for with our housing allowance? I'm totally just curious.

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#132 of 182 Old 10-07-2008, 12:00 AM
 
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Here's something I was wondering-- I know a church can lose its tax-exempt status for endorsing a candidate from the pulpit. If there was a parsonage, could the residents put signs in the yard endorsing a candidate? If we wanted to, could we, since our house is paid for with our housing allowance? I'm totally just curious.
I asked DH and he said (and I quote), "Dunno. Wouldn't risk it." A really safe way to do it is put up issue signs- with your standpoint on the issues, not the candidates.

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#133 of 182 Old 10-07-2008, 12:00 AM
 
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Clergy tax law is one big convoluted mess! If dh could go back and choose again, he would opt out of SS. But at the time, he felt a sense of responsibility for his parent's generation.
It IS a mess. I'm really glad that DH opted out- I just don't think SS is going to be around.

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#134 of 182 Old 10-08-2008, 10:43 AM
 
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Prayers. Tonight is the first meeting of our steps towards seminary. Application has been made, 2 letters received, preparing to move several states away (but my homestate, so YAY!), looking for a house to rent, hubby is working on his resume, and he's looking for a decent paying, full time, blue collar job. Please keep us in prayer. This is scary and exciting at the same time.

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#135 of 182 Old 10-08-2008, 04:44 PM
 
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Does anyone else live in a parsonage? With all the "fun" that entails?
Yep, another parsonage-dweller here. It's not bad, really. We can't afford a house (even with a housing allowance, it's just not a good idea at the moment), and they really do leave us alone. It's a much bigger home than we could afford (4 bedrooms, 2.5 baths, with a full basement that half of is finished). I have no complaints. I never thought I'd like living in a parsonage, and it does have a few drawbacks, but it's really been great for us overall.
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#136 of 182 Old 10-08-2008, 08:24 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hey mamas, I started a thread about opting out of SS here, if anyone wants to chime in.

Also, I don't think I've told you how thrilled I am to see this thread hopping!

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#137 of 182 Old 10-09-2008, 08:27 PM
 
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OK...here's my take on the SS thing... It is my understanding that in order to opt out, you are supposedly saying that you are philosophically opposed to all forms of state assistance. That would include food stamps, medicaid, welfare, etc. Since dh and I are not opposed to those things in principle (even if not in practice these days) we do not opt out of SS. I may be wrong about that, but that's the discussion I seem to remember having with him way back when...
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#138 of 182 Old 10-09-2008, 10:39 PM
 
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OK...here's my take on the SS thing... It is my understanding that in order to opt out, you are supposedly saying that you are philosophically opposed to all forms of state assistance. That would include food stamps, medicaid, welfare, etc. Since dh and I are not opposed to those things in principle (even if not in practice these days) we do not opt out of SS. I may be wrong about that, but that's the discussion I seem to remember having with him way back when...
You are conscienciously objecting to welfare/ aid for money earned preaching. It's on the form 4461. You aren't saying that you are opposed to any of those things that you listed- just for paying in on money earned from the church.

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#139 of 182 Old 10-28-2008, 10:22 PM - Thread Starter
 
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How is everyone doing? I'm feeling stretched and like I really need a break, but have no hope of getting one. In the past two months, I have probably had 3 hours completely to myself. DH's schedule has been nuts, he went away on retreat for a week, and he's been working on his days off. Granted, it's funerals and the like, and I get that he has to do it, but still.. it leaves me really needing some time.

I have been avoiding going to the grocery store because I don't want to do it with 4 kids. It's not even that they're trouble. I'm just so tired of doing everything alone.

I could hire a sitter, but there's no one I really trust with all 4, including the baby, and I need to get away from him too.

Also, there's been a resurgence of the dumb phone calls. People are treating me like an unpaid secretary again, and it's ticking me off.

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#140 of 182 Old 10-28-2008, 10:25 PM
 
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How is everyone doing? I'm feeling stretched and like I really need a break, but have no hope of getting one. In the past two months, I have probably had 3 hours completely to myself. DH's schedule has been nuts, he went away on retreat for a week, and he's been working on his days off. Granted, it's funerals and the like, and I get that he has to do it, but still.. it leaves me really needing some time.

I have been avoiding going to the grocery store because I don't want to do it with 4 kids. It's not even that they're trouble. I'm just so tired of doing everything alone.

I could hire a sitter, but there's no one I really trust with all 4, including the baby, and I need to get away from him too.

Also, there's been a resurgence of the dumb phone calls. People are treating me like an unpaid secretary again, and it's ticking me off.
We're... ok. DH has started serving as a vacancy pastor at a church to the west on top of his original church, so we've doubled the amount of services and classes. And the amount of time he's away.
Other then that, things are good.
That's tough about the grocery store- is there a delivery service?

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#141 of 182 Old 10-28-2008, 10:26 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Not here. Plus for our budget to work, I have to go to three different stores, including an Amish surplus outlet. With coupons, it just works out better without kids.

Sounds like your schedule has gotten more complex as well.

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#142 of 182 Old 10-28-2008, 10:29 PM
 
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Not here. Plus for our budget to work, I have to go to three different stores, including an Amish surplus outlet. With coupons, it just works out better without kids.

Sounds like your schedule has gotten more complex as well.
It has, but I only have the two right now.
I know you said there's no one you'd trust to babysit them all, but what about leaving some of them with a sitter? Or doing 1 store a day?
We're 30 + miles from all shopping, so I just have to grit my teeth and get it done- knowing that there's a meltdown in store.
Will your DH's schedule relax after Advent?

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#143 of 182 Old 10-28-2008, 10:31 PM - Thread Starter
 
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After Epiphany there will be a brief lull until Lent. Well, sort of. He has the youth gathering sometime in January.

Please tell me Lent isn't superearly like it was last year...

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#144 of 182 Old 10-28-2008, 10:33 PM
 
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After Epiphany there will be a brief lull until Lent. Well, sort of. He has the youth gathering sometime in January.

Please tell me Lent isn't superearly like it was last year...
DH just said Lent is end of Feb, so a brief break there.
it sounds like it's a really hard time right now.

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#145 of 182 Old 10-28-2008, 10:37 PM - Thread Starter
 
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It will be OK. Maybe I could hire two youth group kids to come over and watch all 4. That's twice the money, though...

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#146 of 182 Old 10-28-2008, 10:43 PM
 
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It will be OK. Maybe I could hire two youth group kids to come over and watch all 4. That's twice the money, though...
I see an opportunity for confirmation extra credit!
Yeah, it sounds like a no win situation right now.

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#147 of 182 Old 10-28-2008, 10:45 PM - Thread Starter
 
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Hee. I keep telling DH he should offer "Sit with the pastor's wife and help her with the kids during church" as a Confirmation project, but he says no.

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#148 of 182 Old 10-28-2008, 10:49 PM
 
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Hee. I keep telling DH he should offer "Sit with the pastor's wife and help her with the kids during church" as a Confirmation project, but he says no.
I feel so lucky- at this church the president of the congregation and his wife sit with us most Sundays. It's so nice and I wish more congregations would help out pastor's wives.

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#149 of 182 Old 10-29-2008, 01:44 AM
 
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Hey ladies! We are also craazxy busy, LOL! We are in the process of moving (FInally! OFFIcially!) and we even have a timeline. We will be moving as soon as school is out for the winter break (dh's secular job is with the public schools) in Dec.

The 18th is the last day of school, then we will get the moving truck(s) on the road on the 19th.....which just so happens to be our 10th wedding anniversary! Woot! I have a feeling we're gonna have a super-romantic one--NOT! Maybe we can try for a quickie at a rest area, LOL! Or say--can you order in champagne and strawberries at a Motel 6?

Yeah, I didn't think so....

Oh, and then on the 20th, it's the baby's first birthday, which will also be spent on the road! Yee-haw! And hopefully, we'll make it to our new house (at least, hopefully we'll HAVE a new house by then! Haven't found one yet! ) by that evening, so we can start unpacking boxes...

So, we are officially cancelling all of Christmas and any incidental winter festivities. None of it is happening. I refuse to acknowledge that the rest of the world is enjoying cocoa and marshmallows by the fire while I'm unpacking boxes and hunting for toilet paper in a strange house.

Oh, and did I mention that we are leaving the (relative) warmth of Florida in Dec. to go to Ft. Wayne, INDIANA????? It must be God's will, because it makes no earthly sense! :

But seriously, I'm looking forward to it, and the kids are really excited, too. : Every day they ask if we are going to Indiana today...actually, the 2 yo says "Andy Anna"

I'm just feeling a mite overwhelmed, and having a hard time getting organized with what to do first. I guess what I need to do first is get off the computer, hmmm?

Love to you all!

Sarah, Queen of Hearts, raising a Full House with Michael, King of my Heart!
DS (2/02), DD (3/04), DS (1/06), DD (12/07), and DS (3/10)
~~*~~Not your typical Pastor's Wife!~~*~~
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#150 of 182 Old 10-29-2008, 10:41 AM - Thread Starter
 
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Sarah, you and your family will be in our prayers. Happy moving! And "Andy Anna" is too sweet.

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